The fact that they didn't hesitate speaks volumes about your parenting skills. I am seriously impressed by that! 👏 Brava, brava!

They know us too well...

🤣🤣🤣

You did pass. It's okay to forget

LOL

Daaannng...

You have kept her alive for 14 years. She should buy you the ice cream

Wait till you have triplets

Checks bedroom for velociraptor

Mines 29 & STILL does it! 🙄

Nice come back!

Sorcery.

You never know...

They'll get there... one day

Obviously! 🍰🎂🧁

One of those old souls eh?

Schools do start too early for teens. When I was one I couldn't fall asleep before 2am, it was a horrific waking nightmare to drag my sorry a ss to school each weekday

ROTFLMAO 😄

So no ballooning?

Where do they come up with this stuff!?!

Yes, poop is processed chocolate

Everybody has to be good at something.

Your 8 year old is a genius *takes notes*

These are not my kids.

I can see that.

Savage 😄

We literally had to hide the little chocolate bunnies from my 2.5yo grandson. Not because he was eating them, but because he was playing with them. Once he figured it out, he started hiding them - in the tub , his bed, the toy box, my shoes....

Life lesson number one, people.

And he roars like one when you try to wake him up! 🦖

Those puppets looked weird.

I must’ve had a terrible imagination as a child. I never had an imaginary friend. And I tried lol

I once laid beside my son in the cereal aisle at the grocery store and proceeded to yell louder than him. He stopped and stared at me. I've had YEARS more practice!

One of my favourite quotes: "Cleaning house while kids are growing, Is like shovelling snow when it's still snowing"

What would happen if you squash a glitter bomb? Would it blow up? Because I doubt that's something I would wanna clean up.

Stairs are awesome! Go stairs! 🥳🥳🥳

Harsh, but you respected her wishes. (Did she drink it?)

I mean, he's not wrong if you're withholding Reeses! Pretty sure that's considered abuse!!!

We went on a family vacation when I was in 1st grade. Somewhere in the middle of Montana, I said mommy, I don't feel so good and I have a lot of red spots on me. I developed 3 day measles on the way to Yellowstone.

An art critic in the making... and a good one!

Ngl, that soap would be trashed 🗑

Miss 9 & I call each other bruh daily!! Even at school drop off & pick up, she'd say 'bye bruh' , 'hi bruh' it makes us feel connected more. My mum would punish us kids when we use to call her bruh. It's harmless!

Calmly explain that's where politicians come from

Oh, gross 😝

African-American Vernacular English is a legitimate, NATIVELY used variety of English and, as such, it has its own grammar, vocabulary, and phonology. It's not "uneducated" and it's not "hood". In fact, it shares its phonology with rural deialects spoken by Whites throughout the Southern United States, and it's closely related to various creole languages. I know it's difficult to believe that if it doesn't "sound" white then it must not be proper, but try your hardest, will ya.

After the shelf above our toilet fell and broke it, I'll admit I did this

Should've said "yes" LOL

I was UncleDude for a few months. I loved that one!

17 has taken up to calling me Man a lot lately. Normally I'm just Jon to her. Stepdad life is fun sometimes.

That happens when they forget your name.

Son only called me bro once. Next time I needed him I said, "hey bro!" He told me that was weird, and he got the point!

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Yes mom, it’s called show me some respect or I will not engage in conversation with you or even acknowledge you.

It's a 6th sense that you develop upon constant use of your phone... no one said it was reliable, but it apparently exists.

At least they didn't tell you that the only reason they wanted you around was to feed them, clean take care of the baby and drive them around (my, then, 7yo).