Join the Fun!

Cat sleeping on man chest "They must sit as close to my face as possible, preferably on my face. My inability to breathe is my problem."

TeikaDunmora , FatCat45 Report

448points

POST

Dena Goodwin 1 year ago

I have an old boy that showed up at our house and adopted us. He’s indoor/outdoor and refuses to stay indoors all the time. When he’s in, if I’m asleep, he insists on trying to sleep on my face. I can’t breathe so we have a wresting match until he finally decides he’s not going to win and moves to lay down by the side of my head.

7points

BakedKahuna 1 year ago

Breathing is totally overrated. Who needs to breathe if one can have a cat in the face instead 😻

4points

AngelWingsYT 1 year ago

My cat used to sleep across my neck when he was a baby boy. He is now 7 and 12lbs and still occasionally thinks he can do this. He can not.

3points

LapCat 1 year ago

My Smudge kitty would do this. As soon as I sit or lay on the couch, she would jump up and sit on my chest with her face in mine. No concept of personal space. I miss her :(

2points

Nikki138 1 year ago

I miss my Meatloaf, Ham, Piggy, Chicken Legs... aka Squeaky also 😞

1point

Mary Fast 1 year ago

If a cat does this you are blessed.they don't just love anyone

2points

SK Bruning 1 year ago

Problem~ what problem? If you want to breathe, where there is a will there is a way! 😮‍💨😅😂

2points

Anviti Pahal 1 year ago

The fact that your cat feels so close to you 🥰

1point

Kat Pekin 1 year ago

Mine does this! It's almost like she wants to get down my throat to be as close as she can.

1point

Tracey Kneasel 1 year ago

I have one like that and it's always at the worst possible time.

1point

tabithapaquette98 1 year ago

Yeah. My cat Xena is on my chest/ front of mouth right now. Luckily I've got my nose!

0points

Joanne Hudson 1 year ago

Well, he isn't concerned about that; why should you be.

0points

November Lowry 1 year ago

"If you can't figure out how to breathe, mere human, perhaps you might consider departing this life."

0points

Gitta Landgraf 1 year ago

You're lucky! My cat sleeps on my HEAD! I'm not allowed to move!

0points

Chloe Ross 1 year ago

My girl Olive is the same way.

0points

Carolyn Legg 1 year ago

Cats like to feel your cartotid arterey, like their mom's heartbeat.

0points

Teresa Spanics 1 year ago

AWW 😻💖

0points

Riley Quinn 1 year ago

My cat used to lay on my face while I was sleeping. Come to find out, I have sleep apnea and that was his way of waking me up, which caused me to turn and breathe.

0points

Sheila Cobb 1 year ago

My cat does the same thing lol!!

0points

Sara Wilson 1 year ago

I have one of those too. And get a face, mouth, nose and eyeballs full of cat hair as gratitude

0points

meow point1 1 year ago

Our cat El Dorado does that!

0points

Mojavedog 1 year ago

Oh, that sweet smile the cat has. So heartwarming

0points

Edda Kamphues 1 year ago

Must sleep on my boobs when I have a daytime nap.

0points

Audrey Lu 1 year ago

it's like: i must hug u hooman

0points

Steve Robert 1 year ago

Buddies for life!

0points

Batwench Premium 1 year ago

Maru must have NO ONE nearer to his mummy than him. However, a number of my cats also think that they must be the nearest to me at the same time. So I know this OP’s situation.

0points

Rosie Red 1 year ago

I must wake up in the morning when she does, otherwise the meow-screaming begins. I must clean the litter right after she uses it, otherwise the meow-screaming begins. I must give her a smidge of ice-cream when I'm having some, otherwise the meow-screaming begins. I MUST leave the bathroom door open, otherwise the meow-screaming begins.

0points

Huddo's sister 1 year ago

My old cat did this!

0points

Gary Silcox 1 year ago

Love you dad

0points

Manic Mama 1 year ago

This is the correct power dynamic between humans and our feline overlords.

0points

A black cat sitting on a bathroom counter "Leave the door open, you don't need privacy in the toilet."

BloodAngel85 replied:
"I have 3 cats and a dog, I don't even bother closing the door anymore."

Persiandude73 , Madalyn Cox Report

399points

POST

CAT /ᐠ｡ꞈ｡ᐟ QUEEN 1 year ago

we need to see you to make sure you don't pull a elvis...consider it a favor :3

81points

Honkey_Cat , EKATERINA BOLOVTSOVA Report

White cat on white bed "Bed making will always include at least one cat jumping on the bed to 'help'.

372points

POST

Francine Govan 1 year ago

Well DUH ... bed making is not a chore, hooman ... it's a game that must be played!

88points

Cat's paws "If there is a face-sized hole in the center of the food bowl, the bowl is effectively empty."

dartmanx , Marco Giuseppe Report

347points

POST

Zoey Rayne 1 year ago

Buy a wider, shallower bowl or a plate and read about whisker fatigue.

132points

Black cat sitting in blue litter box "If you do anything to my poop box, I must immediately rechristen it."

Taddare , Laura LaRose Report

335points

POST

CAT /ᐠ｡ꞈ｡ᐟ QUEEN 1 year ago

only the peasents of my kingdom use poop boxes, us higher class cats use whats called "plants in a vase" mush more proper.

70points

White and black cat lying on white textile "After sleeping, changing the sleep position will not be tolerated."

meech7607 replied:
"My cat used to sleep in the valley that's made by the blanket between your legs. One night I was in that twilight almost asleep phase and he was sleeping down there, and I didn't realize it. I rolled over and catapulted him off of the bed."

root_su , Ben Wicks Report

327points

POST

Zoey Rayne 1 year ago

Sister's cat: "Nighttime cuddles are a must." *curls up against side of my sister's leg* Sis: "It's a hot summer night. Leave a few inches." *Scoots over* Cat: *Follows and presses against leg* Sis: *Scoots over* Cat: *Follows and presses against leg* Sis: *reaches edge of bed, goes to other side* Cat: *repeats process*

132points

Gray cat looking straight "You can touch but don't touch."

victoria-n , River Fx Report

314points

POST

Karen Krause 1 year ago

One of my cats constantly shows his tummy when I'm petting him, but it's a trap. You can touch me, nope, no touch!

100points

Cat standing near opened-door "I must be in every room you are. I will claw at the door and carpet if I am not allowed in.

Do not follow me around. I want my space."

DOTHETHING_ replied:
"Cat must have the option of being in any room you are in. Will check stuff out then leave immediately. If you close the door then the cycle repeats."

thecalmninja , Marjan Grabowski Report

291points

POST

OleMacharia 1 year ago

Personal bodyguard checking if everything is alright with you

61points

#10

Cat sitting on sheets "Clean laundry will be considered as a bed."

root_su Report

289points

POST

Esmeralda Esmeralda 1 year ago

I love the fabrics!

42points

#11

Cats Sitting near Building Wall and Door "Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out."

BillohRly asked:
"Have you tried letting her out? And then let her in? And then letting her out and then letting her..."

sparrow5 , Aysegul Alp Report

278points

POST

Linda C 1 year ago

Your cat is worried about your health, sitting is the new smoking. So they're getting you to move

67points

ZigguratofDoom , cottonbro studio Report

#12

White Cat on Brown Wooden Floor "Are you beginning to fall asleep? Then I must run wide open from one end of the house to the other at least four times. The galloping sound will help you sleep."

277points

POST

Powerful Katrinka 1 year ago

I actually find the sound of my cats having their 3:00 am rodeo quite soothing. It means that all's right with the world.

158points

#13

Cat drinking faucet water in the bathroom "Going to the bathroom? Need to drink from the faucet. Walk past the bathroom? Need faucet water. Make eye contact? Need faucet water."

KAL3434 Report

255points

POST

YTK 1 year ago

“Gary, that’s called an addiction.”

111points

#14

Cat lying on bed beside women "No placing of hands or feet outside of blankets."

soitsmydayoff replied:
"To add onto this, no sudden movements underneath the blanket, or else it's fair game."

D_B_R , Adam Kuylenstierna Report

248points

POST

LuLuBelle 1 year ago

I trained my cats when they were tiny kittens that attacking feet or hands in bed was strictly forbidden, and made a point of never ever using my hands or feet as toys for them to play with so they wouldn't be confused.As a result I have 7 cats who do not attack my feet at night. It's not hard to train your cats, and it's important not to tolerate or encourage "cute" behavior in kittens that will be a problem when they're adults.

10points

LiterallyOuttoLunch , Tran Mau Tri Tam ✪ Report

#15

Cat and dog in living room "Cats get the spot on the bed that they want, dogs may have the leftovers."

231points

POST

Chia 1 year ago

My Newfoundland used to lie on the couch and my kitty would curl up right on top of her. They would nap like that.

98points

#16

Furry Cat lying on the Floor "You may attempt to knit/sew, but I will be attacking the wool every five seconds. Extreme knitting."

scribblefrog , Inge Wallumrød Report

223points

POST

ValdaDeDieu 1 year ago

The Knit Olympics Kittiad!

46points

#17

White Cat Licking a Crystal Glass "Any uncovered food will be licked."

scribblefrog , cottonbro studio Report

222points

POST

Nay Wilson 1 year ago

My kittens very quickly learn that I’m blind in my right eye and will trick me into turning my head away from my plate by staring hard at something. When I turn to see what’s got their attention they snatch some food off the plate and run out the room to eat it

129points

#18

Cat sitting near TV "I am more important than Game of Thrones. To illustrate this point, I will frequently stand on the coffee table, directly in your line of sight to the television."

spunkychickpea , halesiii Report

216points

POST

Adam Belaire 1 year ago

Chris Pratt was in GoT?

69points

#19

Black cat and dog lying on bed "The 40kg dog must at all times display submissive behavior towards the cat unless he wishes nails in her b*tt."

NeedsMoreBlood , GoGoSqueezers Report

214points

POST

Nosirrow 1 year ago

My cat joined us when we had three dogs. Once they stopped wanting to hunt her down, they sort of accepted kitty. She wanted to be the boss and failed. With a new dog, she was more patient bc he was young.

40points

#20

Cat peeping near edge of table "I want food right now but I will eat later."

BloodAngel85 replied:
"For my male cat, it's 'I want food now, but I'll only eat a small amount and come back expecting to be there 5 minutes later.' Unfortunately, his 2 sisters are pigs when it comes to food, so he just meows at me for more."

victoria-n , Janayara Machado Report

190points

POST

Hugh Cookson 1 year ago (edited)

Yup, 5am start for me, so put food down at 4.30 before heading off with 2 cats eagerly waiting and yowing. Get back at 3 to find less than a quarter eaten but expecting fresh .... spoiled little sods !! Love them both to pieces, 20 year old brother and sister, slowing down a bit but still active, long may that continue.

80points

#21

Cat sitting on Christmas tree branch "Christmas is for us.

Christmas trees are exclusively for us."

MisterShine Report

190points

POST

Shark Lady 1 year ago

I don't bother with a tree anymore, my older cat destroyed the last one!

45points

#22

Orange cat drinking milk from white bowl "If you do not maintain visual contact with cheese products at all times you agree to forfeit your right to finish eating said cheese products."

purpleRN , Mónika Erdei Report

187points

POST

Nosirrow 1 year ago

My cat lived dairy except for white cheese, or quark. So I thought cheesecake was safe. No! Cats clearly didn't get the memo about lactose intolerance.

53points

#23

Woman lying beside brown cat "Once your alarm goes off, it's cuddle time. Oh, you want to go back to sleep? Then you'll have to do so with 11 lbs of Bogart on your chest."

TheWizard01 , Oleg Ivanov Report

182points

POST

ValdaDeDieu 1 year ago

That's what the army calls a BOGEY.

27points

#24

Cat lying on woman knees "If your lap is empty, it is fair game."

scribblefrog , Sam Lion Report

182points

POST

Zoey Rayne 1 year ago

"If laptop is on lap it is still fair game."

91points

#25

"My face is itchy. Please scratch it without touching me."

friday6700 Report

172points

POST

ValdaDeDieu 1 year ago

And don't stop till I tell you to. Or there will be conssssssequences.

47points

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

See Also on Bored Panda

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

#26

Cat in the fridge "The fridge is a paradise. Don't quite know why they like it in there either."

livingblissfully , jackpumpkim Report

167points

POST

HelmGrass 1 year ago

...cause ppl put food in it.. DUH!

32points

#27

Cat walking on archit "All showers must be supervised from in between the shower curtains. No exceptions. Sometimes even on top."

VenomC Report

166points

POST

Zoey Rayne 1 year ago

I'm glad my little cat just "loafs" and waits on the bathmat while I shower.

49points

#28

Cat stretching "If they meow in the middle of the night, I must respond immediately (or else be hit in the face with their sharp claws)."

TeikaDunmora , Magda Ehlers Report

164points

POST

Hugh Cookson 1 year ago

Trust me, when you hear then sound of a cat in the early stages of throwing up on your bed in the middle of the night, regardless of how tired, drunk or inept you are, you will be shoving him/her off the bed in a nanosecond, followed by covering the pile of sick or hairball with toilet paper until the morning ; in my case, leaving it for my lovely Wife to clear up (before you condemn me, if I did it, it would be joined by my own vomit ; I clear the stuff up from the other end....)

101points

#29

"You're awake? Feed me. I don't care if it's 2 am, feed me."

reddit.com Report

160points

POST

Jennifer Checki 1 year ago

Cat smacks person in the face repeatedly, then, when person wakes up, cat: “oh you’re awake, too! What a coincidence. Feed me.”

74points

#30

Orange Cat Playing with Laser Pointer " All rugs are mine."

pumpmar , cottonbro studio Report

160points

POST

HelmGrass 1 year ago

and all ppls

23points

#31

"The water needs to be perfectly full and clean at all times, it can't even be medium-full."

pumpmar Report

159points

POST

CT 1 year ago

But the cat will still go and drink the stale old rainwater outside

91points

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

See Also on Bored Panda

“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

#32

Cat in a paper bag "All food is subject to taste testing."

VenomC Report

155points

POST

Nay Wilson 1 year ago

I once left a loaf of brioche bread on my counter, still wrapped in the plastic bag. When I went to get some an hour later the cats had gnawed through the bag to the bready goodness inside and eaten half the loaf

39points

#33

"When you shut off all the lights to go to bed, that is ancient cat language for war. And therefore I will attack your legs as soon as the lights go off."

PegaKing Report

150points

POST

Christina Feigner 1 year ago

And then you will get kicked off the bed through the covers.

23points

WallyPlumstead , cottonbro studio Report

#34

Black cat playing with feather "The toys I played with yesterday must be replaced with brand new, different toys today."

149points

POST

Rodney McKay 1 year ago

So, cats are equivalent to four-year-old children.

48points

#35

White Cats Head Inside The blue Jar "Glass items go on the floor."

DeLaNope , cottonbro studio Report

149points

POST

Thegoodboi 1 year ago

The sound is nice

30points

LiterallyOuttoLunch Report

#36

"Dogs do not touch cat toys, but cats can have free reign over dog toys."

146points

POST

Dena Goodwin 1 year ago

What’s mine is mine and what’s yours is mine too!

52points

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

See Also on Bored Panda

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

#37

Cat sleeping near computer "Cat goes to the left of the laptop, blocking the vent."

DeLaNope , Batut15 Report

142points

POST

Thegoodboi 1 year ago

It's nice and warm. Don't care if it overheats :)

38points

#38

"The spring on the bottom of the door is your new alarm clock."

Taddare Report

141points

POST

Dena Goodwin 1 year ago

OMG YES!! Not only an alarm but also a general annoyance tool.

45points

#39

Cat laying on black curtain "We will climb up your curtains and ruin them."

sugarydoring , whittlestwit Report

141points

POST

ValdaDeDieu 1 year ago (edited)

All things vertical yield to the feline domesticus - sometimes with catastrophic results.

30points

#40

Cat licking her mouth "Any accessible bread products will be destroyed (not eaten, just shredded)."

BrutalHonestyBuffalo replied:
"My cats don't destroy bread - but for whatever reason, if we leave a bread product unattended - you can be sure there will be one giant bite taken out of it. Plastic/paper and all."

TeikaDunmora , Abeer Zaki Report

135points

POST

lonely miso 1 year ago

MMMMM PLASTIC AND PAPER

30points

LiterallyOuttoLunch , Krasimir Georgiev Report

#41

A Dog and Cat Fighting "Cats eat before dogs."

131points

POST

ValdaDeDieu 1 year ago

Dogs serve humans and so, clearly beneath cats - who believe humans were put on earth to serve them.

36points

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

See Also on Bored Panda

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

#42

Cat sitting on green wooden bench "The picnic bench in the garden is my territory. If you are eating lunch out there, you must first appease me with tidbits."

scribblefrog , ROMAN ODINTSOV Report

129points

POST

Steve Robert 1 year ago

But of course!

23points

#43

"Any food placed before you belongs to me. What I do with that bite of food is my business. I'll probably just sniff it for two seconds and leave it there. Your food sucks. It smells great, but it sucks."

spunkychickpea Report

128points

POST

Xenon 1 year ago

My cat loves Doritos nacho cheese flavor.

28points

#44

Cat standing on dinning "I will stay off the left side of the counter as long as you let me sit next to the microwave and stare at the food."

scribblefrog , Nick Karvounis Report

120points

POST

Nay Wilson 1 year ago

My cats like to sit on top of the microwave and hang over the door and watch as the food rotates

38points

#45

"I must have the last corner or your vegemite toast. It is mine. Not yours. I will swipe it from your hand."

reddit.com Report

119points

POST

Shark Lady 1 year ago

With mine it's cheese.

25points

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

See Also on Bored Panda

“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

#46

"I will hide behind the desk all day."

absurded Report

97points

POST

Nykky 1 year ago

My desk has a little cubby underneath the main part that the cats have a rotating fascination about. Don't know why.

16points

Hi! I'm the visual editor at Bored Panda, spicing up articles on Gardening, Home & Design. Guess what I daydream about? A future home with a huge garden, filled with all kinds of veggies and flowers. Sounds like the perfect match, doesn't it?

Justė is a copywriter here at Bored Panda, and though her studies at the Veterinary Academy seemingly have nothing to do with writing, the passion for animals and nature helps in creating the most interesting and engaging posts. She also works with Search Engine Optimization, so you could find Bored Panda's articles easier. Justė's not only an avid equestrian, but she's also a walking encyclopedia. Ask her anything!

I am a visual editor here. In my free time I enjoy the vibrant worlds of art galleries, exhibitions, and soulful concerts. Yet, amidst life's hustle and bustle, I find solace in nature's embrace, cherishing tranquil moments with beloved friends. Deep within, I hold a dream close - to embark on a global journey in an RV, accompanied by my faithful canine companion. Together, we'll wander through diverse cultures, weaving precious memories under the starry night sky, fulfilling the wanderlust that stirs my soul.

Darja is a Content Creator at Bored Panda. She studied at the University of Westminster, where she got her Bachelor's degree in Contemporary Media Practice. She loves photography, foreign music and re-watching Forrest Gump.

What do you think ?

POST

Ms.GB 1 year ago (edited)

I now have a Santa bowl that I leave out all year long because kitty insists on drinking from the "special bowl". It used to be for a floating candle when cat yeeted the candle and decided it was a water dish.

17points

Yu Pan 1 year ago

My cat's rule: "You must watch me eat. I don't care if you are in the kitchen, watching TV, sitting on the porcelain bowl, or dying with a knife in your chest. When I eat, you come look.”

8points

Nykky 1 year ago

Probably a safety thing. They really trust you to look out for them and don't feel comfortable eating without you

3points

YTK 1 year ago

“Any and all cheez-it’s one wishes to enjoy will have a tax payed directly to the king. Additionally, all mini-chip bags shall be investigated by the king.”

7points

Catman (He/Him) 1 year ago

If a cup has no lid, it's not our cup, it's the cats cup.

3points

Jude Laskowski 1 year ago

Years ago, I had a cat who loved my tea (with milk). I had to buy a cup with a lid.

0points

Dorothy Stovall 1 year ago

My Catgirl loves sweet ice tea, especially if I set it in the side of the tub while I soak.

0points

Cyndielouwhoo 1 year ago

Same here, except anything carbonated, even just water...he doesn't lik

0points

Deborah B 1 year ago

If the human fails to provide face pets on command, the cat may display the Fluffy Tummy. When the Fluffy Tummy is displayed, the human will pet the Fluffy Tummy, and then the cat may then demand further pets to the face.

3points

Cyndielouwhoo 1 year ago

It's a trap!

3points

GhostlySnail (she/her) 1 year ago

Aha. I have now uncovered my dogs secret. She is a cat! I always suspected. But seriously my dog does a ton of these things lol

3points

KimB 1 year ago

Oh you're going down the basement steps? And it's dark? Time for the panther race! Must run in front of Mommy when she can't see me because I'm all black : D

2points

Doodles1983 1 year ago

Willow. “I will approach you on the right, squeakily asking for pets. The left side? That just will not do.” Nox. “There must be NO creases in the duvet or I can’t lie down.” Ozzy. “I heard your drawer open. Treat time is any time that happens.” Sweep. “Um no, you may NOT touch me unless I have my security cat (Nox) with me. And even then it’s begrudging. I will bath immediately after because I do not wish to smell like you!”

2points

Omiyaru 1 year ago

cats get fed dinner at 7pm, they insist it's at 530, and will hover, one wi rub her face on the lamp that sits directly behind my head. she tries threatening me with the lamp, I will rest my hand, on hereither with my entire fist and not move it, no matter how many times she gets bangs her teeth against it, and then she becomes the one who is annoyed.,

2points

Monarch cat lady 1 year ago

Well to start my pillow is NOT my pillow, my food is not my food, I go pee babette goes with me sometime 3 others ( I have 9 so lots of rules) you do NOT get coffee before their breakfast! They must have 5 different bowls of water and a fountain. No crunches on top of food we no eat til crunchies!!! There's 100's more

1point

Jude Laskowski 1 year ago

We are their slaves.

0points

Lindy Mac 1 year ago

If you haven't seen "Simon's Cat" animations and still cartoons - you are in for a treat. He covers just about everything in this post ....no we haven't learned the name of the cat..... but it is Simon's! (website & YouTube)

1point

Jude Laskowski 1 year ago

I LOVE Simon's Cat!!

0points

Bored Trash Panda 1 year ago

After reading all of these, I have decided my cat is not a normal cat, or she forgot how to cat. She barely does anything it seems like normal cats do.

1point

Jude Laskowski 1 year ago

Enjoy it while you can. Your cat will read things and learn how to cat.

0points

Mad McQueen 1 year ago

If going down the stairs they must cross in front of your foot mid air to test your agility. Falling is failing. Now I use a light an go down the middle so I watch their shadows. Yes. 4 cats try to kill me every morning to race for the food.

1point

Kenny Kulbiski 1 year ago

Even though the food bowl has been in the same place for 16 years I must be shown its location every time I'm hungry. I'll notify you with an ear piercing yowl.

1point

Cyndielouwhoo 1 year ago

"I must check every pocket of your backpack or purse before leaving in case you're stealing treats or toys."

1point

Cyndielouwhoo 1 year ago

Anything you send to the evil loud paper spitting monster (printer) must be claimed immediately or else he hunts you down and complains until you comply.

1point

LapCat 1 year ago

No doors are allowed to be closed (bedroom, bathroom etc) or they will burst in like the SWAT team.

1point

Livingwithcfs 6 months ago

Running out of nighttime treats will result in getting slapped at 6 in the morning

0points

Janelle Collard Premium 1 year ago

"If I am sleeping in your lap, you are not allowed to get up until I am done with you. Addendum #1: And no sneezing! It wakes me up, jiggles your lap + the noise scares me."

0points

Caroline Driver 1 year ago

As soon as I come down from washing and dressing in the morning, my cat comes for her brushing time. Also, when we are eating dinner (on our laps), she will come and inspect what we are eating, even if she doesn't want any, and she will bother my partner for pets by standing on her hind legs and waving her paw at him.

0points

HappySquirrel 1 year ago

Mine has developed a routine that enforces his set of rules for feeding time & scooping of the litter box. STEP 1: Plaintive meows and sad eyes. STEP 2: Plaintive meows accompanied by gentle taps on my arm as I sit at the computer. STEP 3: Gentle bites to the forearm that's resting on the arm of the chair - if he can reach the REALLY tender part of your arm (the underside), he goes for that first, to let you know he means business. STEP 4: Time to escalate matters. If all other steps have not resulted in food-dish-filling-and-litterbox-maintenance, he places one paw on my deskside trash can and starts to rock it back and forth, while eyeing me intently - as if to say, "I'll do it. I swear to all the cat gods that I will!" If that is ignored, we move to DEFCON-4: he knocks the trash can over and runs like hell, because he knows I'll leap out of my chair at this point.

0points

Britgrlva81 1 year ago

I'm not allowed to place anything on the right bottom corner of the bed, that's his spot to sleep. Also if you stir awake on the weekend, i will sit staring at your face til you get up to feed me.

0points

Aboredpanda 1 year ago (edited)

If I've been out the cat must inspect my breath upon returning, for determining what I have had to eat. Poison control? 😅

0points

Aboredpanda 1 year ago (edited)

The oldest cat must be let out when he wants, signified by a single meow as he stands by the door. If ignored screaming will ensue. If still ignored, he will come over and stare pointedly at us, sometimes sucking up by giving some cuddles. If STILL ignored, he has several tactics; bite a plant, scratch furniture, jump on a table, terrorize the other cat. So as previously stated... he MUST be let out when he wants. Having him inside for medical reasons at times is living with constant terrorization. Sometimes the weather is bad and he doesn't want to go out after all. At all such times it is our fault that it's windy/rainy, and this elicits passive agressive behavior, escalating into foot slaps (without claws). :')

0points

Aboredpanda 1 year ago (edited)

One cat must be told when it's bed time, and asked to come to bed for however many times she deigns necessary. If not asked, she has a special ability to make us feel guilty. She will then wait for me spesifically to get ready, either outside the bathroom door, or at the stairs/top of stairs. She must recieve anything between one and three headkisses on the journey to the bed, all in spesific locations. On a rare occation when feeling extra affectionate, a fourth and fifth kiss, also in spesific locations. In the bedroom she will must lie on my duvet so I cannot get in, then my partner must ask her to come over for cuddles. If he is not there I must pat his duvet and she will trudge over there and take his spot. It must always be in this order. When he is there and she is finished cuddling, she will asume the guard position at the end of the bed nearest the door, thus in command of the room.

0points

Doluf 1 year ago

*specific

0points

Gabby Ghoul 1 year ago

Our cat rules: breakfast is at 4am sharp. Dinner is at 4pm sharp. Snack time is at 7pm sharp.

0points

Eevi 1 year ago

My cats eat dinner at 5PM. Not a minute before, not a minute after or I'm in trouble :D

0points

Dorothy Stovall 1 year ago

Ours is breakfast - 4:30 on the dot. If you wake up in the night it must be food time.

2points

LesAnimaux 1 year ago

Dinner is at 5.45 sharp. I will try every day to be fed at 5.30. I do understand the concept of 'later', I will loudly complain before stomping away, appearing a second later to give you a mean stare. After breakfast, I will yell at the window until you open it. During winter, I will stick my head out the window and yell at the world. I love belly rubs, but only for 3.2 seconds.

-1point

POST

Ms.GB 1 year ago (edited)

17points

Yu Pan 1 year ago

My cat's rule: "You must watch me eat. I don't care if you are in the kitchen, watching TV, sitting on the porcelain bowl, or dying with a knife in your chest. When I eat, you come look.”

8points

Nykky 1 year ago

Probably a safety thing. They really trust you to look out for them and don't feel comfortable eating without you

3points

YTK 1 year ago

“Any and all cheez-it’s one wishes to enjoy will have a tax payed directly to the king. Additionally, all mini-chip bags shall be investigated by the king.”

7points

Catman (He/Him) 1 year ago

If a cup has no lid, it's not our cup, it's the cats cup.

3points

Jude Laskowski 1 year ago

Years ago, I had a cat who loved my tea (with milk). I had to buy a cup with a lid.

0points

Dorothy Stovall 1 year ago

My Catgirl loves sweet ice tea, especially if I set it in the side of the tub while I soak.

0points

Cyndielouwhoo 1 year ago

Same here, except anything carbonated, even just water...he doesn't lik

0points

Deborah B 1 year ago

3points

Cyndielouwhoo 1 year ago

It's a trap!

3points

GhostlySnail (she/her) 1 year ago

Aha. I have now uncovered my dogs secret. She is a cat! I always suspected. But seriously my dog does a ton of these things lol

3points

KimB 1 year ago

Oh you're going down the basement steps? And it's dark? Time for the panther race! Must run in front of Mommy when she can't see me because I'm all black : D

2points

Doodles1983 1 year ago

2points

Omiyaru 1 year ago

2points

Monarch cat lady 1 year ago

1point

Jude Laskowski 1 year ago

We are their slaves.

0points

Lindy Mac 1 year ago

1point

Jude Laskowski 1 year ago

I LOVE Simon's Cat!!

0points

Bored Trash Panda 1 year ago

After reading all of these, I have decided my cat is not a normal cat, or she forgot how to cat. She barely does anything it seems like normal cats do.

1point

Jude Laskowski 1 year ago

Enjoy it while you can. Your cat will read things and learn how to cat.

0points

Mad McQueen 1 year ago

1point

Kenny Kulbiski 1 year ago

Even though the food bowl has been in the same place for 16 years I must be shown its location every time I'm hungry. I'll notify you with an ear piercing yowl.

1point

Cyndielouwhoo 1 year ago

"I must check every pocket of your backpack or purse before leaving in case you're stealing treats or toys."

1point

Cyndielouwhoo 1 year ago

Anything you send to the evil loud paper spitting monster (printer) must be claimed immediately or else he hunts you down and complains until you comply.

1point

LapCat 1 year ago

No doors are allowed to be closed (bedroom, bathroom etc) or they will burst in like the SWAT team.

1point

Livingwithcfs 6 months ago

Running out of nighttime treats will result in getting slapped at 6 in the morning

0points

Janelle Collard Premium 1 year ago

"If I am sleeping in your lap, you are not allowed to get up until I am done with you. Addendum #1: And no sneezing! It wakes me up, jiggles your lap + the noise scares me."

0points

Caroline Driver 1 year ago

0points

HappySquirrel 1 year ago

0points

Britgrlva81 1 year ago

I'm not allowed to place anything on the right bottom corner of the bed, that's his spot to sleep. Also if you stir awake on the weekend, i will sit staring at your face til you get up to feed me.

0points

Aboredpanda 1 year ago (edited)

If I've been out the cat must inspect my breath upon returning, for determining what I have had to eat. Poison control? 😅

0points

Aboredpanda 1 year ago (edited)

0points

Aboredpanda 1 year ago (edited)

0points

Doluf 1 year ago

*specific

0points

Gabby Ghoul 1 year ago

Our cat rules: breakfast is at 4am sharp. Dinner is at 4pm sharp. Snack time is at 7pm sharp.

0points

Eevi 1 year ago

My cats eat dinner at 5PM. Not a minute before, not a minute after or I'm in trouble :D

0points

Dorothy Stovall 1 year ago

Ours is breakfast - 4:30 on the dot. If you wake up in the night it must be food time.

2points