dang, thats gotta sting

Every freaking day

As an introvert this hurts because it’s true

I still have college dreams where I can't find my final's class.And , then ,I remember that I'd already graduated fifty years ago! But at least I always have my clothes on.

That´s right.

That´s my face and also my cat´s face.

I like what they did in The Good Place where they gave an option to kill yourself once you decided you had nothing to do in heaven anymore.

Don't forget all of the overthinking about potential scenarios that probably will never happen but they still *might*

Sleep is supposed to make you not tired, right? To make you not want to sleep, right? SO WHY IS IT THAT EVERY TIME I WAKE UP I AM TIRED AND WANT TO SLEEP?

Shrek.

I want a tat like that

"Not yet, but we keep *trying* to get someone to take you off our hands."

And even my nose is running

upvote for Loki

Yeah, you've hit the nail on the head with this one...

Its a 50/50 chance I'll break my neck but I'll risk it

When you're sleeping peacefully and remember that one awkward moment from 4th grade that never fails to make you cringe...

I'm focusing too hard on saying "What" after they finish to listen to what they actually say.

How'd someone get this picture of me?

thats how introverts talk

I am all too familiar with that procrastination face…

[Will Poulter meme] You guys have people who just say "Hey" to you?

Whenever a server brings me food and says "enjoy your meal" I always have to catch myself so that I don't say "you too"

I recently broke this habit if they dont care about me i wont break myself anymore for them they can eat sh1t

" Funny, but Jim never asks for a second cup of coffee."

Just don't order a Depresso then?

Yup. Years and years of being good to people... and being slapped in the face for it - then suddenly someone's nice - I don't know what to do.

Oh.. .SO many things could have been avoided if I'd just been an a$$h**e. I actually would likely have enough money to soothe the guilt of being one too. Yeah, this being considerate, compassionate, giving thing, has really only garnered a whole lot of abuse for me. Sadly.

Be silent, and be thought a fool: or speak out, and remove all possible doubt

Thank god I'm not

Very similar to "when I was your age, I had brought my own house" ...

All the time!

Someone doesn't mean anyone

I guess that's another way to burn up.

100% my favorite part of a drumstick!

Like Hapsburg royalty?

"Dad, you really gotta dial those BBQ baked beans back a little bit."

Been There......

Touché

This is particularly worrisome to me in a porta or pit toilet….

Act casual, take credit

Ngl this is so real 💀

You got two hours of sleep?!

*cries while reading book

Mine would be worse, this is mine on the weekends

...that you somehow feel is a valid argument

I feel seen.

THE STICK HAS FEELINGS AND A FAMILY! YOU CAN'T JUST THROW IT IN THE FIRE!