Yeh can't top that, you win.

smart kid....the kid sent THE plumber

You're a heartless mother. They'll be in therapy for years.

My niece recently had a huge melt down because her brother gave their mom a high five. Apparently she's the only one who's allowed to do that. :)

Rookie mistake; never leave the chance this wide open for a kid to insert some brutality.

it should be. right up there with acid

Yep now it's the granddaughter coning in now.

OK that's actually clever.

Showing us clearly why you shouldn't waste money on status symbols.

My preteen and I are reading a book series where dragons are the main characters. It gets pretty violent, and since this was the first time we'd read a violent thing together, I tried to reason "Well they ARE dragons, not humans, so it's less of an issue because dragons are naturally going to be violent creatures." My kid side-eyed me and stated "Yeah, but it was written by a human, and the dragons all act and think like humans, so it's REALLY not that different, mom." ... ok... fine, be all logical. it's a really good series and we've both been enjoying them.

That’s not a lot of apples for 6 YEARS!!?

come on this is sooo cute

Followed by “NO NOT IN YOUR MOUTH”

What the heck did you do to earn that?

Someone has unlocked a new level of "King of the Hill"

Last 3 answers tell you that you're doing a great. Forget that he thinks you're 80, lol.

Jesus wore sandals to church, so why can't your kid?

TIL that parents exist who do not child lock their cabinets or leave them alone with stuff - and are still surprised with this outcome ...

I had to run away from a toddler and hide the lavender baby lotion on the top shelf of the coat closet after every bath to keep him from eating it all. He has just started not to leave CK any extra lotion off her s hands at 7

bad parent!

I can't believe he did it without breaking it.

Ok but like one time I was horsing around too much one morning w my dad, and he was playfully holding me against the wall, but I told the school he slammed me into the wall and they sent someone to interview him. My stupid a*s almost had him lose custody of us

My rabbits have made a similar puzzle for me…

Someone wants to collect some life insurance

no, let the child speak

There’s still some there!

The no at the end

every day is a school day, it's just that some lessons are remembered for ever.

Smort 👍

Sure that wasn't your wife?

Ohhhh that had some BIG feelings behind it. Hope it's all worked out now!

O, come on, cats do that much more often. And kids can learn not to do it. Cats can also learn, but will do it anyway.

Oops!

How high do you have your heating on? If the radiators are glowing it’s time to turn down the thermostat

4 year olds should never be able to touch anything as pointy as those scissors. Lock that s**t up. * remembers horror story about young child cutting off her cat's whiskers; poor kitty was never the same *

That's not okay no matter the age. Also how did he sell them without you noticing?

That sucks. But "favorite thesaurus" says a lot. Lol

Could have been worse. At least they didn't zip one extra tight around a part of the anatomy of one or the other.

That’s a psychopath, get out before he escalates.

That child was born with zero f***s to give

teach them how to clean up after themselves

Without even knowing, what actually happened, this picture just shows a burning golf cart. Could have been a defect. That has nothing to do with bad parenting for now.

73 texts!

What a waste :(

If it's sharpie, you can just use an ethanol alchohol-based hand sanitizer to wipe it off. Worked at a book store where we'd get in orders of deep discount books the sellers thought ought to have a sharpie mark across the covers of. We'd used alchohol based hand santiizer because it was just strong enough to lift the all the ink without seriously drying our hands out like a rubbing alchohol would. Please don't throw out your monitor just because there's marker on it.

My brother wanted to join the Power Rangers once and he had this little Power Rangers sword and when the villain was onscreen he repeatedly whacked him and the screen broke. My brother is so powerful in the Power Rangers universe he accidentally destroyed reality.

Thats a lovely mushroom drawing

Well they aren’t wrong