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“I Was Like ‘What?’”: Woman Immediately Breaks Up With BF After Meeting His Girl Best Friend
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“I Was Like ‘What?’”: Woman Immediately Breaks Up With BF After Meeting His Girl Best Friend

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It’s a truth universally acknowledged that women should have each other’s backs, right? Well, not everyone got that memo.

One woman on Reddit experienced this firsthand when she joined her boyfriend for dinner with his friends. She was excited to meet his circle, but things took a turn when she was introduced to his female best friend from college.

This ‘bestie’ quickly got a little too close for comfort and bragged about being the reason for all his past breakups. That was all it took for the woman to call it quits with her boyfriend right then and there.

RELATED:

    The woman went to dinner with her boyfriend of 8 months to meet his friends

    Image credits: Image-Source (not the actual photo)

    But when she was introduced to his ‘girl bestie,’ things quickly went downhill

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    Image credits: ImageSourceCur (not the actual photo)

    Can men and women be “just friends”?

    Image credits: Trinity Kubassek (not the actual photo)

    The story shared by OP about feeling uneasy when you see your partner with a close friend of the opposite sex is probably something many can relate to. After all, it’s part of a debate that’s been around forever: can heterosexual men and women really just be friends?

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    In the grand scheme of things, friendships between men and women in countries like the U.S. are relatively new. It wasn’t until the feminist movement of the 1960s that they began to take off, as men and women started interacting more as equals in both social and work settings.

    However, it took some time for these friendships to become more normalized. In 1985, sociologist Rebecca G. Adams from the University of North Carolina at Greensboro surveyed 70 senior women and discovered that less than 4 percent of their friends were men.

    Fast forward to 2002, American Demographics magazine found that young adults aged 18-24 were nearly four times more likely than those over 55 to have a best friend of the opposite sex.

    By 2012, research by psychologist April Bleske-Rechek at the University of Wisconsin–Eau Claire showed that nearly all college students had friends of the opposite sex.

    But just how platonic are these friendships? According to Bleske-Rechek, the answer depends on whom you ask. Her team’s study revealed that men were generally more attracted to their female friends than the other way around, and often thought their female friends were attracted to them too.

    Interestingly, men’s guesses about how much their female friends liked them romantically often had little to do with reality and more to do with their own feelings. Men assumed that if they felt something, their female friends must feel it too. On the other hand, women, who typically weren’t attracted to their male friends, assumed this lack of attraction was mutual.

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    Still, many psychologists believe that men and women can have opposite-sex friendships without them becoming a problem in their romantic relationships.

    “With the research on platonic opposite sex relationships nearly non-existent, I can’t site facts and figures. I will say that in my years of couples counseling in San Diego and La Jolla, I’ve come to the conclusion men and women can be friends without a threat to the primary relationship,” says couples therapist Craig Lambert.

    Lambert does add that for these friendships to work, transparency is key. He suggests being upfront about the nature of your friendship with your partner and being clear about any boundaries. It’s also a good idea to avoid too much physical contact with your opposite-sex friend—what might feel harmless to you could make your partner feel jealous.

    And keep your deepest thoughts and feelings for your partner, not your friend. “Are you sharing your hopes, passions, dreams, and fears? Are they sharing theirs with you? Save the most meaningful conversations for your primary relationship.”

    At the end of the day, being able to handle friendships with the opposite sex while in a romantic relationship comes down to good communication and mutual respect. It’s up to you to make it work.

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    Image source: Key-Host-6435

    People in the comments praised the woman for breaking up with her boyfriend on the spot

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    Oleksandra Kyryliuk

    Oleksandra Kyryliuk

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Kyiv-born, Vilnius-dwelling writer with a suitcase full of curiosity. My Master's in International Communication fuels my love for exploring different stories. Whether I'm putting pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard), you might catch me out and about with my film camera, cycling around, or on a quest for the perfect coffee spot. Occasionally seen trying to find inner peace on the yoga mat.

    Read less »
    Oleksandra Kyryliuk

    Oleksandra Kyryliuk

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Kyiv-born, Vilnius-dwelling writer with a suitcase full of curiosity. My Master's in International Communication fuels my love for exploring different stories. Whether I'm putting pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard), you might catch me out and about with my film camera, cycling around, or on a quest for the perfect coffee spot. Occasionally seen trying to find inner peace on the yoga mat.

    Ieva Pečiulytė

    Ieva Pečiulytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I'm a Visual Editor for Bored Panda. I’m also an analog collage artist. My love for images and experience in layering goes well with both creating collages by hand and working with digital images as an Editor. When I’m not using my kitchen area as an art studio I also do various experiments making my own cosmetics or brewing kombucha. When I’m not at home you would most definitely find me attending a concert or walking my dog.

    Read less »

    Ieva Pečiulytė

    Ieva Pečiulytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I'm a Visual Editor for Bored Panda. I’m also an analog collage artist. My love for images and experience in layering goes well with both creating collages by hand and working with digital images as an Editor. When I’m not using my kitchen area as an art studio I also do various experiments making my own cosmetics or brewing kombucha. When I’m not at home you would most definitely find me attending a concert or walking my dog.

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    Trillian
    Community Member
    3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ahahahaha. He was basically giving HER the ultimatum he didn't want to hear and she told him to get stuffed. Good job. This is not a competition.

    ValdaDeDieu
    Community Member
    3 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not even Amex Black Card could handle that charge at the restaurant where OP's Ex and his "Bestie" finally FAFO'd ... Priceless.

    Load More Replies...
    TribbleThinking
    Community Member
    3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So funny that even his friends are on to him and laughing at him. He and BFF are playing a kind of "Mean Girls" power game. What they haven't realised is that time's passing by and where teen girlfriends are puzzled and hurt, 30s girlfriends just suss them as idiot losers.

    TribbleThinking
    Community Member
    3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Add to the game - ask his friends to start rating the breakups. I suspect you're currently in pole position in the rankings. 😄

    Load More Replies...
    Momogi
    Community Member
    3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He is going to put his bff first so why bother making him a lifelong partner? OP is really great with her decision.

    Load More Comments
    Trillian
    Community Member
    3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ahahahaha. He was basically giving HER the ultimatum he didn't want to hear and she told him to get stuffed. Good job. This is not a competition.

    ValdaDeDieu
    Community Member
    3 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not even Amex Black Card could handle that charge at the restaurant where OP's Ex and his "Bestie" finally FAFO'd ... Priceless.

    Load More Replies...
    TribbleThinking
    Community Member
    3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So funny that even his friends are on to him and laughing at him. He and BFF are playing a kind of "Mean Girls" power game. What they haven't realised is that time's passing by and where teen girlfriends are puzzled and hurt, 30s girlfriends just suss them as idiot losers.

    TribbleThinking
    Community Member
    3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Add to the game - ask his friends to start rating the breakups. I suspect you're currently in pole position in the rankings. 😄

    Load More Replies...
    Momogi
    Community Member
    3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He is going to put his bff first so why bother making him a lifelong partner? OP is really great with her decision.

    Load More Comments
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