That’s so sweet I’m sorry for your loss

... put a cat down, just because you move? Seriously, I hope this sad excuse of an attempt to be a halfway human POS never had any fun in its life again. Fück these people, whatever treats some sentient living being, who likely loved that thing, like that doesn't deserve its feelings to be taken into account anywhere, and if, then only to make sure it hasn't any chance to have fun.

This makes my heart smile

Seems fair

Lol it’s like high school

... and did you get yourself checked out? Because if your wife didn't even remotely recognize the smell (and yes, she knows the normal smell), there might be something wrong with you, too.

Who cares if your dog is ugly. Dogs can be amazing and also ugly at the same time. You can't become a neighbourhood menace just because someone thought your dog was ugly.

Wholesomehole for the win.

🤣🤣

Bless your heart for thinking of the aged

Aw, I get why you did this. My mum died 13 years ago and my dad this year. I miss them both terribly every.single.day.

That's sweet!

This hurts.

Ahhh that's cute

Plot-twist, he did it.

Well now I'll never stop wondering what franchise that was and whether I've seen ET Ballsack.

a lot of times my to do list is things I have done. instead of a never ending list of demands... I am faced with a list of satisfaction ( and I can see I have actually accomplished a lot)

I answer my front door without my trousers on. The visitors quickly decide if I am someone they wanted to see.

I can understand this. I'd probably do the same.

Now there is a twist!

It would be seriously satisfying if someone filmed this. I'd email it to the prick everyday for as long as I needed to feel vindicated (or until the baastard had a mental breakdown - whichever came first).

This IMO has little to do with IQ. If you never learnt, you cannot do it. Good luck learning (says the woman who replaces the laces with elastics because she just can't be bothered).

Oooh! Oooh! Oooh! Do Trump next. Pleeease?!?

Good for you

LOL me-637e0ba19c94f.jpg

Lol awkward!

Agree. I had the same reaction when my son was diagnosed with autism. But yesterday, we were driving past a new development of houses near a pond. I pointed to it and asked him if he knew why it was a bad idea to build houses so close to a pond and he responded with "Tidal waves?" We laughed for about ten minutes before I said "mosquitos."

Every single word here is a wild ride!

Good point!

Get them a new dog that you love! (This is clearly a joke, chill)

I'd have PTSD if I had to socialise with Brexity Tories.

Welcome to the world of engineering we ll spend 5 hrs for a 5min fix

That made for a cute story and memory though.

Very good! I had a non-stick pan that I was very protective of. My mother knew she couldn't use it, and never did. Then she had a friend stay over who offered to cook, and used My Pan, and utterly ruined it. She didn't even offer to buy a new one because in her mind it was still good. My mom got me a new pan, but I'm still hurt.

*Bane theme intensifies

next time: put a child in "fake" command (steering wheel), and take a picture of the people faces

Atleast your mum is living her life

Most likely 🤣

Peng = very attractive for those like me who didn’t know what that meant lol

That's the same when employer fake competitor for the job opportunity you apply for... "yes, three other people are in the pipe for the same job...", just to ensure you will not ask for too much money and/or advantage

I think there might be something wrong with the connection between my eyes and my brain. I've been seeing things from the corner of my eyes that aren't there and reading words that don't exist. Three times I read "A child kept licking my seat...". I'm beginning to wonder if this isn't just a weird glitch that will straighten itself out.

This could be a sitcom plot

Lol hilarious

When I was a kid I actually asked my mother what happened to the coins people threw into the fountain at the mall, and she said "the people who clean the fountain get to have it". An answer which I still quite like to this day.

And here I am, just scrolling bored panda

This would have been the best thing ever....lol I would have laughed so damn hard 🤣

Genius!

I hope you traded your own coins...

I hate to even question this but unless you had explosive diarrhea, it's doubtful it would make a sound when the coined up poo hit the water.