“What The Hell”: Woman Gets A Chore Chart To Prove A Point To Husband
Interview With AuthorIf a couple can’t agree on the allocation of chores, their conflicts can cause resentment and tension that damages the entire relationship. So when Reddit user 4eversoulsraven realized that her husband wasn’t planning to stop complaining about her share of housework, she decided to illustrate the big picture in a way he couldn’t argue with. As the woman explained on the subreddit ‘Petty Revenge,’ she bought a chart and started tracking everything that she was doing, making it clear just how much effort she was putting into maintaining their home.
Maintaining a tidy home requires clear communication, mutual respect, and a fair distribution of responsibilities
Image credits: RDNE Stock project / pexels (not the actual photo)
But this couple couldn’t agree on their chores
So the woman started tracking hers
Image credits: RDNE Stock project / pexels (not the actual photo)
In the end, it worked
Image credits: 4eversoulsraven
A lot of women are in a similar position to this one
We got in touch with 4eversoulsraven and she told Bored Panda that with her marriage, as with any other relationship, there are ups and downs.
“Over the past decade, it feels as though there are more downs than ups,” the Redditor said. “One of the factors that led to my husband’s midlife crisis was that my career was making him feel like a failure as a man.”
She explained that “as he worked through this by being separated, he realized that he did not want to leave me,” so the couple “started working on the marriage to fix things.”
“However, it seems that since he has no control over his life choices and a career, he wants to have control over everything and tries to find something to complain about.”
“I was getting annoyed after trying to explain to him that I do things more than him, without having to be told to do chores,” she added. “He did not believe me so I bought a chore chart to prove a point, which upset him.”
“We talked through some of the stressors and agreed to split the chores more evenly and that the other party cannot complain if something is not completed.”
Image credits: SHVETS production / pexels (not the actual photo)
The share of men who are the primary or sole breadwinners in their families has fallen as women have entered the labor force in large numbers, broken into lucrative occupations, and outpaced men in educational attainment.
In the United States, for example, 29% of marriages were “egalitarian” in 2022, with husbands and wives each contributing roughly half of the couple’s combined earnings. For context, it was just about 10% in 1972.
However, wives are still running around the house more.
In 2022, the average American adult — men and women combined — did 34 minutes per day of housework, which equates to a pay of $19.69. That comes out to a total of 208 hours (8.7 days) and $7,188 per year.
However, when analyzed by gender, results show that the typical woman completes $6,431 more of unpaid labor than men annually — men do an average of 19 minutes per day (or 4.7 days and $3,909 worth of household chores every year), while women do an average of 49 minutes per day (or 7.8 days and $10,341 worth per year).
“It takes commitment and communication to make things work, and even though it’s not easy, we’re trying,” the author of the post told us. “Currently, I would say we are stagnant, but I am hoping we grow stronger.”
As the story went viral, its author provided more information on her relationship
And people had a lot to say about it
Poll Question
Thanks! Check out the results:
If you're working FT and the other one doesn't have a job, well, it's not unreasonable to expect that person to take at least a passing interest in keeping a house liveable.
This! My husband did that during the one or two short times he was between jobs. I did the same when I was between jobs. When we’re both working, we split chores. Why is it so hard for some people to understand about equity in a relationship? This isn’t the fifties, and women aren’t June Cleaver, ffs. Besides, she was fiction. My mother was a housewife her entire married life, from 1941 to 2001 when she died (at 80), and I can tell you for a fact that she did NOT vacuum while wearing a designer dress, heels, a f*****g girdle, and a string of pearls! When she cleaned house, she was wearing casual clothing. When she did the spring cleaning, she wore her grubbies, and the entire family pitched in and cleaned too! That included my father. Luckily, he actually liked to vacuum and dust. Not bad for a man born in 1917.
Load More Replies...My husband often doesn't see what needs to be done. It's infuriating, but I try to keep that in mind. He literally can't see that the floors need to be vacuumed. He's gotten better, and he'll often jump up to do it when I say, "I need to vacuum." Not sure why I'm sharing this, just felt like it.
I think this is why chore wheels can work, even in healthy relationships. I'm someone that also doesn't always notice things. Having something set for me to do, at (or within) a certain time is great because my brain like a checklist and that helps me get it done.
Load More Replies...She's working full time and he is still expecting her to do stuff instead of looking after her? What is he for? Nothing here for her. Just a lazy man baby.
If you're working FT and the other one doesn't have a job, well, it's not unreasonable to expect that person to take at least a passing interest in keeping a house liveable.
This! My husband did that during the one or two short times he was between jobs. I did the same when I was between jobs. When we’re both working, we split chores. Why is it so hard for some people to understand about equity in a relationship? This isn’t the fifties, and women aren’t June Cleaver, ffs. Besides, she was fiction. My mother was a housewife her entire married life, from 1941 to 2001 when she died (at 80), and I can tell you for a fact that she did NOT vacuum while wearing a designer dress, heels, a f*****g girdle, and a string of pearls! When she cleaned house, she was wearing casual clothing. When she did the spring cleaning, she wore her grubbies, and the entire family pitched in and cleaned too! That included my father. Luckily, he actually liked to vacuum and dust. Not bad for a man born in 1917.
Load More Replies...My husband often doesn't see what needs to be done. It's infuriating, but I try to keep that in mind. He literally can't see that the floors need to be vacuumed. He's gotten better, and he'll often jump up to do it when I say, "I need to vacuum." Not sure why I'm sharing this, just felt like it.
I think this is why chore wheels can work, even in healthy relationships. I'm someone that also doesn't always notice things. Having something set for me to do, at (or within) a certain time is great because my brain like a checklist and that helps me get it done.
Load More Replies...She's working full time and he is still expecting her to do stuff instead of looking after her? What is he for? Nothing here for her. Just a lazy man baby.
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