Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

Add post form topAdd Post
Tooltip close

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

Woman Decides To Pick A Name For Her SIL’s Unborn Baby, Her Christmas Party Gets Boycotted In Return
1.2K

Woman Decides To Pick A Name For Her SIL’s Unborn Baby, Her Christmas Party Gets Boycotted In Return

Interview With Expert Woman Decides To Pick A Name For Her SIL's Unborn Baby, Her Christmas Party Gets Boycotted In Return Pregnant Woman Can’t Get Why SIL Decided Her Son’s Name For Her, Boycotts Her Christmas PartyExpecting Mom Shocked SIL Chose Name For Her Baby, Refuses To Attend Christmas Unless She Removes It Woman Writes ‘Tommy’ As Unborn Nephew’s Name On Stocking, SIL Refuses To Visit As It’s Not His NameWoman Keeps Calling Her Unborn Nephew ‘Tommy’, Is Surprised SIL Got Upset And Won’t Come For XmasSIL Insists Couple Name Their Unborn Son ‘Tommy’, Puts It On Stocking, Woman Refuses To VisitWoman Decides To Pick A Name For Her SIL's Unborn Baby, Her Christmas Party Gets Boycotted In Return Woman Decides To Pick A Name For Her SIL's Unborn Baby, Her Christmas Party Gets Boycotted In Return Woman Decides To Pick A Name For Her SIL's Unborn Baby, Her Christmas Party Gets Boycotted In Return Woman Decides To Pick A Name For Her SIL's Unborn Baby, Her Christmas Party Gets Boycotted In Return
ADVERTISEMENT

Have you noticed that as the holiday season approaches, family drama increases? I think spending too much time with your family has its drawbacks. Probably many of you will agree that as you rarely meet your extended family or in-laws, it’s possible to have a better relationship.

However, it’s nothing new that some people try to avoid this Christmas celebration chaos and simply choose to skip it. Well, this Reddit user will probably also be one of them – she shares that her sister-in-law decided that it was a good idea to name her unborn son and even made a stocking with this name. Now, the woman refuses to come until she changes it.

More info: Reddit

RELATED:

    The only right thing to do is to understand that naming a child is the parents’ responsibility and privilege they may or may not share

    Image credits: Дарья Рублева (not the actual photo)

    This woman shares that her SIL is usually nice with her, but after finding out she’s pregnant with a boy, her SIL insisted that she name him Tommy

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Nicole Michalou (not the actual photo) 

    She refused, as she has a different name in mind, and asked her SIL to respect her decision, to which she agreed

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Goran Grudic (not the actual photo) 

    However, her SIL is hosting Christmas for the family and she hung stockings with her kids’, nephews’ and nieces’ names and one of them was Tommy – for the woman’s son

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: u/Dear_Beyond8984

    Once she found out, there was a big fight and she refused to come to Christmas dinner if her SIL didn’t remove the stocking with the name Tommy

    A few days ago, a Reddit user shared her story online, asking community members if she was being a jerk for refusing to attend her in-laws’ Christmas party unless her sister-in-law removes a stocking that has a different name than the one she chose for her unborn son. The post caught a lot of attention and collected over 10.3K upvotes and 2.6K comments.

    To begin with, the original poster (OP) shares that her husband is pretty close with his sister and she’s also nice towards her, but seems a bit controlling sometimes. However, there were no issues until OP became pregnant. After finding out that they are going to have a boy, SIL insisted that they name him Tommy. OP has another name in mind, thus refused, and it looked like everyone understood.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Well, as it turned out – not really. The woman’s SIL, as usual, is hosting Christmas dinner this year, and OP was planning on coming until she discovered that her SIL had hung stockings with all the kids’ names, including ‘Tommy’ for her unborn son. Understandably, the woman lost it, which ended in a big fight and OP’s refusal to come to the Christmas dinner if she doesn’t remove it.

    OP’s husband wasn’t too happy about the whole situation and told OP that she was trying to ruin his important family tradition, that she can’t tell his sister what she can and what she can’t do. Thus, while the family is divided about the whole situation, OP still refuses to come but admits that she feels ashamed and asks people online if she overreacted.

    The community members gave the woman the ‘Not the A-hole’ badge, discussing that OP’s SIL is bullying her and her husband is supporting his sister. “Please be sure to speak to your nurses when you give birth. Let them know under NO circumstance is anyone allowed to fill out the paperwork without you,” one user wrote. “She doesn’t get to name your child. Ask your spineless spouse if he is intending to raise a baby with your sister, or with you,” another added.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Alex Green (not the actual photo)

    “When people outside of the married couple insist on a certain name for an unborn child, this selfish insistence can negatively affect all family relationships,” Dr. Carla Marie Manly, who is a clinical psychologist, life fulfillment expert, and author, shared with Bored Panda. She also notes that it’s important for family members to honor the sanctity of the married couple and their decisions.

    Now, speaking about unresolved family conflicts that may affect relationships, Dr. Carla emphasizes that they can have a wide-reaching impact on the overall family system. “If even one member of the family system creates havoc, the remaining members of the family are often negatively affected.”

    She notes that in general, any dysfunction within a family that is not resolved in a healthy way will create both short and long-term differences of varying degrees. And unfortunately, unresolved family rifts can create havoc that lasts for generations.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Finally, she says that in a healthy marriage, the partner’s first responsibility is to their spouse. “Especially given that Todd’s wife is well within her rights to choose the name of her unborn child, Todd would be wise to staunchly back his wife’s position.”

    “In many cases, unresolved issues from childhood tend to crop up in later years. It is possible that Todd’s sister is experiencing feelings of jealousy and a desire to exert control. Unfortunately, the sister’s actions may negatively impact her family relationships for many years to come,” Dr. Carla added.

    Of course, don’t forget to check out her podcast Imperfect Love, which you can find on all major podcast platforms and upcoming book The Joy of Imperfect Love!

    Redditors backed up the woman and assured her that she had every right to get mad

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    Share on Facebook
    Austėja Bliujūtė

    Austėja Bliujūtė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Hey there! I'm Austeja, a writer with a knack for capturing everything from family dramas to the latest meme trends at Bored Panda. Armed with a Bachelor's degree in business management, I blend expertise with creativity to deliver engaging articles. I love spicing up my pieces with insights from experts in the industry, ensuring the readers get interesting information. When I'm not typing away, you can find me jet-setting to sunny destinations, hunting for the perfect palm-fringed oasis, enjoying leisurely brunches with friends or binging various TV shows!

    Read less »
    Austėja Bliujūtė

    Austėja Bliujūtė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Hey there! I'm Austeja, a writer with a knack for capturing everything from family dramas to the latest meme trends at Bored Panda. Armed with a Bachelor's degree in business management, I blend expertise with creativity to deliver engaging articles. I love spicing up my pieces with insights from experts in the industry, ensuring the readers get interesting information. When I'm not typing away, you can find me jet-setting to sunny destinations, hunting for the perfect palm-fringed oasis, enjoying leisurely brunches with friends or binging various TV shows!

    Monika Pašukonytė

    Monika Pašukonytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I am a visual editor here. In my free time I enjoy the vibrant worlds of art galleries, exhibitions, and soulful concerts. Yet, amidst life's hustle and bustle, I find solace in nature's embrace, cherishing tranquil moments with beloved friends. Deep within, I hold a dream close - to embark on a global journey in an RV, accompanied by my faithful canine companion. Together, we'll wander through diverse cultures, weaving precious memories under the starry night sky, fulfilling the wanderlust that stirs my soul.

    Read less »

    Monika Pašukonytė

    Monika Pašukonytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I am a visual editor here. In my free time I enjoy the vibrant worlds of art galleries, exhibitions, and soulful concerts. Yet, amidst life's hustle and bustle, I find solace in nature's embrace, cherishing tranquil moments with beloved friends. Deep within, I hold a dream close - to embark on a global journey in an RV, accompanied by my faithful canine companion. Together, we'll wander through diverse cultures, weaving precious memories under the starry night sky, fulfilling the wanderlust that stirs my soul.

    What do you think ?
    Add photo comments
    POST
    Joey Jo Jo Shabadoo
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    People will call the cops on a homeless guy talking to himself on the street but will bend over backwards for the family abusive loon.

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, 2 choices: cave in for the sake of the "family" of which the members obviously don't respect you in return and be for evermore seen as a doormat or stand your ground, risk a huge fight but cleaning a festering wound. Don't be fooled: this a life-changing decision.

    Hphizzle
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Safest red flag: weird enmeshed sibling issues that could be helped with counseling. Potential serious red flag: sil could have actual obsession with op’s baby and could escalate to where safety is a concern for mom and baby. Either way, the first step is op holding strong to her boundaries. Do not back down. It may seem like a small hill to die on, but the effects will be detrimental for the future.

    Load More Comments
    Joey Jo Jo Shabadoo
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    People will call the cops on a homeless guy talking to himself on the street but will bend over backwards for the family abusive loon.

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, 2 choices: cave in for the sake of the "family" of which the members obviously don't respect you in return and be for evermore seen as a doormat or stand your ground, risk a huge fight but cleaning a festering wound. Don't be fooled: this a life-changing decision.

    Hphizzle
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Safest red flag: weird enmeshed sibling issues that could be helped with counseling. Potential serious red flag: sil could have actual obsession with op’s baby and could escalate to where safety is a concern for mom and baby. Either way, the first step is op holding strong to her boundaries. Do not back down. It may seem like a small hill to die on, but the effects will be detrimental for the future.

    Load More Comments
    You May Like
    Related on Bored Panda
    Related on Bored Panda
    Trending on Bored Panda
    Also on Bored Panda