Me and my ex (a nurse) had been together for 5 years. 4 years in we began to look at houses together in Manchester, UK as she was successful in interview for a higher paid position within Manchester Hospital. Manchester has really good Media production opportunities and I had worked in film production there before picking up a safe and tidy job in Higher education teaching Production technology. I was willing to give this up to go back into industry based in Manchester to support her career.

At the time we lived in smaller towns. She had a friend in Manchester who I’d been aware of for years. Guy had a family and happily married and posed no threat.

At every opportunity we would liaise with old friends/colleagues in Manchester to house hunt, lodge etc sometimes as a couple and sometimes separately based on work schedule.

She went a lot more than me as her sister was also working at Manchester University and would stay there for weekends.

We had spent a year trying for a baby and she was 5 months pregnant. I gave up my job, served my notice and helped recruit my replacement. We had also secured a house (of which about 50k was my own savings towards the deposit) and I had new work back in the film industry though much lower paid than what I had got previously.

We celebrated by going on holiday abroad to Morroco for some sun and a time out where I had also planned to propose in the Sahara desert where the hotel staff had set up a desert tent and picnic etc including hot air balloons to get there and camels to come back.

2 days prior to proposing my exs sister called me to tell me she had found out through mutual friends that the baby was likely not mine but this Guy friend. My ex had been sleeping with him for the last 6 months during her trips to go house hunting.

It came about when my ex’s sister was confused when I asked how their weekends had been as I was under the impression my ex had stayed with her sister and her sister had no idea what I was talking about.

Needless to say I cancelled the engagement plans. I waited until we were at the airport before confronting her but she knew something was up as I became exceptionally withdrawn for the remainder of the holiday. Her paranoia was the guilty verdict.

The baby was indeed her male friends and he denied all involvement and remains with his wife whilst my ex birthed a fatherless baby.

I also lost my deposit after selling the house and just about paying off the loan. I’d lost my secure job in higher education and had been lead to believe a 7 month pregnancy was to be my child.

I really spiralled after that and ended up in an abusive relationship about 2 years after where I was assaulted by a manipulative narcissist girlfriend.

Only recently started dating again after 2 more years.

I didn’t know girls weren’t supposed to have internal exams done at the doctors when you hit puberty, i thought it was just something everyone had to do. Didn’t know it wasn’t until I told my therapist about it in passing.

My nursery school teachers would tape our mouths shut if we talked without raising our hands. It was the 70’s. Honestly more funny than f****d up.

I spent 8 hours a day locked in a dark closet for ~9 months when I was 6. Assumed it was normal punishment.

(It wasn't my parents that did this, but the school they sent me to. My parents did not find out about this until years later).

I never saw my parents kiss or embrace in any way. They were married and loved each other until my mother passed and my dad is broken by it. They were so in love, he is still broken years on. I just never saw any visual or auditory affection. It has shaped the way I show love, which is muted and is a problem. I am not open, I try really hard to say it but I am bad at it. I come off as awkward and “forced”. My wife’s family is/was very open and she just does not get it.

Went on holidays with my dad and fell and broke my arm in the first hour. Dad refused to take me to the hospital all day and only the next day took me to confirm. I had snapped my arm. At the time I thought it was my fault but looking back I realise it was abuse.

Not sure if it's f****d up, but I didn't realize how strange it was when I was in high school. My school had a dress code, and my freshman English teacher was a stickler for it. He was so concerned about girls trying to conceal spaghetti straps that he would make us take off our jackets/sweaters to show him what's underneath. It didn't occur to me until I was older that we were perfectly covered, why did it matter what we had on underneath?

We used to go camping in far north Queensland every year and when mum and her boyfriend would go out in the boat they would chain me to a tree in camp so I wouldn’t run away while they were out….. area is known for large saltwater crocs and we always camped close to the water.

A few years back, my cousin and I were reminiscing about how we lived together when we were 4 in a rough neighborhood and our moms would have us play a game of “who can play on the floor”. It wasn’t until that moment I realized it was because there were gangs in our neighborhood and they wanted to prevent us from getting s**t.

I wasn't diagnosed with autism and adhd until last year, at the age of 53. There were times in my youth when I was yelled at and grounded for not doing homework or paying attention in class, poor performance, etc. Nowadays I'd have been diagnosed and treated by elementary school. I don't hold it against my parents because they couldn't have known, but a couple of my teachers were real d***s about it.