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“I Don’t Want To Let It Go”: Guy Won’t Change His Mind Over Child Support From Sister For Her Kid

“I Don’t Want To Let It Go”: Guy Won’t Change His Mind Over Child Support From Sister For Her Kid

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The way this world works is that often people who are literally destined to become great parents cannot become them for biological reasons. At the same time, there are people next to them who give birth to children without caring about them at all. And it’s good if there is a responsible relative nearby who can get themselves involved.

The story we are going to tell you today is exactly of this kind. Its author, the user u/Free-Net6456, sued his addict sister for custody of her daughter many years ago, and now the question of child support has arisen.

More info: Reddit

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The author of the post has a younger sister who is a longtime addict and once even got arrested for a felony

Image credits: Tim Mossholder / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

The man was the only relative who got involved in the life of the sister’s 10-year-old daughter

Image credits: Free-Net6456

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Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

So after some time of living with her, he understood how difficult her life with her mom was, and filed for custody

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Image credits: Free-Net6456

Image credits: KATRIN BOLOVTSOVA / Pexels (not the actual photo)

The mom didn’t give up, but the man won this process and then filed for child support as well

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Image credits: Free-Net6456

The relatives tried to coax him to cancel child support, but the man was adamant as he wanted this money for his niece’s future

So, the Original Poster (OP) is a 34-year-old man, whose sister, two years younger, is a longtime addict and at one time even got arrested for a felony. With all the ensuing consequences. But the main problem was not even this, but the fact that the sister had a 10-year-old daughter, and none of the relatives wanted to step up.

In short, our hero intervened, and the girl started to live with him. Over time, realizing how difficult her life with an abusive mom was, the uncle decided to formalize guardianship. The girl was not against it, but the mother resisted and initiated a legal fight. Which the author eventually won – albeit having spent a hefty amount of money on it.

And so, over time, the author found out that, according to the law, he had the right to demand child support from the hapless mom – and he really claimed it. Even despite understanding perfectly well that it was unlikely that his sister, even if she’d allegedly gotten rid of her addiction to substances, would be able to pay this money.

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The uncle remained adamant even in the face of numerous pleas and demands from relatives who claimed that his sister had reformed and gotten on the right path, and that it would be the right step on his part to cancel child support. However, after some time, the woman was caught committing illegal actions again – so the OP was once again convinced that he was right not to give in to the numerous persuasions.

Image credits: Karolina Kaboompics / Pexels (not the actual photo)

According to UNICEF data, in 2023 there were nearly 12.9 million custodial parents in the United States, which is almost 4% of the total population. At the same time, almost half (or more precisely, 49.4%) of all custodial parents had a court order, child support award, or other agreements over financial support from the noncustodial parent. So, as we can see, the author is far from alone here.

At the same time, situations where non-biological parents of a child act as guardians are also quite common, although not very frequent. “In some cases, custody may be awarded to a non-parent family member, such as a grandparent or other close relative, if it is deemed to be in the best interests of the child,” the Harr Law Firm official website states.

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“Statistics indicate that non-parental custody arrangements account for only about 4% of all custody cases. These arrangements often arise in situations where both parents are deemed unfit or unable to provide a stable and nurturing environment for the child.”

As for the commenters on the original post, they massively supported the author, claiming that he did nothing wrong here. “The money isn’t for you, it’s for your daughter. Don’t give up her entitlement to support, even if you save it for her education,” one of the responders wrote absolutely reasonably.

People in the comments also advised the original poster to invest this money in the future of his niece (an idea somewhat similar to this grandma‘s concept from our other story). “I’d just put everything in a trust fund for her to get when she’s off to uni to make her life more comfortable. Never EVER give up her claim to that money,” another person summarized. So what is your point of view on this situation?

Most of the commenters told the author to not give up and praised him for being a decent uncle really concerned about the girl’s well-being

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Oleg Tarasenko

Oleg Tarasenko

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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After many years of working as sports journalist and trivia game author and host in Ukraine I joined Bored Panda as a content creator. I do love writing stories and I sincerely believe - there's no dull plots at all. Like a great Italian composer Joaquino Rossini once told: "Give me a police protocol - and I'll make an opera out of it!"

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Oleg Tarasenko

Oleg Tarasenko

Writer, BoredPanda staff

After many years of working as sports journalist and trivia game author and host in Ukraine I joined Bored Panda as a content creator. I do love writing stories and I sincerely believe - there's no dull plots at all. Like a great Italian composer Joaquino Rossini once told: "Give me a police protocol - and I'll make an opera out of it!"

Monika Pašukonytė

Monika Pašukonytė

Author, BoredPanda staff

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I am a visual editor here. In my free time I enjoy the vibrant worlds of art galleries, exhibitions, and soulful concerts. Yet, amidst life's hustle and bustle, I find solace in nature's embrace, cherishing tranquil moments with beloved friends. Deep within, I hold a dream close - to embark on a global journey in an RV, accompanied by my faithful canine companion. Together, we'll wander through diverse cultures, weaving precious memories under the starry night sky, fulfilling the wanderlust that stirs my soul.

Read less »

Monika Pašukonytė

Monika Pašukonytė

Author, BoredPanda staff

I am a visual editor here. In my free time I enjoy the vibrant worlds of art galleries, exhibitions, and soulful concerts. Yet, amidst life's hustle and bustle, I find solace in nature's embrace, cherishing tranquil moments with beloved friends. Deep within, I hold a dream close - to embark on a global journey in an RV, accompanied by my faithful canine companion. Together, we'll wander through diverse cultures, weaving precious memories under the starry night sky, fulfilling the wanderlust that stirs my soul.

Do you think the OP should continue to demand child support from his sister?
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renskedejonge9 avatar
Flip
Community Member
17 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's mad at her only, but I think it's insane that he had to pay so much to save this kid. There's something wrong with that system and the judges and lawyers who make fortunes on this.

libstak avatar
Libstak
Community Member
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He is wrong about adoption, heck you can adopt an adult if you want, it's a legal process agreed between 2 parties, the adoptee and the adopter. I think the niece would be happy about it.

karenlk718 avatar
Pencil McGovern
Community Member
5 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think OOP is saying that the mother wouldn't agree to the adoption so it wouldn't be worth battling over at this stage. But, as you said, you can legally adopt an adult and I hope he does. I'm sure his niece would be thrilled to become his daughter and once she turns 18, the mother's approval won't be needed.

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ram31280 avatar
RAM31280
Community Member
14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA. The money isn't for OP, it is for the daughter and since OP says he doesn't necessarily need the child support, I hope he is putting all of it into an account for his niece to use in the future for a college fund or downpayment on a home

mikefitzpatrick avatar
Mike F
Community Member
6 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Right? Even if he doesn't necessarily need that money atm, it would be a good chunk of change toward her education.

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renskedejonge9 avatar
Flip
Community Member
17 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's mad at her only, but I think it's insane that he had to pay so much to save this kid. There's something wrong with that system and the judges and lawyers who make fortunes on this.

libstak avatar
Libstak
Community Member
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He is wrong about adoption, heck you can adopt an adult if you want, it's a legal process agreed between 2 parties, the adoptee and the adopter. I think the niece would be happy about it.

karenlk718 avatar
Pencil McGovern
Community Member
5 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think OOP is saying that the mother wouldn't agree to the adoption so it wouldn't be worth battling over at this stage. But, as you said, you can legally adopt an adult and I hope he does. I'm sure his niece would be thrilled to become his daughter and once she turns 18, the mother's approval won't be needed.

Load More Replies...
ram31280 avatar
RAM31280
Community Member
14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA. The money isn't for OP, it is for the daughter and since OP says he doesn't necessarily need the child support, I hope he is putting all of it into an account for his niece to use in the future for a college fund or downpayment on a home

mikefitzpatrick avatar
Mike F
Community Member
6 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Right? Even if he doesn't necessarily need that money atm, it would be a good chunk of change toward her education.

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