Despite the fact that parents should do their utmost to protect and nurture us, some adults simply do not know how to control their worst impulses. Narcissists, abusers, and deadbeats can still manage to have kids, to their offspring’s woe.

A woman described the conflict she had with her mother, who decided to try and gaslight her into thinking she agreed to pay for her cosmetic surgery. As often happens with children of narcissistic parents, OP didn’t even understand just how toxic her mother was until netizens talked her through it in the comments section.

Parents might at times ask their children for help or favors

Image credits: StudioPeace (not the actual photo)

But one narcissistic mom tried to convince and pressure her daughter into paying for her plastic surgery

Image credits: Rawpixel (not the actual photo)

Image credits: shellygotsugar

Readers identified that OP’s mom’s behavior was very abnormal

While we only have some descriptions of OP’s mother’s behavior, many signs point to her being a narcissist. From a refusal to grasp reality, to constant manipulation of those around her, this sort of behavior is sadly common. In some ways, it’s almost hard to blame the narcissist, as this mental condition can completely cloud their judgment.

In some ways, OP’s mother might not even think she is doing anything wrong. The entitlement that comes with rampant narcissism can truly convince folks that they are simply in the right. To the despair of any who encounter them, these sorts of narcissists tend to make their delusions everyone else’s issue, as OP’s story clearly demonstrates.

A common issue for the children of these kinds of parents is the inability to understand that their behavior is abnormal. After all, a child only knows what they have experienced. This is somewhat visible in OP’s story since her mother’s actions are truly bizarre, but she didn’t quite understand that until people pointed it out online.

Image credits: Daria Obymaha (not the actual photo)

Growing up with a narcissistic parent has many side effects

The good news is, should the child establish some distance and perspective, it often becomes clear that their parent is a narcissist. However, the nature of child-parent relationships often makes this difficult. After all, if you live in the same city, how exactly do you create real distance? The parent often knows this as well, so they will do their best to ensure proximity.

The result, for the child, is a higher risk of depression, self-esteem issues, and, in this case, a financial burden. This is visible even in OP’s decision to ask the internet for a second opinion on an open-and-shut case. This is not to disparage her, as previously mentioned, these kinds of parents do their utmost to shame their kids into believing their delusions.

This is particularly horrible, as the offspring of these sorts of people often struggle with a number of major issues. Because a narcissist tends to not be very giving with praise or attention, their kids tend to be overly attention-starved and clingy in future relationships. They also tend to undervalue themselves to an unhealthy degree. So hopefully, the comments on this post can be a wake-up call for OP.

OP shared some pertinent details later

[Reactions]

Most readers thought she was not at all to blame

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