It's not often we see older people represented positively on the Internet. "Retirement Homies" is one of the few social media projects that focuses on the experiences and positive representation of older people. We spoke about this issue with Jacynth Bassett, anti-ageist activist and Founder and CEO of Ageism Is Never In Style.

"Representation matters," she says. "It affects the way others see us and the way we see ourselves, and it fosters a sense of value and belonging within communities and society. We are all ageing, and we have an ageing population, and yet we continue to live in a youth-centric, ageist society which is largely fuelled by harmful stereotypes and outdated ageist ideas around older adults.

Bassett says that a whopping 6.3 million people name ageism as the cause of their depression. "So, age-positive representation is critical to transform these ageist, negative attitudes towards ageing – both within ourselves and externally. So much so that it's been found by that a positive attitude towards ageing can increase life expectancy by up to 7.5 years," Bassett explains.

Jacynth believes that social media can help change our outdated views about older people. "When used correctly, social media can play a really important and powerful role in connecting people, breaking down silos, and transforming ageist attitudes and narratives around ageing - held by those both young and old," she says.

"We internalise ageist stereotypes from as young as the age of 4, so, it's really important to offer representation and visibility for those who are older today, whilst also inspiring and uplifting younger generations to feel better about getting older and their futures," she continues. "As we say at "Ageism Is Never In Style," ageing is a privilege, not a punishment – not everyone is fortunate enough to grow old – so we need to change the narrative around ageing to reflect this."

While these types of representation matter, there are things that we should be cautious about. Bassett says that age-positive platforms must reflect how diverse and individual ageing is. "A lot of age-positive content right now is still very much through a particular lens – in particular white and privileged. And there are initiatives that might seem age-positive, but actually are somewhat patronising, stereotype, and present age through a youth-centric lens."

"So, it's really vital that those creating the content are educated on this, and don t treat older age as a monolithic experience and are truly age inclusive by both connecting with younger audiences, whilst equally reflecting and respecting the reality and experiences of those who are older," the anti-ageist activist explains.

Current statistics show that around 9.5 million seniors in the U.S. live in some kind of care facility. In 2023, the annual revenue for senior living was $94.2 billion, and experts predict that it will be growing in the coming years. Just in 2016, the annual revenue was $78.2 billion but investments in retirement housing are making it a growing industry.

However, only a very small percentage of people who are over 65 live in assisted care facilities – only 4.5%, which is about 1.5 million. So, the fear some of us might have of ending up in a retirement home near the end of our lives isn't that valid. 

But people who are at the end of their lives actually report being very happy. Experts refer to this phenomenon as the U-curve of Happiness. Apparently, most people say they're the least happy in their middle age, and that's around the time they're 40. Margit Cox Henderson, Ph.D. explains that middle age can be stressful for many people. There are performance demands, caregiving stressors, and anxious comparisons with peers.

The older we get, the more we turn from social competition to social connection. "As the end of life nears, priorities shift towards savoring life, love, and this present moment together," Henderson writes. "This gratitude for what matters most is easier to experience when life’s fleeting nature is salient."

So, people actually don't get sad or depressed because they're old. That might come from how others treat them. "It is not the passage of time that makes getting older so much harder than it has to be. It is ageism," writer and activist Ashton Applewhite claimed in her TED talk titled "Let's End Ageism."

We often think of elders as more experienced and wiser, and almost expect life advice from them. But is that always true? Dr. Ursula Staudinger, director of the Columbia Aging Center, says there are two types of wisdom: general and personal. General is where you might be wise enough to give good advice to others. Personal wisdom is the ability to reflect on your own experiences, failures, and wins.

Staudinger claims that older people can have more general wisdom but that younger people are more personally wise. She says that as we enter our twilight years, we try to rationalize and come to terms with the good and the bad choices that we've made. This positive type of thinking affects one's objectivity, making older people less wise about their personal lives.

However, there's some real truth in the saying that we should listen to our elders. In 2011, researchers from the University of Texas and Texas A&M University found that older people make decisions that are more likely to be rewarding to them in the long term. In some cases, the participants would take longer to make the decision than their younger counterparts, yet they chose options which gave them long-term benefits.

One of the study authors, professor pf psychology Todd Maddox explained: "'Broadly, these results suggest that younger adults may behave more impulsively, favouring immediate gains, while older adults are better at considering the long-term ramifications of their actions."