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arlo :))

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arlo :))

Community Member

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2 posts

3 comments

2.8K upvotes

39 points

I like books, music, and everything funny :)) P.S. i'm totally down to be besties

Follow (9)

arlo :)) • upvoted an item 1 month ago

30 "They're Not Gonna Last Long" Wedding Moments Shared In This Online Thread

I support the groom's father.

arlo :)) • upvoted an item 2 months ago

I'm Trying To Make My Work Truck The Antithesis Of Most Trucks With Bumper Stickers I See

arlo :)) • upvoted an item 3 months ago

A Chia Seed Sprouted From My Toothbrush

arlo :)) • upvoted 6 items 5 months ago

Kidnapped-People-Share-Stories

I was walking to school alone at night and this guy pulled up next to me and tried grabbing my arm through his window, telling me to get in the car. He tried getting out of his car, and stuck his leg out. I body slammed the door so hard that I heard the crunch that was his leg breaking. He screamed, and I hit him square in the nose with the vitamin water I had in my hand. I sprinted all the way back to the school. When the officer talked with me, she said I did an amazing job.

Friendly Reminder Of How Ridiculously Big The Pacific Ocean Is

Kidnapped-People-Share-Stories

Friendly Reminder Of How Ridiculously Big The Pacific Ocean Is

wizardofgauze_ reply

On an island called Cat Cay in the Bahamas, there is an area called the Flats, where the tide rolls out extremely fast for a mile. You can walk on the sand and find incredible things (sand dollars, crabs, shells). The water moves out so fast, fish are lying on the sand still alive. The tide comes back in just as fast. Like a tsunami of water. I was 8, out there with my mom. She forgot that day was daylight savings time and misjudged. Thought we had another hour. The water came in and we started running. But before we knew it, we were up to our necks and the suction out to sea was so strong, it ripped off both our water shoes and her shirt. She carried me on her back, one step at a time, staying completely calm. The water was up to her ears. When we got to shore, we both lied on the beach completed exhausted. She could barely walk. Moms are incredible.

Wholesome-Relatable-Jokes

Things-You-Dont-Learn-In-High-School-College

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arlo :)) • upvoted 12 items 6 months ago

Authentic Geological Map Of Scotland

Rorschach_22 reply

As a Canadian, I cannot stress this enough: DO NOT APPROACH THE GEESE IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE.

Authentic Geological Map Of Scotland

Rorschach_22 reply

As a Canadian, I cannot stress this enough: DO NOT APPROACH THE GEESE IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE.

“None Of The Doctors Have Been Able To Explain How”: 30 Disturbing Experiences People Can’t Explain

You could just have run the f****r over…

btechpc reply

Mom of my sons friend would always drop him off at our house to hang out and she would always comment how lovely our house was, which was a sense of pride for me as it was my dream home that I designed and built. Then one day he was going to their house to hang out so I drop him off. Driving down the road to their house and round the corner to what looks like a French ski chateau, just grand and enormous. Let’s just say most of my house could fit in the garage. She opens the door and my jaw hits the ground with the immense opulence and beautiful wood working. We exchanged pleasantries and of course I comment ‘this is a really really lovely place!’ She said thank you and off I went. Picked up the kid later in the day, says how nice the parents and siblings are. Made me realize that not all rich people are a******s, only the ones who act like they have money but really don’t. Was eye opening for me.

whatintheactualfeth reply

Went to a new friends house for the first time when I was in the 6th(?) grade. We walked through the front door. Friend: Mom! We're home! Mom comes around a corner: Oh my god! It's so great to finally meet you! Friend talks about you a lot! (Gives me a hug) How are you!? Me: ^I'm ^fine. Mom: Are you hungry? I was about to make us a snack. Dad! Come meet Friend's friend! Dad comes around another corner: Hey kiddo! It's good to meet you. (Shakes my hand) If you guys are good, I'll take you guys to Fun Place later and we'll get some pizza. (Kisses Mom) I'll be in the garage. (Smacks Mom's butt) Mom: (giggles) You guys go play in your room. I'll bring you something to eat. I was stunned. They were nice to me AND each other! I mentioned it to my friend later, and he apologized because they "were so embarrassing". My parents weren't in a room together without at least insulting each other. I really hope Friend's parents are still married and insanely happy. Edit: Since this kinda blew up. They were really the nicest couple. They really loved each other and my friend, from what I saw. I hung out there for a bit, but I ended up moving (again) about a year later. We indeed went for pizza that night, and his mom made a really big breakfast the next morning. The blueberry cake thing she made still lingers in my dreams. They are the couple that I've most tried to emulate in my marriage of nearly 30 years. It really does help to have the right partner, but it is definitely worth the effort.

This FB Page Is Dedicated To Finding The Best Posts On Tumblr, Here Are 45 Of Them

Not sure what this is doing here but it is beautiful.

50 Times Signs Were So Funny, People Just Had To Share Them In This Facebook Group

teowhyaoaaeac

"I Never Came Clean": 35 People Reveal Their Most Disturbing Secrets

But please, please, do and try to get help, OP. It will kill you. Alcohol is poison.

Accurate_Western_346 reply

"Can't you see I'm blind?" "No because I'm blind too!" Two blind men before laughing their a**es off after bumping into each other.

PhysiologyIsPhun reply

Guy next to me at a urinal farted once and loudly says "sometimes when it rains it thunders". I stole it.

Wonderful_Whereas402 reply

I was walking along 10th street in Brooklyn when a man walked by on his phone and all I caught of his conversation was "I don't know, I've never owned a f*****g giraffe before."

Cursed_sport

Show All 12 Upvotes

arlo :)) • upvoted an item 7 months ago

40 Times Weddings Went So Wrong, People Just Had To Vent Online

Stand up for your lady you spineless trucknut!

arlo :)) • upvoted 18 items 8 months ago

milka-maple reply

Discharge can bleach underwear. Not stain, actually remove color.

Thecuriousgal94 reply

I had a “best friend” that would humiliate me in front of groups of friends. One night he decided to do it in front of the guy I had just started dating, sharing really embarrassing/personal stories and wouldn’t stop. Everyone was laughing. I went into the bathroom and scrubbed the toilet with his toothbrush. Have never told a soul about that.

Tom_Marto reply

My fiance loves to sing around the house - but only when I'm not there or can't hear. She has the most beautiful voice and incredible vocal ability. My secret? When I have my headphones on around the house, she'll sometimes call out to me and I'll pretend I can't hear her at all. She'll often start singing and I turn my headphones off so I can hear her properly. It's been 4 years and she still doesn't know that I purposely ignore her so I can listen to her singing.

unicornbirth reply

I’ve tried to off myself several times before, I have “ letters” hidden everywhere to my husband and my kids and my mom and siblings. I started Zoloft because of it, I had developed a panic disorder about three years ago and no one would take me seriously when i would try to talk about it, other than my husband, I started Zoloft for my anxiety, but in reality I started it so i would stay alive for my husband and my children, and it’s been 4 months in, and the past two weeks I’ve actually felt happy, like excited about living instead of the opposite.

BarnacleMcBarndoor reply

Im in love with my best friend. I told her two years ago that I wanted to take her on actual date, and she told me she just wanted to be friends. After that’s It was a couple weeks of her not really talking to me and then unfortunately she had an accident. The accidentally resulted in problems partially impacting both long and short term memory. I didn’t ask if she remembered our conversation. And we more or less went back to the way things were, other than her telling me the same adorable stories over and over again, multiple times a week.

confusedhuskynoises reply

Sometimes I tighten jar lids and ask my husband to help me open them. Or I’ll push something just out of my reach if it’s on a high shelf then ask him to grab it for me. I love when he helps me, and I know he loves to do small things for me.

FirmlyThatGuy reply

I’ve been secretly trying to make my daughter’s first word “momma” because I know it will make my wife unimaginably happy. She’s doing well with the coaching so I think I’ve got a shot!

Able-Badger-1713 reply

I have told a few people. But it’s limited. I am a CSA victim and my abuser made national news twice for the video she took of us boys, not the physical abuse. Police didn’t investigate properly, and when I went to make a report 30 years after the abuse the cop at reception was a hostile, rude aggressive man. I walked out actually crying. The cop quit his job 2 weeks into his investigation. But that cop literally broke me soul. I don’t feel strong enough to open up about my abuse and how hard it’s been being let down by police at every step. 🤷‍♂️ .

Killer_Kass reply

A few years ago my dads truck was broken into and he lost all of his rings (he had several silver rings, would take them off to drive bc the wheel rubbing on the rings was iritating. Forgot them in the truck one day and they were all stolen). My dad is not the type to accept gifts, especially if it's a replacement for something that was lost due to his own error. Over the years, I've been slowly replacing them. I'll save up, buy a ring that looks similar to one of the old ones, and then I'll either claim I found it somewhere or leave it for him to find. I replaced 2 by pretending I found them in the snow while out shoveling. Months later I left one outside our front door for him to find. It makes him SO happy everytime one is found. I hope he never finds out I am the one leaving them lol.

CTnaturist reply

I pointed a gun at my stepmom's abusive boyfriend when he was sleeping and couldn't pull the trigger.

ItinerantAvenger reply

Back when we were dating, my wife found out I'd never had a surprise birthday party before. She *really* wanted to throw one for me, which I was okay with. Only one problem: it never worked. She'd try almost every year, try throwing surprise parties for other occasions. Each time, as she was planning stuff, I'd pick up on some discrepancy in her cover story, or pick up on something that a friend said, ask about it, and she'd be unable to cover it. Then finally, after years and years of this, she pulled it off. She was delighted and so proud that she at last managed to surprise me. She's talked about it for years, about how close I came to uncovering it. It made her so happy, and it was a lot of fun. Except what actually happened is I finally managed to be quick enough putting the pieces together to stop myself before I asked about the discrepancy in her cover story. Played dumb, pretended I had no idea. Acted surprised when the day came. She will never know.

ksozay reply

Sometimes I get up in the morning, shower, get ready, and then get back into bed and pretend to be sleeping just so my daughter can run into our room and wake me up. She's 7, and still loves waking me up in the morning to get my day started by seeing her face first. I pray that I will never know a day that doesn't start like this.

‘How Mental’: 50 Funny Memes To Send Your Therapist

Every time I get on BP.

‘How Mental’: 50 Funny Memes To Send Your Therapist

This is my soulmate.

30 Women Who Tried So Hard To Prove That They’re Unique That They Just Embarrassed Themselves (New Pics)

Upcoted for the funny response to the op

Show All 18 Upvotes

arlo :)) • upvoted 3 items 1 month ago

30 "They're Not Gonna Last Long" Wedding Moments Shared In This Online Thread

I support the groom's father.