We named this list "Parenting Failures", but it's more about the realities of being a parent than the failures. It's important to know the difference between rough patches every parent feels and actual parental failure. Ashley Hudson LMFT explains that difference on her blog.

"Parental failure is when a parent causes significant trauma and/or physical or emotional damage to their child through their parenting style," she writes. "This could be in the form of abuse, neglect, abandonment, and/or when parents are involved in substances or violence that is affecting their parenting."

What most parents mean when they say they think they're failing as parents is just stress and weariness talking. Hudson writes that it's a response to a stressful event, several days, weeks or months. True parental failure has serious long-term repercussions for the child.

One of the reasons parents feel this way is because they feel too much pressure. Either from the outside or from themselves. Tia Slightham, M Ed. and Parenting Coach writes that parents desperately want to feel they are enough. Not messing up their kids, doing the right things as a parent. But the truth is, according to her, "if you love your kids, you're trying your best and you keep trying to learn," that's enough.

Ashley Hudson narrows down the things that might make one feel like a failing parent. Most parents, according to her, feel they have too little patience while disciplining. Others panic when they don't feel control over tantrums, rebellions and defiant behavior. First-time parents have it the worst – they simply haven't had the experience.

A Certified Positive Discipline Educator and Life Coach for Parents Adrienne Bishop writes that these feelings of failure also stem from the fact that parents have no control over kids. "The fact is, our children have agency, which means they have the ability to make their own choices. No matter what you want your child to do, they ultimately have the final say."

Bishop writes that when parents think they're failing, they're blaming themselves for their kids' actions. "We try to control our kids’ behavior in order for us to feel better," she claims. "But since it is impossible to control others' behavior, we consistently struggle to feel good, and to not feel like failures, and then as a result we give our power over to our kids and become their victims."

The educator recommends redirecting thoughts since they are one thing parents can control. Instead of thinking "I have failed my child" or "She will always eat this way" try to think: "I am learning how to help my child make better food choices." Bishop writes: "After I work on changing my thoughts, I can start taking steps to set limits and expectations from a place of acceptance and peace and not blame or overwhelm."

Tia Slightham has some simple, down-to-earth recommendations for struggling parents. The first one is to get enough sleep. Try going to bed just a few minutes earlier each night. She writes that without enough sleep it's easier to give in to bad thoughts and frustration. You're truly not you when you're tired.

Secondly, Slightham advises to learn to walk away. Parents can avoid unwanted outbursts of anger and frustration if they try counting to ten. "Learn from your mistakes and next time try your best to walk away before you open your mouth and yell, give empty threats or say something you regret," she writes in her blog.

Her last tip is to document one good thing you did each day – doesn't matter how small. "Maybe you and your child had an amazing snuggle and book time before bed. You were able to connect during a board game. You kindly asked your child to brush their teeth instead of harping them." Slightham lists all these strategies as examples.