Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
Join the Fun!
Join 1.2 million Panda readers who get the best art, memes, and fun stories every week!
Thank you!
You're on the list! Expect to receive your first email very soon!
Bored Panda is Even Better on the App!
Stay Updated with Real-Time Notifications
Instant Access via Homescreen Tap
Simple Interface - Even Your Cat Can Use It!
Beach Bum
Community Member
1 posts
76 comments
2.5K upvotes
166 points
This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself.
Beach Bum • commented on 2 posts 2 months ago
Beach Bum • upvoted an item 6 months ago
Professional-Box4153 reply
Was run over by a van as a child. Dragged for 3 blocks before the van stalled when my leg covered the exhaust pipe (burning a hole in my knee). I survived with mostly burns (road rash on my face and arms), a hairline fracture in my ankle, and the hole in my knee. The bicycle I was riding somehow bent around my head and kept it from hitting the ground so I never sustained any head trauma. The chances of all of that happening are astronomically low. Beach Bum • upvoted 2 items 7 months ago
Beach Bum • submitted a list addition 7 months ago
Beach Bum • submitted a new post 7 months ago
Beach Bum • commented on a post 7 months ago
Beach Bum • upvoted 2 items 8 months ago
Beach Bum • upvoted 2 items 9 months ago
Beach Bum • upvoted 21 items 1 year ago
ILMLTB reply
I was at a fancy dinner in a country where meat is a central part of the diet. One man, however, was a vegetarian. As this was uncommon in the area, I asked what got him interested in vegetarianism. He explained that he was once forced to eat other human beings, and has not been able to eat meat since. It was an unfortunately true story of how he’d been stopped by terrorists in some African country when he was chaperoning a bus full of children on some trip. Granted, he knew it wasn’t “normal”, but he dropped it so casually as if it were as banal as any other reason to become vegetarian.
NeverMeantDuckin reply
I was the matron of honor at my BFFs wedding. Her dad was semi recently married to his 4th? Wife. So, brides “step mom” but only in name. She and the bride didn’t get along, but were surface level cordial to each other. Step mom is super weird about $. Because she had none, and married the dad for his. She was very upset about how much he spent on this wedding for his only daughter. So upset apparently, she showed up in a floor length, full on white wedding gown of her own. The wedding coordinator sees them walk in, pulls me aside and let’s me know this b***h just walked in to the cocktail hour before the ceremony in a god damn wedding dress and asks if I think the bride should be made aware or if we should just hope she doesn’t notice until after the vows etc. I told her I would take care of it, and did. We did the “getting ready pics” in the bridal suite, and after she was all ready to go and it was 15 mins till showtime… I took the bride out to the patio overlooking her gorgeous venue, and watched her guests scurrying to find their seats and we shared a secret cigarette like we were teenagers again… and I told her that I saw her step mother in the lobby. And that i unceremoniously poured an entire glass of red wine down the front of her dress.
Show All 21 Upvotes
Beach Bum • commented on 6 posts 1 year ago
Show All 6 Comments
Beach Bum • submitted a new post 7 months ago
Beach Bum • submitted a list addition 7 months ago
Beach Bum • submitted 2 list additions 1 year ago
Beach Bum • commented on 2 posts 2 months ago
Beach Bum • commented on a post 7 months ago
Beach Bum • commented on 17 posts 1 year ago
Beach Bum • upvoted an item 6 months ago
Professional-Box4153 reply
Was run over by a van as a child. Dragged for 3 blocks before the van stalled when my leg covered the exhaust pipe (burning a hole in my knee). I survived with mostly burns (road rash on my face and arms), a hairline fracture in my ankle, and the hole in my knee. The bicycle I was riding somehow bent around my head and kept it from hitting the ground so I never sustained any head trauma. The chances of all of that happening are astronomically low. Beach Bum • upvoted 2 items 7 months ago
Beach Bum • upvoted 2 items 8 months ago
Beach Bum • upvoted 2 items 9 months ago
Beach Bum • upvoted 12 items 1 year ago
ILMLTB reply
I was at a fancy dinner in a country where meat is a central part of the diet. One man, however, was a vegetarian. As this was uncommon in the area, I asked what got him interested in vegetarianism. He explained that he was once forced to eat other human beings, and has not been able to eat meat since. It was an unfortunately true story of how he’d been stopped by terrorists in some African country when he was chaperoning a bus full of children on some trip. Granted, he knew it wasn’t “normal”, but he dropped it so casually as if it were as banal as any other reason to become vegetarian.NeverMeantDuckin reply
I was the matron of honor at my BFFs wedding. Her dad was semi recently married to his 4th? Wife. So, brides “step mom” but only in name. She and the bride didn’t get along, but were surface level cordial to each other. Step mom is super weird about $. Because she had none, and married the dad for his. She was very upset about how much he spent on this wedding for his only daughter. So upset apparently, she showed up in a floor length, full on white wedding gown of her own. The wedding coordinator sees them walk in, pulls me aside and let’s me know this b***h just walked in to the cocktail hour before the ceremony in a god damn wedding dress and asks if I think the bride should be made aware or if we should just hope she doesn’t notice until after the vows etc. I told her I would take care of it, and did. We did the “getting ready pics” in the bridal suite, and after she was all ready to go and it was 15 mins till showtime… I took the bride out to the patio overlooking her gorgeous venue, and watched her guests scurrying to find their seats and we shared a secret cigarette like we were teenagers again… and I told her that I saw her step mother in the lobby. And that i unceremoniously poured an entire glass of red wine down the front of her dress.This Panda hasn't followed anyone yet
Beach Bum • 1 follower
