Asian Husband Is Furious That His American Wife Served His Family Mac N Cheese For Dinner
Cultural differences are such a thing that you can never joke about, especially when it comes to mutual communication. For example, a European or an American would only be happy if somebody gave them a watch for a holiday gift, while in many Asian cultures, such a gift would be considered indecent.
And if representatives of different cultural traditions meet in one family, then you need to be very careful not to inadvertently hurt someone’s feelings. What is perfectly acceptable to one person may seem absolutely outrageous to another.
More info: Reddit
The original poster was absolutely exhausted four weeks after delivering a baby
Image credits: raYmon (not an actual photo)
As it happened to this American Redditor, whose post on the AITA subreddit has garnered over 28K upvotes and nearly 5k supportive comments. Yes, this Redditor had a family quarrel – and all because of her husband’s relatives.
So the original poster, an American, married an Asian man and delivered a baby around four weeks ago. Of course, the woman felt completely exhausted, even though the child was completely healthy. According to her own words, she even experienced some problems with sleep.
Image credits: u/Dinner101____
Her husband’s relatives from Asia really wanted to see the newborn baby
For sure, mom did not want to see any outsiders until the situation calmed down – but her husband’s relatives really wanted to see the baby. Under various pretexts, the OP put off this visit – until one fine day she saw the whole family right on her doorstep.
It turned out the relatives had agreed with her husband and come over themselves just to see the newborn. While everyone was looking at the child, her husband asked her to cook something for dinner, and preferably something homemade. The tired housewife went to the kitchen to make mac and cheese – just because it is so easy to cook.
Image credits: u/Dinner101____
The mother-in-law found it inappropriate to serve her and the family mac and cheese
When everything was almost ready, her husband’s mother came into the kitchen – and was totally appalled. The mother-in-law asked the OP if she really found it “appropriate” to serve her and the family mac and cheese, and she went on a rant about how disrespectful this was.
Image credits: Zach Copley (not an actual photo)
The woman simply did not know about her husband’s family traditions
At the same time, the woman did not even have a clue about her husband’s family traditions, so did not understand what the actual problem was.
The poor woman was accused of serving relatives without proper respect, to which she replied the visit was absolutely unexpected, without any invitation. The husband took his relatives’ side and told they were forced to “miss” a whole month of the child’s life anyway.
Image credits: u/Dinner101____
OP’s hubby told her it was completely disrespectful towards their whole Asian culture
In general, the case ended in a scandal, and the relatives soon left. According to her husband, it would have been better for her to refuse to cook anything at all than make mac and cheese – after all, this was completely disrespectful towards not only his family but also to his culture.
Image credits: u/Dinner101____
Commenters noted that Asian culture, on the contrary, entails helping a new mother
However, most of the commenters massively supported the OP, stating that her husband’s relatives were simply ill-mannered people. Among the commenters there were a lot of Asians who noted that their culture, on the contrary, entails helping a new mother as much as possible, and bringing food on the first visit.
The OP’s hubby was also heavily criticized – after all, he should have her back, or even better – go to the kitchen himself and cook something traditional, since he wanted to please his family so much.
Most of the commenters stated that mac and cheese is really great and tasty
And, of course, most of the commenters simply stated that mac and cheese is really great and extremely tasty, which made the OP so happy. In any case, the woman should definitely show these comments to her husband – perhaps he would change his attitude and support her more.
We suppose that you have had stories of conflicting cultural traditions too, so we would strongly appreciate sharing such stories. And you will probably also be pleased with the support, like the original poster.
Ha! His family is Korean! His MOTHER is in the wrong! She should be cooking and helping take care of that baby!! His family is rude AF and no, it wouldn't be rude if they ordered delivery. That is very common nowadays. Sounds like she has a HARD road ahead with his family.
Bludgeoning someone with bs about cultural norms and customs is absolute garbage. Doesn't matter what kind of Asian heritage they come from...Korean included. I don't know any Asians where their family weren't all there trying to make the new mother as comfortable as possible. This smells a bit of the Korean family not fully embracing their non-Korean daughter-in-law.
Load More Replies...Mac n Cheese... eurgggh... it's something i'd never cook for myself. However, if someone put it in front of me in their own home I'd clean the plate, tell them how nice it was, offer to wash the dishes, and everything else that the vast majority of us were brought up to do in those circumstances. It's just manners.
If it's the pic shown, at least she made home made M&C!! I'd eat the s**t out of that, lol
Load More Replies...Why TF didn't he get his lazy, thoughtless butt into the kitchen and cook a meal? Why did he invite guests without asking you first, especially since you were recovering from birthing your baby? Your husband needs a dose of reality.
Yes! Then the part where "he doesn't cook"...come on !! It's not acceptable for him to invite them then expect her to cook ANYTHING knowing she's just had a baby and hasn't been well.
Load More Replies...Ha! His family is Korean! His MOTHER is in the wrong! She should be cooking and helping take care of that baby!! His family is rude AF and no, it wouldn't be rude if they ordered delivery. That is very common nowadays. Sounds like she has a HARD road ahead with his family.
Bludgeoning someone with bs about cultural norms and customs is absolute garbage. Doesn't matter what kind of Asian heritage they come from...Korean included. I don't know any Asians where their family weren't all there trying to make the new mother as comfortable as possible. This smells a bit of the Korean family not fully embracing their non-Korean daughter-in-law.
Load More Replies...Mac n Cheese... eurgggh... it's something i'd never cook for myself. However, if someone put it in front of me in their own home I'd clean the plate, tell them how nice it was, offer to wash the dishes, and everything else that the vast majority of us were brought up to do in those circumstances. It's just manners.
If it's the pic shown, at least she made home made M&C!! I'd eat the s**t out of that, lol
Load More Replies...Why TF didn't he get his lazy, thoughtless butt into the kitchen and cook a meal? Why did he invite guests without asking you first, especially since you were recovering from birthing your baby? Your husband needs a dose of reality.
Yes! Then the part where "he doesn't cook"...come on !! It's not acceptable for him to invite them then expect her to cook ANYTHING knowing she's just had a baby and hasn't been well.
Load More Replies...
108
83