Woman Wants To Drop Out As Bridesmaid At Sister’s Wedding After Her Ridiculous Hairstyle Request
It’s not weird to have an idea for a dream wedding, planned to the most minute detail. After all, it’s supposed to be this once-in-a-lifetime magical event. But wedding planning can veer into becoming unhinged when the happy couple starts demanding bodily modifications just so the party looks exactly how they want them to.
A woman shared the story of her being a bridesmaid in her sister’s wedding until she learned that the bride required her to cut her prized long hair by about six inches. In the spirit of most bridezilla stories, when she refused this completely unreasonable request, the bride threw a tantrum.
More info: Reddit
Long, well-kept hair is years’ worth of work, patience, and maintenance
Image credits: NomadSoul1 (not the actual photo)
So it’s no surprise that this bridesmaid was taken aback by the bride’s cosmetic demands
Image credits: tamaraelnova (not the actual photo)
Instead, the bride doubled down and even tried to get her fiance to weigh in on the bridesmaid’s hair
Image credits: LightFieldStudios (not the actual photo)
Image credits: punziebridesmaid
The stress of wedding planning sometimes turns a bride into a bridezilla
Not to justify the behavior of the bridezilla, but the culture around weddings does put a lot of unnecessary stress on a woman. Many brides develop eating disorders in the lead-up to the wedding itself, as they desperately feel like they need to lose weight. Others eat to offset the stress of wedding planning, thereby creating an unhealthy relationship with food which leads to more issues and stress down the line. Some scholars believe the obsession some brides have with the cosmetic and physical appearance of both themselves and everything at the wedding is a coping mechanism to avoid thinking about internal feelings. The doubt, fear, and uncertainty of married life is a stress many to-be-married couples just don’t want to work through before tying the knot.
It’s no secret that roughly half of the marriages in the US end in divorce. Despite the fairytale visuals most people can imagine when thinking about a wedding, the reality of marriage is an emotional commitment. Some studies suggest that the more a person stresses about the physical aspects of a wedding, the dress, clothes, venue, and so on, the more likely the marriage will end in divorce. To connect with the previous idea, engaged couples will ignore resolving and dealing with emotional issues by overfocusing on the tangible parts of the ceremony. Deep down, this stress doesn’t actually disappear, just because all of the couple’s mental energy is invested into thinking about seating arrangements.
Image credits: Olivia Bauso (not the actual photo)
Often, entitled brides are just overwhelmed and overworked humans trying to put on a pretty big event
Besides being at more risk of eating disorders, brides also tend to do disproportionately more work with wedding planning. The larger the wedding, the more the bride works. This can build a feeling of resentment that boils just beneath the surface, which in turn creates a feeling of entitlement. After all, or so the logical leap goes, if I am doing all the work, it should at least be done my way. This also compounds the stress of becoming married, as the bride begins to feel like the wedding planning will be a good indicator of the realities of married life. It’s an unfortunate, vicious cycle that leads some stressed-out brides to be mocked as bridezillas. On the bright side, the groom in OP’s story also seemed to lend a hand and the bride came to her senses in the end.
Now, entitled, petty and unhinged people do exist, there is no way around it. But there are likely just as many overworked brides organizing a massive event costing thousands of dollars and involving a sizable crowd of guests all on their own. The simple solution would be for the other partner to step in and lend a hand. Even better, the happy couple could turn to family to at least get some support. This could be a tall ask since not all families are on the same page in their relationships. But the bottom line is that a bridezilla can sometimes be prevented before she makes landfall, but it requires a bit of work and some emotional honesty.
Image credits: Maria Orlova (not the actual photo)
Commenters shared their amusement at the bride’s entitlement and OP answered some follow-up questions
I do not understand bridezillas! When I got married, I was just happy to have my friends stand with me as bridesmaids. I bought their dress and *offered* to have my hairdresser do their hair (up or down, their choice). Some took the offer and some didn’t. 20 years later I’m still married to the love of my life and what their hair looked like that day makes no difference.
Exactly!! Why ppl need to spend too much money and energy on this one day is beyond me. Is it a competition or siomething? I really don't get it. All that money could help a just married couple A LOT in their life, for example down payment on a home, starting college funding for a kid, etc... Such a waste.
Load More Replies...You know, I've had two weddings. The first my bridesmaids got matching dresses, and a kilt for my brides man - the rest was 100% up to them, how they wanted their hair, their shoes, make up etc - it was however they felt comfortable. My second wedding we totally surprised out mothers and kids on the day and they were told about the wedding literally 5 minutes before it happened with just each of our mums and our 4 kids there - so obviously I had no say in outfits and wouldn't have wanted to either. This idea you become the centre of the universe for the day is absurd. Folk need to stop obsessing over a wedding and start planning a marriage
can't state that often enough: Never ever get involved in a bridezilla wedding. And even attending as a guest should be put into consideration.
I do not understand bridezillas! When I got married, I was just happy to have my friends stand with me as bridesmaids. I bought their dress and *offered* to have my hairdresser do their hair (up or down, their choice). Some took the offer and some didn’t. 20 years later I’m still married to the love of my life and what their hair looked like that day makes no difference.
Exactly!! Why ppl need to spend too much money and energy on this one day is beyond me. Is it a competition or siomething? I really don't get it. All that money could help a just married couple A LOT in their life, for example down payment on a home, starting college funding for a kid, etc... Such a waste.
Load More Replies...You know, I've had two weddings. The first my bridesmaids got matching dresses, and a kilt for my brides man - the rest was 100% up to them, how they wanted their hair, their shoes, make up etc - it was however they felt comfortable. My second wedding we totally surprised out mothers and kids on the day and they were told about the wedding literally 5 minutes before it happened with just each of our mums and our 4 kids there - so obviously I had no say in outfits and wouldn't have wanted to either. This idea you become the centre of the universe for the day is absurd. Folk need to stop obsessing over a wedding and start planning a marriage
can't state that often enough: Never ever get involved in a bridezilla wedding. And even attending as a guest should be put into consideration.
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