Just over 20 years ago, I had cut my thumb and it wasn't healing. It needed a couple of stitches — no big deal. My normal doctor was away and I had a locum.

As an afterthought, I asked for a prescription for the pill. I only took it for regularity as I had been told I couldn't have kids due to severe endometritis.

The doctor wanted to do a pregnancy test first as I was a few days late. I told him that was normal for my body (even on the pill), but he insisted.

As we waited for the result, he started writing out the prescription. Suddenly he looked at the test, looked at me and said, 'Congratulations! You're pregnant!’

My life was complicated back then and to say it was a shock was an understatement. I saw stars and walked out in a daze.

My beautiful golden haired girl entered the world 9 months later (the photo is of her and her beautiful partner) and changed my life. She is the best thing that ever happened to me. We are best friends and talk nearly every day.

She taught me unconditional love and loyalty and has the purest heart of anyone I know.

To say I love my daughter is an understatement.

My mom can kiss the dog as many times as she wants and he's fine with it.

If I kiss the dog, I get growled at.

In middle school, the teacher's son was in her class and he was relentlessly bullying one of my friends: being in his space all the time, throwing mud and packed ice at him outside. Whenever my friend would try to get him off or yell for him to go away she would say "inside voices please" and "that's just how boys are".

Eventually my friend had enough, picked up the other kid, and gave him a concussion from throwing him on the pavement. He was suspended and then the teacher brought in a speaker to talk about bullying in school. So, being the smart*ss that I was, I raised my hand and asked, "what are we supposed to do when the bully is the teacher's kid and she doesn't see the problem?" and looked right back at her.

My friend was back in school the next week.

My nephew's school had two students who won a contest all by themselves. They got a chance to meet the prime minister and show their work. But at the last moment, the principal insisted to add his daughter in the team.

Not exactly a normal answer but...

I’m a stripper. I’ve been working as a stripper for almost five years. The club I work at is very alternative so most of the time I wear converse, which actually makes me more approachable and popular.

New girl (I mean new to dancing not just the club) told me that if I really wanted to make money I should “grow up and wear some heels.” I get this pretty often.

I’m consistently the top earner at our club. She lasted less than a month.

I managed to try to explain variance is swing time to one of the worlds greatest Jazz drummers on Instagram. In my defense he asked a very basic question and I didn’t know who he was. I was definitely not condescending but still feel like an idiot for trying to explain a basic concept to one of the greatest jazz drummers of our time.

He was VERY cool about it. I had a lot of people clowning me and I deserved it.

A lady at an office job I had for a short time saw that I was new and decided to try to teach me how to copy and paste on the computer since "we use it a lot". She got mad and accused me of "not listening to her" when I did it by using ctrl+c / ctrl+v instead of her method, which was Edit>Copy, put cursor in desired spot, then Edit>Paste. She wanted me to do it again, so I did ctrl+z to undo everything we had just done. Got mad and started screaming at me "UNDO!!! UNDO!!!" not realizing I had literally just done that, since the only correct way is Edit>Undo!!

She then brought in a younger person to teach me how to set up my email signature. I simply went to the icon that had a dropdown that said "Edit Signature" or something similar and brought up the window. The younger person said "No, that's the wrong one, let me show you where it is" and went through at least 3 different menus only to get to the exact same window. She insisted that was the right one and denied it was the exact same one.

The older lady brought the younger lady in to teach me because "she's the best here at computers". They both got mad at me for "not listening". Older lady went to complain to my supervisor about my unwillingness to learn how to use the computer. I was only in that job while I waited to hear back from developer jobs.