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Pro-Choice Man Shocked To Find That Wife Had An Abortion When They Dated In High School
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Pro-Choice Man Shocked To Find That Wife Had An Abortion When They Dated In High School

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Do you really believe that a person can take a secret to their grave? Because many times, it so happens that when overcome with emotions, they just spill out. And if your close ones find out these secrets, you never know how they might react.

The wife of Reddit user Appropriate-Bit6748 is, at the time of posting, 7 months pregnant and just revealed that she had a pregnancy and an abortion back when they were dating in high school. The original poster (OP) was completely shocked. He just couldn’t figure out why she didn’t tell him about it before. 

More info: Reddit

The poster and his wife dated for 2 years in high school, broke up before college, were back together in their mid-20s, and got married

Image credits: Amina Filkins (not the actual photo)

At 7 months pregnant, the wife has been feeling emotional and confessed to the poster that it brings back memories of when she aborted in high school

Image credits: u/Appropriate-Bit6748 

Pro-Choice Man Shocked To Find That Wife Had An Abortion When They Dated In High School

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Image credits: MART PRODUCTION (not the actual photo)

Although the poster is pro-choice, he was shocked and hurt that she never told him about it

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Image credits: u/Appropriate-Bit6748 

He feels that she made the right decision when she was 16 years old, however, he is very confused as to why she didn’t tell him about this after they got married

In today’s story, the poster gives us a little background about his relationship with his wife. He says that they dated for around 2 years in high school and broke up before college. Then, while they were in their mid-20s, they started dating again and eventually, got married. Now, fast-forward to his wife being 7 months pregnant, and the drama begins now that they are going to be parents.

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One day, she was feeling very emotional, and when the poster asked her why, an old secret spilled out that completely rocked the poster. The wife said that the pregnancy has brought back old memories of when she got pregnant in high school when she was 16 years old and aborted the baby. 

He was very shocked by her revelation. He mentioned that he is pro-choice and believes that she made the right decision then, as she wouldn’t have had the emotional and financial ability to take care of a kid as she was just 16. He is not upset about her choice, but what truly broke his heart is that she hid it from him even after they got married and were together for so many years.

When he asked her why she never told him about this, she replied that it was none of his business and also that she didn’t want to burden him unnecessarily. OP was ticked off by this as he felt that it was his business considering he had got her pregnant. He felt really hurt that she had not let him help and support her during such a tough time.

Well, OP was just not able to digest the fact that she hid it from him, and probably confused, he vented on Reddit, asking if he was wrong for getting angry with her. After reading his story, the netizens were divided in their opinions. Some said that they understood why he was angry with her while some said that he shouldn’t be.

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Image credits: Alex Green (not the actual photo)

In the US, around half of all pregnancies are unintended. And research shows, “Any pregnancy loss will lead to an interruption in the hormone cycle. The negative feelings (like guilt, anger, remorse, shame, loneliness, or loss of self-esteem) that occur after a planned termination may be at least due to hormonal changes, which are similar to those occurring after an unplanned pregnancy loss.”

Many Redditors pointed this out, claiming that his wife might have suffered through this after the abortion. And since it was such a personal and intense experience, she had the complete right to keep it to herself. These people felt that the poster should not be angry with his wife, but they advised him to be there for her now as she needed it.

According to Better Health Channel, “The hormones changing in your body mean you will probably have heightened emotions, both positive and negative. And you will probably swing between these emotions. About 15% of women will have depression or anxiety during pregnancy. And even more will suffer from these conditions after giving birth.”

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Folks mentioned that she must be already feeling emotional during her pregnancy and if the poster keeps being angry with her, it is not going to help anyone. They expressed their sympathy to him and said that even if he feels hurt by the secret, looking after her health at that exact moment should be the priority.

People also said that maybe she didn’t need his support then, so his being angry over it was ridiculous. Do you agree with what they said? How about you picture yourself in OP’s shoes and tell us what you would’ve done if you were caught in a similar situation? Just scroll down and type away in the comments section!

The netizens were divided as some said he was wrong for being angry with her as it was personal for her then, while some also sympathized with him, but advised him to be there for her

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Image credits: Anastasia Shuraeva (not the actual photo)

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Rutuja Dumbre

Rutuja Dumbre

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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Hey, am Rutuja! A storyteller at heart and a writer at Bored Panda. I have a strange love for words, and I mostly survive on coffee which is the driving force behind my writing. I enjoy working on articles that purely entertain our readers. When am not writing or trekking, you can find me staying up late and watching all the matches of Football Club Barcelona!

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Rutuja Dumbre

Rutuja Dumbre

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Hey, am Rutuja! A storyteller at heart and a writer at Bored Panda. I have a strange love for words, and I mostly survive on coffee which is the driving force behind my writing. I enjoy working on articles that purely entertain our readers. When am not writing or trekking, you can find me staying up late and watching all the matches of Football Club Barcelona!

Rūta Zumbrickaitė

Rūta Zumbrickaitė

Author, BoredPanda staff

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Hi! Nice to meet you~ I'm very passionate about animals, especially cats, photography, small DIY projects, music and so much more! Could say I am the TV show The Office connoisseur since I have seen it at least a dozen times~

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Rūta Zumbrickaitė

Rūta Zumbrickaitė

Author, BoredPanda staff

Hi! Nice to meet you~ I'm very passionate about animals, especially cats, photography, small DIY projects, music and so much more! Could say I am the TV show The Office connoisseur since I have seen it at least a dozen times~

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DrBronxx
Community Member
3 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"livid" is hardly the right word, BP. EDIT: Aaannd now the title has been changed. I'm caught between happy BP listened, making a more accurate title, and annoyed that my comment means nothing now.

Darius S. (he/him) cis/grey
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

ummmm. he's got time to think about this some other time... Right Now make your Pregnant wife comfy comfy comfy, she's physically growing you a love you cannot imagine yet.

Darthest Starfish
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Since he was the one that got her pregnant, regardless of the fact they ended up back together, I do believe that he had the right to know. You cannot expect a man to step up and "do the right thing" after a baby is born and also believe that he does not have a right to know of it's existence prior to birth.

WonderWoman
Community Member
3 months ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

No, he didn't have any right to know. Her body, her choices. She gets to decide who to tell and when and if to tell.

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DrBronxx
Community Member
3 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"livid" is hardly the right word, BP. EDIT: Aaannd now the title has been changed. I'm caught between happy BP listened, making a more accurate title, and annoyed that my comment means nothing now.

Darius S. (he/him) cis/grey
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

ummmm. he's got time to think about this some other time... Right Now make your Pregnant wife comfy comfy comfy, she's physically growing you a love you cannot imagine yet.

Darthest Starfish
Community Member
3 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Since he was the one that got her pregnant, regardless of the fact they ended up back together, I do believe that he had the right to know. You cannot expect a man to step up and "do the right thing" after a baby is born and also believe that he does not have a right to know of it's existence prior to birth.

WonderWoman
Community Member
3 months ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

No, he didn't have any right to know. Her body, her choices. She gets to decide who to tell and when and if to tell.

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