Respect is not learned by being told to "behave" but by being given respect. From day one on.

Yes! This!

This is my uncle in a nutshell.

I am sure I have as many parental failings as anyone else (possibly more) but I've never understood this one, even if a parent does stick to not being angry. I've always said to my kids that if they've wronged someone, by accident or on purpose, then that person has a right to be angry. Of course they also have a responsibility about how they behave, just because you let someone down or scratched their car or whatever doesn't mean they can now hit you or pour personal insults on you. But yes, they have a right to express how they feel and you have to accept that. It doesn't mean you're less of a person, it means you're taking it on the chin as you should. I then talk about how these things will come out somehow and that person will always end up angry at some point, and it's a million times better to be upfront and in control and deal with it as soon as possible, than for them to find out you've lied and hidden it from then. Boy, then they're really going to be furious.

Failure is a great teacher. Frankly so is pain. To a point, if you don’t let them fail, they will freak out when they do, and they will.

OH MY GOD THANK YOU

It's one thing to put a kid in someone else's shoes to show them shaming someone for being different isn't cool. But what this one means is it's toxic to actually cause traumatic humiliation and embarrassment for something like soiling the bed at night, or publicly shaming them just because they did something wrong at home.

It will also lead to children learning very quick how to hide stuff and lie.

EXACTLY. I remember being hit by a boy in kindergarten, and the teacher told him he couldn't hit me because I was a girl. I was FURIOUS. 'I've got a right to be hit! I WANT TO BE HIT!' Long story short, my parents got called in along with the parents of the boy and there was a whole thing about it.

EQUAL RIGHTS EQUAL FIGHTS

self-defense should have NO GENDER

This is how you raise a wife beater. Congratulations.

While I agree that there is no difference between a girl and a boy. F your "mutual combat". There's another option, teach a kid to walk away. Whether it's a boy or a girl picking a fight. Self defence, yes, engaging in a fight just to win. No. Mutual combat.... Tsk.

That's absolutely crazy!! You should be teaching them to go get an adult, not hit girls. This mindset is what produces abuse on woman when they get older. I got the absolute crap beat out of me by a boyfriend when I was younger, just because I wouldn't have sexual with him. I ended up in the hospital with two broken ribs and a broken jaw. I'm guessing his parents taught him like you're referring. Shame on you!!

Yes. Keep your hands to yourself and stop thinking being female gives you a pass to hit a male with zero consequences. And guys, stop white knighting for girls who strike first after he retaliates.

Mutual combat, or Mortal Combat? Sorry, I couldn't stop myself from comming this.

Gender doesn't give any (dis)advantage until after puberty. By then, a parent should have had ample opportunity to teach not to fight. If not, then there is much more wrong than the gender inequality.

Horse s**t. Why do you think girls and boys sparr together? Parents tell their kids not to hit a girl even if they hit you is absolute horseshit.

I came home after school one with a small cut above my eye, a split lip and bruise on my cheek. My ma asked what happened and I told her about the girl that started hitting me, and she does it to a lot of people because she know that boys can't hit girls. My ma said 'I don't give a s**t if she's a girl. If someone is hitting you, put them on their a**e! Try shoving them over first, but if they carry on, do whatever is necessary to defend yourself.' Turns out I didn't learn the whole 'boys not hitting girls this' at home. Even my dad said 'Should've knocked her out, she wouldn't do it again'.

They should be taught to respect women PERIOD. As far as getting smacked around, if you don't deserve it NOBODY should touch you.

Now Y'all done made Sally mad.

I thought it said there's no gender in mortal combat.

I ... think this might only apply to little girls that people think are attractive. I got into plenty of fights - I'd be picked on and I'd defend myself - was hit back all the time... and then **I** would get in trouble for "not acting ladylike".

Lol my mum somethimes uses this excuse when my brother hits me.

That is stupid and idiotic.

But wait....the next article will be " dad is an asshole cause he told his son to hit back a girl"..... And everyone will comment dad's a toxic parent and he doesn't deserve kids.

Truth. Both genders should be taught not to hit people. As in not to be the aggressor, but everyone has a right to defend themselves.

I feel the same even though I'm a girl. If I ever hit anyone for any reason they should be allowed to defend themselves against me in any way necessary.

Yeah, but in real life as adults, a man defending himself against a raging, abusive wife, is still jailed while she’s left at home “because of the kids.” Same charge against them both, he’s in jail all weekend, she’s laughing about it at home. For now anyway. She’ll face her charges too but she isn’t suffering a holiday weekend in jail like the husband she attacked. True, current story. 🤦‍♂️ Boys are taught not to defend themselves because the law still doesn’t allow them to.

Of course, no one should be hitting anyone but when you teach that boys and men cannot defend themselves you wind up with domestic abuse where the man is the victim. I've seen this with many men and it is impossible for them to get justice. See also Johnny Depp.

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Yes and no. The thing is when you're an adult the average man is much stronger than the average women, so if u get into a physical fight it's often one sided. If men were raised to see women as physical equals domestic violence would be much worse. Having said that, no one should be hitting anyone regardless of gender and this don't hit girls rule also makes men think that beating the pulp out of other men is ok because they should be able to take it, which is messed up.

"Stop f*****g crying or I will slap you" one or my dads greatest hits

That said, you have to allow that parents do know their children and they do know when a child 'isn't hungry' because they have a standard main course and can't be bothered, but half an hour later are going to be whining in the kitchen because they're hungry and can they just have some biscuits or crisps. There's a balancing act, this is why parenting is harding than it looks on the surface.

I have an acquaintance whose son's answer to being told "no" is "I love you", like that should change the answer to yes.

I refused to be like my brother in school simply for that reason. My parents always used that line on me and I HATED it. Not just because my brother was a huge d**k head and a bully.

Isn’t it crazy how some parents have this mentality? It never even crossed my mind when I had my kids, did everything I was supposed to do, especially the essentials.

Yes! My parents always yell at me together. It's a team job. But it does have the effect of alienating neither of them. And I get my own back when it's my turn to lay the table--I give them sporks instead of forks.

I was chastised because I was teaching my younger brother how to wash clothes and prepare meals after our mom died. He was only twelve, but I was ten years older. I felt like he deserved a boost to be able to fend for himself and clean up after himself.

There is a small step before explaining EVERYTHING about your decisions - sometimes you have to make a decision because otherwise your electricity will be cut off, and telling the truth will unnecessarily cause your child to worry about the household finances when they are much too young to grasp every nuance or be able to do a damn thing about it and becomes one of those people who watches every single penny well into adulthood even though they have a good job and a comfortable life. Sometimes "because" is the right answer to protect a child.