45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal”

What’s ‘normal’ for you and your family or us might be completely weird for someone else. And vice versa! That ‘someone’ might live nearby in your neighborhood. But the way their relatives behave at home might be completely at odds with your own experience. Whether for good or ill.
Inspired by user u/itsbilliebrown, the members of the popular r/AskAnAustralian online group opened up about their childhood experiences. They revealed what traditions and behaviors they thought were completely normal, only to later realize other households did things very differently. Read on for their candid stories, ranging from the hilarious to the heartbreaking.

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45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Its not necessarily "not normal" as a lot of people have it.

But i didnt realise for awhile that not *everyone* has 2 loving parents who still love each other.
i was blessed in this way.

Ok_Anteater7360 , Chino Rocha Report

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260points

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45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Having an abusive alcoholic father. I seriously thought all men were like that.

Story time:

I remember a moment when I was 13 years old and I was at a party of my dad’s friend. I didn’t know anyone there except my dad. I wanted to go home because it was late and I was tired. My dad was drinking heavily as usual and said we’re sleeping there and to go to sleep on their couch and that was that. I was very upset and just wanted to sleep in my own bed and not in a strangers house. I started crying while I was trying to fall asleep and one of my dad’s friend’s sons who was in his 20’s came up to me and asked if I was okay and if I needed anything. I explained that I wanted to go home and I felt uncomfortable sleeping there. He listened and acknowledged my feelings. He offered to play a song on his guitar to lighten my mood. I gladly accepted. Then he left me alone once I assured him I was okay. I fell asleep after that.

While at first I was a little nervous to talk to a strange man in a strangers house, I was honestly shocked that he was being so nice and not dismissing my feelings. I genuinely didn’t think men were like this. That man was nicer to me in that moment than my father had ever been. I’m really grateful for him because he really changed my perspective on men at such a crucial time in my life.

Plastic_Watch_9285 , Josh Willink Report

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239points

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45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Pre bedtime cup of tea. Every night around 9pm we all will sat back down at the dining table and drink tea in proper tea set. My dad will also sometimes cut up a baguette and we will have it with butter and jam dipped in tea, otherwise whatever cookies/snacks around.
I used to really enjoy this time, its like a lot calmer dinner time. After tea time then we all will go to bed. Only realise its not a thing when i moved out.

Glum-Row-6227 , Drew Jemmett Report

Final score:

222points

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According to NCHS, family traditions form a strong foundation and give kids a sense of stability and predictability. These traditions make children feel connected with their families and like they belong. The result is that they grow up with a stronger sense of identity, higher self-esteem, and overall better mental health.

Probably the best way to get a sense of what society considers ‘normal’ is to spend more time around other people. If you went to your friends’ homes after school or had sleepovers, then you probably noticed how awkward everything can be. It’s very likely that their parents had different routines, rituals, and ways of talking to each other. Some things feel… slightly ‘off.’

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” That some kids couldn't tell if there was a problem the second they woke up.

There is a feeling, a "vibe" when dad was in a mood. The quiet is very particular.

Spiral-knight , Jp Valery Report

Final score:

188points

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45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Being told no to everything like going over to a friend's house. It got to the point I didn't bother asking anymore. Both my parents have since died and, whilst cleaning out the family home, I found a letter from my primary school expressing concern that I had no deep connection to any kids in the school and that it was unusual that a kid my age (8) didn't have at least one close friend.

Scissorbreaksarock , Mikhail Nilov Report

Final score:

166points

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Michelle C 5 months ago

💔

81points

Donna Peluda 5 months ago

Once I got older I just stopped asking for permission. I hid things from my mum, not bad things just like going to a friend's house with a pool, if I got caught then I took the beating. Still worth it. One day I realised I was big enough to hit back, didn't hang around long after that

11points

Marnie 5 months ago (edited)

My son had a friend in school he really, really liked. Met him in school, found out he lived one block over. He asked many times if they could play together, but his parents would not let him play outside, would not let him go to someone else's house, and wouldn't let any kids come in. That poor, poor kid. They were refugees, Hmong I think. I just wonder if they were terrified of this strange world they ended up escaping to with their lives. Many of the Hmong arrived in a very traumatized state, and those wounds don't heal quickly, if ever. I hope that kid is doing okay now.

9points

Zaach 5 months ago

I grew up sleeping in the basement - was seldom upstairs with the family

8points

LakotaWolf (she/her) 5 months ago

<3 I'm so sorry, friend. I know how you feel - we didn't have a basement (Southern California, basements aren't common) but I had to sleep on a couch in the back room of the house. Everyone else's bedrooms were upstairs. (I'm adopted and my sister is my parents' bio child.) I hope you sleep in whatever room/area of your living space that you dang well please, now :)

7points

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Jo Firth 5 months ago

That was my life until I left home at 20!! I will never know what it was like to have after school friends. I wasn't even allowed to go across the road to play with the kids there, and they were never allowed in our yard. So strange in hindsight, but at the time I didn't know any better.

4points

David 5 months ago

that is so abusive to a child. I remember as a kid having friends over, or going to a friends house, sleepovers, etc

2points

Grace Knowlton 5 months ago

My mom was so controlling that we weren't even allowed to ask for Christmas presents or what type of cake we wanted for birthdays or even something that we actually NEEDED like new school supplies or clothes for that matter

2points

Daniela Lavanza 5 months ago

Bad parenting at its worst.

2points

Whitkat 4 months ago

We were properly broke when I was in elementary school. So broke we couldn't eat at times. We were told not to ask for anything. " If you really need it and we can manage it you'll have it." I was 10 when my teacher told me to stay after class. I knew I hadn't misbehaved so it was confusing. She waited until all the other children were gone then walked me home carrying a large box. As it turned out it was a care package from the school with food and essentials. It was the first time one of them did something overtly kind for me.

1point

Thomas Hunt, Jr. 5 months ago

I grew up friendless. It wasn't that my parents said no..it was that I was the school outcast. I was below the last tier. I didn't fit in anywhere. If anything, teachers and parents tried to push me into social events. Alas, all that did was make me retreat within myself.

1point

Fergus Corgi 5 months ago

Parents think they're protecting their kids from harm but they are the ones doing the damage.

1point

JustAnotherPanda (she/they/he) 5 months ago

Same.

1point

robin aldrich 5 months ago

Oh...noooo...I hope this person got help to heal that wound....hugs to them...

1point

Liz 4 months ago

I had zero peer interaction until college. I was homeschooled and there was only one other family in church with kids, all of whom were younger than me. I had siblings (again, all younger than me) and that was it. I knew it wasn't entirely normal when I started to watch movies that had grounding as a punishment. No wonder I was depressed; my normal was something most parents used as a temporary punishment. But even so, it took me over a decade after graduation to realize that was actually bad parenting, because they had successfully convinced me that all other parents were worse than them.

0points

Magenta Blu 5 months ago

0points

TrippyBanana 5 months ago

My step-dad made fun of my friends or asked them to babysit so I just stopped bringing anyone around. I didn't want my friends to co-parent my siblings when I was already doing it too.

0points

Nykky 5 months ago

Oh hey, welcome to the nonexistent party.

0points

Yo Momma 5 months ago

I do not let my daughter spend the night at someone's house unless I have hung out with them before hand, multiple times, and gotten to know them. No, you can not 100% know anyone, but I feel more comfortable if I have been to their house hanging out, they have been to mine, I know their family, etc. I was SA'd at a friends house when I was sleeping over and I refuse to let my daughter go through that. She can have her friends over anytime and they can stay over.

0points

hockeygorl 5 months ago

my mom almost never lets me go to ppls houses but she’s just worried so i don’t take it too hard but i get left out of everything cuz of it

0points

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45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” My mum baked a lot and I often had "unusual" cakes/pastries (apple strudel, bee sting cake) at recess at school. Other kids would want to try some and whenever friends came over my mum would serve cake or make scones for afternoon tea and put some chips in a bowl. Everyone was like "omg that cake your mum made was so good!"

But for me home made cake and baked goods were just the norm. Probably a very European thing, but no one else's mum did that!

Armadillocat42 , Life Of Pix Report

Final score:

157points

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Similarly, your friends probably thought the same thing when they came over to your own place. When we’re stuck in our comfort zones and routines, we hardly ever consider that other folks might live very differently from us. What’s ‘normal’ for us is simply what we’re used to. It’s what we see every day.

When we step outside our family or social bubble, we realize that life is very paradoxical. On the one hand, everyone’s daily lives can be quite different from what we’re used to. On the other hand, many things remain fundamentally the same. No matter what part of the world you live in, what your culture and background is, you’re still a human being. We tend to have lots in common, once we move past our superficial differences. Our traditions might be different, but at their core lies our love for our family members.

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Having cereal for dinner.

I grew up with divorced parents, and lived with my single Dad. At the time he was a full time uni student and also trying to work full time as an office assistant, didn’t have much money nor a lot of time to go proper grocery shopping or cook. Almost every night dinner was a bowl of cereal, with the exception of “special occasions” where we would either walk to the local McDonalds for a happy meal or get a dominoes pizza delivered.

Wasn’t till I was about 11 years old at my first sleep over at a friends house where his parents called us for dinner, I was expecting to see a bowl of cereal on the table, but was massively confused at this meat and veg dinner that was in front of me. I remember going home thinking their dinner was weird.

Wasn’t till I was about 16 once dad graduated uni and got a job at a law firm and actually had money and time do go shopping and cook and therefore started making us “normal dinners”, that I realised cereal for dinner was not normal.

maxfaulkner , Binyamin Mellish Report

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143points

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45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Being able to sleep anywhere, with any level of noise.

My Dad was in a covers duo, and on Fri and Sat nights he would take us kids to his gigs and we would find somewhere to curl up and sleep once it hit about 9pm. Usually under a table, or in some padded chairs. He was never organised enough to actually PLAN to have us there, but we worked it out, and I can't say I hated it.

He also played golf at least 3 afternoons a week and would leave us at the clubhouse while he played 9-18 holes. We did our homework, played in the clubhouse, built sandcastles in the sandtrap near the clubhouse (when no-one was playing onto that green), and learned to putt like demons.

He's bloody lucky we were such good kids. There was a LOT of inattention paid, so we could have gotten up to some real mischief. But we didn't. :)

learningbythesea , Kinga Howard Report

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128points

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The five of us talking about state of the art new developments in science at the dinner table.

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114points

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The exact traditions you foster aren’t as important as the fact that you have some traditions in the first place. They can be something as simple as eating dinner together every Sunday or entirely silly like doing a talent contest on the same day every year. They can be taken from earlier generations of your family or created from scratch to fit your life better. It’s also a lot of fun if you involve your children in creating these traditions. After all, they’re going to be a part of them (hopefully) their entire lives.

What are your favorite family traditions, dear Pandas? What did you think was ‘normal’ in your home, only to realize how bizarre it was later down the line? How different was the daily life in your friends’ homes? If you’re feeling up to it, share your thoughts in the comment section at the bottom of this post.

#10

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Slaps in public and when friends were over. My family was the only family I knew that regularly hit us as kids, most other kids had been occasionally slapped or smacked, but *really* infrequently. We sometimes got slapped at school gatherings and other parents always looked horrified.

IIIlllIIIlllIlI , cottonbro studio Report

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108points

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#11

Being told "no" all the time. Not being able to talk at the dinner table, when visiting grandparents, other relatives houses ("sit there and be quiet"). It was bad enough I was never spoken to otherwise. Mine took "children should be seen and not heard" to a another level.

Being on edge all the time wondering when either I ne of my parents were going to unleash their explosive behaviour. Not being able to gave a joke with my parents without them thinking it was disrespectful - visiting other friends' houses as a teen I was jealous of the way they interacted with their parents, laughing and making jokes.

I could never have an opinion, could never h ave a discussion about any topic without being called names.

Even now I find it hard to have a conversation with any one new that I meet.

When my sister divorced (her kids were 1 and 5) they would rather see her destitute than help - and I don't mean financially. I see at my kids's school grandparents who are involved and help by babysitting whilst the parents go to work. Mine didn't help her so she could work, however my father financially helped his deadbeat leech of a brother. He also gave a car to my gambling aunty (mum's sister). But no help for my sister. She managed to get through though....

Could go on......

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108points

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#12

A kind loving family that looked out for eachother. No toxicity, no drama, no b******t.

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104points

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#13

My mother “stonewalling” us everytime she was angry or upset with us.

I thought this was normal behaviour and it has affected my ability to have healthy relationships because I never really learned how to have difficult conversations, I just shut down everytime something is upsetting or feels too hard.

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101points

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#14

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” When I was young (8 and under) my house always had a particular smell. And only one of my friend’s houses smelled just like mine did.

Fast forward to being a teenager: weed. My house always smelled like weed when my father was around 🤣.

Roma_lolly , Aubrey Odom Report

Final score:

99points

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#15

Having a pet kangaroo who slept on the bed and ate with the dogs. She also wore a cat collar.

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98points

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#16

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Having zombies in the hall, sleepy zombies who we were never allowed to touch or they would wake up and eat our brains . . . Turns out they were homeless junkies , good call mom.

Soft_Eggplant9132 , Clay LeConey Report

Final score:

95points

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#17

Complaints whenever i would ask to be driven somewhere or dropped off at a friends house. my siblings whine and argue or make up a lie to make sure they will never drive me anywhere and i have to get to places on my own no matter how difficult it is by public transport.

then when i was 16 i was at a friend’s house and said i’ll catch a bus home. he refused, asked his brother once and he immediately said “yeah sure. when do you want to leave”

happened again at another friend’s house, then another, everyone was so chill and i began to realise it’s just my siblings.

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#18

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Getting belted regularly for little things like forgetting to vacuum. Raising my siblings. First jobs, giving all but bus money to help with family. My mother had me convinced that, as the oldest, it was my responsibility to look after them when they retire. I was about 14 when I found out that was a lie lol.

clumsyglammagrandma , Sofía Marquet Report

Final score:

91points

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#19

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” We regularly ate “egg bread”. I didn’t hear the term French toast until after I finished school.

BrotherBroad3698: My parents called it ~eggy toast~ and I now call it the same with my own kids.

winoforever_slurp_ , Crystal Jo Report

Final score:

89points

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#20

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” My dad cooking. Not many dads cooked.

Scuh , CDC Report

Final score:

89points

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#21

Never having a book read to you by a parent. Now that I am one all of my kids gets 2 books minimum every night. I don't think I even had 2 books read to me in my whole childhood. .

DiamondDanah Report

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89points

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#22

That "beatings will continue until morale improves" is supposed to be a joke, not a daily experience.

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#23

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Moving houses almost every year, trying to find the cheapest place to live. Also d***s, I was introduced to it in primary school and my friends didn't even know what they were at the time.

e_castille: Having to move schools every year was rough. I began high school the most popular girl in my grade and by the time I graduated (five schools later) everyone knew me as a loner. It became a lot more difficult to make friends over time, and I just didn’t see the point anymore when I knew I was going to move on eventually.

ConezzzBrah , cottonbro studio Report

Final score:

84points

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#24

My family poops big. Maybe it's genetic, maybe it's our diet, but everyone births giant logs of c**p. If anyone has laid a mega-poop, you know that sometimes it won't flush. It lays across the hole in the bottom of the bowl and the vortex of draining water merely gives it a spin as it mocks you.

Growing up, this was a common enough occurrence that our family had a poop knife. It was an old rusty kitchen knife that hung on a nail in the laundry room, only to be used for that purpose. It was normal to walk through the hallway and have someone call out "hey, can you get me the poop knife"?

I thought it was standard kit. You have your plunger, your toilet brush, and your poop knife.

So said LearnedButt.

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81points

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#25

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Had 2 mums in the 80s. Didn't figure out that wasn't a normal thing till I got to highschool.

bottleofgoop , Anna Shvets Report

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77points

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#26

That counting wads of cash (d**g money), for my illiterate dad, at the age of 12 because I was the smart one is not normal. Going to d**g deals was not a normal Saturday morning thing for most kids.
Just d***s in general, I got so accustomed to it that I thought all the kids parents were in on it.

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76points

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#27

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” My parents used to make me sleep outside as a punishment, like on the back patio. I casually mentioned it to my entire English class and they were all mortified lol 🤣.

jp72423 , Emily Park Report

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73points

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#28

That being cornered and beaten wasn't 'regular discipline'.

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71points

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#29

Everyone walks around naked. Literally rips clothes off at the door. It was never sexual. I was never abused.

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70points

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#30

Taking your shoes off, and changing into home clothes. Knowing your parents income, household costs and budgeting.
Actually maybe it is normal, I don't know. Do kids these days know costs of rent etc...?

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66points

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#31

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” I didn't realise that not everyone automatically turns off lights when they leave a room/area. My dad drilled it into us when we were kids. When I went to other kid's houses, I was astonished that they had all the lights on all the time. I thought it was NUTS and that their parents must be really rich to afford the power bill.

bl00ph00h00: My Mum was really electricity conscious but we had some energy saving bulbs that apparently took the same amount of energy to turn off and on as to run for four hours continuously? So the rules in our house were like: Always turn the lights off, unless you think someone else will enter the room in the next four hours, in which case leave them on.

Helen_Magnus_ , Francesca Tosolini Report

Final score:

65points

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#32

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” In kindy I would use Swedish words that I picked up from my grandparents, I couldn’t grasp why the other kids didn’t understand when I would use these words. I had no idea it was another language.

denkapuma: I got into a whole argument with another kid in kindergarten about the pomegranate I brought in as a snack one day. I'd only ever heard the Arabic word for it up until that point. [I had] no clue I wasn't saying the English name

not_the_chosen_onee: I grew up with first generation parents so that meant to little me that everyone else’s parents were also first generation. The idea that some of my friends could only speak English used to shock me, like what do you mean you don’t have native language? Or like your own culture/ food at home. No one's just Australian, right?

Ok_Metal6112 , Max Goncharov Report

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60points

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#33

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Being told 'no' so often. When I was at friend's houses, I would see how easy going their parents were.

restlessoverthinking , Juliane Liebermann Report

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57points

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#34

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” My family has this really long ritual that involves singing multiple songs, clapping and chants when celebrating someones birthday. Most other people just sing Happy Birthday and leave it at that.

Examples include hip hip hooray, for he/she is a jolly good fellow, why was he/she born so beautiful...and clapping while counting out the age. Most other people just sing Happy Birthday and leave it at that.

_EnFlaMEd , Bambi Corro Report

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57points

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#35

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Mum giving us a flannelette pillowcase each when we had colds to wipe our noses with - saved on tissues and was much softer. Husband thought it was the most disgusting thing he ever saw the first time I did it 🤣.

WombatBum85 , Castorly Stock Report

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56points

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#36

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” BBQs never involved Salad. 63yo & still it's Meat on Bread with Sauce.

When I was young Adult venturing out on my own, first saw Salad at a BBQ, thought "That's weird ".

Party_Thanks_9920 , Paul Hermann Report

Final score:

49points

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#37

Alcoholism.

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#38

Farting out loud and everyone finding it funny

I fart a lot, when I was young I’d just rip my farts out loud and no one said anything, then I did it at other people’s and they called me out on it.

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#39

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” My father was a control freak about decor. I only realised when my mother left him that it was not usual for a stay at home mother not to have at least 50 percent control over decisions about furniture, towels, cushions, plates, glasses, etc.

worker_ant_6646: When we were 17, my ex's dad flew off the handle one time we made footprints in the freshly vacuumed carpet before he did. We also went into the formal lounge room and rearranged the decor on the coffee table. It still looked neat and tidy but the ducks were swapped with the coasters and it was unacceptable. My ex was grounded for a week.

Cethlinnstooth , Spacejoy Report

Final score:

46points

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#40

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” Raspberry cordial and milk. Crushed disprin with jam. Pillowcases at the end of the bed to put Christmas or birthday presents in.

AnnaSoprano: My mum did crushed Panadol in honey for me.

Ok-Computer-1033 , Barbara Chowaniec Report

Final score:

46points

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#41

A communal sock basket ... I still laugh about it now, it's not like we shared socks, everyone had their own but they were all in a basket in the loungeroom and it was like a watering hole.

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#42

Dads were there to smack you up and mothers were there to love and hugs you

Good cop bad cop sort of thing.

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42points

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#43

We played Murder In The Dark. Not just us two siblings, mum n dad as well.

Lost a few friends to being caught by one of us weirdos creepy crawling through our darkened house.

Sounds bad, but I promise you that it was harmless. Until mum caught you and breathed her ciggie breath in your face.

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42points

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#44

45 Strange Childhood Realities People Later Learned Were Far From “Normal” How controlled our food was.

Partly a whole heap of family allergies followed by I think fear that if we weren’t eating super healthy then something bad would happen, I’m not really sure to be honest. I do remember being amazed that friends were allowed juice and other sugary stuff.

ScaryMouchy , Ella Olsson Report

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41points

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#45

Both of my parents grew up in Asia, and they store cooked meat in the oven/microwave or a cooked pot of food on the stove, not in the fridge. And I’m talking for a few days.

It honestly wasn’t until I was an adult and started house sharing that I learned about the fear of meat being left out or stored properly.

I was never sick as a child from this practice and I’ve learned the only other people who think this isn’t insane behaviour are people who also have parents from similar regions. .

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41points

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Storytelling, journalism, and art are a core part of who I am. I've been writing and drawing ever since I could walk—there is nothing else I'd rather do. My formal education, however, is focused on politics, philosophy, and economics because I've always been curious about the gap between the ideal and the real. At work, I'm a Senior Writer and I cover a broad range of topics that I'm passionate about: from psychology and changes in work culture to healthy living, relationships, and design. In my spare time, I'm an avid hiker and reader, enjoy writing short stories, and love to doodle. I thrive when I'm outdoors, going on small adventures in nature. However, you can also find me enjoying a big mug of coffee with a good book (or ten) and entertaining friends with fantasy tabletop games and sci-fi movies.

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Hey there! I'm Shelly, a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. When I'm not working, you'll often find me immersed in creativity, whether it's creating animations, 3D and traditional art, writing, or making music.I've been drawing since I was little, and my passion for visual storytelling really took off after I finished a 2-year Film Academy. It ignited my existing spark for bringing stories to life through visuals. Since then, I've been diving deeper into art and tech, always exploring new ways to tell compelling stories.

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What do you think ?

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Ephemera Image 5 months ago

Parents should really be licensed and have to pass a test. Whether just clueless or abusive.

20points

Gavin Johnson 5 months ago

I had no idea how idyllic my childhood was. We sat down for a meal at the table at 6pm every day, you best have a good reason for not being there, M&D and my brother and I would talk about the events of our day, my M&D both worked but we were always with an adult outside school times, we shared time together every weekend, visited museums, hiked in the hills, swam in rivers, we were loved and my folks were and are still a loving couple, they are now Grandparents 😀 we lived a relatively simple family life, we weren’t rich but we always had food to eat, but I had no idea how easy life was until I spread my wings at 15-16 and met reality. My Mum and Dad worked hard but gave my brother and I all the time they could spare and we were extremely lucky to have all the love we could ever wish for, I owe them more than I can ever repay!

19points

Auntriarch 5 months ago

Its the best isn't it?❤️

3points

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Diego 5 months ago

My parents were absolutely horrible. Unpacking all my childhood trauma in therapy left me as a shell of a person. I hope to see my parents in hell one day. I'll never forget how much they put me down and made me feel like I was worthless. Jokes on them. I made it, I'm a scientist and the director of my department and make great money and have an amazing life....

13points

Roman Hans 5 months ago (edited)

Same: horrible childhood full of hatred. My family made me think I was the problem, for fifteen years. Then I left home. Their lives continued to stink while mine turned incredible, just full of love, so now we know who was at fault. Hugs to Pandas with crummy childhoods!

7points

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Tamra 5 months ago

The best revenge is a life well-lived. Well done, you!

4points

Sobri Kate 5 months ago

Hell is on earth. Your parents were also in their own private hell and they spread the suffering to you. You ended the cycle of generational trauma.

2points

Rai Serl 5 months ago

I got one: an awful marriage. My parents were miserable. They fought... just... CONSTANTLY. My grandparents "put on a good face", but when I spent the night at their house, it was hard not to notice my grandpa sleeping in the living room. Even my aunts and uncles would argue in front of me. When I would see married people who actually seemed happy, I thought they were just "putting on a good face". Really screwed up my take on relationships for a long time.

10points

Zoe's Mom 5 months ago

May go to H3ll for this, but counting down the days until my mother passes.

7points

Tamra 5 months ago

There's this general belief that parents should always deserve respect, love, and devotion. This is absolutely not always true. Don't feel guilty. Some people absolutely do not deserve to have children.

3points

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Laserleader 5 months ago (edited)

With good enough reasons you would be bound for heaven. I always wondered how I would actually feel, and then my Dad passed at the start of this month, all I could do was laugh in great relief... like a nightmare chapter had ended and I no longer had to worry who he could be molesting under his ignorant 2nd wife's nose.

2points

Littlemiss 5 months ago

Yep me too. You aren't alone there.

1point

Kristal 5 months ago

Why would you go to a bad place for that?

1point

Kristal 5 months ago

It wasn't until I was in my 30s that I realized it was NOT normal to freak out over water being spilled on the carpet. I thought I was weird for feeling it wasn't a big deal.

6points

Momifer 5 months ago

Not tearing wrapping paper so it can be reused.

6points

Bec 5 months ago

Omw side of my extended family was a go around the room and open one gift at a time (which we also did in my immediate family) and the other side was every one just rips into gifts as soon as they are handed out.

3points

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Auntriarch 5 months ago

We do that if it's really cute or expensive paper

1point

Diolla 5 months ago

I used to know many ppl who do this.

1point

Julie Chamberlin 5 months ago

Two things come to mind: Number one: I never knew kids would actually talk to their parents about important/sensitive things, especially as teenagers. We only shared that kind of information with our friends. As a parent, it thrills me that my children come to me with their problems, concerns and questions. Number two: I know that blessing people when they sneeze is a totally common thing that people do. However, partly because my family are atheists, and partly because we all have allergies, we all think this is very weird and hate it when people do it. It seems very strange to us that this particular bodily function is acknowledged when no others are. In fact, my oldest (29) has taken to blessing people when they fart. I love it. 🤣

5points

day light 5 months ago (edited)

I'm from an atheist family and for some reason, I didn't really learn about religion until I was around 10 or 12 (I guess it just didn't interest me). I always thought "bless you" was actually "beshu" like... an onomatopoeia for the sneeze itself. not in a mockingly, more in a kinship sort of way. I still say it that way because it's normal enough to pass, but it's my mini protest against religion being forced down my throat

1point

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Brian Beck 5 months ago

I had a panic attack at about age 10 at a friend's house because the phone rang and none answered it. I answered the phone because in my house if you don't answer the phone and take notes you're getting yelled at and/or hit.

5points

Brenda 5 months ago

My family would hide from visitors. I remember lying on the floor of the dining room when some religious types came to the door to share their gospel. I still have dreams about the front door not being locked and strangers just walking into the house. Didn't know this wasn't normal until I became an adult.

5points

Laserleader 5 months ago

It was normal for my mother to talk to them on the front lawn for 3-4 hours, in an attempt to convert THEM away from their practices and join hers. We got black listed and they would pass by after several years of that.

4points

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Kris 5 months ago

The nude thing I think is more normal than people realise. I was raised in a nudist home and grew up to be very body positive. How your body looks does not define you. Im still a nudist at home but do put on clothes when I have guests out of respect for them.

4points

Guess Undheit 5 months ago

I could write a textbook on abusive and abnormal behaviour. Of the negative ones listed, I experienced half.

4points

bbfa 5 months ago

Only daughter in the 1960's. Slammed for any opinion. Never remember being hugged or touched by my mother. Couldn't stand my verbally abusive narcissistic father who beat my little dog. Mother who made up stories about my friends trying to drive a wedge then gaslighting, and writing nasty letters about perceived behavior to my friend's parents who distanced themselves. To this day I don't make strong emotional connections with people because I had to protect and hide every thought, emotion, or opinion. Married 40 years to a good man but still have a big protective wall and emotional distance and hide my thoughts about lots of things.

3points

Joy 5 months ago

Grew up in a violent household. Was told that it was just "spanking" and that it was "in the bible". Yeah, with my mom making me wear sweatshirts in the heat of summer to cover up my bruises was apparently normal too.

3points

Littlemiss 5 months ago

I learned from other kids at school it wasn't normal to buy your own lunch from 6 or be told you didn't deserve foods or lunch materials, those were for working people like my Dad and brother. Apparently I was responsible for my mother's feelings and all mistakes or missing items in the house. Abuse was normal and you weren't allowed to tell people. If you did, you were telling stories and making the family look bad. I apparently asked to be molested and was just attention seeking.

2points

Justbecause 5 months ago

That adults can't read your mind and the there are no consequences for thinking bad thoughts about people.

2points

NoName 5 months ago (edited)

My sister and I used to joke about it, because it's one of those laugh or you'll cry kind of situations lol a bunch of comedians we are now... surely a trauma response, but I digress. I never really got the chance to grow my hair out when I was a young girl, because one of my mom's favorite punishments was to chop our hair off. Like all of it. I would get mistaken for a boy. Very Mommie Dearest 😳 I could go on. Gen Xers are just a different breed. The crazy shite we can laugh off because it's uncomfortable otherwise lol My mother also implemented the hair comb that was by Goody and had the handle and thick teeth. Yeah, those hurt. The wooden spoon. Mix that with being raised on Tim Burton movies and 80s horror. It explains a lot really.

1point

NoName 5 months ago

I forgot to mention that my sister and I (48 and 44, respectively) are not allowed to joke about it around her anymore. It makes her really uncomfortable. Also, I love my curly hair that is down to my butt when it's dry. Kinda my baby now lol

1point

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Jane Shead 5 months ago

I remember being new in this country in elementary school and bringing quiche and a thermos of consomme for lunch. So much wanted a pbj on white bread!

1point

ZombieMommy 4 months ago

No talking about money, turning off lights, getting in trouble for falling asleep on the couch, grounded for weeks for being a minute passed curfew, shamed for emotions and crying. Have tons of anxiety when I hear mumbling or yelling. Good times.

0points

Nykky 5 months ago (edited)

Looking through this is almost like looking in a mirror for the bad parts. Not the physically abusive ones, but I think that was mostly because my soul was beaten to a pulp and I've never truly recovered from it. Nor will I ever. Circumstances outside of my control made it so life shoved me under its thumb, and it'll never be great. I feel for a lot of people on this list.

0points

vodoyox 5 months ago

I have made $15000 in one month by working from home.When I lost my office job 5 months ago, I was very upset and an unsuccessful try for a job hunt I was found this online job and now I am able to earn thousands from home. Everybody can do this job and earn more dollars online by follow this site.. GOOD LUCK.:) HERE ====)>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐝𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐫𝟏𝟐.𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐭.𝐜𝐨𝐦

-2points

Brian & Carol Roberts 5 months ago

SALES PITCH!!!

0points

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KaraEdwards 5 months ago

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POST

Ephemera Image 5 months ago

Parents should really be licensed and have to pass a test. Whether just clueless or abusive.

20points

Gavin Johnson 5 months ago

19points

Auntriarch 5 months ago

Its the best isn't it?❤️

3points

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Diego 5 months ago

13points

Roman Hans 5 months ago (edited)

7points

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Tamra 5 months ago

The best revenge is a life well-lived. Well done, you!

4points

Sobri Kate 5 months ago

Hell is on earth. Your parents were also in their own private hell and they spread the suffering to you. You ended the cycle of generational trauma.

2points

Rai Serl 5 months ago

10points

Zoe's Mom 5 months ago

May go to H3ll for this, but counting down the days until my mother passes.

7points

Tamra 5 months ago

3points

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Laserleader 5 months ago (edited)

2points

Littlemiss 5 months ago

Yep me too. You aren't alone there.

1point

Kristal 5 months ago

Why would you go to a bad place for that?

1point

Kristal 5 months ago

It wasn't until I was in my 30s that I realized it was NOT normal to freak out over water being spilled on the carpet. I thought I was weird for feeling it wasn't a big deal.

6points

Momifer 5 months ago

Not tearing wrapping paper so it can be reused.

6points

Bec 5 months ago

3points

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Auntriarch 5 months ago

We do that if it's really cute or expensive paper

1point

Diolla 5 months ago

I used to know many ppl who do this.

1point

Julie Chamberlin 5 months ago

5points

day light 5 months ago (edited)

1point

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Brian Beck 5 months ago

5points

Brenda 5 months ago

5points

Laserleader 5 months ago

4points

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Kris 5 months ago

4points

Guess Undheit 5 months ago

I could write a textbook on abusive and abnormal behaviour. Of the negative ones listed, I experienced half.

4points

bbfa 5 months ago

3points

Joy 5 months ago

3points

Littlemiss 5 months ago

2points

Justbecause 5 months ago

That adults can't read your mind and the there are no consequences for thinking bad thoughts about people.

2points

NoName 5 months ago (edited)

1point

NoName 5 months ago

1point

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Jane Shead 5 months ago

I remember being new in this country in elementary school and bringing quiche and a thermos of consomme for lunch. So much wanted a pbj on white bread!

1point

ZombieMommy 4 months ago

0points

Nykky 5 months ago (edited)

0points

vodoyox 5 months ago

-2points

Brian & Carol Roberts 5 months ago

SALES PITCH!!!

0points

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KaraEdwards 5 months ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

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