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Thank you, Captain Obvious!

There are plenty of obvious things that people love to discuss, like how the weather currently is and how soon the holidays are. It’s totally fine to bring up topics like this in a self-aware way: “I know this is obvious, but I just really need to make small talk.” But sometimes, people think they’re being philosophical when they’re really just stating the obvious.

Below, we’ve gathered some of our favorite posts from the That’s How Things Work subreddit, which is dedicated to highlighting people who tried to be deep but failed miserably. From explaining concepts that already have a name to sharing “shower thoughts” that they probably should have kept to themselves, this list is full of funny, facepalm-worthy moments that might make you lose a bit of faith in humanity.

Be sure to upvote the posts that you get a kick out of, and then let us know in the comments: what’s the most obvious thing you’ve ever had explained to you before? Then, if you’re interested in checking out another Bored Panda article featuring obvious things people learned embarrassingly late in life, you can find that right here!

Not everything needs an explanation. When we’re children, we’ll need to have some things spelled out for us because we’re learning everything from scratch, but as adults, we should be able to assume many things are common sense. Unfortunately, common sense isn’t always super common. No one knows that better than the members of the That’s How Things Work subreddit. This group, which currently has nearly 85k members, is dedicated to featuring all of those #deep posts that might make you question humanity’s sanity. Common themes on the subreddit are “Shower Thought”, "Article", and "Deep", but I have to say, Article is the most concerning to me.

Even our news sources are sometimes reporting blatantly obvious headlines, but maybe that should be obvious to me… This list makes it clear that the entire internet is full of painfully obvious statements. Social media, news sites, dating apps, and Wikipedia, we’re all capable of being Captain Obvious. But according to Portland Therapy Center, there might actually be a reason why we tend to say things that can go without saying.

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#4

Help Me I’m Drowning

Help Me I’m Drowning

tigbitties888 , twitter.com Report

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Saggi
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nah it’s all good, I’ll just pick my favourite lifeguard to save me.

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#5

He Blames Pot

He Blames Pot

SalazarRED , thereal-obama.tumblr.com Report

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ShyWahine
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

♫♪♪ Cause I got high, Because I got high, Because I got high ... ♫♪♪

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#6

Ah Yes. Evolution Has Nothing To Do With Genetics

Ah Yes. Evolution Has Nothing To Do With Genetics

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Bernd Herbert
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Religious nut trying to criticise the theory of evolution doesn’t actually know what it is. That’s not surprising at all

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“It’s so hot outside!” Of course it is, we can all feel it. So why do we feel the need to say things like this? Portland Therapy Center notes on their site that the main reason we want to state the obvious is to feel connected to others. “Language is our way of sharing understanding. In the distant past, all we had to communicate was the sound of our voices and smoke signals, and those important signals warned of war parties and resources,” Dr. Gregory Devore writes. “In today’s hyper-connected world, we now augment our reality by using email, text, phone, and social media apps to share information about just about anything.” 

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Stating the obvious also makes sense from an evolutionary perspective. “When ideas are shared, creativity and action can occur,” Dr. Devore explains. “Those who are better communicators are more likely to receive support from others.” And if we don’t have support, we put ourselves at risk. So it’s perfectly natural to want to share our experiences with other humans, even if that means stating something super obvious. It’s snowing out, and you know that because you’re experiencing it too, but here’s a reminder that we’re all in this together.

#7

Headlines

Headlines

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Rocke-Road
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They need to arrest death as soon as possible! They can't keep getting away with it!

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#8

Low Battery? Charge Your Phone

Low Battery? Charge Your Phone

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#9

Opinions Must Be Objective

Opinions Must Be Objective

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Dr. Devore also notes that when we bring attention to how we’re feeling, we might work together with others to help remedy the situation. Personally, I tend to ignore something if I think I’m the only person feeling bothered. If I am freezing in my office and having trouble typing because my hands are numb, I’m not likely to bring it up. But if someone else does, I’ll suggest that we turn on the heater we have available and confirm that I feel cold as well. When you and a friend both agree that it’s hot outside, you might decide to go grab an iced coffee or stop in a café for a drink and to cool off in the air conditioning. Rather than responding with a sarcastic and dismissive response when someone states the obvious, use that as an opportunity to validate their thoughts and find a connection.

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#10

How Stock Photos Work

How Stock Photos Work

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Rocke-Road
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah Man you can take a pic of us chilling with the hooman, it all good

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#12

Yes, That’s How Genetics Work

Yes, That’s How Genetics Work

kill3r326 , cassjaytuck.tumblr.com Report

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David
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not only the obvious of being related in the fictional story but also the Disney "gene pool" is limited due to making their characters fit other formulaic criteria. Like oversized eyes and small noses and such to make them "cute and lovable" or whatever. If you are going to look like Ursula in the Little Mermaid you are going to be a bad person. If you are the 'good' star you have large eyes / small nose like Ariel. Occasional exceptions but for the most part they are all going to look like they might be related.

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Many of the posts on this list are people who were attempting to be deep or philosophical on social media, but they ended up just stating the most obvious things. In 2019, Laura Brown published an article on Forbes discussing this exact topic titled “Trying To Sound Smart Could Be Making You Look Dumb”. She notes that for some reason, many people have the idea that if you write clearly and directly, you don’t sound as intelligent as if you use an unnecessary amount of words, particularly buzz words. But the first issue that Laura takes with that kind of writing is that not everyone will understand it. “It’s possible to get your head so deeply into jargon and convoluted language that you’re actually quite hard to understand,” she writes. Just because you’ve managed to confuse people doesn’t mean you sound intelligent.

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#15

Yes, Doing Things Have Consequences

Yes, Doing Things Have Consequences

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Another issue with the kind of “eloquent business writing” that many companies try to use is that it can simply make you look bad. In fact, there’s even research to support this conclusion. Carnegie Mellon psychologist Daniel Oppenheimer wrote a paper titled “Consequences of Erudite Vernacular Utilized Irrespective of Necessity: Problems with Using Long Words Needlessly” (now that’s a mouthful!), and he found that readers actually consider unnecessarily long words as less intelligent than simpler vocabulary. “It’s important to point out that this research is not about problems with using long words but about using long words needlessly,” he noted. “One thing seems certain: write as simply and plainly as possible and it’s more likely you’ll be thought of as intelligent.”

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#16

Yes That’s How It Usually Works

Yes That’s How It Usually Works

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#17

Cecil’s Brother, Jericho, Is Also A Lion, Don’t You Know That!?

Cecil’s Brother, Jericho, Is Also A Lion, Don’t You Know That!?

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Just like trying far too hard to write in an “intelligent” way, trying way too hard to sound “deep” can certainly backfire. Pointing out the weather is a socially acceptable way of discussing what goes without saying, but when it comes to trying to explain obvious things to sound intelligent, you’re certain to get called out. But if we really want to channel someone who’s been featured on the That’s How Things Work subreddit, we could dive down the rabbit hole of, “Well, what’s obvious to one person may not be obvious to everyone else.” For example, when there are crumbs, dirt or anything else on the floor in my apartment, it makes my skin crawl. It is glaringly obvious to me, and I cannot rest until it’s been swept or vacuumed up. My former roommates, however, did not feel the same way and thought that I was crazy for seeing these crumbs with my “hawk eyes”.

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#19

Kinda The Goal, Right?

Kinda The Goal, Right?

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Rocke-Road
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Parents: We want your life to be easier for you! Parents when my life is easier: WELL BACK IN MY DA-

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#20

That's Why It's Called A Virus

That's Why It's Called A Virus

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Saggi
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think this thread is running out of ideas. I mean shower thoughts was good i at first, now they just getting a wee bit desperate.

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Have you ever heard someone note that their therapist told them something that they would have never figured out on their own, but once they heard it, it seemed entirely obvious? We can’t always see the “obvious” things that are right in front of our eyes, due to our own biases or based on the life experiences we’ve had. If you’re a doctor, a patient might come in extremely confused about what’s wrong with them, but once they explain their symptoms, it might be obvious to you what’s wrong with them. Yes, the photos on this list are not great examples of when we should give someone the benefit of the doubt, because those things are definitely obvious. But just some food for thought: what’s blatantly obvious to you might blow someone else’s mind.

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#22

This Is A Fact

This Is A Fact

reddit.com , twitter.com Report

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Thorsten Massow
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He might even be the richest person in the solar system, but this fact can not be derived from the previous statements.

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#24

If You Know How Old It Is Then You Know How Old It Is

If You Know How Old It Is Then You Know How Old It Is

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As a kid, I used to get annoyed in school all the time because I would refrain from answering a question or pointing something out that I thought was extremely obvious (because why would I say what goes without saying?), but then inevitably, someone else would say exactly what I was thinking a few minutes later and be praised for how smart they were or what an excellent point they made. After many years of having that experience, I finally decided to start pointing out the obvious (within reason). As it turns out, by stating what seems clear as day to you, you might be introducing a great idea or sparking a new thought in someone else. Don’t be scared to share your ideas, unless they’re as obvious as the things on this list…

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#25

R/Showerthoughts At It Again

R/Showerthoughts At It Again

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Saggi
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And I am pretty sure billboards were made before online ads, it’s like saying, a newspaper is like IRL Google.

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#26

Yep, The Wind Can Blow Across State Borders

Yep, The Wind Can Blow Across State Borders

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Rocke-Road
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Impossible! We have to complain on Twitter about it so air pollution will go away!

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Obviously, this list has some facepalm-worthy posts. But it’s not obvious to me which pics you’ll find the most cringey or hilarious, so be sure to make use of that upvote button! We hope you enjoy the rest of these painfully obvious posts, and then if you’re interested in checking out even more of them, you can find the That’s How Things Work subreddit right here! (That’s a link. Click the link on the words “right here”. Was that obvious enough?)        

#28

That's Pretty Much It Yeah

That's Pretty Much It Yeah

CoolBoyClarence , twitter.com Report

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Saggi
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think in this persons mind it made sense, but then they said it out loud, and it just sounds batshit crazy.

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#30

Roses Are Red, I Serve My Master-

Roses Are Red, I Serve My Master-

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Nadine Debard
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I translate : A nuclear explosion so far away from us would be a disaster even for us

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#33

I Am Enlightened By Such Powerful Knowledge

I Am Enlightened By Such Powerful Knowledge

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#35

Thanks I Didn't Know That

Thanks I Didn't Know That

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Blurryface
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That is a cursed hotdog version of Buzz that I have never seen before. Eye bleach Pwease?

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#36

Its A Christmas Miracle!

Its A Christmas Miracle!

Karim90716 , twitter.com Report

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VikingAbroad
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Then imagine the 31st of December 1999. The 1st of January 2000 was both the next day, the next month, the next year, the next century and the next millennium. I was there! It was actually not crazy. No IT crash, the TV worked, no aliens, just some mediocre fireworks and then we were sent to bed.

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#38

A Woman Who Looks Like Her Parents

A Woman Who Looks Like Her Parents

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#39

Frenemies

Frenemies

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Mahayana
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I used to sell Christmas lights that had the disclaimer : only for outside in inside use… what’s the third option?!! To this day, I still don’t know and it keeps me up at night.

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#42

How Dare They Ask

How Dare They Ask

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Green Tree
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ok I looked this up because it seemed like the headline was trying too hard to make them seem stupid. The couple left their jackets and whatnot at the table and stepped out to the restaurant's smoking area for a cigarette. They were outside for a couple minutes when the server came out and confronted them about the bill in front of the other customers.

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#43

Thats How Vaccines Work

Thats How Vaccines Work

woodenbroom Report

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Nadine Debard
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Covid vaccines don't contain whole covid virus. They contain some mRNA from the virus, which is a molecule, not a germ. Edit: mRNA or DNA or spike protein...

Xottel
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To explain it roughly: There's no need to bring in a live culprit to introduce to your immune system. The mRNA vaccine hands out leaflets with a photo and teaches your body how a virus would look like if it actually entered your organism.

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Lily Mae Kitty
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

an old guy was wearing an "Indict Fauci" tee the other day so I asked for what(I know I should not poke the animals) and he said it's b/c he lied about everything and he's in with Biden. I said, but he worked under 5 presidents of both parties and Biden wasn't president when covid started. He said he'd never heard that he worked under other presidents. I guess he thought he just came on the scene at 80. argh

PolymathNecromancer
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It seems to me that 100% of people who are like this have total blanks of who actually is or was in charge of whatever they are protesting.... sigh

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Saggi
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nooooo. What!? And here i was thinkin they injected Poly Juice into you, then you turned into a virus to kill the virus.

Moezzzz
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Prob want to stay away from needles like that too. Jeezus, if a needle dents the skin, that f****r is duller than my 2nd cousin explaining how fast turtles can ski. Yes, that was a conversation, and yes, he was dead serious. Spoiler alert- it's not very fast

Jenn C
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The Covid vaccine is one of the few vaccines that don't the virus.

FatKid Games
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When General Washington Mandated his soldiers get vaccinated for small pox at valley forge they cut the skin of uninfected, took puss from the pox of an infected person and smeared it into the cut...and imagine this....it worked!! Can you believe it, science is real!

Paul Dodd
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is variolation, not vacation, and much more dangerous. Vaccination was invented later.

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GadgetGirl
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Think of it like a Monty Python sketch. The guards are at the castle discussing swallows when the runner from the next castle over brings them a picture. "This bad guy here just waltzed right in and killed a bunch of our people! He's super dangerous, be on the lookout!" So they make photocopies of the picture and post it everywhere. "This is the ENEMY" the posters say. They even practice fighting him. They've heard from survivors of other attacks, and they know how he fights. Sure, the practice scares some of the people in the castle; all this rushing around and yelling, but no one actually dies, they're just frightened. When the baddie rides in, clopping his coconut shells together menacingly, the guards know just what to do because they practiced. They dispatch him quickly, and everyone can go back to talking about swallows. The guards are your immune system. The baddie is the virus. The wanted posters are the vaccine. The castle is you.

Stranger-Has Candy
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

WOW. I have never (don’t hit me, please 🫠) been able to get into Monty Python. However, yours is the BEST analogy I’ve read so far, and I doubt I’ll come across one better. I’m curious if your gadgets include pipettes, petrie dishes, agars, and microscopes. Maybe a centrifuge or two. An autoclave, perhaps? (No need to answer. Just seems you have a background in science… Or medicine.) It’s a shame that so many people have already formed their (*misinformed*) opinions and won’t learn a thing from your amazing comment. Still, though… BRAVA!

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Grimstones
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

being a mobile hotspot sounds really useful, and if it didn't have side effects you could sign me up

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Margaret Weaver
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This kind of malarkey has to be conscious population control, don't you think? Anyone dense enough to fall for this, is effectively removed from the population by covid. I cannot honestly believe someone would make this ad AND be dense enough to believe this. They spelled treatment AND vaccinated correctly!

BJ Hage
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also, Contain=To halt the spread or development of; check. Poor choice of words.

Pieter LeGrande
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My neighbour reckons we are safe in Australia 'cos we don't get vaccinated. Instead we get immunised.

Bird SharkRawr
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Can we just agree to stop trying to explain things to people that clearly don’t want to live anymore? 😂

Audra Sisler
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Story time!!! This is not a joke. My husbands boss has a daughter, and I'm sorry I can't remember if Navy or Army, but she is very high ranking. Anywho one day she asked her dad if he had gotten the vaccine. He said no and she said....... Good, don't. They haven't flipped the switch yet but they will. I'm sorry WHAT?!?!?! 😳😳😳

Stephanie A Mutti
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Some of these folks need a brain vaccine... because then they'll get at least a little brain.

Mary Elliott
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I highly recommend that anti-vaxxers not get vaccinated, in order to expedite their removal from the gene pool.

Marianne Luginbuhl
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Unfortunately, they are dragging healthcare with it, as well as the economy. So get vaxxed and help yourself and humanity.

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Jane Hower
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Misnamed on PURPOSE!! It's just a F...King Flu Shot, totally untested and full or bad side effects. VACCINES are those like Small Pox, Polio, that mean you NEVER get the disease. These VAX's for Covid do not keep you from getting it, sometimes several times, or passing it on. DO NOT TAKE THEM!!!!!

Ruth Hempsey
Community Member
1 year ago

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Aw c**p. Not this again. Some people believe this. Erase, erase, delete, delete.

3 Owls In A Coat
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Aw c**p. Not this kind of comment again. Some uneducated people really think like this. Downvote, downvote, downvote.

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Emory White
Community Member
1 year ago

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Has anyone else noticed the high fatality and blood clotting rates in the people who are covid-vaccinated?

Marianne Luginbuhl
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's the opposite. People who aren't vaccinated and get covid are much more likely to have clots ( heart, brain, lung) and be very sick and or die.

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#44

That's What Nostalgia Is

That's What Nostalgia Is

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Christian Fuller
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Here's an interesting tip-in. One kid is nine years old, but a bunch of them are called nine year olds.

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#45

M I N D B L O W I N G

M I N D B L O W I N G

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#46

Person Wouldn’t Be Famous If They Did Not Do What Made Them Famous

Person Wouldn’t Be Famous If They Did Not Do What Made Them Famous

Spaghettiboobin , twitter.com Report

#47

Company Wants People To Buy Their Product

Company Wants People To Buy Their Product

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#48

Thanks For The Advice

Thanks For The Advice

reddit.com Report

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David
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

TRUE STORY (I'll try to keep it brief). McDonalds drive through. Friend in car has sensitive teeth so drinks warm water because cold water hurts. I order food and a cup of warm water. I s...t you not.. "I'm sorry sir we don't have warm water. We only have cold water and hot water.". Me:... Me: "Well, could you put some hot water and some cold water in the same cup to make it warm water?" Drive through lady: (pause). "I guess we could do that". Me: "Okay, do that please". We were laughing so hard we were crying but we were trying to keep it together at the drive through window because we didn't want to be mean. Maybe she was having a bad day and just had a moment. Or maybe she was dumb AF. Years ago. We still laugh about it if she wants some warm water.

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