This one's pretty funny. Waste not, want not ...

That's actually kind of cute.

How do you carry on a conversation with him ? I have so many questions.

my friend is like this and its hilarious

No

Asking all the questions on people who do this is amazing, because they answer. Not sure if always honest or true.

I'm sorry, but as annoying as this must be, I also find it hilarious.

I loved how he finds it endearing instead of annoying.

As someone with high-functioning autism, this sounds like it might be Autism Spectrum Disorder. Many High Functioning Autistic people have trouble with chatting and casual conversation. The fact he has to google topics for conversation hints he might be having trouble with casual social skills and is making an effort to compensate. Likewise, the fact he asks intimate questions in a room full of people suggests he has trouble understanding social propriety and boundaries, another thing difficult for people with autism.

Put him in front of a mirror and tell him that he is cute and a keeper, because he is actually listening to you. My one, I could tell him 200 times how a watch is beautiful and he would still show up on valentines or birthdays with something else but the watch.

What's rizz?

Umm...aren't alarm clocks just a type of timer?

I think this is a healthy self care boundary and not a flag at all.

"Snack budget"? That doesn't sound good.

I think that flag is red, not beige!

Thanks random boyfriend!

Girlfriend's version of zoomies!

I am waving the beige flag. I do this very thing.

In high school, my brother loved convincing people that "gullible" wasn't actually in the dictionary.

If he does it to others, he will do it to you.

I once convinced a girl (not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree) that the reason why her family all have brown eyes and not green is because they don’t eat vegetables. Legit convinced her and she said it made sense, they all lived off baked beans, potato waffles and chicken nuggets almost exclusively. Did tell her the truth eventually but it was hilarious

I sold my teen aged daughter in high school that "The Great Chocolate Revolution" was a real thing. Dates, names, places, all made up. She went into school and asked the teachers why that hadn't been covered...

I had a friend like this. He would convince strangers he chatted to in parking lots that he was 20 years older than he was and had 3 children (he had none). It was harmless but he got a pretty big kick out of it.

Gaslighting is when you bring up an issue with someone and they know that what you're talking about actually happened, but they try to convince you that you're delusional so that they don't have to take any responsibility for their actions.

Yeah, I'm waayyy too good with a deadpan joke delivery. People keep thinking I'm serious and ask if I'm serious. I always have to make sure they know I'm definitely joking.

As long as he doesn't do this with 60million Germans I'm fine with that...

This has nothing to do with gaslighting— this is just being scary good at bullshitting, which can be a legit talent.

Me too. Once convinced a couple of colleagues cuckoos were building a nest in the school garden 😂👍

I do this to people all day long. It's a lot of fun to see just how clueless people are.

I'd watch out if I were you....

My husband liked to make these kind of jokes, and if I'm not paying close attention to the conversation it'll work. He wouldn't be able to keep a straight face long enough to convince anyone who questioned him on it though lol

When I was a kid I would make up rediculous stories. I convinced one person that I used to live in a house with vampires and you could only see them in mirrors... it was early creative development. But it comes back to haunt me sometimes. I was at a funeral and a girl came up to me (total genius, one of the smartest people I've ever met) and asked if I really knew a girl who could grow rocks. Apparently I'd convinced her that this other girl could literally pray rocks larger and once trapped herself inside a circle of rocks she'd grown. For twenty years I had this poor girl unsure if it was true because I was so convincing and had do many small details and never contradicted myself. I did, finally, admit that not a word of it was true.

Well he's very good at it but uses it remember people not to believe everything they get told. So not so bad.

My trust issues couldn't handle that.

Sociopath?

That's a red flag, honey.

This sounds more like a red flag.

I've often said that it's as selfish to refuse to receive as it is to refuse to give, because in refusing to receive we are denying other people the opportunity to be generous and we are refusing to be grateful to other, instead insisting they always be indebted to us. Generosity sometimes means allowing others to be generous too.

100% me. Not hypochondria or attention seeking, my body is just a POS. I either try not to comment on it because I can absolutely see how this would be annoying, or I make it a joke, like, ugh, what's broken on me now?

I friggin hate when people do that! Didn't you read the rest? Is your brain function that limited? Why?!

When my children went through this phase I'd pretend to not know what they wanted until they spoke properly. (And, yes, they were fully able to articulate clearly.)

I don't understand why that would make the waiter embarrassed - he'll either have an actual favorite that he'll recommend, if not then he'll pick something at random from the menu (or something expensive)... or maybe the manager said "hey, we've got too much fish, so push the fish!" and recommend that. Not sure where the discomfort would come from unless the waiter was so unfamiliar with the menu that he couldnt think of a single dish to recommend.

I'm like that and I'm a woman. If they want to say, they will tell me - that's my reasoning.

Maybe he thinks it’s a beige flag that you call yourself a scheduled girly.

i’m like this

This is me, and this is apparently very common in people who have ADHD (not saying she does). I hate having notifications hanging over me, so I open the message, and if I'm in the right mood I'll respond. But sometimes I think "I'll get back to it later" and then totally forget the message ever existed until the next time I think to text that person.

i’m like this. but i don’t have money