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It’s no surprise that every stage in life comes with a different set of worries and challenges. What might come as a surprise, though, is what said set often entails.

Those who’ve already stepped into the third decade of their lives know that adulthood is no exception. Whether it’s finances, health, or other important matters that continuously remind people of themselves—often accompanied by a headache—there’s always something to worry about. If you’re wondering what that something is for different people, scroll down to find out what things our readers were not prepared for in adulthood.

Seeking to learn more about what worries people as adults and how best to deal with it all, Bored Panda turned to an expert in adult development psychology, based in the School of Human Sciences at the University of Greenwich, Dr. Oliver Robinson, who was kind enough to answer a few of our questions. Scroll down to find his thoughts in the text below.

#1

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About That you don't realise when you're supposed to be an adult. All of the sudden you're just middle aged everything hurts and you still feel like you're waiting for this adult thing to happen

Stephanie Schicker , Dimaberlin / Envato Report

#2

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About No matter how old I am I’d feel so young inside.

Eliete Sousa , monkeybusiness / Envato Report

#3

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About When they rearrange the grocery store.

Lisa West , Pixabay / Pexels Report

“Adults have an infinite number of potential worries, so the key to adult life is how not to worry about any of them. Worry doesn’t help anything, so is best dispensed with completely,” Dr. Oliver Robinson told Bored Panda in a recent interview. While not worrying is easier said than done, it might be helpful to at least try and stay calm and collected in situations that adulthood throws at you.

#4

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About Being virtually the only person left in your life who remembers anything about your childhood. It’s disorienting

Emma Matthews , ADDICTIVE_STOCK / Envato Report

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Corvus
Community Member
6 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's somewhat scary when you realize the world you grew up in is gone. Just... gone. It didn't really hit me until one day when I was passing through my late grandma's neighbourhood and saw how much had changed.

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#5

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About The older you get the more invisible you become.

Sue Duca , wirestock / Envato Report

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According to a recent Ipsos poll, now, in 2024, people tend to worry most about inflation, poverty and social inequality, and crime.

“As adults, we have to face a world where actual tragedies and potential threats are a daily occurrence, to ourselves, to those we know and to the wider world. Happiness is necessarily not a good fit with being aware of the facts of the world, and ironically, trying to be happy as an adult, while being aware of the suffering of others, can create anxiety,” Dr. Robinson pointed out.

“However, it is entirely reasonable, and indeed much recommended, to be calm and composed as an adult in the face of what we learn on the news, or issues and illnesses in our lives or the lives of those we know.

“The first step to staying calm and composed, and thus being of help to others in crisis, is not aiming to be happy. If happiness comes in quiet moments in your life, that is of course a good thing, but happiness genuinely manifests more reliably when you don’t aim for it. A calm and composed person thinks carefully through problems or issues, and does not need to worry.”

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#7

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About How expensive it is to just exist. Even after doing all the things I was told to be “successful” like getting good grades and going to college. Also the mental breakdowns, anxiety, and depression.

Megan Marie , davidgyung / Elements Report

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Even though such things as your health or the well-being of your loved ones are relevant at pretty much any stage of one’s life, once they reach a certain age, the troubles people focus on the most seem to differ with each age group.

According to the expert in adult development psychology, the main worries for young adults, for instance, are focused most on the future, both their own future and the future of the planet. “They have the burden of trying to carve out a life in a challenging world, and each big decision can be a worry. Their life is full of decisions that change the future. The key issue here is anxiety and feelings of being marginalized.

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“Middle-aged adults worry about getting old and the tiring combination of raising children, work and other societal commitments. The key issues here are burnout and tiredness,” he continued.

“Older adults’ main worries are loneliness, losing status and meaning, and losing a place in the world. The key issue here is loss of meaning and purpose.”

#9

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About Not knowing what to cook every day.

Ervin Boer , Prostock-studio / Envato Report

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ElfVibratorGlitter
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I eat whatever looks like it's about to go bad in the random food I bought. Not very creative. 🤷🏿

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#10

How childish and petty bosses and other adults can be. Some even going out of their own way to ensure others are miserable.

Anthony Holmes Report

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keyboardtek
Community Member
6 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Those people were the a******s you encountered since childhood. They grow up to be the bad bosses because they all enjoyed bullying.

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#11

That after 40, you have to decide if you’re having indigestion, anxiety attack or heart attack when you have a slight pain

Courtney Litka Report

“One of the great pathologies in modern society is the belief that the meaning of life emerges through hard work and corresponding public success, and that if you work harder and harder, suddenly the meaning of life is solved,” Dr. Robinson said.

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“But for most, it is actually love and relationships that bring meaning to life. This was brilliantly evidenced by research on terminally ill patients, where they were asked about their regrets. Two of the main regrets were working too much and not spending enough time with friends. When faced with the end of life, as these terminally ill patients were, the meaning of it becomes more clear.

“So slow down and make sure that your life is well balanced between relationships, family, exercise, leisure and work. For those who are not working, make sure to find activities that give social connection and purpose, such as social hobbies.”


#12

Adults seemed so grown up and mature when I was a child. As an adult... Boy was I wrong.

Mel Robertson Report

#13

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About That life is just about winging it. You never know the answers to everything or have the solutions to everything.

Mariah Sams , look_studio / Envato Report

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#14

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About Needing to sleep then not being able to.

Cynthia Kremsner , DC_Studio / Envato Report

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Mia Black
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I just had four days off but woke up more than two hours BEFORE my alarm would go on at a workday....I have sleep issues ever since I remember, sometimes better sometimes worse but this year is somehow special. There seem to be no breaks. Frustrating. Especially after two very stressful years. This year I wanted to recover at least a little because the stressor is gone but noooo, my body (and/or mind) decided to act this weird...tsk

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#15

That apparently not all adults matured past high school

Erin Michele McCollum Report

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Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa)
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Al Bundy syndrome. He did four touchdowns in one game and married the head cheerleader. Married With Children was such an underrated sitcom.

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#16

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About Body aches and pains. Chores, never ending chores. Bills, never ending bills to pay! Adulting is hard.

Cat-White Zoey , YuriArcursPeopleimages / Envato Report

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Tabitha
Community Member
6 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And along with those aches and pains you have diminished energy. I used to be able to be active from sunrise to sundown and get so much done in one day, which left me with a lot more leisure time since I got everything done so fast. At 63, I now have to divide up my chores over several days, with rest periods in between, just to keep everything in order and completed. I know, I probably should’ve always paced myself, but I didn’t really have to so I didn’t. I liked getting everything done in as little time as possible, so I would have just that much more time where I didn’t have to do any work and could relax and do fun stuff I wanted—-not needed, not had—-to do. I miss that energy.

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#17

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About How much it will hurt when you lose your parents.

Jessica MacKinnon Allen , vladans / Envato Report

#18

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About That you still can’t have as many horses/dogs/cats as you want - or live in a castle.

Ali Singleton , Gerain0812 / Envato Report

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LakotaWolf (she/her)
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I was a kid, my mom tried to get me onboard with becoming a "famous actress" by telling me I could have a huge house with as many pets as I wanted. Turns out SHE just wanted me to become a famous child actor so that SHE could get the money and never have to work again XD I do have four pets currently - two cats and two dogs - and they are a LOT of work, but I wouldn't trade them for anything XD

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#19

That you can have the time or the money but never both at the same time.

Lesley Typhair Report

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#20

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About How much bras hurt your body by the end of the day, even if they're properly fitted.

Charlene MacKenzie , austinschulz / Envato Report

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LakotaWolf (she/her)
Community Member
6 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My fellow people with large-ish breasts: the MINDD brand bra is the BEST bra I have found in my 42 years of life. I am largeish-breasted (38DD) and I loathe underwire bras. They have caused me so much pain over the years and I've even gotten skin sores from the wires poking/chafing/etc. The MINDD bras might SEEM a little iffy since they don't have underwires, but they are WONDERFUL bras and I can *WASH THEM NORMALLY*. They are pricey (what bras aren't? sigh) but they are VERY worth it.

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#21

The idea of working hard, always trying to do what is right,that you win in the end. So very wrong. The good does not overcome all the evil. So hard for me to accept.

Donna Whitaker Report

#22

Realizing how many people youll have to deal with throughout life that are so incompetent.

Anthony Lerro Report

#23

How things that clean other things also need to be cleaned?!

Rebecca Lambert Report

#24

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About Watching your parents age. Seeing them go from young parents to elderly grandparents is….both beautiful and painful.

Amanda Jones , Johnstocker / Envato Report

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LakotaWolf (she/her)
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Never got to see this with my dad, the only non-abusive parent I had :( He had an accident when I was 18 (he sustained catastrophic brain damage in the accident and became near-vegetative) and we took care of him at home for 20+ years. He died in 2021. I wish he was still here, but my dad was "gone" long before he actually died. My mother, who is a toxic narcissist and abusive.... she's 79 and STILL somehow puttering around, strong as ever, powered by pure evil.

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#25

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About That women are not allowed to get old. They are expected to stay young, thin and perky forever.

Ivona Zelman , mstandret / Envato Report

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LakotaWolf (she/her)
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Then you hit age 40 and you realize "Wow! This is stupid! Why do I give a rat's patootie about what OTHER PEOPLE think about how I dress?" and you start wearing men's cargo shorts (pockets!!!!) and cute t-shirts with cartoon cats on them. You don't care that you weigh 150 lbs but "should" weigh 115 lbs (according to your boyfriend, who can shove it.) Hair frizzy? If you don't care, then don't care about what other PEOPLE think! Don't feel like putting on makeup today? THAT IS OKAY! Take care of yourself and your hygiene, yes, but your MENTAL health re: your clothing, appearance, etc. is also excruciatingly important. I did not learn that until my early 40s. I spent 20+ years trying to be the cute, thin, well-dressed, fashionable girl that I thought my boyfriend wanted. Now, if he loves ME, then he loves ME, and not what I wear or how perky my tiddlywinks are.

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#26

That you may end up being the most “adult” person you know and other “adults” will look to you in “I need an adult” moments.

Robin Mann Report

#27

Everything going up so much faster than my rate of pay.

Liz O'Neill Report

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keyboardtek
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The rich elite billionaires are money sucking pariahs. But our political parties still give them tax cuts and all the breaks, while never increasing minimum wage or workers salaries. They ultimately are the cause of inflation as they have to maintain their profit margins at the consumers expense.

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#28

The Development of allergies at almost 30 when u never had them

China Randle Report

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Screaming_Icecream
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah! As a kid, I always played with cats, stroked, hugged and kissed them and whatever, and nothing bad ever happened! Now I just sit nearby a cat at the vet's waiting room, and I'm all in tears, snot, my whole body itches and I have troubles breathing. But I still love cats and would like to pet them once in a while...

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#29

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About That I could afford all the video games but never have time to play them

Jake Brudda , lira_n4 / Envato Report

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Lene
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When we expected our first kid my bf bought some playstation games for him to play when the baby was asleep when he was on his paternal leave. And now.... 7 years later... the games are not even unwrapped from the plastic they came in. Lol.

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#30

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About Getting up in a morning with more injuries than u went to bed with

Wendy Donald Mitchelson , Prostock-studio / Envato Report

#31

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About Getting to grips with the reality that nothing really matters and we are all going to die eventually sooner than we expected - we’ll be buried with our very big dreams, expectations and life ambitions that we slowly, every year, gave up on trying to attain. On the flip side, the realization that health and the small moments with loved ones is really all that goes with you to the grave.

Rola Fattal , DisobeyArtPh / Envato Report

#32

How much effort it takes just to take care of yourself and stay alive

Linn OnePower Report

#33

Even when you treat others the way you want to be treated they could not return the favor

Amy Hein-Bavuso Report

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Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Could not? No. Would not, yes. Some people just don't care. Some people are too damaged. Some people are too busy. It's when you find those few that WILL that really makes trying worth it.

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#34

How boring it can be. You work, take care of other people, eat, sleep, then wake up and do the same thing the next day and the next. The monotony gets broken when something c****y pops up but you still have those regular obligations.

Olivia Burrell-Jackson Report

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Rafael
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Whoa, I wasn't expecting them to consider cräppy a curse word, didn't even think of it when doing my routine shuffle of bad words to try to guess the censored word!

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#35

You gotta buy YOURSELF gifts
Or no one will

Danit Shaul Report

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Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

On the other paw, you know better than anyone what kind of presents you like, and what size/color/flavor/platform you want it in.

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#36

Having to remember 20+ different passwords

Jonathon Highlander Report

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Hannah
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ah yes. Required number of characters; this one requires a SPECIAL character, something upper case, lower case, a number. I can see why people write them down.

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#37

That you are alone and you will never feel safe and secure . The constant worry about everything

Jeje Mochosho Report

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Sarah Suelzle
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have felt this way my entire life with only a few brief respites here and there 😐

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#38

Having to work for a living, forever.

Brandon Parker Report

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keyboardtek
Community Member
6 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The only people I personally know who were able to retire early with a lot of money chose not to have kids. They saved a ton of money and now travel in a motor home in their retirement years, have a paid off mortgage, and generally are very comfortable. They did not have a single regret not having children.

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#40

If you do not agree with EVERYTHING other adults say they hate you.

Kyle Bergman Report

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Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If someone hates you for having a different opinion, that person is not an adult, no matter what their chronological age. Adults recognize and enjoy their differences. For instance, I believe in God. Most of the people on BP whom I consider friends do not. We still enjoy meowing/barking/chirping at each other. We still read what each other has written, and often find things to agree on. It's ok to disagree. You can still be respectful of people; you can still enjoy each other's company, and you can still celebrate your differences.

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#41

Still worrying about my adult children's safety.

Colleen Wilson Report

#42

You never become an adult, you're only cosplaying one. But no one tells you that as a kid becsuse they are busy cosplaying.

Maya Cheshmedzhieva Report

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Multa Nocte
Community Member
6 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think the difference here is that many children believe they have to grow up to be totally independent and self-sufficient as an adult. Once you learn that you don't have to do everything yourself, that there are people and organisations out there that help you and that you are part of an interdependent ecosystem, that changes your perspective. The belief in "total independence" is where the problem lies. I am guessing this is tougher for men than for women because of cultural expectations.

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#43

You need 20 years to learn stuff. That is outdated in 5

Bram Diederik Report

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Rick
Community Member
6 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Especially when almost all other creatures on the planet are fully functional and ready to live on their own in a matter of months.

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#44

No one told me becoming an old adult would hurt so much

Nicky Eves Report

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#45

45 Adult Problems People Wish They Were Warned About Life itself? How hard it is to be an adult? Being lost and not knowing what to do ?

Yas Mine , YuriArcursPeopleimages / Envato Report

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DotC
Community Member
6 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was looking for the one that said how rare it is that I knew who I was and what I wanted to go to school for since I was 14. I am still in that field. And what kind of partner I wanted since 25. When I got divorced at 51, I found my list from 25. It's 75% the same. I have not met anyone while dating that knows who they are or what they want out of life.

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#46

That there really are no more “special days”. When you get to be an “established” (over 30) adult, nobody really gives a crap if it’s your birthday, Mother’s Day etc. But you are still expected to make them special for other people.

Jennifer Smith Blake Report

#47

How difficult it is being your parents caretaker

Tonjala Knight-Worrell Report

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#48

Credit scores!! How easy it is to lose points, how hard it is to get them back and how they control everything!!

Jes Rogan Report

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ElfVibratorGlitter
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And they actually don't make sense. Like if you maintain a healthy credit limit, your debt ratio looks bad, open more credit cards... credit score improves.

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#49

The mailbox only contains bills and junk mail. Now I know why my parents never seemed to care about getting the mail while my sister and I fought over who got to go get it

Sarah Cee Report

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Lene
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Get some snail mail pen pals. I promise you it will make you LOVE checking the mail box again 💚💚💚

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#50

People depend on you all the time.
Family, friends, pets, work, neighbors, society.
It’s ok, but also quite daunting when you just feel like curling up in the corner with your blanket and a book and have quiet time.

Renee Bianchi Report

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#51

How everything snap crackles and pops and your in constant pain and everything irritates you.

Drea Molina Report

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#52

Having to unlearn all the toxic beliefs and behaviors that were forced on you growing up so you can start to heal from your childhood trauma and become a healthy, functioning adult. It's so much work. But so worth it. Been in therapy for 14 years now. I am a much more whole and self assured individual who has self love and sets clear boundaries.

Alyssa Ostroff Report

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Multa Nocte
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It is true that if you grew up in a toxic environment you do have to work actively to make your life better. It's a lot of work to get out of toxic beliefs and patterns, but it is well worth it.

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#53

How much u actually turn into ur parents...
I always said I wouldn't yell at my kids like my mom... then I yell and sound exactly like her.... same phrases and everything... I be about to blow my top and just walk away because y yall got me sounding like this... I was supposed to be a cool mom

China Randle Report

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SweetCheesySpaghetti
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Every time I get loud with my son, I have to remind him that I don't like acting that way, and that I'm sorry I lost my composure, but my big feelings got ahead of me. It has been WORK trying to teach him the difference between yelling because he's a nuisance and yelling because I'm human and sometimes lose my grip. My parents always made me feel so unloved because they yelled so much.

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#54

Paying bills

Christie Capetta Suro Report

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#55

All the changes your body goes through as you get older. I wish someone would have told me so I could have been more prepared.

Michael Eppard Report

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Michael Largey
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've lived 25 years longer than my father did and 40 years longer than his father did. Like Mickey Mantle said, "If I had known I would live this long, I would have taken better care of myself."

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#56

That as an adult, you still don't know what you are doing. it's all a lie

Maritt Vermeulen Report

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Michael Largey
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Becoming an adult is when we stop realizing that we don't know what we're doing.

#57

It’s harder to meet people and start relationships once your done with school

Jesse Barker Report

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Lene
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I strongly recommend, if you have little kids, that you talk with the moms in your kid's day care or kindergarten. I am pretty introverted and usually think I'm an annoying and sorta dumb person... but we're a group of 4 moms in my kids' kindergarten that just end up talking and talking and talking a few mornings every week and I feel pretty safe with them! And I am seriously thinking about proposing that when our kids go to school we should still meet up perhaps just once per month and chat and get something to eat. I hope it will work out!

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#58

The lost ability to run. I so admire seniors who can run.

Kay Romines Report

#59

Mostly about boundaries, but that is not only adult, it's a human issue. And respecting yourself as well as others. Never allowing anyone to make you feel less worthy.

Laina Rigos Report

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#60

I wasn't warned about the fact that being an adult means having your back hurting all the time.

Cynthia Kirby Report

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keyboardtek
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Physical education in school should not be about competitive sports. It should be about how to lift properly, how to maintain good posture while staring at a computer for hours, the importance of daily stretching and core strength for spine health. Unfortunately we do not learn any of this until we injure ourselves and the physical therapist starts to educate us.

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#61

That safety and "being safe" were not the same. That parents, partners, friends, family...were just titles and that when you get older, there is no such thing as certainty.

Andrew Bass Report

#62

Being an adult (and the expectations that go with it) and feeling like an adult are two totally different things.

Sharna Autenzio Report

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Michael Largey
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've never felt like an adult. I've always felt like ...well, me.

#63

The feeling you get when people around you are starting family’s and it feels like yesterday you were all kids lol like why are we all having “teenage (mid twenties) pregnancy’s “

Macey Hay Report

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#64

That I would always feel like I am two steps behind, mentally exhausted and feeling like I am not good enough.

Brenda Machell Taylor-Moody Report

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Jill Rhodry
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You are good enough, you are worthwhile, you're just right. Please try not to compare yourself to others, you're on your own journey and the only person you compare yourself to is your past you.

#65

The emotional intelligence and aptitude needed to get through this life and the fact that many of us don't even know the amount of work necessary to achieve it.

Shaun James Report

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keyboardtek
Community Member
6 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And then we have kids and expect that to give us happiness.

#66

You will likely receive more love and support from strangers than you will from your own friends and family.

Lacey Burrows Report

#67

When you young you trust everyone but by the time your middle age you will not trust anyone.

Tracy Louise Maltby Report

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Multa Nocte
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nah, with time I believe you get better at judging this (unless you are someone who seems to thrive only when things are predictably toxic and who seems to think that "predictable/negative" is better than "new and scary").

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#68

I’d be able to provide for myself all by myself if I went to college. I’d never have to worry about money if I got a college degree

Katrina Marie Report

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#69

Your grown kids will still stress you out!

Stephanie Branham Report

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#70

How difficult it actually is to get pregnant

Corey Amanda Redding Report