If she loses custody it's not because OP was being "petty" but because she was being extremely unreliable and obviously not caring about them. So no one to blame but herself.

Poor kids. What if the babysitter was trying to call coz one of the kids was injured or other kind of emergency. This mum needs a good kick up the a**e, you don't do that s**t. By all means have a night out but remember you still have a duty to your children and should be available to be contacted or have a back up just in case. This is all on the mum, and sadly it's the kids that have to suffer the consequences of her selfish carelessness.

We NEVER left our son with a babysitter without her knowing exactly where we were going to be in case she needed to get a hold of us for emergencies. We would tell her we were going out to dinner and a movie, so she would have some idea of when we would return. I cannot ever begin to think of leaving our son without the sitter being able to get a hold of us. This is totally and completely mindblowing. She deserves to lose her kids.

Kids deserve a parent that cares about them and one that doesn't just disappear with no warning and no explanation. She's just pissed because she was caught being irresponsible. Most definitely NTA, that's all on the mother. I sincerely hope these children end up with family who cares more about them than constant nights out.

At first I thought perhaps the babysitter should have simply waited this one out and never work for this mom again. Calling the police does seem a bit over the top, until you consider that should this not have happened, the mom would have just found another babysitter and probably gone through many of them until she found one that didn't care. This not only seems disrespectful toward babysitters, but more importantly neglectful toward her kids. If she wants to be living the single life, then hand the kids over to the dad or someone else who will be there for them. Bringing in too many people to care for them instead of her can't be good for their development and there is also a risk of bringing in the wrong person who might abuse them and she would never know it. So yes, in this case I happen to agree with what the babysitter did and although she did it out of self-interest (can't blame her either), in the long run this will hopefully also make sure those kids aren't neglected or put in any danger.

If you make a schedule, stick to it. Otherwise, you're showing a pattern of unreliability, erratic behavior, and disregard for the children's welfare. IMHO.

Guess what schools do when you don’t pick up your child and they can’t get a hold of you? That’s right! They call the police… who pick up the child/children… and file a report with DCF.

I don't understand people who are trying to protect the mother. The kids are the most important health and this is a pattern of neglect and she was warned and chose to ignore her calls.She's clearly the AH

Children are abused and neglected by their parents all the time and police don't care. If this woman does lose her kids, there is clearly A LOT more going on there than her just being late home one night. So blaming the babysitter for it is pathetic.

Me personally, I wouldn't have let it get this far. You leave me taking care of your kids for any extra hours! i'm not coming back. The sitter isn't responsible for legal troubles. If it wasn't her it would have been some other sitter. What a horrible mom here, horrible.

Are you KIDDING ME?! NTA!!! I (along with having been an Au Pair/ nanny/ babysitter myself) have NEVER heard of a parent NOT being able to "get in contact with!" Like, E-V-E-R!!! IDK that I would have been so generous as Electronic_Professor, though- as far as the number of times allowing the "parent" to be late. For me, three times the charm. After that comes ONE warning- in TEXT, for PROOF. IF (to the powers that be, hopefully 'it' wouldn't go "there"), but IF, for SOME reason, "it" would happen again- NO warning- just DOING. (As in, going to the police.) Let's recap: THREE chances. ONE warning. Time's up = ACTION. Period.

I'm a private Nanny and I actually have in my contract that I can call the non-emergency police line if you are not there to relieve me. I gave you an hour and a half before I call this is taken directly from my contract: If the family has been more than an hour late and cannot be reached, the Nanny will call emergency contacts. If it has been more than an hour and a half and neither the Family nor emergency contacts can be reached, the Family agrees that the Nanny has has permission to call the non-emergency police line. Nanny will receive 2X pay during this time for the inconvenience. far too many times, I have been stuck somewhere simply because I cannot legally leave. And parents take advantage of this. They know that we cannot legally walk out the door and leave the children behind, so they trap us there. I've been trapped as long as six or seven hours after my home daycare closed because I absolutely could not get anybody to pick up the kids, and I didn't have a car seat. I was entirely too kind and I did not call the police although I should have. they were my neighbors as well as my clients and they took horrendous advantage of me. I actually ended up releasing them as clients due to this and other things that they did.

How can anyone think this person was an ahole. This is deffo a NTA story what if the kids were sick or injured, not to mention you are at someone's house it's not like you can just go to bed so that poor babysitter would have had to stay awake until 3am had they not done something sooner. I'm glad they got the dad involved cuz clearly the mum can't be asked and I feel because there have been enough instances of the mum doing this you have a solid case for taking the kids away

NTA. Honestly if that had happened to me, I’d be calling the cops, if not for the kids then because I’d probably have been thinking something bad had happened to her. If you’re an adult and promise to be somewhere at certain time, especially somewhere important, and you’re a no call, no show, you really can’t act all that surprised when people call the cops, if for nothing else to make sure you’re not lying dead in the ditch

NTA .... The mom needs to be easily gotten ahold of in case of an emergency..... And just in general.

I hope she loses custody. These children need a parent, not a useless, self-centered, entitled diva.

The mom seems like a manipulative abuser. She is blaming the babysitter for something that she is responsible for. Those poor kids.

What. The. Hell. Even if we ignore the beyond rude and entitled disregard for another person's time, what if the sitter had been calling from the emergency room? If my children aren't physically with me, my phone is ALWAYS within arm's reach. I'd have that phone to my ear before the first ring even finished.

NTA. My parents were separated and so if my mum wanted to go out I'd go to my dads for the night, even though I was there every weekend anyway. I was able to cook basic meals and such kind of young, so if my mum had to go pick one of her friends up she'd wake me up, let me know she was going out and lock the door and she'd put the home phone set on her mobile number for if I needed something.

Definitely NTA. The sitter's actions were NOT petty. Obvs mom has no problem doing what she wants to do and the heck with everyone else. We went through this with my stepdaughter's mom. Once she was 10 HOURS LATE picking up her own daughter. Every single time she went away for the weekend, she would do the same thing.

One my kids went through this, they babysat for roommate moms who were exotic dancers, they would leave early evening and supposed to be home after work, so 2-3am, but they would always find a party after work. My kids put up with this all summer. One Friday night they went to work as usual, Saturday morning, no show, no call, they brought the kids over to our place, we continuously tried to reach them all day into the night, no luck. By Sunday morning the baby was out of diapers and there was no food in the house, the no food in the house was the reason they brought them to our place. So, I had a talk with the oldest and got the names of the children's grandparents, who all lived in another city some ours away from us, I informed them what had been going on for months and suggested that we file missing persons reports on both moms, which would trigger the police to contact CAS, all the grandparents drove hours to get to our city and take custody of the children.

Why is it always the awful people that breed?

I think the mother should own up to her irresponsibility towards leaving her children. In the babysitters defense what if there was a car accident or critical situation that occurred? How could you just not respond to calls or texts? What if the kids had an emergency or the babysitter had a family.emergency? It is rude and dismissive and as a mother I would never leave my child like that and not respond! Who does that and then wonder why no one wants to babysit for YOU!

NTA... I'm a parent of 5 ages ranging from 31-13 I've never left my children with someone and didn't not call at least once or twice while I was out to check on my children because as a responsible loving parent... That is what you do!! You want to know that your children are ok while you're away. That lady acts as though she cares nothing about them children so B. S. did the right thing.

NTA with the actions taken towards the mom, but I wonder if it was worth traumatizing the kids with a trip to the police station and not knowing where their mom is? Although it could mean there's a pattern of neglect going on. I don't know. I'm conflicted.

if the mother kept pulling that bshit quit babysitting for her...nobody needs that grief

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She's definitely NTA but I feel really bad for the kids having to go to the police station at 1 am.

she is 100% being a neglectful parent. Not answering your calls or coming home to her children when promised is a major issue. Plus she is being completely disrespectful of you and your life. I see nothing wrong with your actions

No one thinks they are both assholes? The babysitter knew 100% going in that the mother is a repeat offender when it comes to return times. Was the allure of "easy" money too strong to just say no? Why would she think this time would have been any different? Maybe the babysitter is lying here and wanted to get the cops involved. The internet is a slippery slope.