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Rat
Community Member
3 posts
2.3K comments
69K upvotes
7.4K points
Hi! you can call me Rat! He/it/slime pronouns! Feel free to chat with me in the comments as long as you're kind and stuff :) Have a good day/night! BLM and love is love! (a couple fun facts about me: i'm aromantic asexual and agender, and I practice witchcraft and I'm a satanist! i also have so many music, media, and hobby interests i'm not even gonna try and list them all here :) )
Rat • upvoted an item 1 year ago
Rat • upvoted 39 items 2 years ago
Curiosities, Halloween
I Like Recreating Vintage Horror Shots, Here Are My 23 Photos Of Creepy Clowns In A Cornfield
Art, Celebrities
I Paint Portraits Of Popular Figures On Vinyl Records, Here Are 29 Of Them (New Pics)
Comics, Funny
I Wrote Inappropriate “Children’s” Books And Here Are Some Of My Worst Titles (42 Pics)
Photography
30 Surreal Self-Portraits Wearing Full-Body Suits That Suggest Strangeness, Otherworldliness, And Isolation
Art
My Series Of Illustrations Looking At The Relationships Of People And Their Pets In The Lockdown (16 Pics)
Show All 39 Upvotes
Rat • submitted 3 new posts 3 years ago
Rat • submitted 20 list additions 3 years ago
Rat • commented on 20 posts 2 years ago
Rat • upvoted 20 items 2 years ago
Never Teaching Their Kid To Be Independent
Never teaching me to be independent. My guardian was obsessed with keeping me way too close and I was always sheltered and now I'm alone and don't know how to function
Never Taking Interest In Their Child's Interests
They didn’t take any interest in my interests. So now I’m 30 with parents I have virtually nothing in common with. It makes dinner chitchat very depressing for me.
Giving Their Child Body Dysmorphia
My mom always meant well but I have body dysmorphia for life. I’m sharing because if any parents are reading this you should be diligent about how you talk about your body in front of your kids. Don’t talk about needing to lose or gain weight unless it’s for health reasons. Don’t put yourself down about how you look in front of your kids. This creates doubt and body image issues from the jump and that sticks with you forever.
Not Saying "I'm Proud Of You"
Keeping me /s Honestly, it would have been nice to hear they were proud of me - just once, don’t want to overdo it.
Lashing Out For Bad Grades
Violently screaming at me for bad grades or poor performance in sports. I think it had the opposite effect where I became afraid of making any mistakes, which would lead to more mistakes. Feel like if your kid is underperforming in any way, there’s a way to talk to them without making them feel stupid for f*****g up. There are better ways to motivate them.
Never Admitting That They Did Something Wrong
Never admitting that they did something wrong. An example is that when I was in second grade my mom would literally yell and scold me because she thought that HAVE was spelled HAV, and that also confused me with the word HAD. Even though at school the teachers and everyone else spelled HAVE, when I got home she would scold me for spelling it correctly until I told her that that's how everyone else spelled it. She just looked at the paper and never said a word about it again. So now I always think that whatever I'm doing is wrong or if something did go wrong and was clearly out of my control I still get nervous.
Taking Away Sports For Bad Grades
Taking away sports every time I got a C in school. I will NEVER take away my future kids passions. Does not matter if it is sports, art, music, or anything else. Don't know if the frustration of that will ever dissipate for me. That was my outlet that was severely needed.
Leaving A Child To Their Own Devices
Leaving me to my own devices so long as my grades were good. Not teaching me much of anything outside of knowing right from wrong. Outside of being kept alive I pretty much raised myself.
Giving No Privacy
Giving me no privacy. My parents snooped way too much. Searching my clothes draws for hidden things, checking my phone, eavesdropping on my conversations, talking about my private life to their friends as if it was hot gossip, spying me when i was out, asking their friends to report in if they ever saw me out and around, checking my mail, checking the computer history every time i used it, listening to my CD’s to check they were appropriate, arranging additional meetings with my teachers to ask about me, asking me personal questions all the time. Basically not giving me any space to just be me. They also made a lot of jokes about me to other people, right in front of my face. I often felt like i was their pet more than an actual human. I’m now deeply self-conscious and suspicious as a result. I always have this feeling that people are watching and judging me. Edit: reading it back, that all sounds minor. But believe me when i say i didn’t have even once second of privacy and they went to extreme lengths to find out every single thing i was doing at all times even when i was out of the house. They would then share that information about me with their friends and colleagues, like i was just a piece of gossip or a tv storyline.
Excessive Sheltering
Wayyyyy too sheltered. I will definitely shelter my kids to an extent and raise them right but my parents took it to the extreme. I was only allowed to play with religious children and wasn't allowed to watch movies besides basically Disney movies until I was in High School. This led to a pretty rebellious phase when I was around 15 that I think could have been avoided if my parents weren't so strict.
Never Praising A Child For Their Results
I was one of those gifted kids that do very well in school without much effort. My parents were used to it so they never praised me for my results and expected me to always do good by default. This resulted in me thinking that very good was just average, and constantly striving for perfection in any aspect of my life. This led to countless problems that I needed therapy to solve.
Teaching That It's Never Okay To Lie
1. Teaching it’s never OK to lie is an awful life lesson for keeping yourself out of trouble. 2. Being a “member of the clean plate club” teaches kids to keep eating when they’re full. 3. teaching that the man is head of household, when that doesn’t work in a lot of relationships.
Communicating Through Child When Separated
the way they used to communicate through me because they wouldn't speak to each other after they seperated. when I had to deliver a message from one parent that the other one didn't like, I was the one who was yelled at, and both of them asked me to side with them instead of the other. there was no way to win, because I always either made mummy sad or daddy sad. good times. Rat • is following 182 people
Rat • 111 followers
