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Swimming in warm water in the summertime. Placing the final piece of a puzzle that’s taken you months to complete. ‘Roasting’ someone online with a comeback so witty and so savage, they had to call the ‘Oh Snap’ and fire brigades. All three things have one thing in common—they’re all human experiences that make us feel gooood.

The ‘Clever Comebacks’ subreddit is one of the best places on the net to go to for awesome retorts that will forever be enshrined on the internet in online screenshots. Check out some of the most on-point and hilarious comebacks they posted ever. Remember to upvote your fave ones and we hope they’ll inspire you to show off your wit the next time someone says something dumb or has a go at you.

Bored Panda was interested to learn about what makes comebacks witty and about comedic timing, so we reached out to comedy writer and author of 'How to Live to 100,' Ariane Sherine. Read on to learn what she told us. What’s the best comeback that you’ve ever said or heard in real life, dear Readers? Do you think that the pen is mightier than the sword? Share your thoughts with all of us in the comments.

#1

I Understand Completely

I Understand Completely

My_Memes_Will_Cure_U Report

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#2

Never Underestimate A Woman

Never Underestimate A Woman

Dry-Net Report

#3

“Migrants Can’t Assimilate Into Society”

“Migrants Can’t Assimilate Into Society”

reddit.com , twitter.com Report

Comedy writer Ariane told Bored Panda that, in her opinion, witty comebacks can be both spontaenous and planned out. "I've definitely come up with comebacks that are spontaneous. For instance, I told my daughter that if she didn't behave, I'd give her inheritance to a donkey sanctuary. She said, 'You wouldn't', and I came back, 'You bet your ass!' But though I hadn't used that comeback before, I clearly had knowledge of the pun and might have used something similar in the past."

She also pointed out something that honestly took me by surprise: "When it comes to stand-up, a lot of heckle putdowns are scripted and shared among comics." And here I thought that heckles were all instinctive and natural. I'll have to rethink some stuff about my fave comedians now.

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#4

Love This Guy

Love This Guy

humanitalian , BodyForWife Report

#5

Idk If This Has Been Posted Before, But I Love His Little Smile

Idk If This Has Been Posted Before, But I Love His Little Smile

twinkletoes_44 Report

#6

People Really Live In Their Own Little Bubbles

People Really Live In Their Own Little Bubbles

hayashiiiii , quentquarantino Report

Ariane said that the line between a regular comeback and one that makes us snort into our cups of tea is clear for everyone to see. "It needs to be very fast, well-timed, and take people by surprise as well as being clever, witty, and immediately understandable." So no pressure then!

The beauty of comedy, according to Ariane, is that (sometimes) our subconscious mind kicks in and takes us by surprise, along with the audience. "But that's relatively rare in my experience. I'm sure many other comics are more natural than I am!

#7

Please Wear A Mask And Stay Safe

Please Wear A Mask And Stay Safe

themaskedvillain Report

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#8

You're The Problem

You're The Problem

Cereal_killer03 , BodyForWife Report

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#9

Thank You Andy Wang!

Thank You Andy Wang!

ykafia Report

The ‘Clever Comebacks’ community was founded in January 2018 and will be celebrating its 3-year anniversary very soon. In that time, they’ve amassed nearly 679k loyal members who are practicing the ancient art of the perfect comeback.

Personally, I think that comebacks are all about accurate, piercing, rapier-like wit. And the essence of wit is brevity, spontaneity, and stating the truth. It’s not a comeback if you spend an hour thinking about it and then another hour writing it out. Comebacks are the sniper rifles of the verbal battlefield. Not shotguns. Not machine guns. It’s all about one phrase—one roast.

The BBC tends to agree with my point of view. According to Rhea Wessel, witty comebacks can’t be planned—they can only be made in the moment. And timing is everything. Even if you come up with the perfect thing you could’ve said while you’re in the shower a day later, that amazing comeback is useless now. Too little. Too late.

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#10

I Don’t Care If Repost Made Me Laugh

I Don’t Care If Repost Made Me Laugh

iamafailedasian Report

#11

Illegal Plants

Illegal Plants

YoloForJesusChrist Report

#12

British Museum

British Museum

athrvpatil , SumzIbrahiim Report

That’s actually the beauty of comebacks. Sometimes, you end up just as surprised by your wit as everyone else is. It’s like, for a single beautiful moment, the Spirit of Absolute Roasting possessed you and gave you glorious guidance. 

Abigail Paul, the artistic director at the Theatre Language Studio in Frankfurt, told the BBC that we can improve our wit by giving ourselves just a bit of extra time to craft a great answer. Strangely enough, that involves becoming a better listener. We need to train ourselves to listen to others and respond appropriately, instead of tuning out and only thinking about the points we want to make in the discussion. That way, you’ll be more than ready to mount a witty defense because you won’t be caught unaware.

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#13

This Is A Really Good Reply To Trump's Tweet

This Is A Really Good Reply To Trump's Tweet

El-Cobra Report

#14

Raw Skiny Jeans Bat

Raw Skiny Jeans Bat

Master1718 , RobbySlowik Report

Add photo comments
POST
Vic
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Batman: *punches a baddie..* *stops to sanitize hands before punching next guy*

Load More Replies...
Kitten claws
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Honestly, I don't think the world wants a raw unsanitized ANYTHING

i'll sleep when im dead
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes. That was a bad, bad choice of words. Raw, maybe. At a stretch. Not Sanitized? Seriously?

Harleen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The irony of this statement goes deeper when you realize Rob actually had Covid

Meyer Weinstock
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alex Hamilton
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The reason that China never do well at cricket is because they have eaten all the bats.

Katie
Community Member
3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

I only want to see how big the bulge in his pants is !

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#15

Useless Trees

Useless Trees

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#16

What An Awful Way To Protect The Elderly

What An Awful Way To Protect The Elderly

lucynyu13 , PressSec Report

#17

Rage Against Something

Rage Against Something

Camotoe Report

#18

Actions Speak Louder Than Words.

Actions Speak Louder Than Words.

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#19

Separate Payments

Separate Payments

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#20

They Also Don't Come In Exciting Anime

They Also Don't Come In Exciting Anime

TheRikari Report

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#21

Depression vs. Asthma

Depression vs. Asthma

TitaniumPeak Report

#22

Big Footprints To Fill

Big Footprints To Fill

mysteresc Report

#23

Not Mine But On Point

Not Mine But On Point

justinpwheeler , TheAccountOfSam Report

#24

Another Reason To Love The Beatles

Another Reason To Love The Beatles

simwalkedaway Report

#25

Elite Finish

Elite Finish

MythicalBeast263 Report

#26

Flameproofing? But My House Isn't On Fire!

Flameproofing? But My House Isn't On Fire!

ZacReligious Report

#27

Flat Earthers Make Me Happy Because I Know I'm Not A Complete Failure

Flat Earthers Make Me Happy Because I Know I'm Not A Complete Failure

svrmster103 , ashallowseafish Report

#28

Does This Count? The Author Actually Replied Back To Me Lmao

Does This Count? The Author Actually Replied Back To Me Lmao

turing042 , sahaj_amatya Report

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#29

That Last Line Though

That Last Line Though

livebythem Report

#30

Left vs. Right

Left vs. Right

reddit.com , twitter.com Report

#31

They Did Not See This Coming

They Did Not See This Coming

acagastya Report

#32

Columbus Day

Columbus Day

reddit.com Report

#33

Austin Powers Would Be Proud Of That Comeback

Austin Powers Would Be Proud Of That Comeback

IShallPetYourDogo , www.reddit.com Report

#34

'im Tired Of Being Responsible For Something That Is Entirely My Resposibility.'

'im Tired Of Being Responsible For Something That Is Entirely My Resposibility.'

Master1718 Report

#35

I Love Puns

I Love Puns

discordgamer101 Report

#36

Who’ll Email You When You Block Him

Who’ll Email You When You Block Him

reddit.com Report

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#37

Can't Get Any More Clever Than This

Can't Get Any More Clever Than This

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#38

Invasive Species

Invasive Species

MeesterNeusbaumTX Report

#39

Don’t Boast About Your Iq Test

Don’t Boast About Your Iq Test

leafy_avocado Report

#40

Oof! British People Be Like...

Oof! British People Be Like...

BelleAriel Report

#41

Honesty Is The Best Policy

Honesty Is The Best Policy

Tubergod1 Report

#42

I Mean, He's Not Wrong ..

I Mean, He's Not Wrong ..

MissTickleToes Report

#43

Depends On Who Writes The Comic

Depends On Who Writes The Comic

Master1718 Report

#44

Boomer vs. Millenial

Boomer vs. Millenial

buss123 Report

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#45

It’s Funny Because It’s True

It’s Funny Because It’s True

Gudakesa , Steph_I_Will Report

#46

She Isn’t A Walking Womb

She Isn’t A Walking Womb

PlatinumGamer55 Report

#47

Weird Motives

Weird Motives

Random_420-69 Report

#48

Especially Clever

Especially Clever

hydr0p0lis Report

#49

Facebook Comeback

Facebook Comeback

AkshayyChavan Report

#50

Quite Funny To Be Honest

Quite Funny To Be Honest

rahul4112 Report

Note: this post originally had 89 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.