Women Spill The Craziest Apologies They’ve Heard From Men (30 Examples)
Interview With ExpertToday, we are going to talk about the three magic words, "I am sorry". That's how easy it is to apologize; wouldn't you think so? Well, apparently not, because people don't always say what they mean, and at times, they twist their words just to escape accountability.
When X (formerly Twitter) user moh__mi asked netizens to "apologize like a man," people couldn't hold back. Well, especially women, as they let out the most ridiculous and hilarious "apologies" that they have received from men, and trust us, almost all of these don't even sound like apologies!
More info: X
Image credits: Timur Weber / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: moh__mi
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If you can't help making me feel bad, why should I tolerate your presence?
To understand why men refuse to apologize, Bored Panda got in touch with Sri Rajasekar, a marriage coach for women, who mentioned, "The tendency for women to apologize more frequently than men can be viewed through various lenses. While some interpretations suggest it reflects societal power dynamics, it’s essential to consider that both men and women navigate different expectations and pressures in relationships. "
"Cultural norms often encourage women to be more relational and nurturing, which can lead to more frequent apologies. However, men may feel societal pressure to embody strength and assertiveness, which can influence their approach to apologies. This dynamic doesn't solely point to a power imbalance but rather highlights the complexity of gender roles in communication and conflict resolution."
My father found out that my now husband, then boyfriend, and I were sleeping in the same bed; in our own apartment that we were paying for with our own money. He was livid and said he didn't want to see either of us again, that we were dead to him. His "apology"? After days of no contact whatsoever, sending a text asking if my boyfriend and I wanted some of the food he cooked. Important context: my boyfriend and I were sharing a bed but weren't sleeping with each other, because we decided to wait untill marriage for that. Meanwhile: my father got my mother pregnant before marrying her, same as my brother and his wife, my second brother got two women pregnant and only married the second one over a year after the birth of their first kid, my sister got pregnant with her first kid before marriage while still living with our parents... Oh, and our apartment was a one bedroom.
Sri narrated, "Childhood socialization significantly impacts how both boys and girls learn to navigate accountability. Boys may be socialized to prioritize toughness and self-reliance, which can lead to less encouragement to express remorse openly. Conversely, girls often receive more social reinforcement for nurturing behaviors, including apologizing."
When speaking about the impacts on men who consistently avoid apologizing or taking accountability, Sri noted that it can lead to unresolved conflicts, eroded trust, and strained relationships. He also stressed that avoiding accountability can hinder personal growth and self-reflection, leading to patterns of defensiveness.
If you need to think that hard about what to say, it can't be the truth
I HATE this one.. in my opinion, it's a catch-all to minimize any crappy behavior and a back-handed way to insinuate that the other person "expects" perfection and is obviously the unreasonable one.
Sri also pointed out that men and women may perceive apologies differently and be influenced by societal norms. For some men, he added, apologizing can be seen as a sign of vulnerability, which might be interpreted as weakness in certain contexts.
According to Sri, this perception can be tied to traditional notions of masculinity, where pride and ego play significant roles. This does throw a light on why some men would rather deviate from the conflict rather than apologize.
Throughout the interview, Sri stressed how important it is to recognize that many men value accountability and see the importance of apologies in maintaining healthy relationships. He also explained that many families and cultures encourage all children to value honesty and accountability equally.
"Avoiding apologies is not an inherent trait of all men; many actively engage in accountability and see positive outcomes in their relationships. Overall, the effects depend significantly on individual choices and the dynamics of specific relationships," he concluded.
Just because you had good intentions doesn’t diminish how much it hurt. This might be more acceptable if it was followed by an “I’m sorry.”
Our expert definitely gave us something to think about when it comes to apologizing, whether you are a man or a woman. Well, that's it from our end - now we hand over the platform to you as we want to hear your thoughts about the matter.
As you scroll down and enjoy the rest of the list, don't hesitate to jot down your personal experiences in the comments about receiving apologies from men. We would be delighted to hear from you!
My dad when I confronted him after he called me evil in his anger at 14:
How is it that both this one about talking on the phone, and the one about wanting to talk face-to-face are both on this list? Kind of sounds like a guy can't win no matter what.
It'd be engraved on their tombstone as their last words
Load More Replies..."i didn't do anything but okay" led to my breakup two days ago. he made me cry on my birthday.
What a meanie, he didn't deserve you. And happy birthday xx
Load More Replies...Related to the "have you eaten?", blaming the issue on something other than themselves, how about the "you must be on that time of the month you're grouchy" X-D b!tch, I was nicer then!! Also, has anyone else had a partner that apologizes by saying it's because they're "selfish"? if you know it's an issue, why haven't you worked on it?
Ridiculously vague 'Apologise like a man' request, fishing for men bashing responses. Well, actually, men, just like women apologise in many different ways depending on the circumstances and seriousness of the reason for the apology. This is on the same level as the one that asked, 'how does a woman admit she's wrong?' and was followed by a thousand 'We'll let you know, if it ever happens.' type comments. Can we just stop bashing each other and start getting to know, and understanding each other.
Men, women, boomer, millenial, find a demographic and ridicule those people for clicks, despite every other demographic doing exactly the same thing
Load More Replies...So men are just like women then? It’s a character thing IMHO, not a sex thing, we all fail at some point or other, we all do things that may hurt others, but it’s the ones who realise their mistakes, apologise truthfully and ensure they don’t do it again and who communicate effectively that have the depth of character and ability to read those they’ve hurt. Leave your ego behind and own your errors. PS there’s some stuff that an apology won’t work on, if you act like a idiot then you get what you deserve.
Yep, could just be non apologies from exes, regardless of gender
Load More Replies...I don't like any of these. Sometime you really are being honest and didn't want to offend/hurt but it happens. You say sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. That is a legit apology.
My husband’s apology when he's really hurt my feelings: *Blinks*….points at his crotch…”Yes?”.
I’m really frustrated with this post. It undermines manhood by claiming that men don’t apologize or take responsibility for their actions, only making excuses and blaming their wives. That’s simply not true. Men do apologize and can be accountable for their mistakes. And yes there are those that encapsulate this very post but i don't believe that's a majority.
Be nice if we had some actual context and background of what they did wrong for each response. Saying sorry for a genuine mishap or mistake is fine but expecting it when the guy literally did nothing wrong or you just interpreted it that way through your own standards and expect him to know creates confused responses and perplexed answers because the guy just wants the issue to end without having to admit fault if there genuinely is no reason too, because it's a principle not because he doesn't care or can't take 'accountability' for something. You think guys never have to apologise for messing up in other contexts of life and the sheer notion of realisation of wrong doing is alien to us? Come on don't insult our lived experiences, and show the whole exchange that led up to this.
"I'm sorry you were hurt." That one is insulting. It should be "I'm sorry I hurt you."
funny how when switched around it's 'who hurt you' like us responding to being hurt is a bad thing and should be dismissed in seconds but when it's you getting hurt it's the whole world coming to a standstill for hours or days until a resolution!
Load More Replies...Mine too. Either say nothing and continue on as if nothing happened, or go the other way and yell that it's my fault for feeling that way in the first place.
Load More Replies..."It was just a misunderstanding." "You're as much to blame as I am." "Why didn't you say something?"
"Why didn't you say something?" makes sense. We cannot always predict when our actions are upsetting someone. Some stuff is obvious, but a whole lot isn't. So sometimes you need to point it out if you want the person to stop. People can't read minds. I mean, there should be an apology in there, too, but it's a reasonable question if the offensive behaviour has gone on for a while.
Load More Replies...For everyone asking why some of these are here, the correct response when one has caused their person to feel hurt is "I'm sorry". Own it. Take responsibility. Most of these are bullshït replies.
These are all gaslighting techniques. Dump anyone who will not accept responsibility for their behavior and chooses to make you wrong for your feelings about their offenses.
my abusive ex claimed to have split-personality disorder so it wasn't really him that was beating me and choking me till I almost passed out, which he would remind me of and "apologized" every time he "snapped back to himself".
"well, I guess I'm sorry" - nope, you are not sorry, you just want me to stop being angry and are willing to say anything for it to happen, yet you will do the same thing over and over again. another favorite is "please, stop being angry" - sure, that's how that one works.
I hate the "it was an accident" well I'm so pleased she was laying there naked with her legs open so you fell and landed so your d**k fell into her vagina without hurting either of you.
I once said sorry for a,b,c and I got back so what you are saying this and that. No, what I am saying is a,b,c. Nothing more. Don't twist words or meanings. Face value
Load More Replies...It'd be engraved on their tombstone as their last words
Load More Replies..."i didn't do anything but okay" led to my breakup two days ago. he made me cry on my birthday.
What a meanie, he didn't deserve you. And happy birthday xx
Load More Replies...Related to the "have you eaten?", blaming the issue on something other than themselves, how about the "you must be on that time of the month you're grouchy" X-D b!tch, I was nicer then!! Also, has anyone else had a partner that apologizes by saying it's because they're "selfish"? if you know it's an issue, why haven't you worked on it?
Ridiculously vague 'Apologise like a man' request, fishing for men bashing responses. Well, actually, men, just like women apologise in many different ways depending on the circumstances and seriousness of the reason for the apology. This is on the same level as the one that asked, 'how does a woman admit she's wrong?' and was followed by a thousand 'We'll let you know, if it ever happens.' type comments. Can we just stop bashing each other and start getting to know, and understanding each other.
Men, women, boomer, millenial, find a demographic and ridicule those people for clicks, despite every other demographic doing exactly the same thing
Load More Replies...So men are just like women then? It’s a character thing IMHO, not a sex thing, we all fail at some point or other, we all do things that may hurt others, but it’s the ones who realise their mistakes, apologise truthfully and ensure they don’t do it again and who communicate effectively that have the depth of character and ability to read those they’ve hurt. Leave your ego behind and own your errors. PS there’s some stuff that an apology won’t work on, if you act like a idiot then you get what you deserve.
Yep, could just be non apologies from exes, regardless of gender
Load More Replies...I don't like any of these. Sometime you really are being honest and didn't want to offend/hurt but it happens. You say sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. That is a legit apology.
My husband’s apology when he's really hurt my feelings: *Blinks*….points at his crotch…”Yes?”.
I’m really frustrated with this post. It undermines manhood by claiming that men don’t apologize or take responsibility for their actions, only making excuses and blaming their wives. That’s simply not true. Men do apologize and can be accountable for their mistakes. And yes there are those that encapsulate this very post but i don't believe that's a majority.
Be nice if we had some actual context and background of what they did wrong for each response. Saying sorry for a genuine mishap or mistake is fine but expecting it when the guy literally did nothing wrong or you just interpreted it that way through your own standards and expect him to know creates confused responses and perplexed answers because the guy just wants the issue to end without having to admit fault if there genuinely is no reason too, because it's a principle not because he doesn't care or can't take 'accountability' for something. You think guys never have to apologise for messing up in other contexts of life and the sheer notion of realisation of wrong doing is alien to us? Come on don't insult our lived experiences, and show the whole exchange that led up to this.
"I'm sorry you were hurt." That one is insulting. It should be "I'm sorry I hurt you."
funny how when switched around it's 'who hurt you' like us responding to being hurt is a bad thing and should be dismissed in seconds but when it's you getting hurt it's the whole world coming to a standstill for hours or days until a resolution!
Load More Replies...Mine too. Either say nothing and continue on as if nothing happened, or go the other way and yell that it's my fault for feeling that way in the first place.
Load More Replies..."It was just a misunderstanding." "You're as much to blame as I am." "Why didn't you say something?"
"Why didn't you say something?" makes sense. We cannot always predict when our actions are upsetting someone. Some stuff is obvious, but a whole lot isn't. So sometimes you need to point it out if you want the person to stop. People can't read minds. I mean, there should be an apology in there, too, but it's a reasonable question if the offensive behaviour has gone on for a while.
Load More Replies...For everyone asking why some of these are here, the correct response when one has caused their person to feel hurt is "I'm sorry". Own it. Take responsibility. Most of these are bullshït replies.
These are all gaslighting techniques. Dump anyone who will not accept responsibility for their behavior and chooses to make you wrong for your feelings about their offenses.
my abusive ex claimed to have split-personality disorder so it wasn't really him that was beating me and choking me till I almost passed out, which he would remind me of and "apologized" every time he "snapped back to himself".
"well, I guess I'm sorry" - nope, you are not sorry, you just want me to stop being angry and are willing to say anything for it to happen, yet you will do the same thing over and over again. another favorite is "please, stop being angry" - sure, that's how that one works.
I hate the "it was an accident" well I'm so pleased she was laying there naked with her legs open so you fell and landed so your d**k fell into her vagina without hurting either of you.
I once said sorry for a,b,c and I got back so what you are saying this and that. No, what I am saying is a,b,c. Nothing more. Don't twist words or meanings. Face value
Load More Replies...