We had been having trouble conceiving. 2 miscarriages within a year. He’s convinced it’s something wrong with me and schedules me a well woman exam. I say fine, knowing it’s most likely due to my age and they won’t be able to do anything about that but go to the appointment anyway. They say if the labs come back abnormal they’ll call me. About 4-5 days later while at the store, he gets picked up for a warrant. I go back home and about 15 mins later the doctors office calls. Tells me I have an STI. No. That can’t be right. I’m married! I’ve only been with my husband. Silence on the other end ….can I tell you I was counting down the minutes for that free 5 min call from jail….

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Trillian

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so the cheating is the problem? Or the outstanding warrant? Or both? I'm confused.

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My bf and flatmate went out for drinks while I stayed home with a flu. I fell asleep on the sofa watching TV and woke up to noises upstairs. It sounded like moaning and kissing. My heart sank and I felt like throwing up as I silently crept to my bedroom to peer in.

My flatmate was on top of my bf half naked. She saw me and leapt off and ran out to her bedroom & shut the door. I yelled and banged on it and she ignored me. I went to him to yell & get an explanation & he pretended he was asleep. Completely ignoring me. And denying it the next day.

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ElfVibratorGlitter

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In your bedroom?! How stupid/gross/rude are they?

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I smelt the pu**sy on her breath and confronted her.. she broke down and admitted to f*****g around with her lesbian coworker. She was pregnant at the time. Wasn't mine. When I met her she was 2 months pregnant. After the break up I found out she was married to another guy the whole time and had bailed out on him while he was at work and moved in with me. Yes.. we dated a few months prior. Lived about 2 hours away. Got tired of the drive that's why we rushed a bit.. or at least that's why I did. Turns out she was just a nympho for anything that would touch her.

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Hseed

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Every sentence it gets weirder ...

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She'd been having sleepovers at her best galpal's. I was feeling weird about it. I snooped. She'd just sent nude photos to MY friend of her and the girl together.


I'd been feeling weird for a bit. On some level I knew.

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MommyofB

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Terrible! She's a coward..

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First, I was awoken in the middle of the night with my ex calling me to pick him up. I had fallen asleep with him next to me hours earlier. He was pulled over by the police and they impounded the car. His story was that he got up in the middle of the night to drive to the beach to watch the sunrise. Sure, Jan.

Then he came home a few times from work (a white collar job), 2-3 hours late, and went directly to shower. I dropped by his work to ask him something and he kept running away from me, wouldn't speak to me or even acknowledge my existence. I had to pick up his paycheck another time and told the receptionist why I was there, because he was in a meeting. She proclaimed that I couldn't be his wife because she knew for a fact that he was not married.

I confronted him and told him I knew he was cheating, and he told me I was "mentally unstable" and was going to have me "involuntarily committed to a mental hospital".

I put a keystroke tracker on his computer. I found the secret email account and the girlfriend. I knew her name, where she worked, and that he had been on dating sites for years. I changed the locks and left a note on the front door. We had been married for 20 years.

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MushroomHead22

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bro if it ain't working just call it quits. why go through all this hassle? this seems so tiering and not worth it at all... like who has this type of energy?

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Her affair partners daughter called me. He was 25 years older than her so it was an adult daughter, his wife found out and had her daughter call me since she had babysat my kids before.

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LB

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OP has partner (f) A, who is cheating on OP with AP (m), who is the father of their babysitter. APs wife finds out, makes babysitter call OP. Had to rewrite because that's a lot to unpack in two sentences.

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Every year, she would go to her country to stay with family during Christmas and New Years. I would stay behind as someone had to work and pay the bills and since we were together 24/7 living and working together, I thought it'd be a good thing for her to have some time to herself with her family.

This particular time, before she left, she was anxiously awaiting a package in the mail. They were supposedly pictures that she had made into an album that she wanted to bring with her. Days passed and the package never came. On the day that she left, I emailed her letting her know that the package came in. She told me to give it to her friend and that she would get it from her once she made it back. That set off an alarm in my head because if the package is safe at home with your husband, why would I give it to her friend? Why not just get it when you get back home, you know? A weird feeling came over me days later and I felt like I HAD to open it. Like something was telling me to do it. So I did. And what I found were pictures of her making out with some guy, pictures of her with this guy and her family as if they were a couple, pictures of her with his family and friends...I crumpled up the pictures in my balled fist and rage came over me. I couldn't sleep for 3 days straight.

Long story short, as much as I didn't want to, I ended up divorcing her. It took me a long time to recover from that as she was my one and only (so far 🤞). I've been single and haven't had a kiss or had sex in close to 10 years lol. Just can't seem to find the right one 😮‍💨.

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dandylilah

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damn, bro. 10 yrs?

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Not me but a friend: his wife and her side piece both left reviews on the same Airbnb for the same night.

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LB

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You'd think people would be more careful.

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She was treating me horrible for weeks. I got suspicious so went through her phone. Found her Snapchat library of all the pics she took of herself to send off, and messages from a guy referring to those pics. I got the usual "how dare you go through my phone" b******t. It really sucks having to tell the kids that Mommy doesn't live here anymore....

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Brenda

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Why don't people just leave if they want to be with someone else?

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Found out she was pregnant.

A few weeks later we're cuddling on the couch, and I get a call from my sister on the opposite side of the country. She informs me that some random woman on Facebook messaged her claiming her husband and my wife were having an affair. I didn't believe it, but it was all true. I was military, and she was meeting up with married grunts in hotel rooms.

Literally two weeks after we learn we're expecting a child, not even a year into the marriage, I find this out.

Edit: this was in 2014. At the time, if someone you weren't friends with sent you a message on Facebook, the message went to a different folder that could only be accessed through Facebook on a web browser. It did not show in the app. The lady that messaged my sister had messaged me months prior, but I never saw any of the messages because I only used the Facebook app.

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MommyofB

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4 months ago

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I'm sorry you experoenced this. You certainly deserve better!

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She got home around 5-6 am after a company "dinner". Slept on the couch even tho i insisted we go to bed. Around 10 I asked her how It went but she just said It was good and continued sleeping. I told her we could speak when she felt better (More awake).
Turns out she slept with her boss. We separated about 2 months after that and they had a son together.

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MommyofB

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OMG! She's an awful person!

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She handed me her phone and asked me to proof read an email she was going to send to her director that morning and in comes a text from some dude I've never heard of.

They had hooked up the week before while I was on a work trip.

They'd been sexting for weeks. They met while she was out with girls.

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MommyofB

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I'm sorry! Rather than be honest, she made an awful situation, worse!

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I came home 3 days early from a work tour and caught her in the act.

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Rahb in Oz

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By helicopter?

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I became suspicious when her attitude suddenly changed to scorn and she started blaming me for anything that happened. She started getting drunk, and she'd never done that before. She started buying new underwear and "going to work" for extra shifts. The people at her workplace started treating me different and being stand offish. Then my 8 year old son was telling me about her conversations with him and the new dad. That was the last straw.

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ElfVibratorGlitter

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Oooo .."new dad" is harsh

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Well she was visibly showing pregnant after moving out about 45 days earlier.  We hadn't slept together in a year.  To be fair, we were in the death throes of our marriage but she couldn't even wait to move out of my house. 

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LB

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IDK if divorce proceedings have started I don't think it's cheating, but yeah in a lot of cases not the smartest thing either. I think it's good to heal before trying again, for most folks.

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We had our Google photos synched (his idea!) so we could more easily share pics and see what the other person took pics of.

He was away for the weekend while I was laid up in bed with either a very sprained or broken ankle, so I wasn't able to join him like originally planned.

I was going through our shared photos trying to find a particular funny meme, and there were pictures taken that night of him and another girl all cuddled up. 😑.

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Elchinero

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I'm smaht. Not like everybody sez ....

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Found a message on his phone from a mutual friend of ours that read, "I can't stop thinking about all the things I want to do to you when I see you again". We'd been together for 6 years and I was 4 months pregnant at the time.

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HangryHangryHippo

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Douche canoe!

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Told him I was going out with a few of my coworkers after work. Ended up drinking a bit too much, so I texted him that I'd be home later once I sobered up. Made it home around midnight and the first thing I noticed was a pair of car keys I never saw before. I immediately went on the hunt. I tried opening the bedroom door, but it was locked. After a few choice words, he eventually shuffled out by squeezing himself out of the bedroom through a cracked open bedroom door in just his boxers. He told me it wasn't what it looked like and begged me to let her out of the house without any drama. I told him to get her tf out of our house. As she tried running out, I caught a glimpse of her. It was his supervisor from work. After she left, I immediately began grilling him about how they wound up in the bedroom. He had invited her over to play his new video game I had bought him, but she started to get a headache. He didn't feel it was appropriate for his guest to lay on our "hard" couch, so he let her lay in our bed. Mind you, we had a guest room. Alright. So now we know how she got into the bedroom, how'd she get naked and how is this not cheating? This moron said "well, she wasn't comfortable in her clothes. So, she needed to be naked to sleep. But it's not cheating because she slept UNDER the covers and I slept ON the covers while still wearing my boxers." Safe to say I divorced him, reported them to their superiors, and left their dumb a**es. Last I heard from my old neighbors, they got married. He cheated on her, she cheated on him, and they fight in the front yard.

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LB

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I don't know about the once a cheater always a cheater adage, but yeah I wouldn't date someone who was cheating on their partner with me

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Was shopping in a supermarket after work, heard her voice and thought oooh I’ll say hello, looked down the aisle and saw her with her ex and heard them saying about what they was cooking for dinner tonight.

I got home and phoned her and she said “I can’t go out tonight I’m sick” so I tried to push it and say oh no your sick I’ll came and cook dinner for you then, turned into a huge argument about me not respecting her space.

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My husband and I were sharing an iPhone charger one time while out and about with some friends. My phone battery was running low so I went to the car to plug it in and when I unplugged his phone to plug mine in, low and behold when the screen lit up, I see an “I love you so much. Can’t wait to see you later.” Turns out he’d been screwing our neighbor for a few months. He’d wait until I fell asleep and then sneak over to her parent’s house. That’s right she was 30 and still living with her parents. We divorced and he went on to cheat on her at least three times and even went as far as marrying one of them for a year before divorcing this affair partner and going back to the original AP. Both are stupid as hell because everyone knows he will cheat again.

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Rafael

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What's AP? "Another Person"? This is getting silly!

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He totaled my car while dropping her off after a date.

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ElfVibratorGlitter

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😲

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My bf and I each had our own laptops but he used his for creating music in a home studio he made. So since it was always hooked up to an elaborate situation, he often used my computer to check his stuff. Well one day he got careless and didn't log out of Facebook properly.

I got on my computer and saw that I had a dm notification. Clicked on it and saw that I didn't know this person but there was a conversation. It was then I realized that I'm on my bf account not mine. And that message, while not spicy, was revealing. It was an old high school lady friend. She asked if he was in a relationship and he answered that he was single and has been for a while. A surprise to me as a live in gf of 3 years.

I don't know. There was just something in me that ignited. I went ham and started searching everywhere to see if this was a one time lie or if there was something more bubbling beneath the surface.

Well...I was able to contact the cell phone company and printed out phone records. He called a specific number over 1000 times within the record timeframe I pulled, which was maybe like 3 months. It wasn't his family or his best friend. I had their numbers. I did some more sleuthing and found an old phone of his and charged it and searched for this number. It was his ex gf.

I took a highlighter and marked every single instance and then took the stack of papers to confront him. I asked if he was in contact with his ex and of course he denied it. So I threw the proof at him and said how crazy it was that his phone just called her 1000 times in the past three months.

This paired with his drastic drop in libido (which I was giving grace about because he said he was stressed about his s****y job) and I realized it's over.

Spoiler alert. They were together very shortly after I moved out. But I suspect he cheats on her too because the ex gf and the Facebook lady friend were two different people.

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Ephemera Image

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I would definitely have informed them both, lol. But I'm a scorched earth kind of person, lol.

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I went to the mailbox to retrieve the mail and found a statement from a bank we didn't use with her name and another man's name on it. That's when I knew we were done.

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Brenda

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Dumba$$ used her home address!?! Yeah, you're lucky

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Checked Grindr. There he was trying to hook up with anyone in a 5 mile radius. He got mad that I caught him and acted like it was an invasion of privacy lmao.

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Rahb in Oz

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Should have agreed beforehand that this was OK!

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I went to her house and asked her grandma to let me use her computer. I found a letter to someone else telling him she loved him and even complaining about me. It was really hard in that moment. Now i see it as a blessing in disguise.

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MommyofB

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What a oowardly selfish b***h! You deserve better. Good luck!

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Smell. They had a different odor on them (like
Men’s cologne) and then they fessed up.

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Brenda

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I swear these people WANT to get caught

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Day out with my son , and he says " i cant find my ipad" . Boom hit up the IOS find my app and bam . Why is my sons ipad at a hotel. Lets just say that ipad was lost for a while. I tracked and collected evidence.

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Caroline Nagel

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Que?

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Not my spouse, but my SO. It was purely accidental. My sister was home visiting so I was at my parents’ watching a movie and it was late so I initially said I was probably going to crash there since he was out anyways with “friends”. After the movie ended I actually decided not to stay at my parents’.

It was a shared parking lot for two multi-family homes. When I pulled in, I hadn’t seen his car. However, the kitchen light came on. Stupidly my first thought was “Oh my God!! We’re being robbed!!” But instead of doing the logical thing you do if you think someone has broken in and calling the police, I went in. By the door were women’s shoes that didn’t belong to me and then I heard a woman’s voice. It felt so surreal. I kept walking further into the house and to the bedroom. I found him on the bed and a woman coming out of the bathroom in her bra. I was speechless. I turned around and started to walk out and the woman followed me and asked how I got in and who I was! When I said “Um I got in with my key because I’m his girlfriend who lives here” she said “Are you sure?”

I got in my car and drove back to my parents’ and woke the whole house up hysterically crying.

The guy tried to play it off like he was so drunk he didn’t know what was happening. As if anyone could fall for that excuse. She had been calling him “babe” so it seemed deeper than that anyway.

The worst part was the woman wouldn’t let it go after. She got my number somehow. She sent me all the messages between her and my boyfriend even though I asked her to please just leave me alone. She watched my social media stories for months afterwards, until I finally made it all private. I felt bad for her at first because obviously she was hurt too, but it was just too much for me. I told her that night she was more than welcome to the man.

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FoxEcoLimaIndiaCharlieIndiAlfa

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She was welcome to what man? There's no man in this story, whatsoever.

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She and I worked at the same place. I was working over night and she was working days. It was my birthday and she was to work 12 hours Saturday and Sunday, 4am-4pm. My team had just released new code and had to do a lot of bug fixes and I was stuck working 4pm-4am. My teams bullpen was just inside the door so I always looked to see if I could see my wife leaving. I didn’t see her leave and she didn’t stop in to wish me a happy birthday.

About an hour into our shift my manager noticed I was there and my section of code had no more bugs and I was helping other people, he offered me the chance to go home for the weekend. I jumped at it and left.

I pulled into my drive way around 6:00pm and my house was empty. I figured my wife had to run to the store or maybe went to grab dinner.

When she and I worked opposite shifts like this I would always call her on my first and last break, so around seven when she still wasn’t home I called her. When she answered I just asked her how her day was and what she was up to, she said she was just sitting on the couch with the dog. I was literally on the couch with the dog so I decided to see what she had to say. She said she had a good day but was really tiered and just going to go to bed. I never told her I was home but instead let her think I was still at work. When we got off the phone I called a friend who works in her department and found she had been switching her work station to work with the same guy for about 3 months, (we had only been married about 5 months at this point) that she hadn’t been at work that day and wasn’t going to be at work the next day.

I used some unethical means to find his address, I called a friend and we went over to his house, we saw her car parked in his drive way and decided to just bring the car home with us. (I gave it to her as a wedding gift) we brought it home filled it with her cloths. The next day she called me crying saying someone stole the car, I tried to get her to file a police report but she wouldn’t so I finally just told her the car was in my drive way and she could come get it when she was done with her new boyfriend, and I already packed for her.

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MommyofB

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Good for you! Sad that you had to deal with such a horribly selfish woman!

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I went through my husband's phone because I wanted to prove to myself that there was nothing to be paranoid about... it was the opposite. I'll never be able to forget all the pictures and conversations.

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THE COOL ZACH

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That’s sad to hear about😔

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She insisted she drop me off for work so she could hang out with a old friend I never heard of (weird but OK). I got let off early so I called her for a ride, no answer red flag #1. Called her mom to get said friends info, her mom said she had a falling out with that friends and hated her now. That was red flag #2. Her mom tried calling her but it kept going straight to voice mail. So her mom came to give me a ride home (and got herself all worked up abut what ditch we'd find my wife in) she decided to wait there till I was scheduled off to see if she came for me. She did and upon seeing her parents and me standing together she came clean.

Edit: Forgot to mention since it was the 90's we had a plate on the front of my truck that had our names on it. It was off when she came and made a stupid excuse as to why it was off.

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Brenda

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Like vanity plates?

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Making efforts to look fabulous for supposedly mundane things, school run, or market trip, or coffee with the girls (coincided with uptick in let's call it body maintenance and refusal for my company on said errands). So I think a part of you will know if something atypical is occurring in your couple's routine.

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I was in the hospital at the time. He had forgotten to turn off his location. I saw on the Find My app that he was at her house. Apparently that was the third time. Divorce pending.

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Brenda

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So sorry

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I knew for months but had no proof. She came into the bar I worked at and got wasted. Went through her phone while she was indisposed and found pictures and messages with the guy. She had him saved under the name of a friend.

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MommyofB

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I'm sorry. You deserve better!

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That STD I got did come from somewhere. And it was certainly not from me f*****g around. And he didn't even defend himself when I confronted him. He was basically like "'I've been to Greece for 5 weeks. What do you expect me to do?". My only comment to that was asking him what he thinks "monogamous" means.

And the second one caught himself cheating. He canceled our date night because he needed to work late. So I went to the restaurant we had a table at anyways, and asked a friend of mine if he wanted to join. We didn't even sit down before my ex entered the room with his tongue buried deep inside the mouth of his "co-worker".

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FoxEcoLimaIndiaCharlieIndiAlfa

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Well obviously the STD came from somewhere/someone...if you aren't sleeping with anyone else and was tested before sleeping with your current partner, without protection, and all came back negative, you probably have a good idea where it came from. Now it is possible, with certain STDs, that the infection can lay dormant, no signs or symptoms and be undetectable during testing. So for those that aren't cheating, on their partner, but end up with an STD, shouldn't rely on just this information alone to determine if they're cheating. It is possible that either one of you could have been infected, prior to being with each other, and just not known. My advice would be, to get more evidence, to be 100% sure that you are being cheated on, before filing for divorce or ending the relationship.

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We’ve always had trust issues and it was a toxic relationship so we always went thru each others phones, texts, etc. I worked overnight one day I went through her phone and saw texts of her saying “he’s sleeping right now I’m coming” and more other texts like that so basically she was taking my car while I slept through the day until the next shift to go see other dude… I saw nudes and other stuff she sent as well.

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