“You Lesbians Get Crazier And Crazier”: 30 Coworkers Who Didn’t Think Before Speaking
InterviewWith a 2023 survey of 5,902 Americans, the Pew Research Center reinforced the idea that workplace relationships play a major role in our overall satisfaction with our jobs.
That means even if employees aren't entirely happy with their salary, workload, or career opportunities, the people around them can still make their days at the office worthwhile.
At the same time, however, unnecessary drama, lack of support, and just poor communication in general can overshadow all the positive aspects of the job and significantly reduce employee happiness.
So in an attempt to remind ourselves to stay aware of each other, let's take a look at a recent online discussion. It started when Reddit user Puzzleheaded_Eye8358 asked everyone on the platform to share the craziest and most inappropriate things a colleague has said to them in the workplace.
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I started a new job and I told my hiring manager that I preferred the men’s uniform shirts to the women’s (polo style)
I didn’t give my reasoning but for the sake of any readers this was because; there were buttons on the placket for the mens whereas the women’s were open not even just the normal placket without buttons either, it was a ‘V’ neckline on a polo shirt that was deep enough to show an uncomfortable amount of cleavage (my chest could be described as bountiful) and the length if the men’s were reasonable and didn’t have unnecessary princess seams to make it tighter or a cropped bottom that prevented tucking (I prefer to tuck my work shirts)
The hiring manager responded “you lesbians get crazier and crazier, already wearing pants now you can’t even wear the shirts designed for you??”
I thanked him for his time and walked down to HR (where I had just received my office access card) insisted that I do an exit interview with the lovely lady in the office and then I dropped my shiny new access card and walked away. I had received another job offer the day prior thankfully that I hadn’t responded to yet. Best snap decision I have ever made. I have worked with that company and an amazing team of people for the past seven years now.
A coworker tried to compliment me on being “one of the good immigrants who did it correctly” … I was born and raised in the US.
Thank you for being "one of the good" racists who makes their ignorant and unwanted racial comments into sorta-compliments
We got in touch with Puzzleheaded_Eye8358 and they were kind enough to tell us more about their now-viral post.
"I came up with the idea to ask Reddit this question when I was speaking with my husband about my past work incident," they told Bored Panda. "I wanted to see what others had to say about their own experiences."
"Girl Scouts is a faith-based organization."
It absolutely is f*****g NOT. Girl Scouts is for everyone. Religion is not involved and should not be involved. Literally anyone who has ever worked for any Girl Scout council for more than two minutes should know that.
Long story short, this is how she tried to justify having us pray to Jesus Christ Our Lord And Savior IN STAFF MEETINGS. And then *that* is how the vice president of HR had to drive across the state of Georgia to physically visit every council office and have a meeting about how you really, really cannot do that. Because I dimed that s**t immediately. Don't f**k with my Girl Scouts.
Girl Scouts had a religious component in the beginning and still held with the pledge, although which God was meant in the pledge can be open to interpretation. Still not a reason for prayer in staff meetings.
There is _never_ a valid reason for prayer in staff meetings.
Load More Replies...As a Brownie, Daisy and Girl Scout who is Native American, Buddhist and doesn't align with a single faith but a combination of several, I thank you with my whole heart.
We've seen what religion and cis hetero males did in the boy scouts.
There definitely was a time when Jewish girls were not allowed in the Girl Scouts- which is how you got Campfire Girls
Sing around the camp fire. Join the Campfire Girls.
Load More Replies...Perhaps confusion with the Boy Scouts. The Boy Scout not that long ago justified their then anti-gay policies in court by maintaining that it was a religious organization and was allowed to exclude gays as part of their faith. And the court ruled in their favor. I believe that BSA has since backed way up from that position.
They also removed "Boy" from their name and is just Scouts now (they allow girls, which made Girl Scouts try and sue them lmao)
Load More Replies...When Is was in Elementary school I was in an group through our church called Pioneer Girls. That was a religious organization. Later on I was in Girl Scouts which had no religious component. My grandkids are now Girl Scouts and neither my daughter nor I would WANT them in a religious group. It seems to be shoved down our throats these days under the guise of "religious freedom", which is very far from free
It's not faith-based but it still attracts the faith-based crazies
Particularly in Utah. Lds specifically. Almost every mission announcement mentions the kid is an eagle scout and they are more connected than they should be.
Load More Replies...Huh, the fact that our troop leaders forced everyone to recite the Lord's Prayer despite their own religion and teh regional council said that was a-ok made me think otherwise
"Oh, you want me to pray to Jesus? Fine." [completely calmly, maybe even sweetly, throughout] "Jesus, you random Jewish guy from 2000 years ago, I pray, show this idiot that she's doing basically the opposite of your teachings. That you preached tolerance towards those who were different. Or, if you didn't, if you preached hate, antisemitism, homophobia, and all the other things that people say you want, that's okay too. And with all due respect, f**k you, f**k your idiotic scumbag self, go to hell, do you realize how much suffering you've caused, do you realize any of that, you self-righteous idiot, you are a despicable excuse for a savior! Or, if you couldn't understand that - makes sense, you would've spoken Aramaic or Hebrew or something - please tell her this: Al gemilut hasadim haolam omed." [The world stands on lovingkindness]. Then: "You're lucky you specified Jesus, otherwise I would have done all the prayers I could find-Buddhist, Sikh, Jewish, Muslim, Hindu, whatever."
Here is the 1960s middle school wiseass version of the Boy Scout Oath: "On my honor I will do my best / To smoke cigars and cigarettes / And help the Girl Scouts get undressed" Sorry, I don't make the news, I just report it.
Well it was when I went to join in the early 80s. You had to swear aligence to God, I wouldn't as I didn't believe in God. I'm UK
Huh, in Canada, the Promise is 'I promise to do my best, to be true to myself, my beliefs, and Canada. I will take action for a better world and uphold the Guiding law.' So it's more inclusive and vague, and you can chose to ignore anything about religion. (Not all beliefs are religious ones)
Load More Replies...I have been a girl scout my whole life. I have never gone to church and look down on those who flaunt their religion. I'm not even Christian.
That person should go visit the Pioneer girls. They'll happily take her in.
Boy Scouts is a religious organization. Not a Christian one, but a religious one.
Yeahhhh when I was a Boy Scout in the 90s, we had to pray before and after.
The last sentence would also suggest a need for a criminal investigation...
There's a reason BP (and other publications) bleep out certain words: they're inappropriate. I hope an adult would not use such words to or in front of scouts of any gender, or in schools, etc. If your kid's teacher, principal, scout leader, etc spoke to your kid this way, you'd likely complain or sue. Surely you can find better ways to express your thoughts and feelings. This language use gets an automatic downvote, no matter how much I might agree with the sentiment.
“You shouldn’t wear that lipstick, it makes me want to kiss you. You shouldn’t wear that dress.”
Then, when he caught me in the stairwell “can I kiss you?”
He was in his 50s. I was in my 20s. I wanted to vomit.
"You shouldn't speak to me like that...makes me want to punch you.".
Puzzleheaded_Eye8358 said that, after going through the thread, the main recurring theme they've noticed was, unfortunately, sexual harassment.
This is a stark reminder that despite advancements in creating a more inclusive professional culture, some issues continue to persist. In fact, recruitment company CareerWallet found in a recent survey that 24% of women experience inappropriate comments in the workplace (or remotely) from managers and colleagues — more than double the figure for men.
I was 28 or 29, and a man commented on how I should get married and have kids soon because I was “running out of time”
I f*****g hated that guy.
During a staff meeting my boss told me that we could all be replaced by trained monkeys. It was one of those meetings where one person had royally fu##ked up, but they chose to punish everyone. I told my boss that if she could find a monkey with a Masters Degree in microbiology, so that she could meet regulatory requirements, to go right ahead. She shut the f#ck up.
"I believe that having a filter is very important, especially at work," Puzzleheaded_Eye8358 added. "Just because something pops into your mind does not mean you should say it."
"We are all adults and professionals. Let's act like that and treat each other with respect. We never know what people are going through, so work should be a safe space for everyone."
I was all of 18 and working at a STATE AGENCY. After months of sexual harassment, I resigned. In my last couple of weeks, one of the officers said, “You know we’re going to make love at least once before you leave, right?”.
Dispatched for a towing company for almost as a decade. Had a particularly useless driver come in and describe his last customer as a “fat n***er b***h.” Told him to never talk to me again and reported him to management.
Wasn’t even the last time a driver used that word in front of me. I knew I was out of place as a liberal, but goddamn.
Management should realize that he's probably pretty clearly signaling his hostility to the customers as well as his co-workers.
Amy Gallo, who is a contributing editor at Harvard Business Review, cohost of the Women at Work podcast, and the author of the book Getting Along: How to Work with Anyone (Even Difficult People), said that regardless of whether the person meant to be rude, our emotional reaction in these situations is valid.
When we're deciding how to react, it's important to remember that "we often focus on the risks of actions, our minds going directly to the worst-case scenario, rather than the downsides of not doing something," Gallo said. "So take time to consider the risks of not speaking up as well."
Perhaps not addressing the behavior would violate our personal values or the cultural norms we stand for. We might inadvertently condone the comment if we let it pass or miss an opportunity to help the person understand how their words impact others.
Spent a lot of time communicating with clients over the phone. I was also the only woman in the office, and the youngest by about 20 years. Never saw clients in person. Boss met up with said clients at dinner, then reported back the next day, in front of several coworkers, that they said I had a "sexy voice" and that they wanted to know if I was "hot".
I'm pretty sure my Boomer boss thought I'd be flattered. When I replied with "oh, and what did you tell them?" he realised that he was in trouble. Whether it was because he realised that it was inappropriate, or because I am very overweight (i.e. not hot) and he may have said that I wasn't, I don't know. But he immediately dropped the conversation.
(My coworkers had my back, at least two of them tore shreds off him for being "gross").
Older guy that I had trained. He was a complainer, but mostly competent so we tuned it out. He grew up in a local neighborhood and was proud of it.
A new company doctor was introduced, and I went to the presentation, talked a bit to her. Nice lady, seemed competent. Asian heritage.
And old dude, upon hearing her name, said “Oh no. I bet she has a terrible accent.”
Looking him in the eyes, I said “Yeah, it’s really hard to understand her. She grew up in your neighborhood.”
Old guy blushed and suddenly went to get coffee. Our other team member was dying trying to suppress his laughter….
At my last job I had a co-worker tell me she thought she had herpes. Then proceeded to show me pictures of her bits with the symptoms. This was while we were on our lunch break…eating our lunch.
I used to have a federal job and my supervisor thought it was a good idea to ask me who I voted for in the general election. When I refused, she said she deserved to know, and then I hung up on her. I immediately called a colleague, and there would be a record of her wildly inappropriate question. The next day, she called me in a panic, claiming that her foot hurt, and that was the reason why she asked.
Not seeing the connection between a sore foot and wanting to know another person's voting record
“Wow, you lost a lot of weight, but at least you kept your tits!”
My two bosses (male and female) laughed when I told them.
I’m black (West Indian black. Not African. There’s a difference) and I was sitting in my office minding my business one day. Our chief financial officer came in during December and screeched “Happy Kwanzaa!!!” I pretended not to hear her. In an effort to make her uncomfortable, which it did. She then said my name, and I was like…what do you mean? She said, “don’t you celebrate Kwanzaa?” I replied, “I never have…didn’t even know that was going on.” And she turned super red and said “oh my gosh I’m sorry!”
I was like, “ok…I’m gonna get back to work now.”.
In 1987 I worked as a receptionist and word processor ~ yes that was what secretary was called at the time ~ for a title company that employed 4/5 guys that were a few years older than me. I answered phones and typed up contracts and made copies of legal documents, The owners were 3 middle aged men with wives and children and the rest of the employees were single men in their late 20’s.
Within 6 weeks of working there I was groped, “joked with”, hit on, talked lewd too, told I smelled like I just had sex, told I could make extra money as a stripper at at well known strip club if I lost some weight first, followed into the bathroom and asked to cover for each of them when their side girls called. They would openly talk about their sexual conquests and discuss who had herpes which at the time was a major big deal and topic of conversation.
I finally got the guts to complain in tears to one of the bosses who seemed horrified of the things I was telling him at the time. He assured me he would do something about it and apologized profusely. That was a Friday, he told me to take off the rest of the day and Monday since I was so upset and he would handle it. I was so hopeful and relieved I remember thinking that I would be able to come to work the next week and not worry about what I was going to have to deal with.
On the following Tuesday I came in to the office eager to get on the right foot and found my desk empty. My stuff was in a box in the break room. Seems I was temporarily reassigned. Also I found out that on after I left on Friday he had called in the jerks all together and they as a group did not deny their behavior but claimed that because I had laughed at the time and not complained when it the events happened that I was as much to blame and therefore couldn’t work with them. By the next day I was replaced and by Friday, my position had been eliminated.
I was once partnered with a colleague one shift and this was a day after me and my ex had broken up rather messily. It came up in conversation and then he decided it was appropriate to ask if he could buy nudes off me since I'm single now.
Guh. All these comments women are reporting...it just straight sucks. Every. Woman. Has. These. Stories. Your mom. Your wife. Your friends. Your cousin. You're best friends mom who raised you like their own. We STILL have to deal with these. And knowing it's probably not going to change for my friends daughters just makes me physically ill.
A coworker sent me an unsolicited picture of her hemorrhoid that was causing her to miss work. We didn’t work in the same office. I had no idea she was missing work.
When ordering uniforms, I told the assistant FOH mgr I needed a size 8 pants. He said he didn’t know they made sizes that big. I felt great after that one.
I used to work out in the chemical plants so the "worst" thing said to me was sexual harassment.
Dude offered to help me in the restroom. He was more graphic but I'll let you use your imagination.
The good thing that came from that was I saw how many people I worked with and around that said it was unacceptable. They helped me file complaints and protected me till he was run off.
Former Director of the Lake Erie Research Center told me I was stupid and crazy for being pregnant. Then she regaled me with her stories of when she did research while she was pregnant. But that was different because it was her and she’s special.
Did I mention she is no longer the director?
When I was in retail, less than 10 minutes after meeting a new manager, she was telling me about her awful period, her marital problems and crying. I handed her tissues and prayed for either customers or for her to stop.
Former boss insisted she talk about how her daughter should be free of s.a. charges....while we were at work...with customers listening... B*tch, I'm being paid minimum wage to stock shelves. Definitely not enough to be a therapist.
This happened to a friend of mine at her old job, where her manager said to her: "I prefer you to call me 'sir' when we're in bed".
I worked at DG. Guy came in drunk all the time. Bar was next door and we were used to his s**t.
He came in one night with his daughter and grand daughter, so he was in his late 50’s for sure. He was older than me by like 30 years. He asked me to come help them find the jello. As soon as I got over there, he put his arm around my waist, and started saying dirty things to me. I don’t even remember what he said.
I stepped back and said I had a gf, wasn’t interested. I don’t fight or flight, I freeze. And he said he could change my mind.
My manager the next day told me to be more assertive… and that I liked the attention… yeah, thanks.
Store manager said I could ban him myself. She was way better. I got to two days later and he said he could persuade my boss to let him return. I said if he came back, I would call the police.
Felt good banning him.
I'm starting to get feisty and fighty on some of these peoples behalves...
One of the dishwashers st the restaurant I was a manager of had convinced himself he was in love with me. He would tell me I was pretty, so funny, etc. Didn't think it was a big deal, as it never seemed threatening. Around Christmas one year, he gave me a "gift" of lace underwear, a box of chocolates & attempted to kiss me (which I did not allow to happen). I let him know it was extremely inappropriate & he should not be doing that to anyone in the workplace He then told me he would quit so that we could be together (idk what reality he was in) & I pretty much assumed he wouldnt be getting the point then or ever. I let HR know, and he got fired immediately.
Lol a coworker said that it is isn't possible to be discriminated since we weren't in the South 🤣.
My boss told me if a black woman has a PhD then she is now apart the privilege class and her race and upbringing didn't matter anymore 🫠.
I'm so glad I quit last week. This was at a state university where my first supervisor referred to me as a beaner...
A little concerned to ask since the rest doesn’t give me any hope at all, but just to be clear, what is a ‘beaner’ in this context?
The person who trained me at my current position once asked, “You don’t change your own oil? Did your dad walk out on your family when you were little or something?”.
True or not, I'd break down crying and say "YES! YES he did! He said he was just going for cigarettes, but he never came back! My Mom had already died, so it was just me and my little sister in the house alone. I was 8 years old! Becky ... oh, god, Becky didn't make it. I was so hungry ..."
About 8 months pregnant with my first kid, co-worker said " You sure there's only one baby in there??"
Am fat but ffs, not something you say to a preggo.
Second was an interview, guy asked me if I was planning on having anymore kids. Lmao, not illegal but hugely inappropriate.
In my first job in my 20’s, the man I worked for came in one morning and told me “I had a dream about you last night. But I can’t tell you about it” I was thoroughly grossed out and didn’t ask. Another time he had me help him find three hidden files on his computer. They were [adult videos]. He was married with three kids and a pillar of the community. I was so glad when I was able to quit.
If he was considered a pillar to the community then I hope that community crumbled.
My first full-time job I worked with an older lady who was a pain in the a*s and had no filter - I was a few months pregnant at the time and had really bad morning sickness, so the smart thing for her to do was accuse me of being anorexic (yes, you read that right, anorexic) bc there were times in the morning she could hear me in the employee's bathroom. "Um, that's not anorexicia..." "yes it is, I hear you puking in the morning!!!" I did manage to make her life miserable a year or two later when I quit to go to a much better job - apparently bc of that she "couldn't" retire and so she was pissed at me 😅 (she didn't want to leave them short handed 🙄).
' (she didn't want to leave them short handed 🙄).' Why would you make your employer being short staffed if you retire your problem?! How utterly silly!
Same company, 2 different incidents, 2 different managers:
1) Female manager asked if I would let her kiss me
2) Male manager, while on a business trip and driving a rental car, lights up a joint, takes a hit, and asks me if I want some.
Was not interested in either.
When anyone makes a bad sexual or racist joke, just say, "I don't get it. Explain it to me." And they usually figure out it's not so funny. You could probably use the line with unwanted flirting or come-ons. The first time I broke that out, it was freeing!
I was SO disgusted reading these that I was REALLY tempted to quit reading, but I felt in a way I owed it to the people who were telling their stories to actually READ their stories. I'm SO sad for the people who go through this. I really had no idea so many people have so many problems like this. It's shocking, disgusting and infuriating.
In future, it's ok if you need to stop. You don't have any moral obligation to read a stranger's disturbing stories. It's unhealthy to put that kind of unnecessary "responsibility" on yourself when there's no real reason to do so. The popular phrase right now is "Don't set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm" but in your case, it would be "Don't set yourself on fire out in the middle of nowhere, just in case someone stops by who might or might not need the warmth." You're allowed to protect yourself.
Load More Replies...So many of these people are the reason I have to watch 2 hours worth of videos every year.
Word of advice. Stay out of Oklahoma. I'd leave if I could afford it.
Not a co-worker, but my old boss. I was doing all of the manual labour, lifting heavy objects, going outside in the blazing summer heat, receiving deliveries, building light fixtures, cleaning the bathrooms, climbing up the ladder to reach high up stock, and even vacuuming the boss's minivan (during work hours, btw), and I was visibly sweating. My arsehole of a boss comes over and said I stink, and asked me if I even showered. I was honestly very tempted to quit then and there when he said that.
One of the mechanics where I work was calling me frigid because I wouldn't have sex with him. He no longer works there.
It wasn't said directly to me but I was around. I'm from Texas so unfortunately im no stranger to people's racist c**p but one the most racist things I've ever heard came from a guy from New York City. Years ago I worked at a pizza place run by a family. The guy who founded it was originally from NYC in the 50s/60s. He told one of my coworkers, a black kid around 15, that when he was growing up in NYC he and his friends always carried a knife and a strait razor for fights. They had both because according to him, you had to have a razor for fights with black guys because their skin is to thick and knives wouldn't cut them right. His son who was running the business banned his dad from coming into the store after that.
Had a person complain to HR that her manager was agist. Manager was the same age she was. And was not. Same person later filed one that she had been racially discriminated because she hadn't been hired for a job that she had no experience for and hadn't even applied for
I/we have had several students screaming that we are racist when they don't get the grade they want.
Load More Replies...When I was 15 I had a job in a fish & chip shop. Boss grabbed my a*s, I almost threw the fry basket at him, walked out there told him he was a gross okd man in front of a shop full of people. And my bad, at 17 I made a throw away comment about a co worker chatting to a guy. I said to another colleague that she was talking to her boy friend (she was married) I got hauled over the coals about that and I deserved that. I learnt to guard my comments after that
Had to report a coworker when he decided it was funny to point a broken knife at me and "threaten me in a joking way" as he put it
Everyone I ever worked with quickly realized that I could be their best friend or their worst enemy and sometimes both at once.
When anyone makes a bad sexual or racist joke, just say, "I don't get it. Explain it to me." And they usually figure out it's not so funny. You could probably use the line with unwanted flirting or come-ons. The first time I broke that out, it was freeing!
I was SO disgusted reading these that I was REALLY tempted to quit reading, but I felt in a way I owed it to the people who were telling their stories to actually READ their stories. I'm SO sad for the people who go through this. I really had no idea so many people have so many problems like this. It's shocking, disgusting and infuriating.
In future, it's ok if you need to stop. You don't have any moral obligation to read a stranger's disturbing stories. It's unhealthy to put that kind of unnecessary "responsibility" on yourself when there's no real reason to do so. The popular phrase right now is "Don't set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm" but in your case, it would be "Don't set yourself on fire out in the middle of nowhere, just in case someone stops by who might or might not need the warmth." You're allowed to protect yourself.
Load More Replies...So many of these people are the reason I have to watch 2 hours worth of videos every year.
Word of advice. Stay out of Oklahoma. I'd leave if I could afford it.
Not a co-worker, but my old boss. I was doing all of the manual labour, lifting heavy objects, going outside in the blazing summer heat, receiving deliveries, building light fixtures, cleaning the bathrooms, climbing up the ladder to reach high up stock, and even vacuuming the boss's minivan (during work hours, btw), and I was visibly sweating. My arsehole of a boss comes over and said I stink, and asked me if I even showered. I was honestly very tempted to quit then and there when he said that.
One of the mechanics where I work was calling me frigid because I wouldn't have sex with him. He no longer works there.
It wasn't said directly to me but I was around. I'm from Texas so unfortunately im no stranger to people's racist c**p but one the most racist things I've ever heard came from a guy from New York City. Years ago I worked at a pizza place run by a family. The guy who founded it was originally from NYC in the 50s/60s. He told one of my coworkers, a black kid around 15, that when he was growing up in NYC he and his friends always carried a knife and a strait razor for fights. They had both because according to him, you had to have a razor for fights with black guys because their skin is to thick and knives wouldn't cut them right. His son who was running the business banned his dad from coming into the store after that.
Had a person complain to HR that her manager was agist. Manager was the same age she was. And was not. Same person later filed one that she had been racially discriminated because she hadn't been hired for a job that she had no experience for and hadn't even applied for
I/we have had several students screaming that we are racist when they don't get the grade they want.
Load More Replies...When I was 15 I had a job in a fish & chip shop. Boss grabbed my a*s, I almost threw the fry basket at him, walked out there told him he was a gross okd man in front of a shop full of people. And my bad, at 17 I made a throw away comment about a co worker chatting to a guy. I said to another colleague that she was talking to her boy friend (she was married) I got hauled over the coals about that and I deserved that. I learnt to guard my comments after that
Had to report a coworker when he decided it was funny to point a broken knife at me and "threaten me in a joking way" as he put it
Everyone I ever worked with quickly realized that I could be their best friend or their worst enemy and sometimes both at once.