Always look on the bright side of life

Or, they are just trying to engage you in conversation by asking you something obvious

I despise that! All this does is make me explode

Only if they are the last customer left.

Meaning your an a******.

I'll split the difference and go with polite indifference.

Sunshine does not help alleviate the pain when my IBS kicks in, but Buscopan does

Of course you did. You alone would not be able to make all that shît up.

"Shoot it!"

There are times when this is necessary and justified. I've had employees give me the run around and needed to escalate.

This.

Alright. Thanks for the inspiration! I will ...

Unless the rest of the sentence is 'the wonderful emergency services, the excellent upkeep of our towns and cities and a fabulous infrastructure that we can rely on' then this person is a horse's a$$.

Hear me out. Child asks for an M&M at 4PM. Okay. Asks for another. Okay. Asks for another. At some point as a responsible parent I have to say no, that's enough M&M's before dinner. Child will ask for 'please, just one more.' I've drawn the line, and if I say yes now, the negotiations continue, so I say no. Any kid worth his salt wants to know why 5 M&M's were okay, but 6 is too many. It's like 4 calories. And the truth is, I don't have a good reason. That's just where I arbitrarily drew the line. But I can't really explain that to my irrational kid who will keep eating M&M's until they puke a chocolate rainbow. So I say it, even though I swore I never would. "Because I said so." "Because I'm the dad." Because I can't reason with you about nutrition, limits, etc. One day, yes, but you aren't there yet.

"Yep, and now I mind even more"

What's wrong with disagreeing?

You did it first.

I've only ever heard this in the context of a flesh wound. In which case I desperately want to know it's not that deep, as my next 24 hours could have very different todo lists.

Who said I did?

IT IS WHAT IT IS I love this saying

That just means you’ll be paid poorly and be given terrible directions And Very little support in doing your job

yes! that doesn’t make whatever they did right.

Common sense is not so common anymore

... you are loved and wanted so please if something is bothering you talk about it to someone you trust and remember you are worth it. Have a good day guys, gals and non binary pals

No, you don't. Your truth is for you alone. If you "need to speak" it, I'd wager you don't actually believe it yourself.

Pee Wee , really?!?

Some guy I know says the word “literally” at least 5 times a sentence

This has turned into a cliché.

God, this has made me feel so embarrassed so many times. Excuse me for trying to be social, Matt.

No, I said exactly what I meant to say. What do you mean to say?