Your daughter needs to find other friends. If she’d done that at my place she’d have not welcome in my house anymore. I hope you spoke to one of her parents about her behaviour

I don't have compassion left for that s**t. My kids are products of a divorce the are respectful and kind. My stepkid's however we're influenced by a hateful biomom that told them to act up. So no divorce is not the problem. Being a hateful person while raising or at least while visiting your kid in my stepkid's case is the problem. You should never teach kids to do it.

I'd be worried about my child spending time w a child like that for fear of how they might snap.

Be very careful with your daughter. If that girl is that possessive of her, and something made her mad enough to carve into furniture without remorse, the next time she might feel like teaching your daughter a more direct lesson. We all know what happened in the movie, Fatal Attraction, but kids can be just as dangerous as adults. Anyone that is borderline psychopathic is someone to certainly protect your family from.

Did you force her to learn how to repair it? I certainly would have. She can go to juvenile hall and get the snot beat out of her by kids who want to see her scream in pain, or she can fix something that she had contempt over again and again until she does it right. If she deliberately destroys it further, she gets kiddie jail AND I make her pay for the full replacement of the piece. That means "irreplaceable family heirloom" makes you my slave for the summer, and I WILL make you pay in sweat the entire time.

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have you even considered that maybe that child is being abused?? you people are sick. kids aren’t psychopaths waiting to hurt people. They Act Out when bad things are happening to them. yk how many kids i’ve known or grown up around who acted like this? turns out most of them were being severely neglected or abused. a lot of the times sexually. you people are so sucked into this fake pop psych c**p that you’d rather invent a novelty horror story than stop and think WAIT maybe this child is being harmed

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What she needs is a belt

I don't think they're thought out power plays. But I have noticed divorced parents sometimes spoil their kids because they don't want to be the "bad guy" to their co-parent. Unfortunately, that's backwards because good parents are parents that set boundaries and consistent age-appropriate consequences.

My first husband was a divorced dad w a daughter and I tell you my life was made miserable. She did what she wanted and how dare I try to discipline her. Anytime he "disciplined" (which was simply "don't do that") her he'd say it was bc of me! He'd tell her she was making me mad.

Omg ☹️

Why wasn't the kid cleaning up the mess they made on the wall as part of their punishment?

OM F'NG! I had a child when l started dating my husband. Fortunately, he was already well behaved. I made it clear that HE was EXPECTED to discipline him because l didn't want any "wait until your mother gets home" scenarios. Discipline has to take place at the time of the offense to be truly effective. You can't let him keep playing outside then get a punishment when l got home from work 4-5 hours later. This dad should have not only disciplined her but encouraged the OP to do so also if they were planning to blend the families. What kind of ish is this if she couldn't do that. No way. Seeeeee ya!

you parents and your bragging about your kids not “”misbehaving”” god it’s annoying. you as a parent sign up for all this s**t even the “crazy psycho” s**t. learn how to deal with it for your own kid bc anything can happen. the world is full of traumatic incidents waiting to happen and any one of them can make your kid act out. hope you respond right instead of pulling out a belt like my family

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Exactly. In this situation, OP *IS* an AH for not putting boundaries up sooner AND ENFORCING THEM! Her HOUSE, her RULES, NO second chances!!

Exactly!

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stay away from kids.

Yes, either she blames the OP for her parent's divorce, or she might think that if she can split up OP and her dad, then her parents might get back together. Either way, OP - and her belongings - including her son, would have been targets for this psychopath in the making.

that poor child. the bio mom needs to be cut away from her daughter if she’s going to use her like this.

That's sad. You didn't dodge a bullet. You dodged a landmine.

😆 🤣

Don't shave her head. She already feels angry and powerless. Maybe of the father paid some attention to the daughter instead of being on his phone... many men foster their children on others to watch. It's not fair or right to anyone.

You're failing to see the real issue- the dad not being a dad. He brushes it off making it op's problem but it's not actually okay if she corrects the child. That's his job and he's not doing it and the only option she has is to be a door mat or tell him off. She chose correctly.

Go slower? They were dating for over a year prior to meeting each other's kids. Sounds like they were trying to do the right thing.

I agree with you, April. We're talking about a 9-year-old, that's been through and still experiencing a level of trauma and confusion about what is happening in her world. No doubt she feels a level of insecurity. If she were 19 instead of 9, I could understand why people here would be saying she may have personality disorders and joking about shaving her head. I wonder if this is truly malicious behavior, or if it's actually a skewed attempt by a small child to actually BOND with OP in the case of the scrapbook. She specifically used OPs photo albums to make a scrapbook. It sounds a bit like she might be trying to make a gift for the OP. She stated her BF was pretty hands-off in parenting, and I wonder if her bio-mom is the same way. The OP sounds like she has instilled a healthy balance of structure and self-discipline for her own son. Maybe that's why the BFs daughter is acting up- she's not used to boundaries being set. I'll finish my post below

I mean...I used to write on the walls when I was a kid. Or rather, just once. Was trying to show off my "mad spelling skills", to my grandmother. Was about five. Unfortunately for me, she did not see it in the same light I did lol. Aside from that, I'd generally ask for her help or permission if I wanted to borrow (or unintentionally destroy/repurpose) something in the house. She'd usually let me know if certain items or actions were alright to fuss with. Which...kinda makes me think. Kids DO look to their parents/guardians for guidance. Destructive daughter is definitely at fault for being destructive, but...she's nine. Nine, and she's already acting out, and disregarding what little participation her father is offering in regards to "consequences for one's actions". Which says a lot about her dad in the first place, if not potentially the girl's biological mother.

Rxactly