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Men Made Fun Of This Woman For Wearing A Bikini, But Instead of Covering Up, She Shut Them Down
13.3K

Men Made Fun Of This Woman For Wearing A Bikini, But Instead of Covering Up, She Shut Them Down

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“Let’s change societies view that beauty isn’t in our appearance and remind the world that it comes from within!” writes Shelly Proebstel on her Facebook page Bald and Beautiful. Sure, there are many inspirational people out there, leading the fight against a false and unhealthy body image promoted by airbrushing and photoshopping media and fashion outlets, but few are as eloquently blunt as Shelley. She certainly practices what she preaches!

Image credits: Bald and Beautiful

Because as we all know by now, a ‘bikini body’ is simply that: a body with a bikini on it. Shelley was out enjoying the sun at Mt Maunganui Beach, a lovely spot near Tauranga on the north island of New Zealand. Suddenly, she noticed the jeers and sniggers of some men nearby. Refusing to be shamed by the incident, she instead decided to turn it around by penning a powerful response about body positivity.

Image credits: Bald and Beautiful

“To the guys who pointed and laughed when I took my sarong off today at Mt Maunganui Beach, bearing my soul (my bikini body) to the world, I just want to say (excuse my language but) F*CK YOU,” she wrote on an emotional post that now has over 60k likes and shares.

Image credits: Bald and Beautiful

“It’s because of dickheads like you that people are so incredibly insecure about their body image.”

“It’s because of people like you that women especially don’t feel safe or confident or comfortable to go out in society in something like a bikini, or a crop top (they probably aren’t even called that anymore!) or a short dress, or with their midriff showing. ”

Image credits: Bald and Beautiful

“It’s because of people like you that people starve themselves and make themselves sick in an attempt to maintain a ‘model-like figure’.”

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“It’s because of people like you that people wear long sleeves all year round because they are scared to show their arms.”

Image credits: Bald and Beautiful

“It’s because people like you that people become anorexic, obese, bulimic, self-harm, commit suicide…I could go on… No, you are not responsible for the entirety. But YES, you have to take some responsibility.”

“So next time you see someone like me on the beach in a bikini or in a situation similar, before you laugh and point, take a moment to think about the damage you may just do, because not every person, young or old, male or female, will have learned to have the thick skin, or the resilience, or the self-confidence, that I do to brush it off.”

Image credits: Bald and Beautiful

“I won’t lie, there was a split second that I almost quickly covered up again, and then I reminded myself of all I have learned on this journey, and I held my head high and stuck my belly out and wore that bikini with pride.”

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“Parents, I urge you to teach your children that there is no one body shape, but instead that there is a rainbow of beautiful bodies. I urge you to teach them not to stare directly at a bigger stomach than they might be accustomed to seeing on tv or in society, but instead, to look at a persons face and into their eyes. I urge you to teach them to be kind to all types of people, regardless of their outer appearance. I urge you to teach your children to accept people for exactly who they are on the inside. And I urge you to teach your children to be role models to those around them who aren’t being taught this, and to be the positive change we need to see in the world, so that in 5 or 10 or 20 years time, no more people are pointed at and laughed at by the way they look when they wear a bikini on the beach.”

People were full of praise and support for Shelley’s heartfelt message

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Ilona Baliūnaitė

Ilona Baliūnaitė

Author, BoredPanda staff

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I'm a Visual Editor at Bored Panda since 2017. I've searched through a multitude of images to create over 2000 diverse posts on a wide range of topics. I love memes, funny, and cute stuff, but I'm also into social issues topics. Despite my background in communication, my heart belongs to visual media, especially photography. When I'm not at my desk, you're likely to find me in the streets with my camera, checking out cool exhibitions, watching a movie at the cinema or just chilling with a coffee in a cozy place

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Ilona Baliūnaitė

Ilona Baliūnaitė

Author, BoredPanda staff

I'm a Visual Editor at Bored Panda since 2017. I've searched through a multitude of images to create over 2000 diverse posts on a wide range of topics. I love memes, funny, and cute stuff, but I'm also into social issues topics. Despite my background in communication, my heart belongs to visual media, especially photography. When I'm not at my desk, you're likely to find me in the streets with my camera, checking out cool exhibitions, watching a movie at the cinema or just chilling with a coffee in a cozy place

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Wil Vanderheijden
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Woman Shuts Down Men Who Fat-Shamed Her At The Beach" . Yeah, In your dreams. Men and women will still belaughing and making jokes about her the next time she comes to the beach wearing a bikini. Sorry to burst your bubble, but this kind of people doesn't give a f*ck about your powerful responses and it won't change their appaling attitude against other people. Now downvote me.

Rafaella Bueno
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

By my experience, it'll actually make it worse. Getting her to write such a passionate response just reaffirms that they definitely had an impact on her... You don't need to reassure yourself if you really didn't care. Unfortunately, talking back to those people just fuels them.

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Biljana Malesevic
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Judging people by looks has always been stupid and it's still stupid. Mind your own business, leave others to enjoy life!

Megan Brady
Community Member
5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I go to the beach, I'm envious of the women like you. Im 28 years old and have never been comfortable enough to wear shorts or a bikini. my husband has started to make a unkind comment before to other women (not directly) but I stop him and say "I wish I had confidence like her" :) I've learned that a body size never defines a level of confidence. Period. You go girl :)

Davorka Banović
Community Member
5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Unless he's really aware why it was wrong - get a better man, someone who doesn't find himself called to invade the private space of others with such comments (and in basis his own sexual preferences which actually may disable him in having a meaningful relationship (not just a romantic one) with decent people because of his prejudice/preference), one who will help you get back the confidence that belongs to you, because I know where you are, I'm there too in some respects but I've gotten really far from where I was and learning to spot wholesome and truly supportive people for my closest circle was also part of that. don't justify his prejudices or handicaps in empathy and understanding by your own insecurity... and sorry if I'm babbling uninvited, my comment is only here for your consideration. I wish you nothing but the best :)

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Stille20
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can't stand when someone mocks and overweight person and the justification is, "well they are unhealthy". Public ridicule is not going to fix the obesity epidemic.. or do you think we should also be free to openly mock those with Opioid addictions too?

Peter Schaeffer
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Public shaming definitely impacts behavior. Note how much smoking has declined since it became socially unacceptable. I hate to say this, but "medicine" (a branch of "science") says that being overweight is bad for your health. Reality is not PC.

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Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you have time to worry about someone else’s fat or diet then you’re just wasting time that you could be worrying about your own exercise. No, not everyone is going to look how you like. That doesn’t mean you have to pay attention or be negative. Most of us could be doing something to look better in one way or another and yet we don’t. So why expect such big things out of bigger people? Please. What’s wrong with people being fat anyway? It only makes you look thinner tbh. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I’m kidding. But still. What kind of loser spends their time crying about SOMEONE ELSE being fat? What a depressing existence. I’d rather be happy about good things in my life than cry about someone looking chunky.

GoodWolf
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a shame that those guys will probably never see this post.

Roman Hans
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I moved from NYC to Berlin two years ago and my favorite thing here is “FKK.” It was a cultural movement in the 1920s saying all bodies are beautiful, bodyshaming is wrong, and the person with the problem is the bodyshamer. Everyone still follows it. As an American I’m still shocked to see totally out of shape, really old people NUDE SWIMMING and even the young people are like, “Isn’t that cool?” Because getting fresh air and exercise is great no matter what you look like. I wish America was as wise!

Sierra Hall
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's not accurate or fair to say that she waits in the line at McDonalds. I have almost the same body as her, except for the legs. My body is a result of a thyroid disorder. Unfortunately, no amount of medication or diet can correct the weight issue that comes with hashimoto's. Hell, I even have the lapband and it hasn't even helped that much. I just don't gain anymore. But saying that, she could have found a better bathing suit. I like to wear two pieces too but I choose ones that compliment my body type (high waist bottoms etc).

Valerie Lessard
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

so being fat and at the beach gives cruel pieces of s**t the right to take photos of random people and laugh at them? i hope much worse happens to them

NoName
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Please don't wish I'll on them :) just know that you have the self awareness to know the difference between being a respectful human being and being a mindless, a*****e bully :)

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Liz Karsa
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yet every day men with huge guts go shirtless. Talk about double standard.

StealTheFruit
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To everyone hear reading this, you are beautiful. Maybe not on the outside yet, but on the inside too. Maybe even both. Don't starve. Don't cut. Don't die. You are not a painting. You are not on display. You don't have to be perfect. You don't have to listen to insults. You are worth it. Keep going. <3

Daniel (ShadowDrakken)
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I want to point out too, for folk that don't get how hard women have it when shopping for clothes, that women's clothing sizes make no damn sense at all. They're inconsistent even within a single brand. They vary from style to style. And one size fits all is a lie. I have a petite plus wife, which means there's not a one-piece swimsuit on the planet that fits her. Which means she's forced to wear a two-piece to be comfortable and protect YOUR sensibilities (ie. Not be popping out all over the place.) She eats right, around 1500kcal, and makes healthy choices; but unfortunately, due to having her gal bladder removed and having EDS which limits her mobility, she has weight control issues. All this culminates to her having limited clothing options. And none of it is her fault. So before you decide to go body shaming people maybe spend a moment considering yourself in that position.

FortnitePlayerGirl
Community Member
5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No trends or perfect images should ever hinder our ideas that we were all made beautifully. Women should be allowed to do what they want without feeling insecure, and it is unnecessary to show bodies that are completely fake in magazines, TV shows, or anywhere in general as if they are perfect and real, because, yes, people do believe that those body types are achievable, and attempt to gain that body type while endangering their health. This woman is strong, and knows this, and we need more people out there that stand their ground in the face of unfair treatment. This woman is a hero, and I hope her confidence continues to inspire others.

NoName
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The energy that radiates from her smile and eyes is infectious :) in a perfect world, we wouldn't need to be reading things like this to validate ourselves. People wouldn't need to go through Hell so others could gain strength from the experience. But she has. And, girl, I'm soaking up your energy <3 thank you for showing that strength and empathy are beautiful in and of themselves <3

crazy_cat_notAlady
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

we are all glorified worm-food anyway. on the one hand we have people "upgrading" their limbs/body parts with bionic appendages and on the other we have specimens trying to measure the world with a tailoring tape. gah. just shut up and let others wear, eat, feel whatever they want to!

TiaMa
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I remember my mom telling me that if someone looks at me funny in my swimsuit, I shall visibly check them out from head to toes with a small pause around the middle and then just grin in contempt to their face while passing them. I might have been around 14.

Aroha
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No matter how healthy I ate or how much I exercised, my stomach never looked flat and "beautiful". I was 12 when I was first told that it is ugly and I would never find a partner. Both became self-fulfilling prophesies. A couple of weeks ago - 24 years later - I found out that I have endometriosis. It causes me to sometimes look pregnant, sometimes like I just ate too much. It won't go away with diet and exercise, because it is a lifelong, painful illness. I have never worn a bathing suit or been to a public beach, and probably never will, because my suffering body would end up as a meme for some self-centered teenagers (either in age or mental capacity) who don't know what it is like to stay up for entire nights as an alien is using a cheese grater to find a way out of your guts.

Carol Emory
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

At least the ones that point and laugh have managed to label themselves as unsuitable husbands. I know men that have divorced wife after wife because her body got, for lack of a better word, more plump after having a kid or two. They always felt like the wives should have kept themselves lean and fit. Meanwhile, these same men do little to help in the raising of the kids or maintaining the house..even when the wife also has a full-time career. They often run off to hang out with friends. Those men have no idea what true love is. It's sad really. I just wish those women could have seen what they were truly like before they wasted their time on them.

Bill
Community Member
5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She should have put the effort into sunscreen. She gets redder every photo that day

Aletia Johnson
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think you’re beautiful just the way you are. You only need two things to wear a bikini - a torso and a pelvis. If you don’t have both of those you’ve got bigger problems than swimwear. I would have punched them and kicked sand in their stoopid faces if they’d said that to me. I’m 42 years old and a size 18 and I don’t even OWN a one piece swimsuit any more. Bikinis are way more comfy!

Amie Redman
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wish I had her confidence. My husband bought me an adorable bikini and I have only worn it once. I wish we could all just not judge one another.

FluffyGaming
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love the inspirational comments! But never would I wear a bikini. I get a “sand wedgie” oh an funny stuff i saw a rather large woman shaming another m (smaller) woman cause she was wearing a bikini like whaaaaat

Chris A
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The fattie shut nothing down. Maybe if she stopped shoving food into her mouth and went for a walk, she would be able to wear a bikini without looking like a pig.

mithril
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, you don't need to starve yourself to lose weight, you just have to stop eating unhealthy c**p.

Margaret Shannon
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Men will always find something to criticize about women. Women will never be pretty enough, or slender enough, or smart enough, or submissive enough. Lots of guys claim to be the exception, but are silent in situations like this. If there really were as many good men as claim to be, the bad men would be ashamed to show themselves.

mac
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You can't say men don't put up with this kind of bs. What about the old dude with a beer belly rockin a speedo? We've all seen them at the beach. And we have all said to ourselves, "My eyes!!!" Difference being most men don't give a F*CK! There are plenty of men who are self conscious about being at the beach. This isn't a women only issue.

John Carr
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What the hell is so wrong with a bit of podge? Or scars? Or a skin ailment? It's all just exterior. Show off the inside person by showing the outside person and to hell with the begrudgers! I'm overweight, have scars from self-harm and covered with horrible psoriasis blotches. I got slagged for wearing shorts on a beach but still keep wearing them and showing off my "imperfections". Keep rocking Shelly!

Monica small
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The funny thing is that these men probably did not have ideal bodies either. I'm thinking beer bellies with toothpick legs.

My dog is my co pilot.
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You go to ANY beach in the world and you will see dozens of men far far bigger than her with their bellies out and wobbling around all over the place and nothing will be said. A woman does it and the internet goes into meltdown. For goodness sake guys GET OVER YOURSELVES AND GET A LIFE. This woman is my new heroine. She is just absolutely beautiful awesome amazing and wonderful in every way.

Slune
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If I imagine how many fat guys with no neck, bold head,hairy backs,barrel sized beer bellies and wretched thin legs. I must say we women are very tolerant!

anisub
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

shutting them down would imply that she confronted them...

Othman Kh
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Judging people by looks has always been stupid and it's still stupid. Mind your own business, leave others to enjoy life

Kerolos Saleib
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I didn't even open the article cause the title in itself made me ill.... First m'en and other women woukd of done that to her, but mostly why not change the title to something more empowering as opposed to subjecting women to men's ideologies.... Like she had to prove a point to men... Who cares about these low life men who sexualité women and are there to touch themselves. Why isn't the camera turned around to show who these mysoginistic men are instead.

Peter Schaeffer
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hate to say this, but "medicine" (a branch of "science") says that being overweight is bad for your health. Reality is not PC.

Debbie Lyn Jones (Deb)
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

Michael Scruggs
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

Rider
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Zaftig is a fancy word for 'makes my mouth water.'" ~ Me

Doychin Dokov
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’m no fan of fat-shaming. BUT I’m no fan of such posts which do PROMOTE that being fat is okay... Because it’s not - and I’m not talking about the way you look or the words it provokes in others - but simply because it’s really bad for your health.

Sandi Gail
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Making a statement about how they hurt you isn't going to change them, it's doubtful if they ever think of you again. Ppl are mean, that's the way it is in this world. That's what I've learned, anyway. Hope you keep your good attitude though!

Herb Eaversmells
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm sure people will read into this wrong, and I must say before i start, no one needs to be made fun of or degraded in anyway. But, are these people really happy with their bodies? Or is that a lie they continue to tell themselves to mask their unhappiness? I'm not saying everyone needs to be take thin, ripped 6 pack and. But a little self control and exercise are a good thing.

Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’m sure she’s unhappy and that the fat feels uncomfortable but people definitely don’t need to pile on and make her feel worse. She should still be able to love herself even if she doesn’t like having fat on her stomach.

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blubfisher
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Telling an obese person not to lose weight because they are beautiful is like telling an alcoholic not to stop drinking because they are fun. Sorry, but fat isn't healthy and this whole body acceptance thing has gotten out of hand. At first it was just "you don't have to look like celebrities and models" and now its just "300 pounds overweight is beautiful! Don't you change your look! All those people saying its not healthy are just haters."

Stephanie Blasyak
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nobody said anything about telling obese people not to lose weight, this article was about not laughing at someone's body...

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Daria Z
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, I wouldn't make a statement by baring my body if I was ashamed of it. But I would never extend my personal decision to other people. Everyone should be able to do with their bodies anything they want without being laughed at.

Essihazcat
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow. I wish i was as confident as her. Im like, super thin and im SUPER self concious

Deborah B
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Judgemental idiots will stay that way. Just shrug, say f*ck them, and get on with your life. Bodies come in all shapes and sizes, and everyone has their own standard of modesty. Wear a bikini if you want. Wear a burkini if you want. Either way, someone is going to criticise you for it.

Chech Dasaus
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"The men who pointed at her laughing". I doubt that ever happened. I have never ever experienced someone openly pointing addy a fast person. Also from my experience it's mostly women who judge other women for their clothing.

Lauren Caswell
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes. Pointing and laughing happens. A lot. I'm not obese but I have a (sometimes) noticeable spinal disorder. I have been pointed and laughed at and openly mocked. Even as an adult. If people are willing to point and laugh at a disabled person, I'm sure they will do it to others too.

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Geralyn Sculley
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People are calling her curvy. She's not curvy, she's medically morbidly obese. There's a difference. Her "curves," as you call them are going to lead to diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure, and probably an early death. I'm not condoning people laughing at her but being that obese is NOT something to celebrate.

Lauren Caswell
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She isn't morbidly obese! Perhaps overweight to obese, around that mark. And so is much of the western world. This isn't about encouraging people to be unhealthy, it's about the impact bullying someone about their appearance can have

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Stephanie
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree that people should do as they please etc... Isn't this a bit extreme? As a chubby girl myself I take pride in the way I carry myself. I still wear "stylish" clothing and feel sexy but don't feel the need to draw attention to myself. You gain a positive self image within not by being the centerpiece of controversy. Everyone is never going to agree on anything so why set yourself up ?

Zero
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

While I fully agree that there needs to be a change in the way people view body shape, it needs to stop short of saying that obesity is normal. Unless you have a medical condition that prevents you from being able to control your weight, there is no good reason for anybody to be obese. Both my grandparents, my father, and one of my closest friends are all overweight, and they have all had health problems directly related to their weight, which has in turn affected their ability to function from day to day. I myself have struggled with my weight in the past, and after I started to lose said weight, my overall health saw a marked improvement.The conversation should be about preventing obesity in the first place and focusing on healthier living, not using "body image" as lame cop-out for being lazy and unhealthy.

Ben Smith
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Why does BP have such an obvious pro-fat agenda? It’s an incredibly unhealthy lifestyle you’re promoting!! Starting showing some responsibility!

the Demon girl
Community Member
5 years ago

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it is unhealthy to be that over wait ,the human body is not made to be that size. she lukes like a feminist

William Teach
Community Member
5 years ago

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First, there was no proof offered of anyone "shaming" her. Second, she isn't "curvy", she's obese. Hey, if she wants to be, that's on her. Her choice. But stop trying to mainstream being grossly fat, which is very unhealthy.

Aria Whitaker
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, because laughing and pointing at overweight people certainly couldn't make them ashamed, now could it? What do you think "shaming" is? You don't have to go up to someone and shout, "SHAME ON YOU" in order to effectively shame them, but I am positive you already know that...

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Seven Hits
Community Member
5 years ago

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Did anybody else get a sense that some of the details of her story seem like this might be another smollett incident?

Tyler Duffy
Community Member
5 years ago

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Seriously gross. When will smoke shaming become a thing? I'm looking forward to getting to play the victim for once. Lol. Seriously though, kinda, Nicotine is the single most addictive substance known to man kind. And you see adds all over the place about how bad smoking is for you, and about the health concerns associated with it. No one argues for the rights of smokers, no one argues that it's not there fault there addicted, there taxed at 1,000% and told to go elsewhere (NYC- you can't even smoke on the street) I'm halfway just f*****g around but there is something to said about how differently we treat those who choose to eat themselves into a early grave and those who literally can't stop smoking. It's also a great example of why socialized health care is unjust. It's not OK to make the guy/girl who do everything right as far a diet and exercise pay for the health cost of the morbidly obese and smokers who refuse to change.

Alia G.
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's an interesting point, whether you're a troll or not. One of the differences between smoking and overeating is that smoking is unhealthy for those around you. Second hand smoke is incredibly bad for you, especially to children. And smoke also leaves a scent on whatever it touches.

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Live Era Nemow
Community Member
5 years ago

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Seen the pic. I thought it was a story of rescuing a beached whale. Dissapointed that it is just another grossly fat human who wishes she was beautiful.

Wil Vanderheijden
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Woman Shuts Down Men Who Fat-Shamed Her At The Beach" . Yeah, In your dreams. Men and women will still belaughing and making jokes about her the next time she comes to the beach wearing a bikini. Sorry to burst your bubble, but this kind of people doesn't give a f*ck about your powerful responses and it won't change their appaling attitude against other people. Now downvote me.

Rafaella Bueno
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

By my experience, it'll actually make it worse. Getting her to write such a passionate response just reaffirms that they definitely had an impact on her... You don't need to reassure yourself if you really didn't care. Unfortunately, talking back to those people just fuels them.

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Biljana Malesevic
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Judging people by looks has always been stupid and it's still stupid. Mind your own business, leave others to enjoy life!

Megan Brady
Community Member
5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I go to the beach, I'm envious of the women like you. Im 28 years old and have never been comfortable enough to wear shorts or a bikini. my husband has started to make a unkind comment before to other women (not directly) but I stop him and say "I wish I had confidence like her" :) I've learned that a body size never defines a level of confidence. Period. You go girl :)

Davorka Banović
Community Member
5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Unless he's really aware why it was wrong - get a better man, someone who doesn't find himself called to invade the private space of others with such comments (and in basis his own sexual preferences which actually may disable him in having a meaningful relationship (not just a romantic one) with decent people because of his prejudice/preference), one who will help you get back the confidence that belongs to you, because I know where you are, I'm there too in some respects but I've gotten really far from where I was and learning to spot wholesome and truly supportive people for my closest circle was also part of that. don't justify his prejudices or handicaps in empathy and understanding by your own insecurity... and sorry if I'm babbling uninvited, my comment is only here for your consideration. I wish you nothing but the best :)

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Stille20
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can't stand when someone mocks and overweight person and the justification is, "well they are unhealthy". Public ridicule is not going to fix the obesity epidemic.. or do you think we should also be free to openly mock those with Opioid addictions too?

Peter Schaeffer
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Public shaming definitely impacts behavior. Note how much smoking has declined since it became socially unacceptable. I hate to say this, but "medicine" (a branch of "science") says that being overweight is bad for your health. Reality is not PC.

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Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you have time to worry about someone else’s fat or diet then you’re just wasting time that you could be worrying about your own exercise. No, not everyone is going to look how you like. That doesn’t mean you have to pay attention or be negative. Most of us could be doing something to look better in one way or another and yet we don’t. So why expect such big things out of bigger people? Please. What’s wrong with people being fat anyway? It only makes you look thinner tbh. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I’m kidding. But still. What kind of loser spends their time crying about SOMEONE ELSE being fat? What a depressing existence. I’d rather be happy about good things in my life than cry about someone looking chunky.

GoodWolf
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a shame that those guys will probably never see this post.

Roman Hans
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I moved from NYC to Berlin two years ago and my favorite thing here is “FKK.” It was a cultural movement in the 1920s saying all bodies are beautiful, bodyshaming is wrong, and the person with the problem is the bodyshamer. Everyone still follows it. As an American I’m still shocked to see totally out of shape, really old people NUDE SWIMMING and even the young people are like, “Isn’t that cool?” Because getting fresh air and exercise is great no matter what you look like. I wish America was as wise!

Sierra Hall
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's not accurate or fair to say that she waits in the line at McDonalds. I have almost the same body as her, except for the legs. My body is a result of a thyroid disorder. Unfortunately, no amount of medication or diet can correct the weight issue that comes with hashimoto's. Hell, I even have the lapband and it hasn't even helped that much. I just don't gain anymore. But saying that, she could have found a better bathing suit. I like to wear two pieces too but I choose ones that compliment my body type (high waist bottoms etc).

Valerie Lessard
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

so being fat and at the beach gives cruel pieces of s**t the right to take photos of random people and laugh at them? i hope much worse happens to them

NoName
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Please don't wish I'll on them :) just know that you have the self awareness to know the difference between being a respectful human being and being a mindless, a*****e bully :)

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Liz Karsa
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yet every day men with huge guts go shirtless. Talk about double standard.

StealTheFruit
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To everyone hear reading this, you are beautiful. Maybe not on the outside yet, but on the inside too. Maybe even both. Don't starve. Don't cut. Don't die. You are not a painting. You are not on display. You don't have to be perfect. You don't have to listen to insults. You are worth it. Keep going. <3

Daniel (ShadowDrakken)
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I want to point out too, for folk that don't get how hard women have it when shopping for clothes, that women's clothing sizes make no damn sense at all. They're inconsistent even within a single brand. They vary from style to style. And one size fits all is a lie. I have a petite plus wife, which means there's not a one-piece swimsuit on the planet that fits her. Which means she's forced to wear a two-piece to be comfortable and protect YOUR sensibilities (ie. Not be popping out all over the place.) She eats right, around 1500kcal, and makes healthy choices; but unfortunately, due to having her gal bladder removed and having EDS which limits her mobility, she has weight control issues. All this culminates to her having limited clothing options. And none of it is her fault. So before you decide to go body shaming people maybe spend a moment considering yourself in that position.

FortnitePlayerGirl
Community Member
5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No trends or perfect images should ever hinder our ideas that we were all made beautifully. Women should be allowed to do what they want without feeling insecure, and it is unnecessary to show bodies that are completely fake in magazines, TV shows, or anywhere in general as if they are perfect and real, because, yes, people do believe that those body types are achievable, and attempt to gain that body type while endangering their health. This woman is strong, and knows this, and we need more people out there that stand their ground in the face of unfair treatment. This woman is a hero, and I hope her confidence continues to inspire others.

NoName
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The energy that radiates from her smile and eyes is infectious :) in a perfect world, we wouldn't need to be reading things like this to validate ourselves. People wouldn't need to go through Hell so others could gain strength from the experience. But she has. And, girl, I'm soaking up your energy <3 thank you for showing that strength and empathy are beautiful in and of themselves <3

crazy_cat_notAlady
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

we are all glorified worm-food anyway. on the one hand we have people "upgrading" their limbs/body parts with bionic appendages and on the other we have specimens trying to measure the world with a tailoring tape. gah. just shut up and let others wear, eat, feel whatever they want to!

TiaMa
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I remember my mom telling me that if someone looks at me funny in my swimsuit, I shall visibly check them out from head to toes with a small pause around the middle and then just grin in contempt to their face while passing them. I might have been around 14.

Aroha
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No matter how healthy I ate or how much I exercised, my stomach never looked flat and "beautiful". I was 12 when I was first told that it is ugly and I would never find a partner. Both became self-fulfilling prophesies. A couple of weeks ago - 24 years later - I found out that I have endometriosis. It causes me to sometimes look pregnant, sometimes like I just ate too much. It won't go away with diet and exercise, because it is a lifelong, painful illness. I have never worn a bathing suit or been to a public beach, and probably never will, because my suffering body would end up as a meme for some self-centered teenagers (either in age or mental capacity) who don't know what it is like to stay up for entire nights as an alien is using a cheese grater to find a way out of your guts.

Carol Emory
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

At least the ones that point and laugh have managed to label themselves as unsuitable husbands. I know men that have divorced wife after wife because her body got, for lack of a better word, more plump after having a kid or two. They always felt like the wives should have kept themselves lean and fit. Meanwhile, these same men do little to help in the raising of the kids or maintaining the house..even when the wife also has a full-time career. They often run off to hang out with friends. Those men have no idea what true love is. It's sad really. I just wish those women could have seen what they were truly like before they wasted their time on them.

Bill
Community Member
5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She should have put the effort into sunscreen. She gets redder every photo that day

Aletia Johnson
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think you’re beautiful just the way you are. You only need two things to wear a bikini - a torso and a pelvis. If you don’t have both of those you’ve got bigger problems than swimwear. I would have punched them and kicked sand in their stoopid faces if they’d said that to me. I’m 42 years old and a size 18 and I don’t even OWN a one piece swimsuit any more. Bikinis are way more comfy!

Amie Redman
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wish I had her confidence. My husband bought me an adorable bikini and I have only worn it once. I wish we could all just not judge one another.

FluffyGaming
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love the inspirational comments! But never would I wear a bikini. I get a “sand wedgie” oh an funny stuff i saw a rather large woman shaming another m (smaller) woman cause she was wearing a bikini like whaaaaat

Chris A
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The fattie shut nothing down. Maybe if she stopped shoving food into her mouth and went for a walk, she would be able to wear a bikini without looking like a pig.

mithril
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, you don't need to starve yourself to lose weight, you just have to stop eating unhealthy c**p.

Margaret Shannon
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Men will always find something to criticize about women. Women will never be pretty enough, or slender enough, or smart enough, or submissive enough. Lots of guys claim to be the exception, but are silent in situations like this. If there really were as many good men as claim to be, the bad men would be ashamed to show themselves.

mac
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You can't say men don't put up with this kind of bs. What about the old dude with a beer belly rockin a speedo? We've all seen them at the beach. And we have all said to ourselves, "My eyes!!!" Difference being most men don't give a F*CK! There are plenty of men who are self conscious about being at the beach. This isn't a women only issue.

John Carr
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What the hell is so wrong with a bit of podge? Or scars? Or a skin ailment? It's all just exterior. Show off the inside person by showing the outside person and to hell with the begrudgers! I'm overweight, have scars from self-harm and covered with horrible psoriasis blotches. I got slagged for wearing shorts on a beach but still keep wearing them and showing off my "imperfections". Keep rocking Shelly!

Monica small
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The funny thing is that these men probably did not have ideal bodies either. I'm thinking beer bellies with toothpick legs.

My dog is my co pilot.
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You go to ANY beach in the world and you will see dozens of men far far bigger than her with their bellies out and wobbling around all over the place and nothing will be said. A woman does it and the internet goes into meltdown. For goodness sake guys GET OVER YOURSELVES AND GET A LIFE. This woman is my new heroine. She is just absolutely beautiful awesome amazing and wonderful in every way.

Slune
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If I imagine how many fat guys with no neck, bold head,hairy backs,barrel sized beer bellies and wretched thin legs. I must say we women are very tolerant!

anisub
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

shutting them down would imply that she confronted them...

Othman Kh
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Judging people by looks has always been stupid and it's still stupid. Mind your own business, leave others to enjoy life

Kerolos Saleib
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I didn't even open the article cause the title in itself made me ill.... First m'en and other women woukd of done that to her, but mostly why not change the title to something more empowering as opposed to subjecting women to men's ideologies.... Like she had to prove a point to men... Who cares about these low life men who sexualité women and are there to touch themselves. Why isn't the camera turned around to show who these mysoginistic men are instead.

Peter Schaeffer
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hate to say this, but "medicine" (a branch of "science") says that being overweight is bad for your health. Reality is not PC.

Debbie Lyn Jones (Deb)
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

Michael Scruggs
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

Rider
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Zaftig is a fancy word for 'makes my mouth water.'" ~ Me

Doychin Dokov
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’m no fan of fat-shaming. BUT I’m no fan of such posts which do PROMOTE that being fat is okay... Because it’s not - and I’m not talking about the way you look or the words it provokes in others - but simply because it’s really bad for your health.

Sandi Gail
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Making a statement about how they hurt you isn't going to change them, it's doubtful if they ever think of you again. Ppl are mean, that's the way it is in this world. That's what I've learned, anyway. Hope you keep your good attitude though!

Herb Eaversmells
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm sure people will read into this wrong, and I must say before i start, no one needs to be made fun of or degraded in anyway. But, are these people really happy with their bodies? Or is that a lie they continue to tell themselves to mask their unhappiness? I'm not saying everyone needs to be take thin, ripped 6 pack and. But a little self control and exercise are a good thing.

Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’m sure she’s unhappy and that the fat feels uncomfortable but people definitely don’t need to pile on and make her feel worse. She should still be able to love herself even if she doesn’t like having fat on her stomach.

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blubfisher
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Telling an obese person not to lose weight because they are beautiful is like telling an alcoholic not to stop drinking because they are fun. Sorry, but fat isn't healthy and this whole body acceptance thing has gotten out of hand. At first it was just "you don't have to look like celebrities and models" and now its just "300 pounds overweight is beautiful! Don't you change your look! All those people saying its not healthy are just haters."

Stephanie Blasyak
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nobody said anything about telling obese people not to lose weight, this article was about not laughing at someone's body...

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Daria Z
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, I wouldn't make a statement by baring my body if I was ashamed of it. But I would never extend my personal decision to other people. Everyone should be able to do with their bodies anything they want without being laughed at.

Essihazcat
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow. I wish i was as confident as her. Im like, super thin and im SUPER self concious

Deborah B
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Judgemental idiots will stay that way. Just shrug, say f*ck them, and get on with your life. Bodies come in all shapes and sizes, and everyone has their own standard of modesty. Wear a bikini if you want. Wear a burkini if you want. Either way, someone is going to criticise you for it.

Chech Dasaus
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"The men who pointed at her laughing". I doubt that ever happened. I have never ever experienced someone openly pointing addy a fast person. Also from my experience it's mostly women who judge other women for their clothing.

Lauren Caswell
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes. Pointing and laughing happens. A lot. I'm not obese but I have a (sometimes) noticeable spinal disorder. I have been pointed and laughed at and openly mocked. Even as an adult. If people are willing to point and laugh at a disabled person, I'm sure they will do it to others too.

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Geralyn Sculley
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People are calling her curvy. She's not curvy, she's medically morbidly obese. There's a difference. Her "curves," as you call them are going to lead to diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure, and probably an early death. I'm not condoning people laughing at her but being that obese is NOT something to celebrate.

Lauren Caswell
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She isn't morbidly obese! Perhaps overweight to obese, around that mark. And so is much of the western world. This isn't about encouraging people to be unhealthy, it's about the impact bullying someone about their appearance can have

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Stephanie
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree that people should do as they please etc... Isn't this a bit extreme? As a chubby girl myself I take pride in the way I carry myself. I still wear "stylish" clothing and feel sexy but don't feel the need to draw attention to myself. You gain a positive self image within not by being the centerpiece of controversy. Everyone is never going to agree on anything so why set yourself up ?

Zero
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

While I fully agree that there needs to be a change in the way people view body shape, it needs to stop short of saying that obesity is normal. Unless you have a medical condition that prevents you from being able to control your weight, there is no good reason for anybody to be obese. Both my grandparents, my father, and one of my closest friends are all overweight, and they have all had health problems directly related to their weight, which has in turn affected their ability to function from day to day. I myself have struggled with my weight in the past, and after I started to lose said weight, my overall health saw a marked improvement.The conversation should be about preventing obesity in the first place and focusing on healthier living, not using "body image" as lame cop-out for being lazy and unhealthy.

Ben Smith
Community Member
5 years ago

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Why does BP have such an obvious pro-fat agenda? It’s an incredibly unhealthy lifestyle you’re promoting!! Starting showing some responsibility!

the Demon girl
Community Member
5 years ago

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it is unhealthy to be that over wait ,the human body is not made to be that size. she lukes like a feminist

William Teach
Community Member
5 years ago

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First, there was no proof offered of anyone "shaming" her. Second, she isn't "curvy", she's obese. Hey, if she wants to be, that's on her. Her choice. But stop trying to mainstream being grossly fat, which is very unhealthy.

Aria Whitaker
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, because laughing and pointing at overweight people certainly couldn't make them ashamed, now could it? What do you think "shaming" is? You don't have to go up to someone and shout, "SHAME ON YOU" in order to effectively shame them, but I am positive you already know that...

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Seven Hits
Community Member
5 years ago

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Did anybody else get a sense that some of the details of her story seem like this might be another smollett incident?

Tyler Duffy
Community Member
5 years ago

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Seriously gross. When will smoke shaming become a thing? I'm looking forward to getting to play the victim for once. Lol. Seriously though, kinda, Nicotine is the single most addictive substance known to man kind. And you see adds all over the place about how bad smoking is for you, and about the health concerns associated with it. No one argues for the rights of smokers, no one argues that it's not there fault there addicted, there taxed at 1,000% and told to go elsewhere (NYC- you can't even smoke on the street) I'm halfway just f*****g around but there is something to said about how differently we treat those who choose to eat themselves into a early grave and those who literally can't stop smoking. It's also a great example of why socialized health care is unjust. It's not OK to make the guy/girl who do everything right as far a diet and exercise pay for the health cost of the morbidly obese and smokers who refuse to change.

Alia G.
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's an interesting point, whether you're a troll or not. One of the differences between smoking and overeating is that smoking is unhealthy for those around you. Second hand smoke is incredibly bad for you, especially to children. And smoke also leaves a scent on whatever it touches.

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Live Era Nemow
Community Member
5 years ago

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Seen the pic. I thought it was a story of rescuing a beached whale. Dissapointed that it is just another grossly fat human who wishes she was beautiful.

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