Updated on 12th June, 2023.
Who could resist a corny joke or two once in a while? Not us, for sure, because we do love some lame jokes that make you laugh purely because of their silliness and obviousness. Similar, probably, only to dad jokes, but let’s stick to ‘corny’ here.
So, while you might know what a corny joke is, do you know how the term ‘corny’ came to be? As with anything, there are quite a few theories here. For instance, there’s one that relates to folk from the US rural areas, known to city folk as the corn-fed contingent. And everything unsophisticated and funny only to farmers was called ‘corny,’ hence the corn-fed part. Another theory (it’s a good one) also stems from the rural parts of the US. Here, the theory states that farmers used to get a seed catalog ‘enriched’ by some heavy-handed, totally obvious, and absolutely bad jokes. And since they were published in a seed magazine, ‘corny’ just stuck!
Okay, so now we know the probable story of the term corny, so why don’t we check out the cheesy jokes themselves? We’re pretty sure you’re going to laugh your socks off because of their pure stupidity! Yet, even in your throes of laughter, do not forget to give these stupid jokes your vote and share this article with your friends.
What kind of tea is hard to swallow?
Reality.
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Due to quarantine, I will only be telling inside jokes!
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What did the tomato say to the other tomato during a race?
Ketchup.
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What did the ocean say to the shore?
Nothing. It waved.
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I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.
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What do you call an alligator detective?
An investi-gator.
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?
Poke her face!
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Why did the tomato blush?
He saw the salad dressing.
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What did the traffic light say to the other traffic light?
Don’t look, I’m changing!
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Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pen?
Because it’s pointless.
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Why wouldn't the shrimp share his snack?
He was shellfish.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to space?
He wanted to find Pluto!
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Two fish are in a tank, one turns to the other and asks “How do you drive this thing?”
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What do you call an American bee?
USB!
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Dear Math, grow up and solve your own problems.
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Why can't you trust the king of the jungle?
Because he's always lion.
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Why did the stadium get hot after the game?
All of the fans left.
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What kind of jewellery do rabbits wear?
14 carrot gold!
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Why don’t ants get sick?
Because they have anty bodies!
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Why did the man get hit by a bike every day?
He was stuck in a vicious cycle.
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Why don’t eggs tell jokes?
They crack up too easily.
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Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
She will let it go!
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Why did the pie go to the dentist?
To get a filling!
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Did you hear about the guy who cut off the left side of his body?
He was all right.
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Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it's a soap opera.
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What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
Sneakers!
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What do you call fake spaghetti?
An im-pasta.
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Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honeycombs.
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What do you call a factory that sells good products?
A satis-factory.
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What do sea monsters eat?
Fish and ships.
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What do you call a sleeping dinosaur?
A dino-snore.
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What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
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What’s that restaurant on the moon like?
It doesn’t have atmosphere.
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What’s the best way to burn 1,000 calories?
Leave the pizza in the oven.
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What do you call a priest that becomes a lawyer?
A father-in-law.
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How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank his coffee before it was cool.
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What do you call a man that irons clothes?
Iron Man.
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Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer?
He couldn’t see himself doing it.
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How did the barber win the race?
He knew a shortcut.
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What kind of cheese isn't yours?
Nacho cheese.
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What did one hat say to the other?
You stay here. I’ll go on ahead.
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What do you call a coffee robbery?
A mugging!
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I started telling everyone about the benefits of eating fried grapes. I’m raisin awareness.
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Why do ghosts like to ride in elevators?
It lifts their spirits!
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I farted on my wallet. Now I have gas money!
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I have a fear of speed bumps.
I’m slowly getting over them.
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What did one wall say to the other?
"I'll meet you at the corner."
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How did Harry Potter get down the hill?
Walking. JK! Rowling.
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Why do people say “break a leg” when you go on stage?
Because every play has a cast.
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Why are there gates around cemeteries?
Because people are dying to get in.
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How do you tell if a vampire is sick?
See if he is coffin.
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Why did the robber jump in the shower?
He wanted to make a clean getaway.
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Why don’t melons get married?
Because they cantaloupe.
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How did the barber win the race?
He knew a shortcut.
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What do you do with a sick boat?
Take it to the doc.
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How do you impress a baker?
Bring him flours.
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How does a rancher keep track of his cattle?
With a cow-culator.
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Which flowers are the best kissers?
Tu-lips.
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What do sprinters eat before they race?
Nothing. They fast.
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How can you tell it’s a dogwood tree?
By the bark.
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Why did the strawberry cry?
His parents were in a jam.
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Can February March?
No, but April May!
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Why did the student eat his homework?
He was told it’d be a piece of cake.
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Do they allow loud laughing in Hawaii? Or is it just a low ha?
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What do you call a sad strawberry?
A blue berry!
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Why are pirates called pirates?
They just ARRRR!
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A book fell on my head. I can only blame my shelf.
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How do you put an alien baby to sleep?
You rocket.
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What did the triangle say to the circle?
You’re pointless.
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How do you organize a space party?
You planet.
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I buy all my guns from a guy called T-Rex. He’s a small arms dealer.
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Why did the bike fall over?
It was two tired.
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Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one.
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What did the policeman say to his belly button?
You’re under a vest.
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
If they flew over the bay, they would be bagels.
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Where can you buy soup in bulk?
The stock market.
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If athletes get athlete’s foot, what do elves get?
Mistle-toes.
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What did the yoga instructor say when her landlord tried to evict her?
Namaste.
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What kind of music do planets like?
Neptunes.
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What do you call a fish without eyes?
Fsh.
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How do you stop a bull from charging?
Cancel its credit card.
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Why did the mushroom go to the party?
Because he was a fungi.
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What do cows most like to read?
Cattle-logs.
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Why did the photo go to jail?
Because it was framed.
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What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
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Why are frogs are so happy?
They eat whatever bugs them.
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What does corn say when it gets a compliment?
Aw shucks!
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What do you call it when Batman skips church?
Christian Bale.
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Why are elephants wrinkly?
Because you can’t iron them.
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Why couldn't the pirate learn the alphabet?
Because he got lost at C.
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Why can’t you trust duck doctors?
They’re all quacks.
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What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain.
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Why don’t they play poker in the jungle?
Too many cheetahs.
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How do you make a tissue dance?
You put a little boogie in it.
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A man was attacked by string instruments.
It was a violin-t act!
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Where did Captain Hook but his hook?
The second-hand store.
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Why was the ocean upset?
It felt a little crabby.
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What did the woman say when all her lamps were stolen?
Nothing, she was delighted!
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I lost an electron.
You really have to keep an ion them!
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If you watch an Apple store get robbed, are you an iwitness?
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What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frostbite.
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What do you call a belt with a clock on it?
A waist of time!
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What tree can you fit in your hand?
A palm tree!
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What do clouds wear under their shorts?
Thunder pants!
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Why was the student’s report card wet?
His grades were below c-level.
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My wife said I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.
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How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
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What did the zero say to the eight?
"That belt looks good on you."
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What kind of car does an egg drive?
A yolkswagen.
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How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together.
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I'm on a seafood diet: When I see food, I eat it.
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What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop.
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What’s the difference between bird flu and swine flu?
One requires tweetment and the other an oinkment.
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What kind of ghost has the best hearing?
The eeriest.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What’s brown and sticky?
A stick.
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Why did the farmer win an award?
He was outstanding in his field.
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When do computers overheat?
When they need to vent.
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Why can’t your ear be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.
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What was the frog’s job at the hotel?
Bellhop.
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Why did the restaurant hire a pig?
He was good at bacon.
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What has more lives than a cat?
A frog, because it croaks every day.
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When is a door not a door?
When it’s ajar.
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What do you call a snobby criminal going down the stairs?
A con descending.
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What lights up a soccer stadium?
A soccer match.
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Where does the electric cord go to shop?
An outlet mall.
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What do you call banana peel shoes?
Slippers.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer.
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Why wouldn’t the poppy seed leave the casino?
He was on a roll.
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What did the elevator say when it sneezed?
I think I’m coming down with something.
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What runs but never goes anywhere?
A fridge.
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How does a duck buy lipstick?
She just puts it on her bill.
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What do horses say when they fall?
I can’t giddy up.
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What did the cake say to the fork?
You want a piece of me?
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Why is grass so dangerous?
It’s full of blades.
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What do elf’s learn in school?
The elf-abet.
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Did you hear about two guys who stole a calendar?
I heard they both got six months!
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I got thrown out of a park because I was rearranging squirrels by height.
They didn’t like my critter sizing!
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What do you call an angry carrot?
A steamed veggie!
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Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don’t work!
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What did the nut say to the other nut in a game of tag?
Imma cashew!
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What rock group has four men that don’t sing?
Mount Rushmore!
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What’s the world’s tallest building?
A library because it has the most stories!
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My horse’s name is Mayo. Because Mayo neighs!
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Have you heard about the chocolate record player? It sounds pretty sweet.
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Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water?
Because he was a little horse.
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What did the bartender say to the turkey sandwich when it tried to order a beer?
"Sorry, we don’t serve food here."
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How did the dead brother and his dead brother resemble each other?
They were dead ringers.
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How do rabbits travel?
By hareplanes.
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What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef.
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Why does a chicken coop only have two doors?
If it had four doors it would be called a chicken sedan.
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Have you heard about the corduroy pillow?
It’s making headlines!
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Why are the Irish so wealthy?
Because their capital is Dublin.
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What do lawyers wear to work?
Lawsuits.
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Why don’t you buy things with Velcro?
It’s a rip-off.
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What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire.
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What do you call a row of rabbits hopping away?
A receding hare line.
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Why did the kid stock up on yeast?
He wanted to make some dough.
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What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?
"Give me my quarterback."
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Why were the fish’s grades bad?
They were below sea level.
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What kind of music do mummies listen to?
Wrap music.
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How did the two cats end their fight?
They hissed and made up.
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What’s black and white and read all over?
A newspaper!
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Why should you never fight a dinosaur?
You’ll get jurasskicked!
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Did you know that alligators can grow up to 15 feet?
Well, I didn’t they usually only have 4!
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What kind of mistakes do ghosts make?
Boo-boos!
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What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
"Supplies!"
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A skeleton walks into a bar and says, "Hey, bartender. I'll have one beer and a mop."
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Why did the chicken cross the park?
To get to the other slide.
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