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Those unfamiliar with owning a cat might think that having one is just that - another living being occupying the same house as you. They might also think the same about dogs, and that you’d be the one implementing house rules for your furry friend, which, my friends, is an absolute lie. You’re never the one to impose rules on a cat, and it is always vice versa; it’s cat house rules, not yours! And if you’re thinking that we’re pulling your leg here, just take a look at the stories of pet cats ruling these Redditors’ households - not only are the submissions in this AskReddit thread worthy of being called comedy gold, but they are also the truth and nothing but. 

If you’re still dubious that a cat rules the house if given a chance, here are a couple of real-life examples. Say you’re used to keeping your clothes on that one chair we all have designated for the ‘might use it again’ pile. Now, your cat also thinks that it’s their favorite chair to chill out on. You battle for it for a while - you might even offer another perfectly fine chair for it to lounge on - but then you realize it isn’t you who decides on house rules for cats, but rather the cat who decides house rules for you, and you just give up. And that’s just a very basic example! Cats are much more elaborate with their plans to rule your household, and they always, always win, the little tyrants. 

Right-o, ready for one heck of an adventure reading these people’s confessions of cats becoming their overlords? Once you’re through with it, you’ll definitely understand the real meaning behind the ‘my house, my cat, my rules’ saying. And if these fun yet kinda threatening stories from this Reddit thread don’t make you want a cat less than before, you’re definitely good for adopting one!

#1

Ginger cat sitting on stairs "Usually, by 10 pm I'm in bed, where I watch TV for an hour or so before I sleep. 10 pm is cat cuddle time.

If I am not in my room by 10 pm then everyone gets a lecture from my old tom cat. If I'm not home, my husband will be yelled at.

No one can touch the cat but me (I think his previous owner must have been abusive) and he is obsessed with me. Huge old tom that acts more like a dog than a cat. He has huge PTSD eyes, so he is always looking at you with an expression that says 'I've seen some s*it. Now pet me.'"

Opandemonium , imgur.com Report

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Hugh Cookson
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well done you for taking him on. 'Difficult' cats or dogs are ultimately much more rewarding than 'normal' pets.

ValdaDeDieu
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

All pets are rewarding. The difficult ones NEED you more. I had the best dog for almost 20 years. He was easy to potty-train, never stole food, quiet when we needed him to be, smart as a whip, real personality: (he had his "doggie enemies" ; three doggie girlfriends) obedient to a fault -- yet, what a joy. What an absolute, utter JOY. Love in a fur suit. I'm crying now. I miss him as if he had been a part of me. 2nd-Fave-B...-png-1.jpg 2nd-Fave-BigM-Pic-6471002e37dba-png-1.jpg 3rd-Fave-B...d1-png.jpg 3rd-Fave-BigM-Pic-64710108247d1-png.jpg

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Fo An
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"I've seen some s**t. Now pet me." Is the perfect description of the kitty in this picture.

Libstak
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My Katsy was like this if I hadn't gone upstairs by the time she thought was bed time she would meow loudly while stomping, yes stomping down the stairs till she was right in front of me then meow continuously until I got up and went to bed. So damn cute.

Wendy Schkade
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have a once feral wont let me pet him during the day but I better be in bed by 11 and dish out plenty of petting while he talks to me.

Susan Robinson
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow, I could have written some of this! My cat, that I love more than life itself, belonged to my mother-in-law. However, she has some serious health issues going on and can’t properly take care of him so we have him. He is the sweetest older cat (nobody knows exactly HOW old, but over 10 based on teeth), and he makes sure I have a bedtime, gets grumpy if I am up too late…. Shoot, I am gonna be talking a lot on here, aren’t I? 🤷🏻‍♀️

Marinasongs1432
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Having a cat is rewarding, especially one that needs more love. You saved the poor kitty, so pure

Janine Hunt-Jackson
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My girlcat wouldn't let me touch her for THREE years unless I was in the bathroom! Then she'd throw herself down, roll over, & demand belly rubs!

J. Kasilo
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Fun reading but don't let your cat outside, Please! - https://abcbirds.org/program/cats-indoors/cats-and-birds/

J. Kasilo
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Force yourself to read the article, many cat owners do not realize what a toll cats take on bird populations - it is a GOOD read !

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Nicole Omalley
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Pretty amazing this cat trusts you so much. Animals can sense things we can't about people. You must be pretty dang on awesome to win the love if this beautiful fur baby

Ms.GB
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My cats have the same ritual, if I'm not in bed by a certain time I hear about from both of them.

H R
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Trauma response. I dare say cats shows the same trauma responses as humans. I believe, no matter what creature you are, human/cat/iguana... the trauma responses are the same.

Karen Klinck Klinck
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My cat's bedtime was 11. If I was not on the pillow, at 11:05 he'd come to the living room door and whine. It got to the point where I kept stack of Harlequins by my chair (unreadable, but good for chucking in his general direction to shut him up.)

Louisa Spoke
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had to be in bed by 11pm no matter if we had guests or not. He screamed at everyone that I was to go to bed. I bought him a heat pad and put it on the end of the bed. He just wanted to be warm.

Tim Nicebutdim
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My last cat was like that, we got her at 7, she eventually trusted me, not my wife. Mainly because she could bite and claw me and I wouldn't berate her, she would only sit on me if there was a blanket or duvet between us, she tear you to pieces if you tried to pick her up. She went blind at 10 but still carried on, she was 2.5kg the whole time we had her. It destroyed me to have her put down, the look of betrayal she gave me lingers to this day.

Moosy Girl
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My bedtime is 23:30 max according to my cat, if it goes past that there will be yelling and if it goes too far past that there will be breaking stuff noisily.

Couragetcd
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Our oldest cat decided to take on our 6 as his human while 6 was still kicking him from in my tum. He knows that the 6 won't stay still when awake, so as soon as he is asleep kitty is there lying on his human purring smugly. If 6 isn't asleep by the expected time, I'm the one that gets the affronted looks and sniffs.

Mary Bricklin
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've got a cat that does this too. She will sit at my feet between 8 and 9 pm and yell at me if I'm not in bed by then.

Earl Grey
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Doggie cat! Yes, seriously! Same with mine and no one will believe me.

Mimi M
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In case you were wondering that is the pic of the actual cat. I checked.

Beck Parkay
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Awww. Bless that old boy. Better keep that 10 pm bedtime so you won't get cussed out!

Darla Greene
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I too had an Abused Cat, she passed 5/20/2023. She was in No Way "Difficult", she was a Special Needs Cat", High Maintenance but in No Way Difficult.

JenniferNapier
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Blessings for loving your old tom....You are his Person....Bless Your Person for understanding ..Bless Brave Boy for trusting

SK Bruning
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I never laughed so hard in my life at your description of old Tom there at the end. I believe he probably has CPTSD. It’s chronic!😅😅😂

HelmGrass
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

my 18 y.o. cat is the same and funny enough we share your evening routine.

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#2

Cat sleeping on man chest "They must sit as close to my face as possible, preferably on my face. My inability to breathe is my problem."

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Dena Goodwin
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have an old boy that showed up at our house and adopted us. He’s indoor/outdoor and refuses to stay indoors all the time. When he’s in, if I’m asleep, he insists on trying to sleep on my face. I can’t breathe so we have a wresting match until he finally decides he’s not going to win and moves to lay down by the side of my head.

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#3

A black cat sitting on a bathroom counter "Leave the door open, you don't need privacy in the toilet."

BloodAngel85 replied:
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#4

White cat on white bed "Bed making will always include at least one cat jumping on the bed to 'help'.

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Francine Govan
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well DUH ... bed making is not a chore, hooman ... it's a game that must be played!

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#5

Cat's paws "If there is a face-sized hole in the center of the food bowl, the bowl is effectively empty."

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#6

Black cat sitting in blue litter box "If you do anything to my poop box, I must immediately rechristen it."

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CAT /ᐠ。ꞈ。ᐟ QUEEN
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

only the peasents of my kingdom use poop boxes, us higher class cats use whats called "plants in a vase" mush more proper.

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#7

White and black cat lying on white textile "After sleeping, changing the sleep position will not be tolerated."

meech7607 replied:
"My cat used to sleep in the valley that's made by the blanket between your legs. One night I was in that twilight almost asleep phase and he was sleeping down there, and I didn't realize it. I rolled over and catapulted him off of the bed."

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Zoey Rayne
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sister's cat: "Nighttime cuddles are a must." *curls up against side of my sister's leg* Sis: "It's a hot summer night. Leave a few inches." *Scoots over* Cat: *Follows and presses against leg* Sis: *Scoots over* Cat: *Follows and presses against leg* Sis: *reaches edge of bed, goes to other side* Cat: *repeats process*

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#8

Gray cat looking straight "You can touch but don't touch."

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Karen Krause
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

One of my cats constantly shows his tummy when I'm petting him, but it's a trap. You can touch me, nope, no touch!

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#9

Cat standing near opened-door "I must be in every room you are. I will claw at the door and carpet if I am not allowed in.

Do not follow me around. I want my space."

DOTHETHING_ replied:
"Cat must have the option of being in any room you are in. Will check stuff out then leave immediately. If you close the door then the cycle repeats."

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#11

Cats Sitting near Building Wall and Door "Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out. Let her in. Let her out."

BillohRly asked:
"Have you tried letting her out? And then let her in? And then letting her out and then letting her..."

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Linda C
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Your cat is worried about your health, sitting is the new smoking. So they're getting you to move

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#12

White Cat on Brown Wooden Floor "Are you beginning to fall asleep? Then I must run wide open from one end of the house to the other at least four times. The galloping sound will help you sleep."

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Powerful Katrinka
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I actually find the sound of my cats having their 3:00 am rodeo quite soothing. It means that all's right with the world.

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#13

Cat drinking faucet water in the bathroom "Going to the bathroom? Need to drink from the faucet. Walk past the bathroom? Need faucet water. Make eye contact? Need faucet water."

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#14

Cat lying on bed beside women "No placing of hands or feet outside of blankets."

soitsmydayoff replied:
"To add onto this, no sudden movements underneath the blanket, or else it's fair game."

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LuLuBelle
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I trained my cats when they were tiny kittens that attacking feet or hands in bed was strictly forbidden, and made a point of never ever using my hands or feet as toys for them to play with so they wouldn't be confused.As a result I have 7 cats who do not attack my feet at night. It's not hard to train your cats, and it's important not to tolerate or encourage "cute" behavior in kittens that will be a problem when they're adults.

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#15

Cat and dog in living room "Cats get the spot on the bed that they want, dogs may have the leftovers."

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Chia
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My Newfoundland used to lie on the couch and my kitty would curl up right on top of her. They would nap like that.

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#16

Furry Cat lying on the Floor "You may attempt to knit/sew, but I will be attacking the wool every five seconds. Extreme knitting."

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#17

White Cat Licking a Crystal Glass "Any uncovered food will be licked."

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Nay Wilson
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My kittens very quickly learn that I’m blind in my right eye and will trick me into turning my head away from my plate by staring hard at something. When I turn to see what’s got their attention they snatch some food off the plate and run out the room to eat it

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#18

Cat sitting near TV "I am more important than Game of Thrones. To illustrate this point, I will frequently stand on the coffee table, directly in your line of sight to the television."

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#19

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Nosirrow
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My cat joined us when we had three dogs. Once they stopped wanting to hunt her down, they sort of accepted kitty. She wanted to be the boss and failed. With a new dog, she was more patient bc he was young.

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#20

Cat peeping near edge of table "I want food right now but I will eat later."

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Hugh Cookson
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yup, 5am start for me, so put food down at 4.30 before heading off with 2 cats eagerly waiting and yowing. Get back at 3 to find less than a quarter eaten but expecting fresh .... spoiled little sods !! Love them both to pieces, 20 year old brother and sister, slowing down a bit but still active, long may that continue.

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#21

Cat sitting on Christmas tree branch "Christmas is for us.

Christmas trees are exclusively for us."

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#22

Orange cat drinking milk from white bowl "If you do not maintain visual contact with cheese products at all times you agree to forfeit your right to finish eating said cheese products."

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Nosirrow
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My cat lived dairy except for white cheese, or quark. So I thought cheesecake was safe. No! Cats clearly didn't get the memo about lactose intolerance.

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#23

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#25

"My face is itchy. Please scratch it without touching me."

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ValdaDeDieu
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And don't stop till I tell you to. Or there will be conssssssequences.

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#26

Cat in the fridge "The fridge is a paradise. Don't quite know why they like it in there either."

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#27

Cat walking on archit "All showers must be supervised from in between the shower curtains. No exceptions. Sometimes even on top."

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Zoey Rayne
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm glad my little cat just "loafs" and waits on the bathmat while I shower.

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#28

Cat stretching "If they meow in the middle of the night, I must respond immediately (or else be hit in the face with their sharp claws)."

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Hugh Cookson
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Trust me, when you hear then sound of a cat in the early stages of throwing up on your bed in the middle of the night, regardless of how tired, drunk or inept you are, you will be shoving him/her off the bed in a nanosecond, followed by covering the pile of sick or hairball with toilet paper until the morning ; in my case, leaving it for my lovely Wife to clear up (before you condemn me, if I did it, it would be joined by my own vomit ; I clear the stuff up from the other end....)

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#29

"You're awake? Feed me. I don't care if it's 2 am, feed me."

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Jennifer Checki
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Cat smacks person in the face repeatedly, then, when person wakes up, cat: “oh you’re awake, too! What a coincidence. Feed me.”

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#31

"The water needs to be perfectly full and clean at all times, it can't even be medium-full."

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CT
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But the cat will still go and drink the stale old rainwater outside

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#32

Cat in a paper bag "All food is subject to taste testing."

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Nay Wilson
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I once left a loaf of brioche bread on my counter, still wrapped in the plastic bag. When I went to get some an hour later the cats had gnawed through the bag to the bready goodness inside and eaten half the loaf

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#33

"When you shut off all the lights to go to bed, that is ancient cat language for war. And therefore I will attack your legs as soon as the lights go off."

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#34

Black cat playing with feather "The toys I played with yesterday must be replaced with brand new, different toys today."

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#36

"Dogs do not touch cat toys, but cats can have free reign over dog toys."

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Cat sleeping near computer "Cat goes to the left of the laptop, blocking the vent."

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#38

"The spring on the bottom of the door is your new alarm clock."

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#39

Cat laying on black curtain "We will climb up your curtains and ruin them."

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ValdaDeDieu
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

All things vertical yield to the feline domesticus - sometimes with catastrophic results.

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#40

Cat licking her mouth "Any accessible bread products will be destroyed (not eaten, just shredded)."

BrutalHonestyBuffalo replied:
"My cats don't destroy bread - but for whatever reason, if we leave a bread product unattended - you can be sure there will be one giant bite taken out of it. Plastic/paper and all."

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#41

A Dog and Cat Fighting "Cats eat before dogs."

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ValdaDeDieu
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Dogs serve humans and so, clearly beneath cats - who believe humans were put on earth to serve them.

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#42

Cat sitting on green wooden bench "The picnic bench in the garden is my territory. If you are eating lunch out there, you must first appease me with tidbits."

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#43

"Any food placed before you belongs to me. What I do with that bite of food is my business. I'll probably just sniff it for two seconds and leave it there. Your food sucks. It smells great, but it sucks."

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#44

Cat standing on dinning "I will stay off the left side of the counter as long as you let me sit next to the microwave and stare at the food."

scribblefrog , Nick Karvounis Report

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Nay Wilson
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My cats like to sit on top of the microwave and hang over the door and watch as the food rotates

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#45

"I must have the last corner or your vegemite toast. It is mine. Not yours. I will swipe it from your hand."

reddit.com Report

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#46

"I will hide behind the desk all day."

absurded Report

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Nykky
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My desk has a little cubby underneath the main part that the cats have a rotating fascination about. Don't know why.

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