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Wedding planner Lisa Burton, who has about 15 years of experience throwing weddings abroad, said the best man and the father of the bride are the most traditional speech givers at a wedding. "The best man's speech is usually more comical, featuring stories about the groom, often rather embarrassing ones. The father’s speech is generally to thank guests for attending and sharing stories about the bride and of course to welcome the groom to the family," Burton told Bored Panda.

Burton has planned over 1,600 weddings and she said the speeches traditionally take place after dinner and is one of the last formalities before the party starts. "However, recently couples are choosing to have their speeches before dinner, allowing those involved to relax and enjoy themselves, rather than be nervous throughout the meal about their impending speech and how it may be received."

"The less conventional couples we work with choose to leave out speeches altogether, opting for a more relaxed day overall with very little tradition or formality.," the wedding planner added.

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech I work as a banqueting chef, and last year after the wedding had happened, vows said, rings exchanged, and bellies filled with food and wine, the groom stood to say the following: 'Today I married the woman of my dreams, and I'd like to thank her for everything she has done for me. I would also like to thank my best man, who has been f**king her since we got engaged...
...With that, he mumbled a 'cheers,' downed his champagne, and got a taxi to the airport to start his honeymoon alone. It turns out he found out four months before the wedding and had told the father of the bride everything was costing more, [the father] was writing cheques to cover his little girl's special day, and all the money went toward the groom's new life out of the country.

coolez-nunez Report

Final score:

266points

POST

Paul C. 2 years ago (edited)

Got invited to the wedding of one of the Directors at work. He was without doubt one of the most obnoxious people I've ever met. He had no real friends hence the invites to work colleagues. Free meal so, hey, why not? He chose one of his co directors, as best man, even though he had nothing good to say about him. Needless to say, the "Best Man" didn't write a speech, but instead got drunk and rambled on for about fifteen minutes about absolute nonsense. It was, sad, cringeworthy, painful and hilarious all in one. Felt sorry for the bride, who seemed a lovely lady, but God only knows why she married him.

75points

Leodavinci 2 years ago

To answer the last sentence... it was most likely money.

5points

Iggy 2 years ago

Wasn't fair on the father of the bride.

22points

Mary Lou 2 years ago

Yeah, I mean it's outright criminal and also not even morally justified, as the father is not to blame...

8points

Ellie Rosser 2 years ago

But he actually married her, so now there's a whole load of hassle to get her out of his life!

14points

LH25 2 years ago

I wonder if he can get it annulled?

10points

Demi Zwaan 2 years ago

I hope it wasn't a legal wedding then? Because that would just be dumb.

11points

APL 2 years ago

If you don't consummate the wedding, it can be annulled.

9points

MyCatsTheRealPanda 2 years ago

It would be dumb but if it was legal He may have really loved her so he didn't care that he wouldn't be able to move on fast. It was probably more of a f**k you to the bride who is now married to him and stuck married and unable to really move on with anyone else- including the best man. Kind of a made her bed kind of situatioN. Idk if that's the case obviously but just a possibility. He probably felt like it was one last way to get back at her and something she's going to be stuck with and have to deal with for a bit.

6points

C.Douglas 2 years ago

All that matters legally, in the US, is the marriage license. You can have whatever ceremonies you want

5points

Paul C. 2 years ago (edited)

Demi Zwaan ,sorry thought you had replied to my comment.

0points

Hannah Edwards 2 years ago

I don’t see why the bride’s family has to suffer.

6points

UrWhyteFright IsUrProblem 2 years ago

Well he raised her selfish ass, daddy's little princess learned it from somewhere. Either he, his wife or both. Either way he did nothing to stop it

0points

Francisco Manuel Teruel Gutiérrez 2 years ago (edited)

That man is an idiot. This scene at the wedding, stealing money from teh FIL to be... Going on for 6 months only for the revenge... Sorry, but I won't clap this guy.

6points

DennyS (denzoren) 2 years ago

Oh wow, that's a horrible situation. I feel really bad for the bride's father though (unless he knew) but I hope the groom had a good honeymoon and life.

6points

Buren 2 years ago

Power move

5points

Suzi Q 2 years ago

Why did he say "I do?" Now he's going to pay for a divorce or annulment.

2points

UrWhyteFright IsUrProblem 2 years ago

He left the country. No judge in America has the legal authority to force him back or force money out of him from another country. He didn't take the marriage with him so he doesn't have to even claim it in another country

0points

Trevor hardy 2 years ago

I'd like to high 5 that guy

2points

Mickie Shea 2 years ago

That was a cool dump of a wayward GF/Wife. However seems sucky to her father.

1point

Emma Starr 2 years ago

Wow. Maximum effort.

1point

Janelle Collard Premium 2 years ago

Good one, Groom! You win!

0points

backatya 2 years ago

s**t

0points

Brent Kaufman 2 years ago

But he still married her? What's up with that? Why not do that at the altar before the guy says, 'I now pronounce you....'? Now he has to deal with getting an annulment.

0points

Jeremy Bell 2 years ago

But he was still married to her????

0points

Freder 2 years ago

Sounds like bs

0points

OmMarol 2 years ago

he should've done that before marrying her, and just run away if the trip and everything was already paid

0points

Michelle Lew, the owner of Lavender Crown Events, a wedding planning company servicing San Jose, Silicon Valley, and the surrounding areas, explained to Bored Panda that one of the first things she tells people is, "Remember it is a toast, not a speech."

"Toasts are generally 2-4 minutes long whereas speeches are 5+ minutes (but usually 10+)," Lew said. "A lot of times, the speech may be great, but guests will easily get bored if it is too long, especially when there are 4 long speeches back to back."

"While couples may ask a certain person to give a toast, it's important that they also consider what is off-limits," Lew pointed out. "Often, I've seen embarrassing stories included in speeches that the couple doesn't want to be shared. In other cases, I've also heard bad speeches where the speaker would side with one person of the couple rather than consider them a pair. For example, there was one instance where the bride's sister (the maid of honor) gave a speech that outwardly disdained the groom rather than celebrating the couple's future together. I believe the main cause of a bad speech is when the speaker and the couple truly do not understand each other or do not have the best intentions."

When a speaker is invited, they should know the limits of what to share and what to omit, Lew said.

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech I've only been to one wedding, and it was my dad's cousin's wedding. My dad's uncle (the groom's father) did a toast when the groom and bride were at the altar (is this normal? Everyone around me seemed confused), and he said, 'I'm glad I made it out here today. I just want you guys to know that I have cancer and I'm going to die soon. Congrats to my son and his beautiful bride. Enjoy your time!' Everyone was in complete silence. It was the most awkward thing I've possibly ever witnessed. FWIW, this was in 2008, and the groom's father is still alive.

backupcoin Report

Final score:

173points

POST

Me Oh My 2 years ago

Attention hog?

128points

However, the lines aren't always clear. "There’s a difficult balance when deciding what to include in a wedding speech," Lisa Burton said.

"I don’t think there's anything wrong with harmless innuendo, but I do think being too personal and too rude is bad taste. Remember that the speech is meant to entertain rather than an opportunity to embarrass or take the limelight away from the bride and groom."

The wedding planner thinks speeches are a lovely way to celebrate the bride and groom’s love story and likes to encourage her less traditional couples to be creative in how they present their speeches.

But if a couple decides to, Burton said they can even leave out speeches altogether. "After all, rules were made to be broken weren’t they?" At least that way you know for sure that the only people attendants risk insulting are themselves.

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Father of the bride described her as the 'ugly duckling' of the family, got booed.

Maihashi Report

Final score:

171points

POST

Me Oh My 2 years ago

As he should have been.

143points

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my parent's wedding the priest started with "We are gathered at this funeral today..." the worst part is he started going on with the typical funeral speech until he was stopped. To be fair he was well past retirement age.

McJennifer , www.pexels.com Report

Final score:

155points

POST

T. D. Bostick 2 years ago

Read the room, dude!

68points

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech One wedding I went to, the pastor started giving the typical 'marriage is hard work' speech. He talks about how many marriages fail and all the people he's counseled through divorce. He goes on about how on their wedding day, they're just like this couple who thinks they're going to make it but six months later they're getting a divorce...
...I'm trying hard to keep a straight face, the groom is starting to look like he wants to punch the guy, and I can hear people behind me disguising laughing as coughing. I keep expecting him to bring it around to something positive, but he doesn't. Fifteen minutes of 'marriage is hard and lots of them don't work.' Find out at the reception, he was a family friend. With a lifelong unrequited crush on the bride.

Final score:

154points

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Bored_Groo 2 years ago

Ah…

57points

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At a wedding I went to recently, during his speech, the best man went off on a super-awkward tangent about how he lost his virginity to the bride and how he never would have guessed she'd end up with his best friend (the groom).

grapejam Report

Final score:

150points

POST

DennyS (denzoren) 2 years ago

I'll have things you should never say in public for $200 Alex.

114points

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech 'I can't believe you got her pregnant and haven't told anyone yet.' —(very drunk best man). Whole crowd goes silent enough that you can hear crickets outside; father of the bride's face just goes bright red in rage.

jking11 Report

Final score:

138points

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fire bug 2 years ago

I'm cringing for the guy. Ouch!

47points

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech The best man: 'When you told me that someday I would be your best man, I never thought it would be a half a year later. I just hope you know what you are doing.' They got divorced four months later (they had only been dating a couple months).

Nero29gt Report

Final score:

131points

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Wendy McCallister 2 years ago

Being together a few months means nothing. My husband and I dated long distance for 5 months and are still together 36 years later

66points

#10

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My wife's best friend/maid of honor called me the wrong name in her toast. The name she called out: my wife's ex boyfriend. I laughed it off at the time, but to be honest I was pretty humiliated.

Moto341 Report

Final score:

128points

POST

DennyS (denzoren) 2 years ago

Yeah, that would have cut me deep because my classic overthinking self would wonder if it was a mistake or intentional.

58points

#11

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Was at a wedding where the father of the bride was giving his speech and talked about his daughter's butt and had her stand up and turn around so everyone could see it. He then proceeded to talk about the bride and groom getting it on.

INSadjuster22 Report

Final score:

122points

POST

Nathaniel 2 years ago

Is Donald Trump the father of the bride??

184points

#12

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my brother-in-law's wedding the grandmother of the bride was asked to say grace before the meal. My father and I happened to be standing by the bar after getting one last drink before it closed during the meal. We figured we would stand there during the 30 seconds or so while she blessed the food. She pulls out three pieces of paper, completely full front and back, and starts in on the history of the bride's family. Here is what so-and-so is doing now. When and where everyone has moved into their current homes. Updates on nieces, nephews, cousins' parents, grandparents, everyone. No one knew she was going to get up there and talk for 15+ minutes about people nobody cared about. My dad and I actually finished our drinks and ordered two more by the time she was done. I refer to it as 'The 3 Drink Grace.'

Jesterotr , unsplash.com Report

Final score:

113points

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T. D. Bostick 2 years ago

Get a clue. God already knows all that. I hate it when people pray to the room.

48points

#13

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech This was at my cousin's wedding. My cousin and his buddy had a pact if you will, they would be each other's best men. OK, all well and good, only catch is during their toast they had to MOON the RECEPTION at the end of the speech. So back to cousin's wedding: He is giving his speech, yada yada known this guy forever. Then at the very end he is about to pass the mic back. 'Oh wait, almost forgot.' Sets the mic down, turns around stands on a chair, and moons the wedding reception. Bride's family promptly left. I think my cousin forgot all about that because he looked blindsided. Luckily my side of the family found it hilarious.

Final score:

105points

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Demi Zwaan 2 years ago

Geez, bad sports, the family of the bride. This is just a bit of fun between good friends. No need to be all offended.

45points

#14

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech "This (possibly apocryphal) story was told to me by my friend's wife at the dinner table, as I was very nervously preparing to make a speech at her wedding. I'm not sure how she thought it would help. I was planning to do some edgy enough jokes so, in retrospect, she may have intended it as a warning. Anyway. Some friend of a friend of hers was at a wedding of some people I'll call John and Kate. The best man told a joke:
'After John and Kate's first night together, John told Kate he'd make her breakfast in bed. He reappeared minutes later and presented her with a piece of lettuce on a plate. Kate asked 'Why are you giving me lettuce for breakfast?' To which John replied, 'I wanted to see if you ate like a rabbit too!' According to my friend, Kate took this joke very badly, and her family was extremely offended."

Final score:

102points

POST

WilvanderHeijden 2 years ago

It's poor taste to joke about sex, looks and family during any formal occasion, but especially during weddings where half of the guests are strangers to the other half.

93points

#15

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My brother's best friend (been friends since childhood) gave a speech at his wedding that lasted about five minutes. He said nothing about the bride at all, only mentioned that my brother was a 'good guy,' and then proceeded to talk about his failed marriage (his ex-wife was in attendance), his child custody battle, and how much it pained him to see how happy the newlyweds looked since it brought back memories of his own failed marriage. To top it all, he spoke in a really even, unemotional monotone.

alanaldasweater Report

Final score:

99points

POST

Gina Babe 2 years ago

They picture isn't staged

23points

#16

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my cousin's wedding, one of the groom's best friends gave a short speech that was honestly quite touching, until he stumbled over his words, and said "Well, if these two can get married, uh, anyone can."

[deleted] Report

Final score:

98points

POST

Sofia Gonzalez 2 years ago

Ooh, so close!

27points

#17

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At a friend's wedding the bride's sister gave an excruciatingly awkward speech about how her sister was able to find love before her and she didn't feel complete. It went on for about 5 minutes and she was blubbering and sobbing up a storm. Then she topped it off by singing an off-key song.

notjawn , www.flickr.com Report

Final score:

97points

POST

Iggy 2 years ago

My toes have curled so much, I now have hooves!

60points

#18

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech After stumbling his way through he awkwardly finishes with, 'Sorry man, I'll do better at your next one.' The bride's father pulled him aside and tore him a new one right afterward.

thesarcasmic Report

Final score:

96points

POST

Kynnica Pilupner 2 years ago

I find this one absolutely hilarious

29points

#19

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my father's wedding to his new wife, he mistakenly called his bride by his ex-wife's (my mother's) name during his speech to her.

Tollundmanden , www.pexels.com Report

Final score:

96points

POST

Buren 2 years ago

Rachel?

72points

#20

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech The bride made a speech to thank everyone for coming, but it turned out to be a speech about herself and how amazing she is, nothing about her new husband, she ended up explaining how she always licks her plate clean, then she licked her plate clean in front of 250 people. In her defense she was so drunk she could barely stand. Gotta love working weddings.

candlessmellgood Report

Final score:

93points

POST

SusanS 2 years ago

Do not get drunk at wedding receptions, it is in poor taste. The hosts should never get drunk while hosting - period.

38points

#21

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Groom's father made a speech along the lines of 'we knew she was a keeper when he brought her home and we heard them f**king in the bathroom.' AWK-WARD. Well, everyone pretty much laughed, myself included. The bride on the other hand looked mortified. Like bright red. My table kind of all looked at each other like, this is hysterical, but omg, that's the father of the groom! He was pretty wasted from what I gather.

lizzzellzzz Report

Final score:

92points

POST

Deutschland Mädchen 2 years ago

Perhaps drinks need to be served AFTER all of the speeches

62points

#22

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my sisters wedding the grooms best man was basically airing out the grooms dirty laundry to everyone.

Pro tip: If your speech puts the groom/bride in a negative light, rewrite it. Don't ruin someones happy day.

[deleted] Report

Final score:

88points

POST

WilvanderHeijden 2 years ago

Weddings are supposed to be festive moments. I really don't understand why people would talk shït about groom, bride or family "for fun".

44points

#23

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my sisters wedding, my alcoholic uncle went up and said a couple words.

Them being: "I'm surprised you managed to have a successful wedding, how did this happen without your mom being the over controlling b***h that she is?"

A silence like no other.

socialsmoker , www.flickr.com Report

Final score:

84points

POST

WilvanderHeijden 2 years ago

Kids and drunk people often tell the truth.

38points

#24

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My brother was my best man and told a very touching story about when I was 16 and lied and cheated to skip baseball practice to instead hang out with my girlfriend on the bleachers. I met my wife when I was 18. Thanks, bro.

coderascal , www.flickr.com Report

Final score:

80points

POST

Agnes Jekyll 2 years ago

That is actually the best speech on this list.

26points

#25

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech The best man rifled through all the groom's failed past relationships, in some detail. Then he made fun of the bride and groom for meeting on Christian Mingle or some s**t like that.

It was pretty brutal. Really killed the mood.

wigg1es Report

Final score:

80points

POST

ZAPanda 2 years ago

meeting online isn't really embarrassing?

17points

General_PoopyPants , www.flickr.com Report

#26

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech The best man's speech consisted of him saying "I hope your ups and downs are in bed."

Final score:

76points

POST

DennyS (denzoren) 2 years ago

I don't know why, and I'm assuming its due to crappy movies, that the speech includes sexual references.

22points

#27

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech When my cousin got married, most of the close family knew that the groom had been caught cheating multiple times in the past, but the majority of the people attending did not. During a small speech discussing the marriage counseling he had done with the couple, the priest went on a long rant about the groom's past infidelity and how he was confident it would not happen again. Given how few people in the church knew about the issues, it became very tense.

proto04 Report

Final score:

74points

POST

WilvanderHeijden 2 years ago

That's why it's a bad idea to have a priest as marriage counselor. They don't know what they are talking about and they don't know when to shut up. Living in celibacy means that you aren't qualified to give advice to married people.

55points

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#28

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Best man's speech recounted the tale of when the bride urinated in someone else's shoes under a table.

BinsterUK Report

Final score:

73points

POST

Bored_Groo 2 years ago

That image tho

23points

#29

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Went to my uncle's wedding a while back. His bride had been divorced and chose her family pastor to officiate. The pastor called my uncle her ex-husband's name during the vows multiple times... My family was not happy.

forthis_ Report

Final score:

70points

POST

Steve Fischer 2 years ago

Pastor Flash's Hour of Reckoning

5points

heretical_thoughts Report

#30

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech I went to a wedding where neither family was happy about it. The groom's best man was his younger brother. The best man's toast to the bride was, 'We always thought groom would marry XX (points to woman at the back), but here we are, so bride, welcome to the family'...
...Both the groom and XX were former housemates of mine, and had been in a long relationship. I kinda thought they'd end up together too. Bride and groom moved in with her parents. Groom stopped talking to his friends. XX married someone else, left the country. I haven't heard from either of them even once this century.

Final score:

65points

POST

Dani Alexander 2 years ago

Brutal

16points

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

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#31

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Fundie wedding two years ago. The minister took the opportunity to make a 45-minute sermon, said 'obey' many times. He stressed over and over again that the bride will never have a will of her own again. She was just a rib to the man she was now bound to. Father of the bride then had his speech. He gave a long-winded telling of the disgruntled ex-coworker's shooting spree in the hospital. He told about his wife locking the door and hiding. He gave coroners' reports of where people were shot and how one person that had been shot in the head had played possum, then called the police. The father of the bride wasn't even there, but this shootout seemed to be the best thing that ever happened to him. He just showed way too much enthusiasm. Then to finish, he mentioned that the groom was the extra security hired after the incident and met his phlebotomist daughter. Then the testimonials began...
...The bulk was: It WILL get worse. Just get stronger with Jesus. Nobody shared stories of growing together and the adventure of raising a family. Nope, none of that. Life is over as you do your duty. It was like a eulogy.

DarrenEdwards Report

Final score:

29points

POST

Tamra Stiffler 2 years ago

Good grief. I insisted that all the "obey" BS be removed from our vows.

27points

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

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#32

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my brother's wedding I accidentally said his ex wife's name during my best man speech. They both laughed and took it well but I was 1000% mortified.

level 2 [deleted] , www.flickr.com Report

Final score:

28points

POST

T. D. Bostick 2 years ago

I think this guy was mentioned above somewhere.

8points

#33

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech The parents of the groom stood up there for their speech and went through each age (he is 30) and read blurbs from his report card. The speech itself was insanely long. At the end of it, they asked their son to please come back to their church.

Final score:

25points

POST

WilvanderHeijden 2 years ago

"They asked their son to please come back to their church." I'm quite sure that he had plenty of good reasons to leave the church.

10points

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

#34

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech There is a tradition in some circles where the best man's speech "roasts" the groom. A well-done roast follows a cycle of build-him-up-and-knock-him-down, but I was at a wedding where the best man just basically insulted the groom for 10-15 minutes. After the first couple minutes, the discomfort in the audience was palpable...the laughs turned into polite chuckles and then into just silence.

To make things worse, he had printed out his speech using a ridiculously tiny font, and kept losing his place. By the time the fourth or fifth pause came around someone actually shouted out "just say 'cheers' and shut up already!", but sadly the speech continued.

(I found out later that the groom was so pissed off by the whole thing that he didn't speak to the best man for a several months after that.)

five_argyle_sox Report

Final score:

23points

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#35

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech A friend was getting married, and the best man decided that in his toast he would try to compliment how beautiful the bride was. He ended up saying "It took a team of bridesmaids and scientists to get her looking like that." Nice try, really awkward.

Wheresalltherumgone , unsplash.com Report

Final score:

23points

POST

Persp Gold 2 years ago

this is messed up

0points

#36

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech A couple years ago, my fiancé's best friend got married. He and two others were the best men, but only two of them had decided to say something, fiancé being one of them. Anyway, he gets up and tells a funny story about the groom being so nervous about the first date. Then, the second guy gets up and whips out a good 30 index cards, and not the normal small index cards, oh no, the big ones...
...We stood there for a good 25 minutes while this guy took us through every little detail of the groom and his friendship... We had to hear about them meeting for the first time as lifeguards, then them playing video games, complete with what video games and a play-by-play of what happened in said video games. It was the worst speech. Finally the DJ started playing music to get him to stop — the kid still had about 10 more cards to go.

ImCreeptastic Report

Final score:

20points

POST

WilvanderHeijden 2 years ago

Just a case of bad planning. You can ask anyone to speech, but you also set the boundaries about content, language and duration of the speech. And if you have to fear the worst, you can tell people not to speech.

5points

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#37

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My dad is a really funny and loving man, but he is not a good public speaker. When my younger sister got married a few years ago he gave this rambling speech about how she was a "plane that just taxied on the runway forever and you wondered if it would ever take off". He was trying to say she was a late bloomer I think, but he made the hand motion of a plane just going on the runway and never taking off. We gave him a ton of s**t for that, because he essentially told everyone at the wedding that he didn't think she "blossomed" until she met her husband who is the life of the party. So on to my wedding a few months ago... I told him that after my sister's speech, he really needed to step up his game. I said this all jokingly, because I was so sure he got enough hell for his first speech that he'd put a lot more effort into mine. Nope. He told everyone that he thought I was autistic when I was young and ended it by saying "but I don't think she turned out to be". I spent the rest of my wedding night fake laughing at everyone's autism jokes. Thanks Dad.

TLDR: Dad called my sister a plane that never took off and called me autistic. Love you Dad!

PsychTest Report

Final score:

19points

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T. D. Bostick 2 years ago

Why even let him give a second speech?

19points

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#38

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Best man got pretty lit before the speech and goes off-script and tells a lighthearted funny story about how the groom bet him $20 he wouldn't s**t his pants at the strip club while he was getting a lap dance. Long story short, he did s**t his pants, and then one of the groomsman took his mic away in a move straight out of Old School.

thesarcasmic Report

Final score:

19points

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T. D. Bostick 2 years ago

Ah, that Old School wedding speech was pretty hilarious, too!

2points

#39

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My wedding.....

We didn't really plan speeches, but we knew the family wanted to do some. So my husbands brother (best man) did one, it was funny, he was 18 at the time, so it was pretty good. Very heartfelt. His little sisters did one, they were 9 and 21. Really nice, wedding appropriate, and short. Both our parents did one. His was nice, and mine did a great job. Like the others, nice, heartfelt, and they kept it light and fun. Well......my sisters were bridesmaids, one the maid of honor, the other a bridesmaid. They were 22 and 26. The speech starts fun, a couple jokes....then in turned into a 15 minute speech about them. How, it was a battle over the maid of honor position, or who was the better sister, or who they thought would have gotten married first and so on. The speech was essentially about them. Nothing mentioned about me, or my husband (cause you know, we were the ones getting married) or the day, just them. I could see people cringing. I cringed, my parents cringed, everyone did... I was just glad when it was done.

_northernlights , www.flickr.com Report

Final score:

19points

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ZAPanda 2 years ago

let me guess: they're "influencers" ?

6points

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#40

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Went to a wedding where bride's dad was sick with cancer. He also hadn't been a great dad to her (wasn't around when she was growing up, never paid child support despite having lots of money). The father of the bride's wife (think evil stepmother) made a super long speech about how great he was as a dad and how strong he was for battling cancer, etc. She never said anything about the bride or groom just made a toast to thank father of the bride for everything he has done/ gone through. It was so inappropriate & awkward to make it about him not the bride & groom. Stepmom was also a huge factor in separating father & daughter throughout her life.

peanut_shell , www.pexels.com Report

Final score:

19points

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Incitatus 2 years ago

*cringe*

4points

#41

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At my cousin's wedding, her boss got wasted and told a story about her nephew watching p**n in a hotel on a family trip. It came out of nowhere and everyone was sufficiently confused and uncomfortable. I was young and someone had made the mistake of serving me wine, so I just laughed and laughed in the otherwise silent room. They had to turn off the mic and then just closed the speeches for the rest of the night.

squashsoup Report

Final score:

18points

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#42

We recently attended the wedding of one of my wife's cousins.

We had never met the groom before and the cousin isn't at family functions very much, so we didn't know what to expect.

Three best men each gave a speech.

Each speech involved both the bride and groom being drunk.

I thought I had stumbled into a surprise intervention.

As an aside, the groom immediately shotgunned two beers as soon as the ceremony was over...in the church parking lot.

Val_Hallen Report

Final score:

18points

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ZAPanda 2 years ago

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level 1 [deleted] , www.pexels.com Report

#43

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At one of my best friends' weddings, I was a bridesmaid, and my friend (the groom), asked me to double check one of his groomsmen's speeches as he was afraid that he'd say something that the bride wouldn't approve of. His speech was actually pretty decent, I helped him with a few things (like he repeated himself a lot, so I helped him fix that, and he said something that could have been interpreted as an insult to the bride, [but wasn't intended as such] and I helped him rephrase it so it sounded nice).

Now the worst speech, it wasn't from the groomsman I helped, the groomsman that the groom was worried about... no, that would have been too easy, too preventable. No, the worst speech came from the best man. Why? Because he didn't write anything, or even really think about it before hand, he figured "how hard can writing a speech be? I'll just improvise"

His speech ended up being a slur of: "You guys are good together"s and "I hope you guys last forever"s mixed in with many, many "um"s and "uh"s. It was honestly embarrassing to listen to, and it went on for probably a good 2-3 minutes. I'm pretty sure everyone in attendance was communally cringing in empathetic embarrassment.

The groomsman I was told to watch over then gave his speech, which ended with everyone applauding (though it might just have been the contrast they were applauding...). As I said, his speech was actually pretty good before my intervening, clearly the groom had me editing the wrong person...

Cerenitee , unsplash.com Report

Final score:

17points

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#44

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech I was the best man at me Brothers wedding and I knocked the whole toast thing out of the park. I wrote this bit about him always being full of surprises and getting himself in trouble, just to make him sweat a bit, but I only mentioned the stuff everybody else already knew, nothing that was really bad or still a secret that I've heard about his fraternity days.

Later that evening after the drinks have been pouring one of his frat brother grooms men decided he got to give a speech as well. He decided to continue where I left off and recall stories that I willingly left out, stories of ex-girlfriends, run ins with campus law enforcement, and the like.

Thankfully most of the family had left by that time.

Final score:

17points

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Incitatus 2 years ago

After "me brothers," anyone else read this in a Scottish accent?

16points

#45

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech At one wedding reception I attended, the bride's teenaged sister gave the first speech. It was a twenty-minute crying jag about how mature her older sister was for "waiting until she had married the man she loved," and how wise she was for not having sex with the first guy who crossed her path. Confessional toasts are never a good idea. Especially in front of your grandparents.

wavesofgraceb , www.flickr.com Report

Final score:

15points

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ZAPanda 2 years ago

yeah but how do you think your grandparents got to be grandparents if they didn't have sex? I mean really... you'd be surprised what naughty buggers they were if you actually ask them.

5points

#46

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech I was best man at my dad's second wedding, which I thought was a little weird but there was about a 5 second moment as I was walking up to the podium where it hit me hard how profoundly weird it was to give a best man's speech for your dad. I was silent for a few seconds as I looked around like "What the heck is going on?"

Looked down at my script and the performer in me came out, but those couple of seconds really stuck with me.

Zeruvi Report

Final score:

14points

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#47

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My aunt got married to a guy who tends to get really nervous in front of big crowds, and when the wedding officiant was having them repeat the vows, it took him like 20 tries because he kept stuttering and/or saying complete opposite words. He actually said "I _________, take you to be my lawfully wedded husband, uh, uh, uh, husb... Uh, wife?"

RoosterShield , www.pexels.com Report

Final score:

13points

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Incitatus 2 years ago

Aww, kinda sweet.

8points

#48

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech Best man gave the most redneck speech ever at the most redneck wedding ever and included the fact that most of the groomsmen hadn't liked the bride when they met her and the funny time the groom and him got h*****s.

8349932 , www.flickr.com Report

Final score:

8points

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T. D. Bostick 2 years ago

Bored Panda bleeping words nobody even knows are bad.

5points

#49

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech "I'm not a man of many words, so I'll just say - thanks for coming and good luck to the happy couple"

Father of the bride. I cringed a little inside. I can understand people who don't like to do speeches (I'm one of them), but on your only daughter's wedding day, I felt a little more than that could have been said!

EasyTigrr , www.pexels.com Report

Final score:

7points

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Auntriarch 2 years ago

Sounds good to me.

13points

#50

30 People Who Did Not Have A Good Time At A Wedding Because Of A Horrible Speech My wife's friend got married two weeks ago, and the maid of honor said "ablutely" instead of "absolutely." She also said that she was "excited," but pronounced it as "ek-SKY-ted." I couldn't believe it...

level 1 [deleted] Report

Final score:

-13points

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Naesil 2 years ago

Oh the horror! someone mispronounced a word when giving a speech. /s

7points

Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

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Gabija is a photo editor at Bored Panda. Before joining the team, she achieved a Professional Bachelor degree in Photography and has been working as a freelance photographer since. She also has a special place in her heart for film photography, movies and nature.

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What do you think ?

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Demi Zwaan 2 years ago

Ok, so what can we learn from this? Don't serve drinks before speeches, to make sure no one is drunk yet. Only have people you trust give speeches and even then, have someone else you trust read over them first. Or read the speeches yourself, if you don't really trust anyone. Also, have the band/DJ be ready to play really loud music when you give a certain signal and have someone who makes the speech giver sit down when that happens.

12points

Bob Euker 2 years ago

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Agnes Jekyll 2 years ago

You're there to cheer them on, wish them well, celebrate and say something that makes the crowd go, "awww." Tonight is not the night to end a friendship or put a damper on the day.

6points

SusanS 2 years ago

I have been to dozens of weddings, and the longest toast was along the lines of Happiness to the bride and groom. There were no speeches. When did that become a thing?? No one wants to listen to a speech - literally NO ONE. It is in extremely poor taste to get drunk at a wedding reception, and the bride and groom should never under any circumstances get drunk.

4points

Bob Euker 2 years ago

Question: Is that your ideal wedding or theirs?

3points

K Witmer 2 years ago

At my wedding we purposely looked for a minister to say the most basic vows and do the ceremony quickly wo fuss. We discussed this w the man we found and he agreed. The day of he went off on a tangent trying to be funny and my mom who was always very outspoken started clapping her hands and yelling ok move along we're finished now. It was so funny and I'm glad she did it. Good memory of my mom.

3points

Annette Easton 2 years ago

I was at a wedding once where the very nervous father of the bride gave a speech where he intended to say something about "my first daughter's wedding" (because he has more than one daughter). Instead he said "my daughter's first wedding".

3points

Smitin 2 years ago

My uncle's ex-girlfriend sent him a sympathy card on the day he married my aunt.

2points

Conor Gilmartin 2 years ago

Last October we attended an absolutely awful wedding. It was definitely the groom’s big day; everything was tailored to his whims (including pimp-rolling to the front with his three attendants) and the bride got hardly a mention during the service, which even included a reading from the Satanic bible! During the speeches, the FOTB looked at her as though they’d never met, and fumbled his way through trying to find (or seemingly make up on the spot) something nice to say about her. Truly embarrassing! The groom’s speech was largely about himself, dissing members of the family, and some a**l and 69 jokes made at the bride’s expense (in front of her parents). The best man’s speech included a tale about how the groom had gone to f**k a wh*re while in Amsterdam but got fleeced out of €100 by her pimp, and then how the groom and the ring-bearer mislaid some drugs on the way home and were worried about getting arrested at customs. Worst wedding I have ever attended in my entire life.

2points

LynzCatastrophe 2 years ago (edited)

This just painfully reminded me that I'm the maid of honour at my sisters wedding coming up. I have to give a speech?! Is not doing one an option?! Can I outsource this job?!!!?

1point

BJames 2 years ago

A 10 second toast is all anybody wants to hear, and even that is optional unless your sister is bridezilla

0points

Huddo's sister 2 years ago

My friend's wedding, she was reluctant about having her father do a speech. He had been known to give long rambling speeches as grace before meals. This included before dinner at my friend's 14th birthday where he talked for almost 20 minutes and most of the guest were only meeting him for the first time and weren't Christian! He promised not to do this so she gave in and let him speak at the reception. As you can guess it did not go well. He talked for about half an hour about the sanctity of marriage and how sex before marriage was offensive to God (they had been living together for 2-3 years) and how being gay was also unchristian (the groom's mother was gay, and not Christian anyway) and he hoped they would live up to their Christian responsibilities. My friend sat there in shock and humiliation the whole speech nut was on the brink of tears when it ended. The best man spoke next and got everyone laughing thankfully. Her dad wasn't even invited to her second wedding!

1point

Queen Jackson. 2 years ago

Damn.

1point

Monkey Spunk 2 years ago

Well I was married by a homophobe, I didn't know it at the time but she made the National Press shortly afterwards when gay weddings became legal and she refused to do them "because they are against God's will".

1point

Emmett O'Brian 2 years ago

I gave a wedding speech once. In Klingon. I didn't think to record it. A friend pulled out their phone and got the second half of it but people ask me what I said and I only remember the main ideas. My pronunciation was probably poor anyway.

0points

Fred L. 2 years ago

At least Rowan Atkinson managed to make it funny ...

0points

Ines Olabarria-Smith 2 years ago

So thankful that’s not a thing here.

0points

POST

Demi Zwaan 2 years ago

12points

Bob Euker 2 years ago

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Agnes Jekyll 2 years ago

You're there to cheer them on, wish them well, celebrate and say something that makes the crowd go, "awww." Tonight is not the night to end a friendship or put a damper on the day.

6points

SusanS 2 years ago

4points

Bob Euker 2 years ago

Question: Is that your ideal wedding or theirs?

3points

K Witmer 2 years ago

3points

Annette Easton 2 years ago

3points

Smitin 2 years ago

My uncle's ex-girlfriend sent him a sympathy card on the day he married my aunt.

2points

Conor Gilmartin 2 years ago

2points

LynzCatastrophe 2 years ago (edited)

This just painfully reminded me that I'm the maid of honour at my sisters wedding coming up. I have to give a speech?! Is not doing one an option?! Can I outsource this job?!!!?

1point

BJames 2 years ago

A 10 second toast is all anybody wants to hear, and even that is optional unless your sister is bridezilla

0points