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40 Toddlers Cracking Adults Up With The Funniest Complaints Shared By People In This Online Group
The mind of a toddler is an absolutely fascinating thing that could easily pass as the 8th Wonder. For these adorable little humans, every day is a new adventure of exploring the world, finding out about new things, and trying to understand yourself while at the same time, attempting to make sense of all of it. And every once in a while, while they're at it, our toddlers happen to accidentally come up with things that manage to crack up every single adult around them.
Recently, a Reddit user turnturnburn asked fellow members to share the best toddler complaints they've ever heard. And as always, the people of Reddit delivered. With that being said, Bored Panda invites you to sit back, relax, and read some of the funniest yet absolutely adorable stories about little kids complaining about the most random things. Don't forget to vote for your favorite ones, and share your own stories down in the comment section!
More info: Reddit
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#1
After a couple slices of pizza, 3 year old bursts into tears and says: "My mouth wants more but my tummy doesn't!" Me too, kid. Me too.
Ann McNeil 4 years ago
4 year old when asked if she wants a bit more dinner-- "No more to eat, mom- my mouth's too wonderful!"
RELATED:
#2
Demanded to know how to say “Hola in Spanish” would not accept that hola was already Spanish, cried for hours
chiizkake 4 years ago
Aah. First toddler? Just change the vowels around. "It's 'Hulu' love! Just say 'Hulu, nice to meet you,' OK?" Yes they'll suddenly realize when they're 13 and in Spanish class that you lied their entire life, but at least you saved that one afternoon. It will have been worth it.
Gemma Joubert 4 years ago
I did something similar as a kid. Got very upset when my mother wouldn't tell me what my name in a mother language was. Not sure how I remember that haha
Anita Pickle 4 years ago (edited)
Lol I talked to a kid who wanted to know how a dog barked and how a cat meowed in spanish... They did not understand that they sound the same. Too cute.
Nymphadora Tonks 4 years ago
Here it is: Hello. It's really complicated if your not Brittish. Don't worry if you can't do it the first time, not many can.
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#3
Toddler & I are in the truck for a 3-hour, mostly freeway trip. Toddler asks if she can have her window down. Begs. Says pretty please. Whines that she NEEDS the window down. Answer is no... we're going 70 mph for the next few hours. Thus begins the wailing! She cries, and cries... and cries. The window's not going down, I'm tuning her out, no problem, the music is on, I'm just driving and life is good. After probably 45 minutes of this, she slows down, gulps a few times, and in a tremulous voice asks, "Mommy, why am I crying?" I laughed so hard I nearly ran off the road. If you don't remember, I'm not telling you, Kid.
TheBookwormPotato 4 years ago
“I don’t know kid” “But I neeeeeeeeed to know!!!” And another tantrum ensues
Kari Panda 4 years ago
Hats of to the mother for staying strong and keeping her calm! And her humor, apparently :)
Karen Lyon 4 years ago
Oh dear. I gotta say, I had a nephew who was like this -- for a few years past toddlerhood, too.
#4
My toddler got mad that her poop came out in two pieces instead of one. She accused my husband of cutting it while she wasn't looking.
Debrina Blackmoon 4 years ago (edited)
IKR?! Sneaky, poop-cutting bad Daddy!
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#5
5yo: "You're old!". Me: "I'm not that old (with a slight tone of indignation). How old do you think I am?". 5yo: "The last number."
Luna 4 years ago
My niece thinks 100 is the biggest number ever... even bigger than a million...
Anita Pickle 4 years ago (edited)
"You were born in the 19's!" Is still my favourite I heard from a kid.
#6
My daughter had a complete existential breakdown one day when she found out that she was going to have to pee every day of her life
Doggo Froggo 4 years ago
I had that when I realised I would have to swallow every few minutes for the rest of my life.....
Hi I’m Me 4 years ago
One time when I was 2 I ate a guinea pig poop because I thought it was a chocolate chip. When I discovered(on myself) that I swallowed I thought I was the only person who did that and I got some sort of side effect from eating the poop
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Lauren Caswell 4 years ago
Lol! My son was devastated when he found out pooping is a lifelong chore. While reassuring him I mentioned that everyone does, the prime minister, celebrities, even the queen of England. His eyes widened, he was fascinated by the fact the queen poops. She's the gold standard apparently :D
Philly Bob Squires 4 years ago
Wait until you're old and have to make that decision to roll over and sleep harder because you're absolutely beat while your bladder says "GET UP NOW OR YOU'LL BE SWIMMING IN YOUR DREAMS!" So a 3 AM trek to the can it is.
CatWoman312 4 years ago
As someone who has a medical condition where an overactive bladder is part of that I feel this on so many levels 😂
Amanda Hunter 4 years ago
Wait till she starts her first job and learns she has to show up every darn day.
#7
IDK if this is too gross, but when my son was 3, he had a tummy bug and came to me crying that his "butt threw up"
Becca Gizmo the Squirrel 4 years ago
This reminds me of my son a few years ago. He was in the backseat and said "I FARTED" and my husband jokingly said "you are a fart". My son got real quiet and a few minutes later he said, with tears in his eyes, something like " but then ill blow out the window". He was about 8. He has a heart of gold. He was thinking my little fart kid was going to blow out the window and I wouldn't have him around anymore.
#8
I was a restaurant server one night when a family came in. Normally, I'm not a fan of kids, but this one girl, like 5 or 6, broke the mold for me. There was a fire in her eyes, but she wasn't unruly. Just... in the moment. I walk up to the table after they finish a seafood platter, and I hear the parents loudly saying something they obviously want me to hear: "No, honey, they don't let you take the lobster shells home." I could feel invisible elbows jabbing me in the ribs with their glances. Before I open my mouth to back up their story, she huffs and says- "Well, can I at least keep the eyeballs?!" And then proceeds to hold up a fork with the lobsters eyes impaled on to the ends of the outside prongs, like a war chieftain with the head of an enemy. Adorable.
EA 4 years ago
Am I the only one disturbed by this? It’s like keeping a souvenir or trophy after killing someone o_O
Just a girl in a crazy world 4 years ago
That kids gonna grow up and conquer something, idk what, but she will conquer it
Amelia Langley 4 years ago
Am i the only one who finds that funny... or do I have a dark soul o_0
#9
When my daughter was three, I told her to stop trying to draw on the dog with crayons. She threw the crayon on the floor, looked me dead in the eye and yelled, "Daddy, you're ruining my life!"
wade winston wilson 4 years ago
i know right no give me jbac my dmn phhone
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M Rattray 4 years ago
I had a white cat growing up. I colored polka dots on her with markers. I got in so much trouble and was scared she was then going to die because the markers may have been toxic...it was the 70's early 80's. I also cut her whiskers once. I'm 45 and still feel guilty for that.
Lord Mysticlaw 4 years ago
I get the "ruining my life" from my daughter quite often. They like that one.
#10
Overheard at a grocery store: mom let her little boy pick out some ice cream. Kid chooses some sort of chocolate banana popsicle and mom says no. Kid starts crying. Mom says "I thought you didn't like bananas." Kid immediately stops crying, says "Oh yeah", and picks something else.
Maya 4 years ago
this sounds like my dog lol. She will beg for goldfish, and then I throw her one, and she licks it, decides she doesn't like it, and begs for more. -_-
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Daniele Ribolla 4 years ago
the bomb fuse is the word "NO"... my mom when I was terrible, was telling me: "go to yr bed right now, and WITHOUT shoes!" and I was starting to cry like a river! :-D
Amanda Hunter 4 years ago
My three-year-old son pointed to a box of tampons in my cart and asked what they were for. I told him they're for ladies who have their period. At the check out he points to another woman's cart and asks loudly " mom does she have her period?"
Marsha Brown 4 years ago
Toddlers' crying can often be like turning on and off a spigot. Water starts flowing and stops just as suddenly.
#11
My kid hates it when I dance (which is understandable, as I'm very white) He was about two, I was holding him, grooving along to something. He looks me in the eye, and goes "Daddy no sing!" "I'm not singing, I'm dancing!" "Daddy don't sing!" "I'm not!" Him, in tears: "Don't sing with your feet!"
Katrina B. 4 years ago
There is a myth that white people can't dance. Which is wholly and completely untrue. Plenty of white people have rhythm, dance, and make music.
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Beth Arriaga 4 years ago
I would rock my daughter to sleep, and I would sing to her. At about a year old, I'm rocking and singing and enjoying my last baby and rocking... when she takes her pacifier out of her mouth and shoves it into mine and says 'shhhhhh'.
Melanie King 4 years ago
OMG my little brother hates it when my sister and i sing, especially if its like the theme song of a TV show, and so whenever we sing along to the theme song of a show he'll tell us "NO you can't sing you're not in the TV" This post just reminded me of that
AyrinCharles 4 years ago
Sorry but why bring race into a cute story? If this had been said about any other race, you'd be called out on it. Mind you, there are plenty of white people who are amazing dancers.
Slime11IsSus 4 years ago
(which is understandable, as I'm very white) EXCUSE ME WHAT THE FRICK
The Chosen One 4 years ago
petition for dancing to be called "singing with your feet" (or simply "foot singing")
#12
My daughter (about 5) threw a wadded up piece of paper at us and ran away. We opened it up and she had written, “can I have a snake?”. Wife yelled “no, you may not” and my daughter then came back almost in tears to ask why not. She said, “I ate all of my dinner so why can’t I have one?” Wife asked what that had to do with snakes at which point we realized she had misspelled “snack”. Also, my son put us in a sort of reverse “timeout” once when he got angry. This consisted of him going into his room and refusing to come out... leaving us in peace and quiet. He essentially played himself.
TheBookwormPotato 4 years ago
I’m assuming your not five though. I have a five year old brother, and he would never ever do this
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Mahayana 4 years ago
When my sister was 5 years old, she woke up in the morning and told my parents that she had a wonderful dream and would like to see it again. Then she was furious at my parents that they didn’t record her dream on the VCR. They should’ve known that she would want to watch it again!
Martha Meyer 4 years ago
Reverse timeout? Have they never heard of pouting? Kids do that all the time.
A Head 4 years ago
My 13 yo son spent several hours a few days ago researching snakes online - care, feeding, habitat, cost, etc. - and talking non-stop to my wife and I about it, clearly wanting to get a snake. He's a smart kid, has a beehive in the backyard, raises and propagates succulents, and I have no doubt that he could take care of a snake. He walked out of the room and my wife turned to me and said: "Just to be clear. There will be no snakes in this house." Cracked me up. She loves wildlife, and if I ever see a snake in the backyard, I get her to come look. But she ain't having one in the house.
Crochet lady 4 years ago
When my son was little he would just say I'm tired, I'm going to bed now. He didn't care if it was still early, if it was still light outside, if his younger twin brothers were still up; when he was tired he went to bed. And we didn't have late bedtimes for them, he just loved his sleep and still does and he's 30. He never had FOMO either.
Katie Johnson 4 years ago (edited)
That's actually a pretty mature thing to do, seems like he knew he needed to calm down and wasnt ready to talk to he was calmer! That's my interpretation anyway lol
Philly Bob Squires 4 years ago
I've been trying to get my wife to send me to my room for the last 30 years...
#13
My 3yo had a meltdown because he wasn't in our 5 year old wedding photos. He said we didn't love him and that's why we didn't even invite him to our wedding.
Just a Snowball 4 years ago
how evil! you didnt invite your not born yet child to your wedding!
embarrassed american 4 years ago
My mom has a pic of me as a baby playing in a dark corner. I used to cry and cry that she could be so men as to let a baby play in the dark alone. She tried explaining that she was there bc she took the pic but I wasn't trying to hear that... I was alone in the pic so obviously I was abandoned!
#14
I watched a friend's kid have a total breakdown because he wanted to have eaten ice cream. The thing was, he HAD ice cream. It was his dessert, and it was in a bowl in front of him. He could eat it. But the fact that he had to go through the mechanical motions of eating, to get the later point in time where he had had ice cream, was really just too much for him to bear. Watching tiny humans grapple with cause and effect is fascinating.
Easily Excitable Panda 4 years ago
I'm (allegedly) a grown adult, and sometimes I just want to put my face down into a bowl of ice cream and just lick. It's a LOT easier.
Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
"I don't want to eat ice cream, I want to have eaten ice cream without going through the whole process of eating ic cream, it is clear!"
von Funnyname 4 years ago
My almost-four-year-old nephew is doing this now, haha. We were all sitting down having pizza at the in-laws house and he started crying that "basically, whenever I try to eat pizza, I don't like eating pizza". We assumed that meant he decided he didn't like pizza today. Then he went to eat it and stared at it, indignant that it wasn't just force-jumping into his mouth. "I don't want to have to EAT it, I just WANT it"
Debrina Blackmoon 4 years ago
Well, you know you're supposed to buy the magical force-jumping pizza...GEEZ!
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Fidgets McGee 4 years ago
I feel this exact way when I am sitting in front of tax forms. Kid, I'll trade...
#15
My legs are sparkling! Edit: my legs had fallen asleep
Lily 4 years ago
i had a friend who had never had her legs fall asleep before (when we were both 4 or 5) and she yelled DADDY THERE'S BEES IN MY LEGSSS
Cecilia 4 years ago
My niece said her foot is carbonated when it fell asleep
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Myth illogical 4 years ago
My daughter couldn't remember the words 'pins and needles' (which is what British people call that feeling when the blood rushes back after you've cut off your circulation) and used to call it 'sequins and noodles'. She also used to call the game noughts and crosses 'nuts and crackers'.
Philly Bob Squires 4 years ago
My kid once told me that sparkling water tasted like "TV Static..."
Carol Emory 4 years ago
My husband used to twirl our son around in the office chair. Then when he stopped, my son would wobble his head and say "I'm busy, I'm busy."
#16
Now that I’ve been working at home (I have a desk set up in my bedroom) whenever I give my 3 year old grief he tells me to go back to work.
Owl 4 years ago
I'm the boss boss baby boss boss boss baby boss boss. Watch an itty-bitty kid git lage. I'm the big boss baby in charge. strolla rollin up and down the boulevard, I'm the big boss baby in charge. I run this house I rule this crib Change my diaper son where's my bib! Haha that is the Boss baby back in business intro.
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Celtic Pirate Queen 4 years ago
My husband has a home office as well. When he pisses me off, I tell him to "Go to your room"!
#17
When I was about 5 my parents gave me ice cream with chocolate sauce and I broke down crying. Took them a while to figure I was upset at the psycho sick bastard who'd put gravy on my ice cream. Eventually they convinced me to try some and I enjoyed it.
TheBookwormPotato 4 years ago
I mean, I would be pretty mad too if I thought someone was putting gravy on my ice cream
John Montgomery 4 years ago
Isn't that an exact skit on the Carol Burnett Show? I think in that case it was mashed potatoes in an ice cream cone.
Load More Replies... Carol Emory 4 years ago
I once watched a child at Target sipping on a Icee frozen drink. He'd sip wildly until he got brain freeze. Cry for a few seconds, then go back to wildly sipping until the next one hit. Cry again...it was a never ending cycle.
#18
My aunt and younger cousin were visiting us once. He was 3 years old at the time, and my neighbors had a 3 y/o as well. They were playing together in my backyard, when I hear my cousin scream "no, I'M 3! You CAN'T be 3, I'M THREE" while tackling the other child.
Irene McIver 4 years ago
I got pissed off when I first realised that when I got older, my sister would still be older than me.
Phoenix 4 years ago (edited)
Sounds like my brothers. My oldest brother,(5) likes the color blue, if anyone dares to say that they like blue he will immediately go crazy about how blue is HIS favorite color. The only person I’ve seen him except to liking the color blue is his friend Avery that moved two months ago. Every time he says he likes blue he’ll add, “Avery likes blue too”
Joyce Plaate 4 years ago
My nephew Matt was about 4 and he had a younger cousin who was called Justin. Then one day at the beach there was a mother next to us with her 2 year old child, and she was talking to him and calling him Justin, which of course was the kid's name. When he heard the name, Matt looked up from his play, looked at the little boy, looked at the mother, lookes back at the boy, then stood up, walked over to the mother and, while pointing his finger at the little one, told the mother in a very stern way: "THAT IS NOT JUSTIN!"
white_shadow 4 years ago
MY God I DID THIS ONCE!! i was arguing with a kid about this, then I said, "you can be three I'm four"
#19
I worked at a preschool from this October to December as an assistant teacher. We had a play room next to the classroom and one day we decided to go in there to play. In there was a shelf with a lot of dinosaurs to choose from. A child came up to me and said he wanted to play with the dinos. I said “okay”. This child just sat on the floor and looked like he was having the crisis of his life. Then began to cry and when I asked him what was wrong, he said “there’s too many dinosaurs to choose from”
M O'Connell 4 years ago
This is why I hate clothes-shopping. I prefer the thrift store, where there are exactly three things in my size: the really ugly one, the one with the broken zipper, and the one I'll be wearing tomorrow.
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Lion's Stare 4 years ago
This is very common. It has in fact been researched. Humans are overwhelmed by choice when we have more than 5-6 options. It is why it takes adults forever to choose a movie to watch on Netflix. TraderJoes bases their product placement and marketing on this concept, largely limiting similar options on their shelves, and sales went up considerably
#20
When my nephew was three or four, I found a cookie that he had stashed in a couch cushion. It was dry and gross and obviously had been there for a while. I immediately went and tossed it in the trash. My nephew saw this happen and immediately burst into tears. Full-on snotting, hysterical tears. Through his sobs he managed to choke out the words, "you don't throw away cookies." My husband and I use this saying often.
Karen Lyon 4 years ago (edited)
A friend of mine had her oldest when she was a senior in high school, never married the father. When she was dating her first husband, she'd visit his parents often, always with her son, then about two years old. Her little guy also loved the visits, but no one could figure out why he'd always run to the couch in the living room as soon he got in the house. At some point the husband's parents moved somewhere else, and when it came time to move the couch, they removed the cushions to make it lighter. And then found a whole boatload of some kind of cookie that was always the little guy's treat. Every visit he got cookie for each hand. One of which he always stashed in the couch for the next time he came over. None of the adults ever knew!
#21
My nephew had a breakdown and cried when his boot wouldnt fit on his head like a hat.
TheBookwormPotato 4 years ago
What put your rain boot on your head or have a breakdown and cry
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Just a Snowball 4 years ago
i have no idea what i would do if my boot didnt fit on my head
Load More Replies... Polly Culberson 4 years ago
My aunt was washing my hair and I told her, "If my mother was doing this right now, I'd be crying". Four years old.
#22
My wife woke the kids up and told them it was Monday so they needed to get ready for school. "Don't like Monday... Hate Monday... YOU'RE MONDAY! (Directed at wife)" Edit: This was from a 4 year old.
Theoretical Empiricist 4 years ago (edited)
Great name for a "villain" pro wrestler: "I'm more than bad, I'm MONDAY!!"
#23
A kid asked for an envelope. So I gave her one. She started screaming and crying “I want an envelope!!!” She meant cantaloupe.
Marsha Brown 4 years ago
Easy to make that mistake: three syllables, two sound identical. Apparently, you needed to brush up on your Toddler language skills -- harder than most foreign languages, granted, but worth the effort.
meow point1 4 years ago
Reminds me of the Arthur episode where Binky pretends to have asthma, but says, "plasma" instead.
Elizabeth Tunney 4 years ago
I can’t have cantaloupe. In my bloodline.. we get issues with cantaloupe. Not allergies.. so I don’t think I’ll ever have this experience and now I am saddened to hear this
#24
When my little sister was a toddler she screamed she couldn’t go to sleep because her pajamas were “too spicy”
Tim Douglass 4 years ago
Some of these, when you look beyond the surface, may have some interesting significance. "Too spicy" may mean prickly or scratchy, so it may be a complaint about the texture of the fabric. It may also be a result of an allergic reaction to the laundry detergent, and wearing the pajamas might make her legs itch. We have an autistic son who has gone through all of these issues with detergents and it took some pretty careful listening to figure it out. When your 7 year old prefers to go around the house naked, even if it's a bit cold, there is very likely a reason.
Rosemary Hazelton 4 years ago
I just did a double take on this. My daughter says this! She's three. A pillowcase was too spicy for her once, then a cardigan. Now we say it too.
Mishka Katira 4 years ago
my little sister did the same. She said " but mommy, the walls are too pink!" we had just repainted her bedroom the other day
Load More Replies... Debra Robinson 4 years ago (edited)
Special-edition Wasabi or Sriracha pjs, maybe.
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#25
My boy cried when, after stuffing his sandwich in the VHS recorder (early 90s), there was no movie about sandwiches.
Sista of the moon 4 years ago
What about a slice of turkey? Or a bug? Something HAS to work
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Tobias the Tiger 4 years ago
This reminds me of when I nearly put a paper DVD for a nonexistent movie called "The Bunny and the Frog" in the DVD player.
Carol Emory 4 years ago
My sisters friend had a two year old daughter. One day, the friend discovers that the VCR is full of coins. Turns out they were retrieved from a coin bank shaped like a Coca Cola bottle that was 3 feet high with a narrow opening. Her nephews had been over earlier in the day. But some how, they thought they could convince her that a short 2-year old has the height and hand-eye coordination to pull off this little feat.
Lucy Shupe 4 years ago
Can beat that my three year old grandson had watched his parents put a disk into the front of their computer. He decided that’s where his peanut butter sandwich belonged. Wouldn’t have been to bad but both were college students at the time and needed the computer. When my daughter asked him why, he said I just wanted to see what would happen. This also is the same kid who came running down the stairs from his bedroom and in a very LOUD voice proclaimed his penis hurt. His aunts were there me and my husband, daughter embarrassed, the rest of us dying of laughter. He’s 23 now love reminding him of that.
Philly Bob Squires 4 years ago
My then 5 year old daughter once put a tuna sandwich in the VHS machine... because it fit.
#26
Asked if she could have one piece of candy, and I said yes. She then asked, "can we compromise?" and I replied that we didn't need to compromise because she was already getting exactly what she wanted. Child proceeds to throw a tantrum until I agree that we can compromise. She eats her candy and leaves happily
Jessica Nametz 4 years ago
My daughter has learned to ask for, "just one," (with her adorable little toddler finger in the air), but she asks everyone she sees. So if we all give in (it took a little time, but now we are privy to her game...) she ends up with 3+ of whatever she asked for...
Bonnie Edwards 4 years ago
Kinda like how my little sister was convinced that you get change *every time* you buy something.
Laura Odelius 4 years ago
OK, I once cried at a store because they didn’t give me change. My mom finally had to give them a dollar so they could give me 4 quarters back.
Al Christensen 4 years ago
Yes, child, as a general rule of social interaction, we can compromise.
"Simo Häyhä" 4 years ago
"Sure, you stay quiet for the day and you can have the candy. Compromise."
Load More Replies... #27
My 6 year old yelled "I'm too tired to go to sleep!", in a fit of delirium and rage.
Dirk Daring 4 years ago
If I go too long without eating, I get sick to my stomach, and feel like I can't eat.
#28
My little sister, laying on her back, staring straight into the lamps: "My eyes hurt!" "Then stop staring at the lamp." "No!"
Irene McIver 4 years ago
I took my clothes off in the garden to sunbathe in the snow, then asked my sister to go inside and fetch me a blanket because I was cold.
#29
I yawned with my mouth really wide and my little sister told my mum i was trying to eat her
Owl 4 years ago
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE GRAMMA HELP MAMMA TRYING TO EAAAAAAAAAAAAAT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Monic Krugell 4 years ago
this sounds like my sons. Everything the one does is seen as an attack on the other... Hopefully they will get along as adults
Sawyer Kidder31148 4 years ago
You probably were trying to eat her and you just prefer the story that way. You never know....
#30
I once asked a one year old to share her snack with me (common psych experiment, you give them the snacks first). Instead of using the prop, she walked across the lab to her mom and started to pull her moms shirt down to share her boob.
Francesca Annoni 4 years ago
My son is 1,5 years old.. one month ago I stopped breastfeeding him, when I put him to sleep sometime he still asks me "boobies" "Mommy..boobie.." "My love, no more boobie..finished!" "Mommy..boobie please .." "Honey , I can't..there is no milk.." Pointing to the kitchen "fridge?" Very pragmatic 😂
Mishka Katira 4 years ago
my words went on vacation. Oh, their back now: I snorted, laughed so hard my sister is staring at me right now, choked on my mango tea and cherry pie, and proceeded to fall of my chair
#31
My kids used to complain when I couldn't change the weather. "No, we can't go to the park, it's pouring." "Mom, just make it stop raining." Little kids really do think their parents can do anything, apparently.
EA 4 years ago (edited)
Well damn Jackie I can’t control the weatherhttps://i.pinimg.com...7aa68a67546.gif
Lauren Caswell 4 years ago
Yep. Pure disappointment in his eyes when I couldn't turn the wind and rain down. I guess up until a point they assume parents run the world :)
Lindsey Judd-Bruder 4 years ago
I used to ask my mom to call the cable company and tell the to put Popeye on our TV lol.
Caroline Overill 4 years ago
My cat thinks that way. The looks she gives me when she finds it's still raining after three minutes and I haven't turned it off yet.
Lynn Morello 4 years ago
The trees were crying cos they wanted a drink of water. The daisies were crying because they wanted to swim with the frogs. That is why it is raining
#32
"This gravity is too sticky"
Noemie Houtekie-N'Da 4 years ago
Ikr? Like the moon's is so chill. Why can't Earth be the same? Earth's gravity is such a control freak, it just sticks you to everything ugh!
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#33
One of my kids got sick and said "my butt made the wrong kind of poo"
Theoretical Empiricist 4 years ago
How awful that that child shamed that poo for being "the wrong kind of poo"!! How do you think that poo feels about being called "the wrong kind"?!
Sara Mccracken 4 years ago
Actually a very clever description for someone who had diarrhea. I wish most patients could accurately describe their problems like this.
honey_milktea 2 years ago
This kinda reminds of a story my friend told me about how she discovered her butt crack: when she was four she realized and said "Mom! my butts broken!" and insisted on going to the hospital.
NinjaWolfy94 4 years ago
How? It's probably just diarrhea or something. They may have never had it before.
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#34
I specifically remember the moment I realized I had to breathe for the rest of my life. I was suuuuuuper bummed. That's how inherently lazy I am. I was somewhere around 3 or 4.
Rohan Ambastha 4 years ago
My disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined
Load More Replies... Elizabeth Tunney 4 years ago
I didn’t know I blinked automatically and...somehow though I lived 7 years without blinking...after I found out blinking existed....
Glenda Pliler 4 years ago
I had this same experience when I was around 2 1/2, but I was really sick with measles, so I have to think I was really sick.
Helen Haley 4 years ago
I was fine with breathing, but I've always thought eating is just too much effort.
Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
You can breath naturally without even noticing it... unless you think about it, then you cannot unfocus about it ever again for a long time, and it is very annoying. I'm sure it is the same for you right now...
#35
My daughter once said 'I don't like it when you talk'. Noted.
Maripat Webber 4 years ago
That’s ok. I had a seventh grader tell me he really didn’t like listening to people talk. I was his teacher.
Karen Lyon 4 years ago
She's probably about 5, maybe a late four, she sounds like the kiddos that I teach. "Littles" that age are starting to feel very independent and grown up.....and they are not always convinced that adults know what they are doing.
#36
The 3-year-old found a mitten on the ground and put it on. He asked where the other one was and I said I didn't know. He looked down and said, like it was a unique problem, "But I have TWO hands!"
Phoenix 4 years ago
I want to upvote, but at the same time I don’t because you got 2 upvotes....
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The Chosen One 4 years ago
ok why are you letting your 3yo put on random mittens from the ground that's not safe or sanitary you don't know where that came from or where its been?
#37
Mom, this fish makes my ears sour.
TenkoChabashira 4 years ago
This might just be me but when you eat some things this part under my ear feels kinda... sour?
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#38
My 4 year old brother told me "My water is too soupy" I still haven't quite figured it out.
M O'Connell 4 years ago
He would have preferred it to be scalloped. Or perhaps julienned.
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Henry Cheves 4 years ago
I think either it had a yucky taste or it was lumpy. Either way, get your kid some new water.
JustYou'reAveragePANda 1 year ago
I read that "My soup is too watery" bc thats what my brother says.
#39
My dad always reminded me of when I was very little, I use to complain that I didn't like the 'Pizza Bone' (crust). I would also refuse to eat 'corn with the bone' (corn on the cob). I like both of them now! I wish I knew what I was thinking back then.
M O'Connell 4 years ago
I prefer my corn bone-in. The boneless corn just doesn't have enough flavor.
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#40
My 2 year old puts her hand in front of the dog's mouth and cries when he licks her.
#41
My youngest got upset that the sun was setting and demanded his father make it rise back up in the sky.
Ella Greenman 4 years ago
I took "Child of God' too literaly and said "DAD MAKE ME A HORSEY" Dad was confused I said 'No my REAL dad'. Oooof
Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
In the middle east, around 2000 years ago, there was another child whose father could do that too.
#42
Cousin's 3yo: (offers a Goldfish to my BIL) BIL: No, thank you! 3: (offers another Goldfish) BIL: No, no thank you! 3: (offers another Goldfish) BIL: No thank you, buddy! 3: GRANDMA, [BIL] WON'T SHARE! Sharing is mandatory in both directions, I guess.
#43
Pointing to my boobs, crying, and asking why I can’t feed him. Because I’m your BABYSITTER and I’m 15! EDIT- he didn’t say “why can’t you feed me” but he was using his word for “food” and refused his bottle.
Dark_flame 4 years ago
My nephew as a baby would try to pick out ones boob from bra/shirt regardless of who you were as long as you had boobs. He even tried on my older brother (his uncle) 🤣 my brother were a bit on the heavy side, so there was some manboob to grab
Ella Greenman 4 years ago
My mom says little boys have crushes on the teen girl babysitters. If so im out yall
#44
When my niece was 3, her favorite website was Barbie.com. I was over at my brother's house one day and she asked me to "turn on" Barbie.com so she could play on it. The site was taking a bit of time to upload so I decided to take a quick look at my email messages until it was finished. My niece looked at the Gmail account I was on and said, "Auntie, I said Barbie dot com, not check my email dot com."
Someone 4 years ago
Well she is a 3 year old so I bet she does not really know her manners yet.
Load More Replies... #45
My daughter asked for strawberry ice cream from the grocery store when she was about 4. I bought it for her and when we got home and she had some after dinner, she started crying. I asked why and she said, “I wanted strawberry ice cream without bones!” She didn’t like the hard frozen pieces of strawberry in the ice cream that she picked out. I thought the idea of “ice cream bones” was funny.
DDmaybeandor 4 years ago
I used to throw a tantrum apparently if the strawberry ice cream didn't have those "bones", to the point that food service workers were warned not to even mention it if it didn't have real strawberries in my specific scoop.
#46
My niece recently was upset about being served food in the little bowl, and not the big bowl. When her food was the moved from the little bowl to a big bowl for her, she had a melt down. After a fair amount of crying she was able to explain she didn't want the food from the little bowl placed into the big bowl. I suppose once in the little bowl the food was forever tainted.
Bettie-Jean Neal 4 years ago
Reason #14 why I never had children. I don't have time for any of this nonsense.
#47
Lol my little brother (when he was 4yo) liked ice-cream so much so that whenever he got one he'd be so delighted to eat it but when he'd be about to finish it he'd begin sobbing that he didn't want to finish it as he'd have none left then!
Nicola Roberts 4 years ago
I can't quite place the kid, (maybe a nephew) that would ball his eyes out because he knew that the "Thomas the Tank" video was coming to an end. I would say why don't you just play it again for him? The response was that they did.... I wonder if that kid still has that much drama in his life?
#48
My daughter wanted to drink pure lemon juice and threw a fit when she was denied. I caved on the premise of natural consequences. One sip and she vomited. She never bugged us about it again.
Lady Snowfall 4 years ago
We tried that, it didn't work. Our daughter liked it so much, she would sneak it by the spoonful. When we went to use the lemon juice, the bottle was empty 😅
#49
The place settings were fork, spoon, knife on a napkin for a holiday dinner. We started with soup. My 3 yr old cried because she thought she had to eat her soup with a fork because it was first in line.
Shelby P 4 years ago
so you're saying a 3 year knows utensil etiquette? or was it just a coincidence...
#51
Ice cream is too cold.
Jen Koscheka 4 years ago
Amen to this prodigy!! I’d don’t eat ice cream to this day because of this!
#52
My 4 year old son had a full blown, hour long meltdown because his 6 year old sister was older than him.
Irene McIver 4 years ago
I got pissed off when I realised that my sister was getting older at the same rate I was and I couldn't catch up or overtake her age.
Eva Schmutz 4 years ago
I have step brother We are the same exact age but I am 2 weeks older and he doesn't admit I am older and I am older we are both 13 I have a second step brother who is 17 and a little brother who is 11 and a baby brother who is 1 an a half
ILOVEBAMBOO 4 years ago
My brother is six and I'm 8. I'm a lot smarter than you think for an eight year old...in fact i'm about the smartest person in my class. I don't have any other siblings.
Charlotte Carpenter 4 years ago
my little brother (4) complains that im 11 alllllll the time lol
#53
My 2-year-old broke down because it was dinnertime, not lunchtime. Bonus: she crawled into my bed at 4 am Christmas morning, crying that she wanted to color and I needed to get her a pen, then fell asleep on my face.
#54
3 year old Tyler says"Uncle Tony, shave your whiskers!" I say "All of it?" He says "No, only the white ones".
#55
“The orange part of your feet (calloused heels) is making my macaroni taste bad.”
Ella Greenman 4 years ago (edited)
Oh ofc let me pull a "Cinderella stepsister' real quick EDIT- In original cinderella a stepsister cut off her heal to make her foot fit in the shoe
hi myself 4 years ago
Now with that in my head I will never be watching Cinderella again. Rather SINderella. And I don't think when the original was made that there were such things as pain killers... Sorry if this is too dark.
Load More Replies... #56
"it's the wrong same!" took weeks to figure out he was referring to the apricot and peach yogurts.
#57
My 3 year old complained that his Strawberries were "too crunchy"
#58
Wanting to put a diaper on for bed, not wanting to take the underwear off to put the diaper on.
Linouchka 99 4 years ago
You still have to take the underwear off to put the diaper on the butt ! !!
Load More Replies... #59
My 4 year old is super into the following exchange: 4 yr old: I don’t want X!!! Me: Okay. Don’t have X. 4 yr old: BUT I WANT X. This morning the 6 year old woke up and said to them, “C’mon! We’re gonna Kung Fu!” “I don’t wanna Kung Fu!” “Okay, we’ll—“ “NOOO! I wanna Kung Fu!”
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What do you think ?
Nerdy 4 years ago
Haha I love these kids are great most of the time! Me and my sister got in a HUGE fight over invisible brownie's.
Phoenix 4 years ago
Kids are clowns, devils, angels, the reason parents grow gray hair, all in one.
Karen Lyon 4 years ago (edited)
Oh, yeah. I am a few years away from retirement, after 32 years in education, at all kinds of grade levels, in all kinds of settings. Most of my career, though, has been in the primary grades. The last 6 years I have been teaching Transitional Kindergarten, which in California is an extra year working on kindergarten skills for little ones who turn 5 in the late fall. I absolutely love it, even with distance learning. But it takes a lot of energy and patience to be around them 6 hours a day -- or even ten minutes on Google Meet! I'm always saying that my "littles" wear me out and keep me young all at the same time.
Load More Replies... Melanie King 4 years ago
OOF reminds me of a conversation i was having with my 3-year-old brother yesterday, i was explaining that he couldnt have a certain type of candy because he could easily choke on it, and he was crying, and then a tear ran down my cheek because thats a hard conversation to have but anyways then he looked at me, said "Why are YOU crying?!?!?!?!" And then procceded to wail even louder, which he later said was because i was crying and he had to cry louder.
Lay Bets 4 years ago
I had my hair cut really short once and as I’ve always had long hair, was feeling a little insecure. I asked my two year old if he liked my hair. He stopped what he was doing, put his tiny little hands on either side of my face, leaned forward and said, “I don’t like your hair mummy, I love your face.”
Marcia Cash 4 years ago
My little daughter refused to try broccoli unless I let her "eat like a puppy dog". So she put her plate on the floor, got down on hands and knees, and picked it up with her mouth. Wow! Now it's her favourite veggie. Smart me for not enforcing table manners on a 4 year old.
Lady Snowfall 4 years ago
When my oldest was in kindergarten, she came home from school mad that the lunch person put "dirty water" on her mashed potatoes at lunch. Took us a minute to figure out she was talking about gravy 🤣
Jessica Nametz 4 years ago
My daughter is constantly making my husband and I laugh. The other day we were attempting to leave her with grandma so we could hit some yard sales. She started having a total meltdown until my husband said, "we have to go so we can buy you a present". She immediately stopped crying and said, "Oh, yeah. Bye." 😂😂😂
Nerdy 4 years ago
Haha I love these kids are great most of the time! Me and my sister got in a HUGE fight over invisible brownie's.
Phoenix 4 years ago
Kids are clowns, devils, angels, the reason parents grow gray hair, all in one.
Karen Lyon 4 years ago (edited)
Oh, yeah. I am a few years away from retirement, after 32 years in education, at all kinds of grade levels, in all kinds of settings. Most of my career, though, has been in the primary grades. The last 6 years I have been teaching Transitional Kindergarten, which in California is an extra year working on kindergarten skills for little ones who turn 5 in the late fall. I absolutely love it, even with distance learning. But it takes a lot of energy and patience to be around them 6 hours a day -- or even ten minutes on Google Meet! I'm always saying that my "littles" wear me out and keep me young all at the same time.
Load More Replies... Melanie King 4 years ago
OOF reminds me of a conversation i was having with my 3-year-old brother yesterday, i was explaining that he couldnt have a certain type of candy because he could easily choke on it, and he was crying, and then a tear ran down my cheek because thats a hard conversation to have but anyways then he looked at me, said "Why are YOU crying?!?!?!?!" And then procceded to wail even louder, which he later said was because i was crying and he had to cry louder.
Lay Bets 4 years ago
I had my hair cut really short once and as I’ve always had long hair, was feeling a little insecure. I asked my two year old if he liked my hair. He stopped what he was doing, put his tiny little hands on either side of my face, leaned forward and said, “I don’t like your hair mummy, I love your face.”
Marcia Cash 4 years ago
My little daughter refused to try broccoli unless I let her "eat like a puppy dog". So she put her plate on the floor, got down on hands and knees, and picked it up with her mouth. Wow! Now it's her favourite veggie. Smart me for not enforcing table manners on a 4 year old.
Lady Snowfall 4 years ago
When my oldest was in kindergarten, she came home from school mad that the lunch person put "dirty water" on her mashed potatoes at lunch. Took us a minute to figure out she was talking about gravy 🤣
Jessica Nametz 4 years ago
My daughter is constantly making my husband and I laugh. The other day we were attempting to leave her with grandma so we could hit some yard sales. She started having a total meltdown until my husband said, "we have to go so we can buy you a present". She immediately stopped crying and said, "Oh, yeah. Bye." 😂😂😂
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